#axprompt

Nerves were building in Tandy as they waited for Cessily to show up to their dorm room. They had texted her asking to come over. Tyrone was in class right then for the next couple hours, which would give them time alone to talk. They had already given him more specifics regarding the future, even crying on his shoulder at one point. Their hope was they wouldn’t ending up crying with the other woman. While they didn’t plan on telling her details about their father, they worried about their reaction to who they had been with in the future. They couldn’t keep it to themselves, though. There was a knock on the door, and they jumped from their place on their bed. Rushing to the door, they opened it with a tense smile. “Hey there,” they greeted, before stepping out of the way. “Welcome to my tiny home. Feel free to ignore the mess.”

Cessily couldn’t deny she was nervous about seeing Tandy for the first time since their little excursion into the future but that was no reason to not make an effort. Her future self had been far too modest in her clothing selection for her liking so she was making the most of the revealing and tight fitting items she found in her closet. She had already added a subtle wave to her vivid red hair - which was the only thing she could really change about her appearance as her silver complexion made wearing makeup impossible. A pair of ripped denim shorts and a plain cream top which showed off her midriff were hastily thrown on and she grabbed a jacket on the way out so the outfit didn’t quite scream ‘bed me’. Arriving at Tandy’s address she steadied her nerve and knocked on the door, flashing a huge silver smile as it swung open to reveal the blonde. “Hey gorgeous,” she purred as her silver eyes did their customary roam up and down Tandy’s figure. “Mess? Why would I be looking at the mess when I can look at you instead?” She teased though it was just a tiny bit forced. Her gaze did take in the surroundings and she smirked as she saw the mess that had been mentioned. Cessily wasn’t normally one for sentiment but as her silver eyes met Tandy’s she found herself saying, “it’s really good to see you.”

Any doubt that Tandy wasn’t in the present faded with the sight of Cessily. She truly hadn’t realized how different her style was in the future, until she was reminded of how she dressed now. The sight of her midriff alone caused her stomach to do backflips. Her breath caught in her throat, and her face warmed, wondering for probably the dozenth time how the gorgeous woman could be interested in her. She blinked out of her daze at Cess greeting her, and her body heated as her eyes glanced down at her. She was in shorts and a tank top, along with gray knee high socks, with a sloppy ponytail on top. “You’re the gorgeous one by the looks of it,” she replied with a bite of her lip. Her smile became less anxiety filled, and more genuine at her next remark. She closed the door as she came inside. A skip in her heartbeat arose at Cess’ words, while it also filled her with worry. What if this was how she ended up losing her? “It’s really good to see you, too.” She stepped forward, taking her hand and squeezing it. After a moment, though, she decided that wasn’t enough for her, and moved closer and wrapped her arms around her. She buried her face in her neck and held on tight. “I missed you. This.”

”Not from where I'm standing,” the silver girl purred in reply. Tansy’s outfit caused her to take a second long look and Cessily’s imagination began to run wild with images of knee high socks and Tandy in a full schoolgirl outfit. She forced the image to the back of her mind, thinking such things would do her no good if she was about to get dumped. Her worrying increased as her shiny hand was squeezed, was that all she was going to get? Relief filled her soon after as Tandy pressed their bodies together and Cessily allowed herself a sigh of relief - she wasn't getting dumped. Her arm snaked around the blonde’s waist and she held her tightly, pulling them even closer together. “I missed you too beautiful. I missed us.” She let out a nervous chuckle, “I thought I'd be leaving here single.” It felt strange using the word single but it felt good to have aired her fear. Her shimmering silver hand rose to the back of Tandy’s head and she slowly removed the tie holding their hair in a ponytail. Once their hair fell she ran her silver fingers through it, remembering how much Tandy liked that. She leaned down and kissed the top of Tandy’s head and asked softly “are you ok?”

The familiarity of Cessily’s flirting and endless charm comforted and eased Tandy more, at least. Their blush was there to stay from the moment the silver woman stepped into the room. They relaxed into her body more as her arms came around them, breathing in her scent and holding on even tighter. When they heard what her worry had been, they drew their face back to meet her eyes. “You won’t be, Cess.” They hoped she wouldn’t be, but it depended on how she felt about what they told them. Their head arched back as her ponytail was freed, before pressing their body further against Cess’. They shut their eyes from the kiss to their forehead, and released a shuddery sigh at the question. “A lot of the future...bothered me,” they admitted quietly, slowly opening their eyes to look at her again. “It’s stressing me out. Especially this one thing I want to tell you cause I want to be honest. And it might not even matter to you or it will, but I don’t want to keep it to myself.” Their fingers brushed through the red hair while they paused. “I...wasn’t exactly single in the future. Apparently, I was dating someone for a long time. It became on and off, but...I know this person already.”

Cessily couldn't stop her hand sliding under Tandy’s top to rest on her back, craving the feeling of her warm skin on her fingers. Her silver features turned into a big smile when she had confirmation she wouldn't be leaving single but she could tell there was more to come so she continued her soothing strokes through blonde hair. Despite seeing Tandy struggle to talk about her concerns she couldn't help her silver lip curling into a lop sided smirk. “The green haired girl? Apparently I have rather unkind names for her.” She pulled Tandy in closer, squeezing her tight. “I dunno if you cheated or if I was dumped but I didn't take it well. I rebounded so hard I got knocked up by Eva’s brother who I haven't even met yet. Apparently we were happy… until he died. My rather eagle eyed daughter told me how you'd turn up upset sometimes and I'd cheer you up by watching horror films all night.” She grinned cheekily, “I guess that means we did a lot of screaming.” She sighed. “So yeah, I know I was second best but I also know a rather smart Aussie chick once told me the future is never set. Nothing we saw or had is set in stone.” She gulped and blinked rapidly, suddenly feeling a rush of emotion that she hadn't expected. “If you… y’know… wanna go after her or whatever… I get it, I won't get in the way or anything if that's what you want. I just… well let's just say I'm not done with you yet if you wanna stick with me.” She tried to smile confidently but her worry was still present behind her silver eyes.

Tandy shivered at Cessily’s fingers against her bare back. It was a welcome distraction from the serious discussion they were having; it reminded her they were still together. Her body tensed up a bit at the mention of Lorna. “Yeah. Lorna Dane. Also known as Polaris.” Also known as ‘my grinch’ in the future. She bit down on her lower lip as she listened to Cess talked about what happened to them. Her chest grew tighter the more she heard, unable to stop the guilt that built up in her. “That’s something Lorna told me, too. That it’s only a future.” It didn’t lessen her stress that it was the future that would happen. She blinked in confusion at what the silver woman last spoke. “Cess...No. Never,” she promised with wide eyes. “She’s a friend. That’s it. I don’t want her like that.” She never could, not when she knew what it led to. “It destroyed me to know we weren’t together. It hurts to know...that me in the future hurts you so badly. I’m sorry.” She wasn’t sure why she was apologizing for something she hadn’t done yet or ever, but it came out anyway. “I’m...I’m falling for you, Cessily. I was expecting you to want to be done with me after finding out how everything turns out.” A lump formed in her throat, before a thought crossed her mind. “Your daughter...You could never have her, if we stayed together,” she murmured. “Being with me and not rebounding...means you won’t have her.” She glanced away for a few moments. “That’s like asking you to choose between me and your future daughter.”

Cessily noticed Tandy tense up and tried her best to keep her features soft and impassive but she couldn't keep the contempt from her voice as she spoke. Any mention of the Brotherhood made her instantly think of Eva laying lifeless in hospital. “Yeah I know her. Future queen bitch of the Brotherhood.” Wanting to lighten the mood after her outburst she smirked at the stunning blonde before her. “Guess bad girls are your type, gorgeous,” she purred. Cessily had seen enough films to know dwelling on a future that was never guaranteed was a bad thing. “We get to write a whole new future now. Just know what could happen makes our decisions different, which makes that future gone already. Even if it's just a minor change.” She raised a shimmering silver hand and caressed Tandy’s cheek softly with her finger. “How about we focus on the here and now and let whatever's to come sort itself out?” The silver girl felt her heart skip as Tandy confessed to falling for her, she wanted to say the same thing as she felt the same way but expressing her emotions was one of her biggest downfalls. “I'll never be done with you beautiful. Even after you hurt me I wasn't done in the future.” Her silver lips opened and closed several times but words refused to come out. “This is all new to me, I gotta say I like this falling thing. It feels… special.” She knew it was lame but it was the best she could manage. She hoped Tandy understood she was trying. Hearing Tandy talk about her having to choose actually made her smile, probably not the reaction Tandy was expecting. “Not necessarily.” Placing a finger under Tandy’s chin she lifted her head so their gaze met once more. “The future taught me this perfect specimen of a body can carry a child and still be hot as hell after, but I also found out Dee and Eva were having a baby, that was theirs. If our mothering instinct takes over we could always do the same.”

