#bender headcanons

Before Bender is intimate with someone you can guarantee that he's either smoking or drinking a lot (or both) so you can expect those smells to be lingering on him quite often. Because of this, he wouldn't mind how much you do these things too, and will even engage with smoking and drinking during the act if he's able to.

When it actually comes to doing anything NSFW with Bender, he typically isn't very romantic with you. He's not very good at expressing himself in this way so don't expect candles and rose petals (you'll get a basic bedroom at best if he's interested). However, he will be more romantic if he feels like he's done something wrong and wants to make it up to you, but this is on very rare occasions.

He'll also probably be intimate with you during chaotic situations or just after them, such as the chance of an attack or getting into trouble because of a crime he's committed. Either way he loves the adrenalin it gives him and makes him crave you as soon as he has the chance. He may even be intimate with you just to cause chaos itself sometimes if you agree to it.

Bender loves and will definitely try his best to show off when the two of you are being intimate as often as he can. However, he isn't very good at keeping himself in check when he does this so he'll either mess up due to being distracted or will simply lose interest in showing off just so he can focus all of his attention on you.

Bender is always open to experiment with you, and will even try things for a second time if he didn't exactly enjoy it the first time or if things didn't go to plan. He also loves to experiment on you a lot, as it gives him a power trip and makes him giddier than usual.

- You met Bender in detention. When Vernon left all of you alone, he began to badger you about how you got there. Finally, you’d had enough and just told him the boring, slightly embarrassing truth: you were just late to class too many times.

- You shyly glanced over at him after you said it, only to find a small smirk on his face.

“Oh that’s adorable,” he said and you could feel your face turn hot. “No, that’s really cute. I mean it’s just so-”

“Alright Bender.” Andy interrupted. Bender glared and turned on the wrestler, something you were quite thankful for in the moment.

- Throughout the entire detention, he tried to get you to pay attention to him. He moved his seat next to yours, played with your hair, toyed around with how close you would let him get to you.

- For whatever reason you actually began liking him. Under all that dickhead behavior and dirty jokes he was actually entertaining …or maybe just hot.

- Later in the day, the two of you went through each other’s stuff. He told you about his girlfriends and you sort of lost your interest in him. And yet, he seemed to rope you back in every time he flipped his stupidly gorgeous hair. It was a ...confusing detention.

- After a few hours of flirtation, you finally agreed to one date. He didn’t really have a plan when the two of you met up but once you told him you’d never been to one, he took you to a demolition derby.

- You were surprised by how much fun you had with him. You were also surprised by how okay you were with; lightly, making out with him, pushed against a chain link fence after the show was over.

- As much as you enjoyed the time you spent with him, you couldn’t get it out of your head that he had other girlfriends. The idea of him going out after the two of you parted ways and fucking some other chick after kissing you, well, it made you sick. And so, you began to actively ignore and avoid him.

- He wasn’t a fan of your silent treatment. He’d tasted you, gotten so close to winning you over, and you’d pulled the rug out from under him for seemingly no reason at all. It riles him up, makes him think you’re completely insane and yet, he can’t just let you go and be the crazy bitch that you apparently are. He has to have you.

- Meanwhile, you trying to ignore how you feel about him just seems to make it worse. So now, the two of you can’t stop thinking about the kiss you shared and how much you actually want to be together.

- Finally, after a chunk of time spent trying to distance yourself as much as possible, the loudspeaker comes on during one of your classes.

“Good afternoon Shermer High School~ this is John Bender coming to tell all of you that there is little lady out there by the name of Y/n Y/l/n who is your favorite assholes girlfriend. From now on, anyone who so much as looks at her will get their teeth kicked in by yours truly. Have a nice day.” Beep.

- You immediately felt the urge to melt into the floor as the entire class turned to stare at you. Finally, you just got up and dashed out of the classroom, on the prowl for the jackass who didn’t know when to quit.

- He’s halfway across the school when you find him, lazily walking as though he’d done nothing wrong.

“What the hell is wrong with you!” You have to stop yourself from screaming the words.

“Has anyone ever told you that you look hot when you’re angry?” He asks, stopping a foot or so away from you.

“What are you trying to pull here Bender? Are you trying to make my life hell?”

“Could ask you the same thing,” he replies. “We go on a date, we kiss, we have a jolly good fucking time and then you ignore me. Now I’m sat here wondering what the fuck I did wrong, like I should even give a fuck about what you think of me.”

