#barf spaceballs

watched spaceballs for the first time last night (space movie streak is up to 3 now) and gotta say if you haven't seen it you are missing out on some of the dumbest fucking peak cinema ever. also young bill pullman playing a literal space cowboy... waiter waiter! another one please

Spaceballs: the incorrect quotes (Heros addition, I might make a villains one)

Dot : Is this your plan B? 

Vespa: Technically, this is plan P. 

Dot : Plan P? Is there a plan M? 

Vespa: Yes, but I marry Lone Starr in plan M. 

Lone Starr: I like plan M.

                                ━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━

Vespa: I am going to need you to swear- 

Lone Starr: Fuck. 

Vespa: 

Vespa: ...swear as in promise.

                                ━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━

Lone Starr: God is no longer with us, I’ll take over.

                                ━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━

Prince Valium : It’s too early in the morning for this. 

*sent at 11:57 AM*

                                ━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━

Barf: Vespa you can’t move in with Lone Starr. 

Vespa: Why not? 

Barf: Well, um, how are you going to feel when he sees you without any makeup? 

Vespa: I’m not wearing makeup right now. 

Barf: Holy crap, you’re beautiful.

                                ━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━

Vespa: I just ended a five year relationship. 

Lone Starr: Oh no, are you okay? 

Vespa: It's okay, it wasn't mine.

                                ━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━

Lone Starr: *sees someone doing something stupid* 

Lone Starr: What an idiot. 

Lone Starr: *realizes it's Barf* 

Lone Starr: Wait, that's MY idiot!

                                ━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━

Vespa: What are your three best qualities? 

Lone Starr: I’m hot, I have soft hair, and sometimes I cry because I love my friends.

                                ━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━

Lone Starr: That's it, I'm cutting off the internet! 

Dot: No, please don't! I have a family to feed! 

Lone Starr: 

Lone Starr: What? 

Dot: I need to feed my Neopets!

                                ━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━◦○◦━

Barf: There are three ways to handle a difficult situation. The right way, the wrong way, and the Lone Starr way. 

Vespa: Isn't that the wrong way? 

Barf: Yes, but it's faster.

"let me know when you're going to post this so I can fire up the puppygirl batsignal"