The name Cessily used on Lorna didn’t sit particularly right with Tandy. They didn’t exactly want to defend the Brotherhood, but they also didn’t want to ignore the insult thrown at their friend. “She’s...She’s just doing what she thinks is right. I can respect that,” they replied with a sheepish shrug. Her next remark did tug a smile onto their lips. “I suppose they are, never thought they’d be my type.” They listened to her talk about how they could create a whole new future, and tried to believe her, that nothing was set in place. “You’re right,” they murmured, leaning into the touch and closing their eyes. Her reassurance calmed them, even if it was only slightly. They needed that right then. Their eyes opened again at her speaking again, chest tightening up again at the idea of hurting the silver woman. “And I obviously wasn’t done with you either. You always had me coming back.” They couldn’t imagine their life without Cessily in it now, which, at least, in the future, she had still been apart of it. Somewhat. They watched her try to get something out, before they smiled softly. “It does. It really does.” The way they felt around her was almost indescribable. Her smile in response to their worries about her having to make a choice confounded the blonde. Why wasn’t she as worried about this as Tandy was? They let their head be tilted up, and let her words sink in. “We could...We could have kids of our own,” they mumbled. Their face heated up after they spoke. “I’d probably be a horrible mother,” they mused, half joking and half serious as they thought of their own mother. They feared repeating history. “You...You’d be amazing. And totally dotting, I bet, but act like you’re not,” they teased, leaning over and kissing the corner of her mouth. Letting their foreheads touch, they stayed quiet for a few moments. “You know how to make me feel better, Cess. Like, not, fake better, but genuinely feel better. You--You don’t judge me for how I feel. Or play them off.” They bit down on their lip. “I’m still new to someone being like that with me. Caring and shit. Which sounds pathetic. I just want you to know it makes me feel safe with you.”

"I get that," Cessily replied solemnly, "it's nothing personal. I just can't agree with an organisation that hurts innocent individuals to further their goals. It just rubs me up the wrong way, y'know?" Eva's story of being attacked by Mastermind was still vivid in her mind and she felt a flare of anger every time she thought of it but that wasn't what this meeting was about and Cessily was keen to change the subject. She wiggled her eyebrows flirtatiously, "I'll have to be a bad girl for you more often, see how crazy I can drive you." Cessily couldn't resist a gentle chuckle and flashed a silvery smile. "Then we'll never be done with each other. No matter what gets thrown at us." She leaned forward and kissed Tandy's forehead, really wanting to kiss the blonde properly but not feeling like it was a good time to stop the serious conversation. The future was never something she dwelled on, always one to live in the moment, sometimes to her own expense. "Yeah, we could," she cooed softly, "and hush, you'd be amazing. The caring, listening one to contrast my doting tough love. But... let's not get ahead of ourselves." She smiled supportively and nodded as she listened and her eyes were locked into Tandy's as she spoke, her silver fingers gliding through the sweet spot of Tandy's hair. "I'll do everything I can to make you feel good, beautiful. I might need a nudge in the right direction every now and then but how you feel is important to me. I care about you, and how you feel, a lot. And that definitely doesn't sound pathetic. I get it, I really do. I'll keep you as safe as I can. I promise." She simply couldn't resist any longer and whispered a soft "c'mere," as she leaned in close, pressing her lips onto Tandy's gently at first but increasing the pressure and passion behind it. She released a soft pleasure filled sigh but didn't break the kiss.

There was no denying what Cessily had said about the Brotherhood. Tandy wasn’t naive to various acts the organization had done that she didn’t approve of at all, especially after being on the receiving end of one of those unjustified attacks. But she believed Lorna wouldn’t let Mastermind continue being apart of the Brotherhood once that happened. “Gonna get my heart racing, then, Cess? Get my body hot all over?” she half teased, half challenged. “No matter what gets thrown at us,” she repeated in a promise, releasing a breath of relief as her forehead was kissed, with a surge of affection rushing into her chest. It was nice to slow down for a few minutes, and talk out what she was feeling. It was also incredibly terrifying for the blonde to be vulnerable like this. “You give me way too much credit, I would probably be too freaked out to even pick up a baby, let alone raise one. And right, just kinda cute to think about.” Would Cessily still believe she’d be a good parent, if she knew the parenting Tandy had grown up with, the habits she developed? She couldn’t dwell on the idea because soon the other’s chilled silver fingers were brushing through her hair, bring her mind back to reality. “I trust you, Cess. And I feel comfortable enough to tell you, y’know, if something’s wrong. I just...I want to make you feel good, too, be as good of a girlfriend as you are to me.” Her face froze in shock at her own word. “I--We hadn’t discussed it yet, but...That’s what we are, right? Girlfriends?” It sounded accurate, but more than that it felt right. Her heart missed a beat as the silver woman began to lean in close, and she closed her eyes before the cool lips even touched hers. A gasp came from her, forgetting how good her mouth felt, moving hers back eagerly. She threaded her fingers through her red hair, keeping up with the uptick in pace.

Cessily couldn't stop her excited grin spreading even further at Tandy’s teasing challenge. A challenge she most definitely accepted. “Oh gorgeous,” she purred, “my goal is always to get your heart racing and get your body as hot all over as I can.” To prove her point she lowered her arm and caressed her perfectly smooth silver fingers over the gap of bare skin showing between Tandy’s sexy socks and shorts. Her hand rose slightly to tuck her fingers under the hem of the shorts as she leaned in close to whisper in Tandy’s ear. “How am I doing so far?” With an encouraging smile Cessily repeated again “no matter what” as proof she meant it. Her free hand found its way to Tandy’s cheek, her silver thumb rubbing across it gently, supportively. “I'd trust you to pick up my baby. And I'd count on you to raise it. I don't exactly have the best role models so I'll need all the help I can get.” She chuckled softly. “Our kids would be criminally cute so it's probably good it's just an idea.” Had her silver complexion allowed it she would have been blushing furiously and for once in her life she would have made no effort to hide it. “You make me feel amazing, every time I see you it’s… Exhilarating. I've… I've never felt like this with anyone before.” Her smile slipped into her lop sided smirk at Tandy’s slip but she was thrilled it had happened, it meant she wouldn't have to awkwardly raise the subject as she thought she might. She grinned brightly. “Girlfriends. Yeah, we're definitely girlfriends.” Her silver eyes returned to Tandy’s wanting her sincerity to be perfectly clear with what she said next. “Secret girlfriends. For as long as you need us to be. Who gets told and when is up to you, I don't want you to feel rushed or pressured and I promise to be on my best behaviour in public with you.” She laughed, “yeah I know that doesn't mean much but still…” Feeling their fingers in her hair caused her to release another gentle moan and she lifted Tandy’s top enough for the bare skin on their midriffs were touching. She broke the kiss just long enough to purr. “I can't wait to see you in only those socks.” Her lips locked back onto Tandy’s as she kissed her girlfriend deeply - making sure their first kiss as officially girlfriends would be one they both would remember.

The repetitive beeps, whines and whirs from Eva’s medical equipment were oddly hypnotic and Steven didn’t realise he was drifting off to sleep as his eyes fluttered closed and his head rolled forward. After a few moments his head started to loll to the side and he woke up with a start, glancing around in a slight panic due to being disorientated. He recognised the room, the surroundings and the situation all too clearly and glanced at the screens and monitors that were the only sign of life for his younger sister. He had no idea what any of the graphs or digits meant, he only knew that they hadn’t changed. Out of the corner of his eye he spotted movement by the door and rose to greet the new guests, rubbing his sleepy eyes as he did so.

Nadia slipped quietly in the room. “I’m sorry; I hope I didn’t wake you,” she said to Steven. She’d barely seen him---barely had time even to see Eva---and she was already feeling awkward about it. “I was going to bring you some food, but I fell asleep with it in the oven. Um, has anything changed?” Nadia walked over to the hospital bed and lowered the railing so she could sit next to her comatose girlfriend, who she still wanted to call her wife. She gently ran her fingers along Eva’s arm, aching to lay next to her and hold her, but Steven deserved her attention.

“Not at all, mate,” Steven replied with a smile, genuinely pleased to see her, “was just resting my eyes is all.” His expression turned forlorn and he shook his head somberly. “No change at all,” his voice was barely a whisper. He managed a very small chuckle and smiled appreciatively. “You getting sleep is far more important than food for me, ‘sides I think I’m finally getting a taste for the gunk they serve upstairs.” Wanting to give the two girls a moment alone he shifted himself to the corner of the room and busied himself with checking his phone. He had of course informed his and Eva’s mother of the situation but he, unlike Eva, had long given up on any form of concern being shown by the woman for her only daughter so he was unsurprised to find still no response on his phone. He had so many questions and knew Dee would be able to answer most if not all of them so he perched himself gently beside her. “Dee… What happened?”