He stops for a moment before continuing. “Well for some reason, I do. And so I thought about it and I figured it was those girls that I was seeing. So I got rid of them. You want a steady little monogamous boyfriend? Fine. But that means you don’t touch other guys, you don’t even look at them. You’re mine now.”

- You take a minute to process what he said and try to cool off. The two of you stand there, looking at each other like you’re both waiting for the other to strike. Finally you open your mouth and give him a response.

“Fine. I’m yours. But I’m gone the minute you try to play me for a fool.”

“Wouldn’t even dream of it baby.” He grins.

- Constant pda. He loves showing off that you’re his and getting that sweet, sweet physical contact.

- Messy kisses on the cheek from him. It’s usually when he’s being a sarcastic ass but you can’t help but love it anyway.

- He requires a lot of attention. If you don’t give it to him he’s bound to do something stupid to get it.

- He’s so surprised by your innocent affection. He doesn’t know how to react when you just brush his hair from his face or hug him. What are you trying to do? Why did you do that? ...Why does he like it so much?

-You’ll snuggle into his side while watching a movie and he’ll just stiffen up with his arms held away from himself trying to figure out what you’re doing. (Kind of like when a kid hugs the big tough guy of a film.) He gets better at it later in the relationship but it’s still a bit awkward at times. Just rest assured that he does; in fact, like it.

- His hands are almost always on either your waist, hips or ass. Depends on his mood and the situation. Contrary to popular belief, he isn’t a total asshole and respects that different places call for different grips.

- With that in mind, he’s a pretty sexual person. Hickeys, groping, smacking your butt; you name it and he’s doing it.

- Making out ...a lot. His tongue is basically roommates with yours at this point.

- Rough and passionate kisses. I mean, teeth clashing, lip biting, moan inducing kisses. If you didn’t like him as much as you do, his kisses would probably be enough to convince you to stay.

- Playing with his hair. You aren’t allowed to braid it so don’t even ask.

- So many sexual innuendos and jokes. He is; in general, a horny little bastard man, so expect him to be sexual with you.

- He is constantly smirking at and trying to get you flustered.

- He’s a cocky little shit but he makes it look attractive; most of the time.

- Most of his compliments consist of him calling you hot and other less than romantic names.

- Compliments fuel him so expect him to act tough and do tricks to try and impress you.

- Stupid dancing in the privacy of your own home or his. You’re usually blaring the radio or his mixtapes.

- When he’s at your house, he’s usually wearing much comfier clothing; things he would never actually wear to school like sweaters and sweatpants. He looks surprisingly ...cute in them.

- Sometimes, he can get genuinely sweet and thoughtful, even if he refuses to admit it.

- He carries you on his shoulder a lot, usually slapping your butt or holding you by it when he’s carrying you around. 

- He sneaks into your room through your window a lot; sometimes when he just wants to see you and sometimes when he just has to get away from home.

- Definitely has had your name tattooed on him at some point; probably even gives it to himself at home or something equally dangerous and slightly stupid.

- If it wasnt for that, you would probably feel like he doesn’t know your real name; what with the amount of pet names he gives you on a day to day basis.

- He shows you off all the time. He’s so proud that he managed to snag a girl like you and actually have you fall for him. He rubs it in everyone’s face that the ‘delinquent’ got such a hot girlfriend.

- He feels like such a badass with you under his arm while he smokes. The two of you will sit in the back of the school, his arm wrapped around you and you curled up into his side while he lights up a cigarette. 

- He probably steals gifts for you, even if you tell him not to. He’ll say he bought it but deep down you kind of know he just swiped it from a shop. It’s the thought that counts right? 

- Both of you wearing mismatched earrings with the other wearing the second of the two pairs.

- It’s a huge turn on when you wear his clothes. He can’t help but stop and stare wide eyed as you come out wearing his shirt or one of his jackets; especially if there little underneath.

- Wearing his jackets. They always have a very distinct Bender-like smell: faint hints of gasoline, cigarettes and cheap cologne or maybe even your own perfume.

- He would never really admit it, but whenever he’s at your house or messing around with your bag, he sprays himself or his car with a little of your perfume. It always comforts him in a way he can’t really explain. You’ve caught him maybe once or twice but you always think he’s just dicking around with your stuff while he’s bored.

