As a treat for all of you who have already jumped onto this blog's bandwagon, I'm going to go ahead and induct two players into the Butts and Brooms Hall of Fame.ย These two inaugural inductees possess two of the most prominent posteriors in the entire game:ย August "Danger" Lรผhrs (USC) and Sarah Kneiling (LSU).
Now, I have to say that I take great pride in inducting August into the HoF, as I've been personally responsible for whipping and molding his butt into shape--figuratively and literally--for the past season and a half.ย Granted, it was already in great shape when he arrived as a freshman (everything is bigger in Texas after all), but I'd like to think that I had a hand in pushing it to superstardom.ย If you haven't heard by now, the World Cup was August's coming out party.ย But, it wasn't a result of his ability to score at will even on a bum leg (pun partially intended)...it was because of the thin, skimpy red booty shorts that he wore over his spandex leggings.ย The New York weather was cold, but August made all the ladies in attendance hot.ย He even inspired some of them to start a "sexual frustration" blog in his honor.
But, years before August ever donned his famous shorts and spandex, Sarah was bringing new meaning to the phrase, "Southern hospitality."ย A distraction to photographers and players alike, no one has ever seen Sarah play quidditch in shorts that conform to a high school dress code and lived to tell the tale.ย It's been rumored that Sarah was only put on Team USA for the same reason NFL teams are signing option quarterbacks: to surprise rival teams with sets that they have never seen before.ย In the NFL, these are option sets; at the Olympic Expo, they were a set of female buns.ย Quite simply, Sarah Kneiling is to Butts and Brooms what Jerry West is to the NBA: The Logo.
Sarah and August, in recognition of your inspiring quidditch players both present and future, welcome to the Hall of Fame.