“I don’t need much sleep,” Nadia insisted. “My healing handles the physical effects for a while; it’s just advantageous for mental functions. You shouldn’t have to be getting used to that ‘gunk’!” Although her ability to read body language deteriorated with lack of sleep, she recognized that Steven was giving her a moment. She took the opportunity to kiss Eva’s forehead, and run her fingers through Eva’s wavy hair while she whispered apologies for her absence and promised that when she woke up they’d spend time doing something fun to make up for it a little. She struggled to think of examples because of the fatigue, but then the thought of her tiredness made her remember something. “I had a nice dream once,” she murmured. “We went to Central Park with Alma...it was autumn, and we went on the carousel twice. I haven’t been on a carousel yet, and I don’t think I realized I wanted to go on one until I dreamed about it. I wonder if you’ve been on one. You need to wake up soon so you can tell me, Eva. We took Alma’s picture next to the Beethoven statue and went on a horse-drawn carriage ride together, and then we had a picnic. Do you think we should do that? Wake up and tell me what we should bring on the picnic, Evee. I’ll make hot apple cider for sure, but what do you want to eat on our picnic?” She quieted when Steven sat next to her, and she turned her attention to him. How was she supposed to answer that question? “She was attacked. By a telepath who calls himself Mastermind. He was trying to force her to use her powers to send him back in time so he could change history. She fought back, even as he was trying to break her mind so he could have control of it.” Nadia lifted Eva’s hand so she could hold it. “My courageous, strong Eva,” she added, giving her hand a squeeze. “A latent aspect of her mutation activated. Maybe Mastermind caused it, maybe it activated as a defense against him; it’s hard to say. It...instead of moving objects or people, she moved minds. Since we ended up in the future instead of the past like Mastermind wanted, I assume it was Eva’s subconscious that took us there rather than Mastermind’s strongarming. Ten years into the future.”

“Everyone needs sleep, mate,” Steven countered feeling a lot like he was back in his home country with a little sister insisting she could stay up later than she actually could. But this situation was far more serious than that one had been. “Even if it’s just for a little, it helps keep everything ticking as it should.” Attempting to lighten the mood just a little he added, “I hear the gunk here is actually better than some places in Harlem, so I’m not complaining.” Having nothing to focus on with regard to his phone, he couldn’t help overhearing the whispers and promises and the story of the dream. He felt an icy grip taking hold of his heart and a lump rising in his throat. Blinking rapidly didn’t quite stop a single tear escaping and rolling down his cheek but he wiped it away quickly. He was struck by the realisation that he didn’t know if Eva had ever been on a carousel either and agreed with the sentiment that Eva should wake up soon and tell them.   “Attacked!?” He couldn’t stop the outburst when he heard his baby sister had been actively sought out and attacked. “I hope this Mastermind ain’t still breathing,” he seethed but then got his temper back under control and listened to Dee, hanging on every word. He shook his head forlornly and looked around Dee for a moment to look at Eva - at least she looked peaceful. “It all makes sense now,” he said in barely more than a whisper. “The docs say her injuries are like she’s been hit really hard on the head but there no external evidence of it, because she was literally hit inside her head. She’s always been brave, and strong in ways people don’t tend to see. She’s a tough cookie, always has been. She fought through that attack bravely and she’ll be fighting through this too, she’ll get through, I know it.”   He didn’t pretend to understand mutations or the fact they could evolve and change or latent aspects could activate. He just accepted it as fact, he’d seen and heard enough evidence to never have to doubt it. “The future? But you were still here, partly anyway. I saw you once and it was like you were a zombie, you didn’t even recognise me. You were hardly functioning, just going through the motions.” He took a moment to process what he had heard and then asked a different question. “Ten years… How different was it?”

“I know,” Nadia acknowledged. It didn’t convince her to go take a nap, but the concern was appreciated. “As far as I know, he is. I don’t know if the attack was orchestrated by the Brotherhood or if he was acting alone.” She hoped he was. She wanted to believe someone they considered a friend wouldn’t knowingly allow this to happen. “If anyone with green hair comes to visit, let me know right away.” Nadia nodded in agreement and gave Eva’s hand another squeeze. “You’re right. She’s stronger than she knows. I should get a hold of Jacen, have him take a look. He’s very good at psychic surgery, but I think Eva would hate knowing he was in her head. She punched him the last time he was in mine.” The memory made her laugh. “My brave fighter. You better wake up before I have to call him, Eva.” Nadia rubbed her neck and sighed. “Yes, physically, everyone who was moved to the future remained here. Most were unconscious, it seems. Maybe me being awake---sort of---had to do with my healing, or because of how often my mind’s been meddled with; maybe I got a teeny bit of immunity. But I don’t remember any of what my body was doing while my conscious mind was gone. I’m sorry for what that must have put you through, Steven.” Nadia smiled fondly at Eva and let her gaze drift to her bare ring finger. “It was very different. I don’t know how much is safe to talk about, because Eva says knowing too much about the potential future is dangerous.” She half expected to hear Eva make a joke about Darth Vader, but there was only the steady beeping of machines. “We were still together, Eva and I. Steven, you’re always nice to me, but it’s hard for me to discern if people genuinely like me. Do you think I’m enough for her? To marry her?”

“I might just have to change that,” Steven growled, though he had no idea how he would ever manage to get near a telepath nevermind win a fight with one. The threat made him feel that he was at least trying to make things right. “Green hair? Ok… Is this person someone to be worried about?” His eyebrow rose with the question, if the green haired person had anything to do with Eva’s current state they would find it very hard to get anywhere near her. Steven couldn’t help a soft chuckle as well, the laughter felt good but was still tinged with sadness. “I heard about that incident, I’ve met the chap once but it was very briefly so I don’t really have an opinion and what I have heard is… shall we say biased?” He nodded towards Eva’s motionless form, he knew very well she wasn’t a fan of Jacen at all. He laughed again softly. “That’s a new one, I haven’t tried threatening her but it’s definitely worth a shot.” His gaze was fixed on his sister’s face - did her eyelid just twitch slightly, or did he imagine it?  A few more seconds staring and he put it down to his imagination.   He listened once more to Dee’s explanation, which again made perfect sense and he waved off her apology with a smile. “No dramas, I was just worried but… but I couldn’t leave here to make sure you were ok. I know you would never have left her on the floor had you been your normal self, it’s how I knew for sure there was something really wrong.” The loving look Dee cast over Eva made him smile. He had seen that look before, many times and often going both ways, Eva never hid her adoration for Dee and he loved that about them. After a nod and another soft chuckle he spoke again. “Yes, I have received that particular lecture, enthusiastically delivered with many a Star Wars comparison dropped in for reference.” His features turned sad and he stared for a moment at Eva’s face. “I’d love to hear it again though.” In truth he would simply love to hear his sister’s voice, he didn’t really care what it was saying or what language it was using as long as she was awake and speaking.   Dee’s question surprised him, but joining the dots between the ten year jump into the future and the fact they were still together he worked out the pair were married. “You are a very likable person, I think it would be hard for someone not to like you. You are absolutely enough for her. The way you are together, what you do for each other during both good and bad times. Everything you’ve been through and yet here you are holding each other up. To be honest, it actually doesn’t matter what I think, only you know how you feel.” He smiled warmly, his biggest smile since this whole awful situation had begun. “But if this is some roundabout way of asking me for permission because she doesn’t have a father, then you definitely have my blessing. I know she’ll say yes and I don’t need adventures in the future to see that. But I also know she’ll probably ask you what took you so long.”