- He gets clingy sometimes but a lot of the time, he’s just annoyingly nonchalant. It’s usually all an act, pretending like he doesn’t care means he doesn’t get hurt; at least not in the eyes of other people. Thats all that matters to him; that he stays being the delinquent who doesn’t give a shit about anything. 

“ Yeah sure, whatever. Do what you want. I don’t care.” Newsflash: he cares a lot.

- You know him a lot better than he thinks you do so a lot of his actions don’t bother you any more. You know the reason behind them so you can understand why he does what he does and try to work around or through them. 

- His parents are probably never home but when they are, he never takes you to his house. He doesn’t really think that they’d try something with you there but he wants to make sure there’s never even a chance that something could happen. The truth is, he’s sort of embarrassed that he “let’s” his father beat on him.

-You definitely try to persuade him to tell somebody about his home life, but he doesn’t think anyone would believe him (like everyone else) and makes you drop the subject pretty early in the conversation.

- Occasionally, you’ll go hang out with him in detention but you’ve also managed to keep him out of most of the trouble he tries to get himself into. Sure, you let him have his fun, but he isn’t in detention everyday now; you would never see him if you let him do all the shit he wanted to.

- You’ve also gotten him to stop fucking around with random people; for the most part. You explain to him that it really isn’t fun or funny to watch him bully and ridicule people who don’t or can’t fight back.

- He’s sorta insecure. He often wonders why you would want to date him of all people, especially if you come from a good family. He thinks of himself as the dirtbag of the school so it really just doesn’t make sense that someone like you (Someone who he thinks could quite possibly be perfect) would want him.

- Your parents hate him of course; mostly because of his reputation and the fact that they’ve seen him kiss the everloving shit out of you in front of the school.

- You make sure he knows that you’ll always be there. He’ll brush it off but he likes that you actually give a shit about him. Your words will stick with him and he’ll find himself thinking about them late at night, feeling comforted at the idea.

- You patch him up after his father hurts him, both physically and emotionally. If he needs you to clean him up, you’ll do it. If he just needs to sit with you in silence for a while; you’ll do that too. Whatever will make him feel alright.

- He has trouble being completely open with you and sharing his feelings. He’s very closed off, having built up a wall over the years. You let him take it down when he thinks he’s ready to; you don’t want to try to break it down and end up chasing him away. You know that deep down, he’s really just scared of letting people in and getting hurt more than he already has been.

- It takes a while for him to fully trust you but when he does, it’s worth the time you spent trying to get him to.

- He’s a pretty jealous and possessive guy. He doesn’t have much but he has you and that means a lot to him so anyone who tries to take you away from him is in for an ass kicking. Plus, it’s just common knowledge that you don’t try to mess with Bender.

- He’s seen firsthand how terrible people can be so he’s sort of intent on making sure you aren’t treated the same way he is. His parents may not hold the same sentiment but he would never let someone hurt the person he loves.

- Fights are usually loud and filled with curse words and name calling. He definitely storms off, either in the middle of it or towards the end when things aren’t exactly over but slightly calmed down from the full blown war you were having.

- To him, he can ignore you but the instant you do the same, he’s pissed off. Before you decide to ignore him, you’ll probably try and get him to talk to you but he’ll just give you the silent treatment. That’s when you finally give up and do the same, instantly turning the tables.

- No ones ever really put him in his place like that. They lash out, yell at him, maybe even hit him; but they never give him a taste of his own medicine. After a while of you ignoring him, he starts to do everything in his power to make you talk to him, even if he’s still pissed. He hates it, seeing you play his game; maybe even playing it better than him.

- He doesn’t necessarily apologize, he just; usually willingly, forgets which one of you actually started it and what you were fighting about in the first place. Or, if he does remember what you were fighting about, he sort of resolves it, explaining why there’s no reason for either of you to be upset with each other/why you don’t have to be angry with him.

- He doesn’t say he loves you but you know he does from the way he acts. He never treats anyone quite like he treats you and you can tell there’s something different in his gaze whenever he looks at or talks about you.

- He thinks you’ll leave him at some point so he always tries to make the most of your time together. You always reassure him that he’s not getting rid of you that easily which brings a little smile to his face. 

“Even if you did leave me, you’d never get over me. I’d spare you the pain and take you back, you know? I’m not cruel.”

“Gee thanks babe.”

“No problem, sweetheart.”