Nadia assumed Steven was smart enough to only be making idle threats, so she let it slide without comment. “No, she doesn’t have any reason to hurt Eva, and I don’t think they’d send her if they did. We’re not close, but we were classmates briefly, and even if she doesn’t consider me a friend, we’ve always had an understanding, I think. I just don’t want her around Eva until I know if she knew Mastermind’s intentions. If she did, then we have a problem. If not...we still have a problem, but I’m not going to start a fight with one of the few people who can easily incapacitate me.” She realized only after the rambling that her explanation was probably more worrying than reassuring. “What you heard may have been biased, but it was probably true. He’s done some very bad things, and some very good things, too, but it doesn’t necessarily make him more likable.” Nadia’s brows shot up in shock. “Wait, I---I left her on the floor? I, I know it was hardly me, but---oh, I’m so sorry, Eva...” Her distress began to ease as Steven reacted positively to her question. She didn’t think she deserved such praise, but she’d rather receive praise than scorn. “I do know how I feel. I love her completely, and I always want to be with her. I just worry that… I know it will be complicated. She will age normally, and I will only look the slightest bit older a decade from now. Every year the disparity will increase, not just how we look but how we are treated. Eventually there will be awkward questions and pressure to pretend we’re something other than what we are. She will experience stages of life that I will not be able to relate to and go through with her the way a wife should. I know I will always love her, and she will always love me, at least in a way. But I don’t want her to feel pressured to stay with me as her life goes on. I don’t want to hold her back.” Nadia sniffled. It simply wasn’t fair. “But I know, I know that she was so happy when she realized we were married in the future. She knew right away that she took my last name and didn’t hyphenate it with hers, so I know she’s thought about it in our time. I know it’s what she wants, and I know that when I saw how happy it made her, I knew I wanted to take that risk.” She kept glancing down at Eva’s hand in hers and imagining it with an engagement ring. “I think I need to talk to Logan, though. He’s the only person I know who may have gone through this dilemma, and I need to be sure---but you have eased my mind.” Nadia couldn’t stifle her yawn. Forming coherent sentences took so much energy that she didn’t have to spare. “I couldn’t bear to put a wedge between you two. Thank you.”

Steven looked down at his hands which were balled into fists and took a deep calming breath. Jumping in fists first had always been his way but as he'd got older he had learn to back away from fights where he was outmatched. Plus, he had no proof that Mastermind was responsible for Eva’s current state. What Nadia said about the potentially visiting green haired girl didn’t ease his feelings of uneasiness but he trusted her judgement and would go along with whatever Nadia suggested. As hard as it was for him to admit, she knew what was best for Eva far better than he did now. “A chap from the police offered to increase security on the room if we thought it was needed. D’ya think that’s something we should do in case this girl comes knocking?” His hand found it’s way to her shoulder and he squeezed it reassuringly. “Hey, it’s not your fault. It wasn’t you and she’ll know that. You’d never have left her if things had been normal, but it was as far from normal as ya could get.” His features split into a knowing smile and he nodded at each of her points, understanding where the worries were coming from. “Anything that’s worth doing is normally hard or complicated, mate. That’s what makes it worth it.” His gaze fell back on sister’s face, she looked like she was peacefully sleeping and he suddenly wondered if she could hear or understand what was being said around her. “Y’know, it’s been, what, six years since she left and she doesn’t really look that much different. Maybe she’ll keep her youthful looks for longer than you think and you’ll have more time to prepare for those awkward questions. But you’re absolutely right, she has thought about it. She mentioned it to me once and she said the same thing you just did, is it fair to tie you to someone who can’t share your whole life. But it is what she wants. She loves you so much and … well, she’s always saying how she can’t live without ya.” He nodded again. “Talking to someone who knows how it feels is probably a good idea,” he chuckled softly as a memory stirred, “isn’t Logan the one Eva was terrified of?” He noticed the attempt at stifling a yawn and stood to move around her, lifting tubes and wires up and out of the way and tucking some down the side of the bed to keep them secure but still freeing up space. “Not much chance of that,” he said lightly as he continued to work, “I just do what she tells me. She’s definitely the boss.” Satisfied with the space he had cleared he gave Nadia a gentle nudge. “Lay down, have a cuddle, and a nap if you like. She’ll appreciate it.” He raised a hand to stop the objection he was sure was coming. “My sister, my rules. Come on, just for a bit. Try and relax.”

Jubilee  wasn't exactly in the best of moods. She felt like nothing was making any sense to her, Eva was in a coma, and her two best friends were going through the worst of times. Since her return to the present time, Jubilee had one thing on her mind: her future son. It had served as a distraction of sorts. She didn't have control over finding considering it would be years until she adopted him. So she decided to do some detective work on someone she at least had met once: Matt. Unfortunately, her search didn't come back with positive results. Matthew was really Ashton and he was married. This meant that Ashton couldn't have possibly have been the man she agrees to marry in the future. Her head was spinning. Nothing made sense. She had pushed Clint’s sudden disappearance to the back of her mind blaming it on her rotten luck when it came to matters of the heart. As she made her way down in her building's elevator, she was sure to offer a small smile to any incoming citizens. She was always so good at hiding her true feelings.  And just when she felt she was clear to make her way home, her heart stopped at the sight before her. It was like she had seen a ghost. Nothing could have prepared her for this. She struggled to find the proper words, not one making sense in her head. Jubilee was angry. She was confused. She was in shock. “What are you doing here?” 

Clint being back in New York felt so alien to him. It used to be home but now it just felt cold and unwelcoming. He had spent the last months trying to piece back together what was let of his shattered personality. Clint hadn’t wanted to leave everything behind but shield had gave him no other choice. He had his mild controlled by some unknown reason left the avenger with very little choices, he could have stayed or leave till everything had calmed down. He had hurt a lot of people and he knew that. He had almost killed his fellow teammates and there was no way he could have stayed. The guilt that was eating away at him inside his head was nothing compared to if he had actually gone killed someone. Guilt was now part of the long list of reasons why he was stood outside of the J Crew building. Out of all the people he had hurt, knowing he had broken the promises he had made to Jubilee. He shook his head trying to clear his thoughts. Why was he there? Clint crossed his arms tighter, he couldn’t meet her eyes. “Because I owe you an explanation.” He owed her a lot more then that and he knew it. 

Jubilee stood frozen in front the ghost from her recent past. She should say something else. She should scream. She should wake up from this nightmare. Jubilee gripped the strap on her messenger bag, brown eyes burning into Clint. He looked so….worn. “I don't need an explanation. I'm fine really.” She had convinced herself that his abandonment didn't affect her and that it never would. The less she gave into her feelings the better oh man did seeing him bring back some memories.  “It's fine you're busy being a hero and this was just whatever it was.” Good. She was doing good. “Now if you excuse me, I have somewhere I need to be.” 

Clint had to shook his head at her words. He was far from being the hero everyone thought he was. “No I wasn’t.” His blue eyes looking up to her before she walked away. “I’m not that anymore.” He frowned slightly letting his arms fall to his sides. “I can’t be that anymore.” He didn’t want to be. That life had cost him his happiness for so many years. He had lost everything and everyone he cared about for it and he was done. He wasn’t going back this time. “I’ve done some terrible things but why I left had to be the worse.” His breathing was uneven and how he was still holding himself together he would never understand.

Jubilee could keep the facade up longer wanting to truly dismiss the man before her. Clint would serve as just another reminder of how things weren't going well. She had grown used to this by now. They come unto her life, they promise her the world, they plan futures, they leave. Rinse, lather, repeat.  Same old shit.  Different day. So why was she letting him talk? It was me more than just the fact that she wasn't an asshole. Jubilee felt something. A tug at her heart. A pull that wouldn't let her cuss him out and go on her way. In was in his eyes.  The very ones she claimed as her favorite. It was in his defeated tone. How could she leave when he sounded like that? And suddenly she lost her poker face. Her features melted into something softer and she walked up to him, inches apart. “What did they do to you?” Assuming there was a “they”, Jubilee was open to hearing him out.  “Let's talk in my office.” She added in a whispered tone before leading him upstairs. 

Clint. well this wasn’t what he had expected to happen, far from it actually. His whole body was just numb. Whoever had got into his head had pulled apart everything that had made him who he was or what he was. The man had been a stranger to himself for months. Maybe he shouldn’t have come back? When she moved closer everything in him was telling to move away, not because he didn’t want to be close to her again but because he didn’t trust himself with her. “They got inside my head.” He wasn’t sure who “they”was. Why was even bothering to hear him out? He didn’t have time to answer her being she was pulling him through the doors and upstairs.

Jubilee hurriedly made her way past the security desk,flashing her ID and taking Clint by the hand so she could better lead him. The faster she worked, the less she gave herself time to think. Thinking would prove to be dangerous especially when she wasn’t sure at first of what Clint’s intentions truly were. They had gotten into his head. Of course. Something had happened. How could she have been so obtuse? She was silent on the way up in the elevator and when they had reached her floor, Jubilee walked into the dark studio towards her office, opening the door for her….ex? boyfriend. Finally, she let out a breath she didn’t even know she was holding in and plopped down on the couch that decorated her space. Her eyes were glued to her carpet as she tried to take it all in and slowly, they flickered upwards to meet Clint’s. “You can sit down.” She felt her heart beating slightly faster--still confused by what this all meant. “What do you mean they got into your head? Are you going to be alright?” Even when she tried to come off as cold, she couldn’t quite pull it off. “Where did you go?” 

Clint When had he start shaking? His hand ran through his light brown hair. He wasn’t  okay. Not anymore. He was a shell of the person that he used to be. Silent seemed to be something that became a norm for him. He shook his head. Sitting meant being still and he didn’t want to stay still for too long because that meant thinking things other. “They pulled all me out and stuffed something else in.” He closed his eyes and shook his head. “I was was trapped in my own head. I could see what  was doing but…” He took a breath. “But I can’t stop it.” His eyes flicked open and over to her. “I’m still getting there. This is something I’m never going to be able to walk away from and I’ve been through some truly horrible things but nothing like this.” He started twisting his fingers into fits, it probably hurt but he didn’t feel it. “Whoever it was broke me, Jubilee. I…” He took a deep breath and looked at the floor. “I don’t know if there anyway back from that.” If there was a way. “As far away from here as I could get. They made me do things that I can’t forgive myself for.” He never would forgive himself for anything he did in the last few months 

Jubilee listened intently, her eyes never tearing away from him. He wasn’t lying. She had learned about observing others. She had learned about body language,about ticks, and mannerisms and everything about Clint screamed for help. What kind of person would she be if she made this about herself? If she made this about abandonment and not about being a decent human being? She wanted to reach out to him and hold him but she wasn’t sure how she’d be received. She had been on the other end of Clint’s PTSD before and she had learned what to do and what not to. Right now, she’d listen and wait for enough time to pass between them before she could say anything back. Jubilee knew the risks that came with being a hero. Or so she was learning since she was involved in heroics of her own. “Clint...listen to me.” She requested softly. “I will not allow you to have that kind of defeatist attitude. You’re Clint Barton and whatever was done to you, you’ll climb that obstacle. I know you. But with that said, I can tell that it has done a number on you and right now you need to focus on getting better. You need to focus on you. Whatever happened, it’s in the past and you’ll move towards a better future.” The <i>future</i>. The word made a shiver form down her spine and she stood up from the couch, taking cautious steps toward him. “Don’t give up, okay? There has to be a way. Someone at SHIELD has to have the training to help you. You need to embrace your resources. Now isn’t the time to push away the help. Alright?”

Clint listened to her. She was still one of the few people he did actually listen too. His PTSD had never been this bad before. The last time it had been this bad was when he was 20 and went deaf. What was the point in focusing when he had nothing worth focusing on? He had nothing again. He had lost everything that made him. He had lost her and that hurt him more then anything else. “I almost killed good innocent people, Jubilee.” He whispered before adding, “People who had families,people who love them, who would miss them. I couldn’t bring that home with me. I wouldn’t make you have to pick me up from that.” He normally never told her the triggers of his PTSD but maybe he should have done that instead of holding it inside. “I gave up when I let SHIELD send me away. I can’t go back there, it was apart of the agreement. Nick gets me out till everything calms and I leave SHIELD.” Maybe him telling her that would help her understand just how bad things was. “I’m trying.” That had to mean something didn’t it? That he was trying to get other this but it was hard when he was on his own. “Y’know I haven’t even been home yet.” Could he still call his apartment that now? He had been gone for so long. There was a dull laughed the passed his lips for a moment that was followed by him crossing his arms again. A long silence followed after that because what could he say? What could he possibly do? It was like she said it was in the pass now.  “I didn’t want to leave you but I was more scared of the fact that I could have hurt you or worse.” He knew that she had been through with Cole and he could have lived with himself knowing he had done something like that to her again. 

And that was when the sadness hit Jubilee. “Oh.” She replied as she carded her hand through her locks. He had been brainwashed. His mind had been messed around with. “I...I’m so sorry this happened to you. I know. Of course you’re trying. Don’t worry about that. I…” She shook her head. Where would she begin? “I don’t think we should talk about that right now. You leaving was terrible and I thought about awful things and then I pushed it to the back of my mind. I made it seem like it didn’t trouble me. If someone asked, I wouldn’t elaborate on it. It’s my defense mechanism. I’m sorry if it seems like you don’t mean anything to me. That’s far from the truth. I care about you and I want you to be alright. You need to go home, Clint. A shower, a meal, close your eyes and just let sleep come to you.” She took a deep breath, a few more steps towards him. “I’ll take you. I can make you something. Make sure you at least fall asleep. How does that sound? We can talk about this...us...all of this when you’re settled again.” How would she explain her glimpse of her future? A future that didn’t include him? 

Go home she made it sound so easy.Clint didn’t have the energy to even try to argue with her. Maybe going back to his apartment would be a good thing. He was hopping that it would be. “I know all of your defense mechanism. You’ve used most of them on me.” He just knew her to well. He knew that she should play with her hair when she was nervous. “You don’t have to be that.” He let his eyes go back to her brown ones and he saw that no matter how much he told her no or you don’t have too that she was going to help him home and stay with him no matter what. “There are still a few things I need to tell you.” He wanted to tell her everything because this time he could and not have to worry about losing his job because as far as he knew they didn’t want him back at all.

Jubilee let out a soft, almost quiet chuckle at his reply. She would be lying if she said she didn’t miss him but things were different now. At least that’s what the future told her. The confusion she felt when Clint’s eyes rested on hers made her sigh and she reached for his hand, pulling him gently towards her so they could sit together on the couch. “I’m listening,Clint. Go ahead.” She spoke softly and tried to sound as welcoming as possible. “And I’m not taking “no” for an answer. Unless of course you really do not want me to go with you. At least...call me in the morning so I know you’re alright. But before you decide, tell me what you need to say.” 

Clint settled down on the couch. Her hands were as soft as ever, he knew that wouldn't have changed. Clint had missed her laughter because it always seemed to brighten his mood no matter what. “The reason you couldn't find me was because I had to chance my name for a while.” He explained that part first. “Fury gave me my new identity, I had to go by Matt Simpson for a while, not the best name I know but they why even if you did look for me that you wouldn't have found me.” His face soften at that. “I know so I'm just going to agree with you because you are always right.” She was always right when it came to him. If the past few months had taught him anything it was how well he knew Jubilee and just now much he had missed her.

Jubilee kept one hand over Clint’s in a demonstration of support and encouragement. She was glad he had accepted to at least sit and took note of his comfort level rising a bit. “You had to change your identity because you were a threat when your mind had been taken over, right?” All of this might have seemed like some bologna story but truth of the matter, like the Cuckoos had told her, this type of occurrence shouldn’t be a surprise to her considering who she was and who she was dealing with. She lived in a time when things like power swaps and time travelling was possible and that meant that Clint’s story had plenty of truth to it.  She listened carefully, her heart skipping a beat at the mention of his new identity. “Wait...what?” She whispered, the feeling of confusion pouring over her once more. Matt Simpson. Matthew Simpson. The dog tags on her nightstand when she woke up that morning in the future had the initials ‘M’ and ‘S’. This couldn’t be a coincidence. She felt her mouth go dry, another small but nervous chuckle escaping her lips at his words. “So you hid for me? You didn’t want me to find you?” And then the guilt struck her once more. She had been so caught up in being angry. “I know why you did what you did, Clint. I...probably would have done the same.” She reached to caress his cheek with her knuckles. He didn’t look like himself and it all made sense to her now. “I’m sorry for judging you so heavily. I really am. And thank you for coming back to tell me the truth.” 

Clint just nodded. “I had a lot of people looking for me.” He wasn’t going to lie to her anymore because that had never helped before. “They gave me to choices stay and be locked up or leave till the dust settled and come back. I guess I choice the second one because it gave me time to clear my head.” That had helped a bit but he had missed home and Jubilee so much it hurt. He frowned a bit when she looked at him confused. Had he said something he shouldn’t have? “Have I said something wrong?” He had to ask her that. He knew he had missed a lot anyway. “Yeah and it’s was the worse choice  I made.” That really wasn’t a lie, he regretted leaving everyday. “You were just getting better from what happened with Cole and I didn’t want you to go through that again.” He sighed as her knuckles brushed his cheek. “Well that I’m used to people doing.” He chuckled ever so lightly. “It’s the least I could do after everything I’ve put you through.”   

Jubilee felt awful. She was out and about doing research on some guy who wasn’t even a for sure thing--a future that probably wasn’t close to reality when Clint was sitting in front of her pouring his heart out. “N-nno. Clint, no. You made the right choice. You did what you had to do. You did what you had to do so you didn’t end up hurting anyone and it was probably the best thing for you so that the news would have spread. You know that as soon as that information fell into the wrong hands, your name would have been all over the news. This could have been a lot worse and you did what any good person would have done. You did what a hero would have done.” She reassured him. “Thank you for that.” She sighed. “I told you when we first started to get to know each other that I had been in a couple of rocky relationships. My longest and the one where I had started planning a future with...well, he just got up and left. But before and after him, there were several that just ‘poofed’ on me. I started to think there was something really wrong with me.” She said half jokingly. “I lost a lot of my trust in romance or anyone with romantic intentions. The most recent, before you and I decided to try things out, was a mess and a half. Not that she’d call whatever occurred between her and Aiden a romance. Jubilee scowled at the thought. “I haven’t heard from any of them...not like I want to now and when you left, I pushed you into that group of people that just got sick of me or something. I’m not trying to be the victim here either. I’m no saint.” She shook her head. “But I shouldn’t have done that. I know you better and I should have had some faith in your return or inkling that you were out being a hero. I guess I thought it was safe to just forget you and I admit, that I got myself caught up in other things. There was work and taking care of Alma and just life ya know? And I was able to push all those thoughts aside. All the thoughts of Clint Barton. It’s like I conditioned myself to forget anyone that had the capacity to hurt me. But now you’re here and I don’t want to forget. And I don’t know if that makes me selfish or what but it’s the truth.” She sighed tiredly. “There’s a lot I need to tell you. I spent a good portion of the last month in the future. A few people did. I trust you with this information. And in the future I was sent to, I had a son. A beautiful little boy I adopted. I had named him Cole. I woke up in a home that wasn’t my current one. I lived in Brooklyn with a man who had been with me for many years and Cole even called him ‘dad’. His face, now that I think of it, seems blurred to me but it matched one of someone I had met before at fashion week. His name was Matthew. Matt Simpson.” She took a deep breath. “And he asked me to marry him the day before I had woken up in that future. He seemed so comforting. He felt like home but I didn’t even know this guy. When I got back to the ‘present’, I tried finding him and it turns out the man I met at fashion week is married and his name is Ashton. So, I was confused until you told me you took that name as an identity.” Jubilee tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “Clint, before you left, I told you I loved you and I do. It’s just been months since your disappearance and so much has changed around me. “You have always been the exception to the rule. You’ve been patient with me and kind and forgiving and appreciative.” She’d be an idiot to let him go. “And I think we should rebuild what we had instead of just picking things right up. If...if you’re my ‘Matt’...I can’t just let this go. I know that doesn’t sound definite but I want you to be okay and I want to be in your life. I think we should probably try all over again. See what happens from there…” Her eyes flickered up to catch his gaze. “This is a lot isn’t it?” Here he was telling her this awful story and she was basically telling him she thinks they end up living together and engaged in the future. This was a whirlwind of an evening already. 

But had Clint? he didn’t think he had in the last month. “I’ve still hurt the people I care about. Maybe not in the physically way but emotionally. I can’t tell which one is worse anymore. Please don’t thank me for doing any of this. If the new had got hold of this I would be in jail now, It would have made my brother right about me.” He knew about her past relationships and what had gone on with them. “I remember because  I told you that sometimes I might not always be able to be there but I want to chance that, I want to be here.” He listened to her words and it made his heart feel heavy, like it could just drop at any moment. “I’m not a hero Jub. I’ve always told you that because I know you never choose to listen to me when I say that.” He head started shaking at her next choice of words. “You’re not being selfish at all. You did what you had to do in order to protect yourself from your own pain. I get that Jubilee. I would have done the same thing” He nodded at her next words. “You know you can tell me anythin’ and I’d listen.” He would listen to anything she had to say even if she thought it was pointless because is wasn’t to him.  That was a lot of information to take in all at once. “You went to the future?” That would have been hard to believe if he didn’t have the job he did or well had now. He let out a long breath when she mentioned that she had an adopted son in the future. Funny thing being he had always told Natasha that he wanted to adopt a child in the future because he knew how hard it was to be put into care. He never told Jubilee that so her telling him that was strange. “I used to tell Natasha that one day I wanted to adopt a kid. I’ve been in care I know how scary it can be.” He met Jubilee’s eyes again. He brown eyes were always so soft. “I guess I can’t hide from you,huh?” That was small joke. He actually the first joke he had made in a while. He remember what she had told him before he left. “I told you that I loved you too and I still mean that. I’m not the same guy you knew a few months ago. I wouldn’t want to just pick up things like everything fine because let’s face it nothing okay at the moment.” He put his over hand over her’s and sighed a little. “I tried to let you go for your own good but I couldn’t do it, god help me I couldn’t. I’d like to try again and if at anytime you feel like stopping I’ll understand.” He keeped her to know that. He had to chuckled as she asked if it was a lot to take in. “Just a little bit.” He agreed. 

Jubilee felt a weight lifted off her chest as if she was unknowingly holding onto a grudge. Maybe deep down inside, she was. “We’re not going to fight over this because you know what I think about you and that topic.” She had always considered him a hero and had even often told him he was underappreciated for what he did. Clint was humble, sure but Jubilee wished he’d see his own worth. Maybe with time, that would change. Now with everything that had gone on with him, it was probably going to be a little more difficult but she wouldn’t lose out on hope. “As soon as I ended up back in 2016, my mind started doing somersaults. I had no time to think really. Not until now. There is a lot I discovered about not only mine but also the futures of people I care about. Coming back was a bit of a rude awakening. I found myself missing that life. I miss my son even though technically, I’ve never met him. A lot changed in my life when it came to me personally. I was no longer working at J Crew but I had made a name to myself. I was an independent but popular designer but I also dipped into other extracurriculars. So, this hero thing I’ve been trying? Yeaahhh...I’m still out saving the world. Among other things.” She’d tell him more a little later. “It has been a lot to take in. But the others are going through worst times.” She was starting to see how easy it was to talk to Clint. She had missed this more than anything. It was the friendship that had brought them together from the moment she asked to borrow his maple syrup at the diner. His revelation to her was something she didn’t know and wished she had shared with her before. He knew her parents had both passed away and that she had two adoptive ones, Nadia was also her adopted sister but he didn’t know the full story. “Wait...you were in foster care?” How could she have not known that important piece of the puzzle? “Clint, I was too. I...escaped actually. Lived on my own for a while--that part you knew. As I got older, I realized I wanted to have kids of my own but more importantly, I wanted to adopt. Nadia and I went to highschool together and when she had no one, my adopted parents took her in. I can’t imagine my life without her. Seeing that and seeing the importance of having parental figures, I made it a point that when I’m ready, I’d adopt.” She confessed. “And now that I have Alma living with me until things settle with Nadia and now that I’ve seen a piece of my future with a son of my own, I realize how much I really want that. Not now of course but definitely in the near future…” Jubilee offered him a small smile. “I’d like that. Slow and steady wins the race, right? And I thank you for coming to me because believe it or not, I haven’t really had that luck with anyone I’ve been with before. Your forwardness means a lot more than you think, Clint. So, thank you again.” She leaned in and kissed the corner of his lips. “It’s okay. You’re home now.” 

Clint was just listening to everything she was telling him. He was still playing catch up with everything that had happened in New York over the last few months. In a strange way her telling him everything she had was helping him to focus more. “I’m not going to start on the topic Jub” He agreed that was just who he was, he couldn’t see himself as the hero everyone else did. He hopped that one day he would be able to see what other did. “I knew you wouldn’t pack that in and I still want to help you with that in anyway I can.” He wasn't going to promise anything but he could try to help. “The first time I was put into care I was 4 year old and I remember my mom being heartbroken and promising she would get me back and she did for about 6 years. My dad was drunk and he took my mom out, the next thing me and Barney knew he had the police knocking on the door telling us our mom and dad are gone. We both got put back into care till I was 16 then I joined the army for a while.” He had already told Jubilee about the army. He couldn’t remember why he had been put into care the first time but all he could remember from it was being terrified of everyone around him because it wasn’t home. “I wanted to tell you about that Jub but I could never find the right time.” He knew she would understand that. “You and Nadia are like sisters? Who is Alma again?” He remembered Nadia telling him about Alma but that was awhile ago. “I just remember being in care and just wanting a family one day in the future. One I made for myself and I can honestly say you are the first women I’ve ever even consider possible starting one with but that was before everything happened.” He smiled a tiny bit and nodded. “Slow and steady is always the best way to go. Neither have I but you know that and you always understand why I haven’t. I’m going to try and open up more to you.” He might have froze a little when she moved forward and kiss him. “I’m starting to think it going to be.” 

Jubilee took a moment to reflect on everything they had both shared to each other and to truly appreciate Clint’s calm despite his own problems. He was so much stronger than he gave himself credit for. There was a mutual respect there that she cherished and would tell him someday. Now especially that he had been vulnerable to her and revealed such an important aspect of his life, Jubilee felt like this could grow into something truly special. Was it possible that the future she went into wasn’t completely solid but showed her glimpses? They were just snapshots and maybe Matt Simpson was really Clint Barton. Only time would tell, of course. “I’m sorry you went through that. We both had some past, huh? Strange how we could have had a different upbringing in a different time but still share similar experiences. Life's funny like that. And here we are meeting and facing the world together. If someone would have told me I’d be sitting in my office with Clint Barton, discussing not only our past but our future, I’d probably laugh.” She grinned. “Thank you again for sharing. I’ll never stop saying it. It’s so important to me. Alma…” Her lips widened. “She’s the most precious child I swear.  She is gifted like me and Nadia. She was raised in a troublesome home and on the verge of exploitation. She was going to be molded into a killer…” Jubilee shook her head. It wasn’t her story to tell but she told him enough so he’d understand. “I’m trying to give her the childhood she deserves. This is all new to Nadia so I’m taking over for a while. I’d love for you to meet her. Honestly, I’d love for you to grow close with my sister and parents. I think they’d love to have you around. And perhaps, meeting Alma, you’ll see if being a dad is what you truly want, you know?” Her heart almost melted at the thought of Clint being a father figure to someone. She remained close enough and smiled softly. “Good. We’ll get through this together.”

Clint was reflecting on everything. He had missed so much and he had so much more to learn about but for right now all he really cared about was what Jubilee had told him. He would always put her problems before his own ones . Her problems always seemed more important than his anyway. He was used to being this vulnerable with someone, letting his walls be fully down never end well but this time was different. He felt it was safe for him to talk about theses things with her. He knew he could trust her and that never had come easy to him. “I got over it pretty quickly. Joining the army is a great distraction.” That really wasn’t a lie or him it had helped him in ways. He had to smile at the way her face lit up when she spoke of Alma. “She sounds pretty special.” He thought about her question this would be a big step for him but he nodded. “I’d love to meet your family Jub. Sadly I’m not sure if you’ll ever meet Barney.  I wish you could have met him before.” He smiled at her. “I’d like that.” 

III.

Tandy shifted in the corner of the couch they found themselves sitting in within Nadia and Eva's home. Their fingers were curled around a strand of their hair, and their knee was bouncing without them even aware of it. They couldn't be blamed for being on edge, since learning what they had about their...activities. They had finally been forced to tell Tyrone what was going on, much to his disbelief. He did eventually believe that they weren't playing a complicated practical joke on him, and was ready to answer questions about themselves. Their first had been ​why​ they were possibly filming their father, and thankfully, their futureself hadn't kept the information from him. He hadn't known as much as they hoped, though, just that they were spying on their father for SHIELD for some reason after being apprehended one day. Apparently, they had informed him, but not gone into much detail besides the fact Alma and Lorna had been the ones to break them out of SHIELD. That was what had led them to Nadia's home, hoping for more information without needing to see Lorna, because of some other information they had learned. "Thank you, by the way, for letting me over," they called out to Nadia in the kitchen who was grabbing them tea. "I hope I'm not interrupting anything."

Lorna It was about time to see Alma. The pictures made her wish she could remember all the moments they had shared. She was so proud of Alma, she couldn't even put it in words. It was weird seeing her all grown up, but it was just as weird seeing herself aged ten years older. Not that bad, she had to admit. She knew Alma was going to be with Nadia so she decided to stop by, not before telling some other members in the Brotherhood where she was going if they wanted to reach her. Then they told her something funny, about breaking Tandy out a second time. When asked to explain, they did and it made even less sense. What was Tandy doing being caught by SHIELD? It wasn’t something she wanted to focus on anyway. She was happy to pay Nadia and Alma a visit. She knocked on the door, a hat over her hair, she was beginning to realize why she had cut it shorter. Easier to hide all her green hair under a cap or beanie. Still, she had to be careful with her face as well, but she felt good that she was in the presence of Nadia. Safe, she might say.

“It’s no bother,” Nadia replied from the kitchen as she poured two glasses of lemonade, then added another on second thought. Alma would hear Tandy’s voice and be in the living room in no time. “I guess we usually have some kids around in the summers, but they’re all either taking classes or have been invited elsewhere. Eva’s teaching summer school during the week, but I’m not needed on a daily basis during the summer, so I’m glad you came by---any distraction from this absurdity is welcome.” As predicted, Nadia heard footsteps coming down the stairs in a rush, and as she returned to the living room with their drinks, she saw Alma bounce onto the couch next to Tandy and wrap her arms around her in a hug.

“Someone else?” Alma asked at the sound of the doorbell.

Nadia was beginning to adjust to the eery way she would hear one set of words, with echoes of others that Alma meant but didn’t say rippling around them, ringing like bells. (‘Are you expecting someone else? Who is it? Do you know who it is? I’ll get it; hang on---oh, is there extra sugar in my lemonade!?’) It was an entrancing sound, even without Alma using her full powers. “Uh, I wasn’t, I don’t know yet...no, there’s enough sugar in there already---I’m surprised your teeth haven’t rotted out, Bumblebee.”

Alma was too cheerful to fake a pout about the sugar; instead she laughed in reply as she went to the door. When she opened it, she clapped her hands in excitement. “Lorna!” (‘What brings you here? Want some lemonade? I’ll steal extra sugar for us. Tandy’s here!’)

"I can understand that, the need for a distraction," Tandy replied, hearing the footsteps coming down the stairs. She couldn't help her grin as she saw Alma, wrapping her arms back around her. "Good to see you, too," she told her. Her eyebrows raised as she heard her ask about someone else, catching the words her pseudo little sister didn't say. Who else would be here? She snorted at Nadia's talk of Alma's teeth rotting out from all the sugar, shaking her head in amusement at the faux pout she got in response of it. She ran her fingers through her hair as she went to get to get the door, still trying to figure out how she'd end up bring up the situation. That was when she heard Alma happily call out Lorna's name. Shit. She couldn't even hide or pretend not to be there because she heard Alma tell her she was there. As Lorna came into the room, she turned her head and gave a sheepish wave. "Hey," she mumbled out, glancing away quickly.

Lorna smiled at being greeted by Alma, but then snorted at what continued after that and then realized it was so weird hearing her voice like that and she looked confused for a moment there, but decided to shrug it off and not bring attention to it. That would be rude. “I came to see you, actually. And Nadia of course,” she motioned toward her, smiling in greeting. However, Tandy was not someone she was expecting and so she gave a small wave in her direction. “Hey,” she responded, slipping her hands into her pockets and turning back to the other girls. “Where’s this lemonade that needs sugar?” ​And does it have alcohol?​ She knew better than to ask that.

“Sorry,” Alma signed. It was easy to forget that ten years ago, Lorna had only heard her voice once. Whether they found it beautiful or eery, it took everyone some getting used to. “Really? I’m glad!” She exaggerated her facial expressions and mouthed the words to make it easier for Lorna to get the gist of what she was saying even if she didn’t recognize the signs. She looked between Lorna and Tandy, then pointed towards the kitchen to answer Lorna’s question about lemonade.

As Alma walked to the kitchen, Nadia saw her sign ‘awkward’ and chuckled. “Well it’s good to see you,” Nadia said, and got up to give Lorna a quick hug. “I’m guessing I’m missing something though…?” It was a strange role swap to see Alma more in-the-know than she was, and she couldn't help but give Alma a suspicious side-eye as she returned with more (undoubtedly oversweetened) lemonade.

Lorna hugged Nadia back and then pulled back as she gave her a strange look. “What, no, why do you say that?” She gave a soft chuckle and then reached for the lemonade. Should she act like everything was normal? Tandy didn't know did she? Things had been weird, but maybe it was just Lorna putting her own thoughts onto Tandy. “This is good,” she commented about the lemonade, trying to push all that awkwardness away. “So, Alma, you already know we've got some memory loss, but Nadia's showed me some pictures and you have to fill me in at least. What's our relationship like? Especially with the whole Brotherhood stuff.” She said before taking another sip of the lemonade.

Tandy knew their mind was wandering again because of Lorna's presence. The last time they had seen each other was awkward, to say the least. Was that because neither knew if the other had been sent forward with them? Or had the green haired woman's nervousness come from the fact they knew they were together in the future already? They snorted at Lorna's response to Nadia, somehow making it more obvious Dee was missing something. Getting up, they went over to grab their own lemonade, sipping at it and avoiding eye contact. "We should tell each other what we know or found out, too, get us all on the same page," they remarked, glancing up at the three. "We wouldn't anyone not telling each other anything, anyway," they added.

“Told you so!” Alma signed to Nadia, vindicated in her belief that lemonade could always use a little more sugar. She sucked her bottom lip while she tried to think of how best to explain it all, and gave Nadia a look that meant she would need to interpret for her. “It’s good, but complicated,” she signed. “Um, not long after the time you last remember, when it became clear the registration law would pass… I had been living with Aunt JuJu for a while, and things were stable, and I was finally growing, physically. I was ‘failure to thrive’ before that. Then my dad tried to take me back… without telling Jubilee, just took me in the middle of the night. He thought I might tell, so he kept me asleep, and I woke up in one of his hideouts, and he said it wasn’t safe for me to go back, and he took my iPad away so I couldn’t contact anyone, and I couldn’t listen to music or make it, so I didn’t cope well and he had to control me a lot. We think it was a combination of the stress and my recent growth spurt that activated my secondary mutation. Aunt JuJu got me back, but Aunt Nadia and Aunt Eva were fighting, and I was still scared, so I couldn’t get my powers under control. It got really bad, and Auntie Dee called you and asked if you knew anyone who might be able to help, since you were closer than the Institute, and if registration started being enforced, the Brotherhood wouldn’t turn me in. My new powers were more dangerous than the first, so it would have been bad if the government knew. She didn’t like the Brotherhood knowing but you guys were able to help me until my powers were a little less unstable, and Auntie Dee and Eva worked things out, and we moved to Connecticut where I wouldn’t have to register, and could get help at Xavier’s. You looked out for me whenever I was in New York, though. If you didn’t make me feel safe, I would have been too scared to start going back to New York to take precollege classes at Juilliard.” She looked at Lorna and Tandy, then laughed. “Also, you two dated. It was gross. And sometimes you broke up, and it was awkward. And sometimes you weren’t together but still were definitely having sex, and it was gross and awkward.”

Nadia’s voice was shaky as she interpreted what Alma said. She had been told most of the story, but it didn’t make it easier to hear. Having to say the last part aloud, though, made Nadia go from tears of sadness to tears of laughter. “Speaking of awkward!” she muttered when she finally caught her breath.

As Lorna listened to Alma’s story, she grew upset at what had happened. Registration had passed? It couldn't be. Inhaling deeply, she shook her head ready to speak on about what had happened to Alma but then---“Alright, alright! It wasn't that funny.” She did not want to bring attention to her and Tandy’s obviously private relationship issues and yet there it was all out in the open. “Clearly our future selves are a little ridiculous. I mean---Tandy and I are friends.” Removing her hat, she ran her hand through her hair before putting it back on, her cheeks a little pink from embarrassment. It was shame she didn't know she had. Wouldn't anyone be a little embarrassed at finding out you ended up in a relationship with your friend? “Really happy to hear how well you've done since then Alma. I don't know if I say it often now, but I'm really proud of you.” She also couldn't help but feel pride that she managed to make Alma feel safe enough to go to school. “I guess it works out that you were a little nosy.” She said with a smirk, looking over in Tandy’s direction before quickly turning back to Alma before she got a chance to notice. Apparently it was no secret. Literally everyone in the future knew that wasn't affected with memory loss. ​Jesus​.

While listening to Alma explain what she knew, Tandy felt her stomach drop at the fact her father had tried to take her from Jubilee. It made her even more sick to learn he had taken away any means she had to communicate. What a fucker he was. She was glad everything was alright now, then, and that they were somewhere where she didn't have to register. Her cheeks filled with heat at the last bit that was more personal than the others, and also confirmed what she had wanted to be wrong about. "It really isn't," she said weakly, rubbing her forehead. How did they end up together? She'd never thought of her like ​that​. Okay, there was attraction there because of the play flirting they did, but she never would have have guessed they got together. Well, they weren't together right then. Apparently they were on and off. It didn't make them feel any better. "That explains why Ty gave me a funny look when I said I saw Cess the other night," she mumbled. Her cheeks turned a bit red as she smirked over at her, running her fingers through her hair after. "It makes more sense now, too, why you broke me out of jail, apparently." She turned toward Alma. "I'm still not sure why you helped, though, cause I don't think I'd want you involved in that."

"Thanks. You don't say it very often, but you show it,” Alma signed. Even though leading the Brotherhood usually kept Lorna away from her performances, there was almost always a ‘break a leg’ text or a little something delivered to her to let her know Lorna remembered. As Tandy started talking about the things that made sense now, Alma’s eyes widened in horror.

“You what?! Alma!” Nadia shrieked. The young woman she saw in front of her wasn’t a child, but in Nadia’s mind, she was a little girl. “I would hope you wouldn’t want her involved in that! How long ago was this?!”

Lorna was far too grateful for the change of topic, but had to wince at Nadia's reaction. Understandable, but she hoped Tandy didn't get her in too much trouble. “Whoa, whoa, Alma's a big girl now,” Lorna tried to calm things down, stepping closer to them all now, not wanting things to turn into an argument, especially not because of something Alma does in the future, Lorna would have liked that reaction to what Alma’s father did, but that didn’t happen. “Besides it happened like,” she looked at Alma then at Tandy before giving a shrug, “I dunno, couple of years ago?” How was Alma now? How old was she then? Not exactly the time to be working those things out.

Tandy scrunched up their face when they realized not everyone was aware of what Lorna and Tandy had gotten Alma involved in. Their eyes swept over to Lorna as she tried to calm Nadia down, which didn't appear to be going well. "It only happened once," they weakly added, while meeting Lorna's gaze. "And we're all still alive, so, it couldn't have been ​that​ bad." Okay, that was probably a bad thing to say right then. "I'm not really sure why I was arrested, which is part of the reason I'm here. Ty only said he knew I was arrested because it happened mid phone call. Then he filled Lorna in, and next thing he knew, Lorna had gotten me back home." They decided not to add the part about how when he had come over the next morning that Lorna was still there.

“A big girl? Really, Lorna, that’s how you’re justifying it? She was a teenager. Just because we were both criminals at that age doesn’t mean it’s okay.” Nadia realized it didn’t make sense to yell at Lorna for something she did in the future, but the thought of Alma in danger, whether in 2016 or 2023, was upsetting. “I’m sorry,” she added briskly. “But I really don’t think you should try to justify your future self’s actions in this instance.” She was trying to control her emotions, but Nadia couldn’t prevent the glare at Tandy. “Being alive is a poor indicator of how bad something is. Alma’s lived through a lot of terrible things.”

Alma pulled her knees up to her chest and hugged her legs. “It wasn’t like that,” she mumbled almost silently. “I didn’t kill anyone, and nobody forced me do it. I wanted to help. I needed Tandy.” She still felt that she did, but she had no idea where her Tandy was, if she was switched and ten years in the past, or if she was gone forever. She wanted to believe it would all work out, but when had things ever gone smoothly before? “These versions of them haven’t done anything yet. They might never.” Freshly reminded that it wasn’t her Lorna and Tandy she was visiting with, she stopped speaking aloud and signed ‘sorry’ to Lorna.

Lorna wasn’t used to at being yelled at like this. Her father scolded her before, but he never yelled at her and she had seen her fault then. Here she didn’t and probably never would. That didn’t mean she didn’t felt bad for getting Nadia upset, though. “There’s no reason to argue over something that happened years ago. Who knows, maybe your future self would have understood. We’re all pretty different people now than we were then.”

Tandy glanced down somewhat shamefully as Nadia yelled. It was sorta a nice feeling, though, to have someone who was like a parental figure give her a harsh talking to. She felt like shit and guilty, but also cared about. Her chest ached when she heard Alma say she needed her. She looked towards her. "I'm sorry I wasn't there. I'm sorry I got you into this." She moved her eyes in Lorna's direction. "Obviously we've changed, we're dating. Or not dating. Apparently," she muttered, rubbing her hand over her face. "I--The only reason I found out about this is cause I guess soon after you guys broke me out I--began to do something. And I don't know why."

Alma looked at Tandy and smiled halfheartedly, reaching for her hand to squeeze. She wanted to reassure her that it wasn't her fault, but the tension in the air caused her to struggle for words to sign. If she vocalized, she knew she could get her point across, but she feared her powers would only make everyone more agitated. As her fears played in her mind, her face began to tingle, and she felt herself starting to slip away. It felt nice and warm...there was a gentle breeze, and she would have opened her eyes to see what the pocket dimension she was falling into looked like, had she not suddenly remembered that it was a distressing sight to those in her dimension, and focused on reining in her powers.

Nadia looked at her niece nervously, whose eyelids had begun to flutter, and was no longer responding to her surroundings. A moment after Nadia rushed over, though, Alma started to look around and reached a shaking hand towards her lemonade. Any intent to argue disappeared. Of course Alma would insist on helping Lorna get Tandy out of prison; they had come to her aid when Alma's powers and her life were out of control, when the few seconds of terror Nadia just experienced from watching Alma's control slip lasted days on end. Nadia realized that in Alma's position, she would have done the same thing.

Although Nadia was still fixated on making sure Alma was alright, Alma was working to be engaged with the present. She pointed to Tandy and raised her eyebrows to ask what it was she had started to do after being broken out.

Lorna frowned when Nadia rushed over, wondering what had happened with her, but no more than a moment later, she seemed fine. "I think there's a lot of things we do now that we can't understand why," Lorna muttered, crossing her arms, but glancing over at Tandy, wondering what she had meant by that. She didn't mean to turn the attention over to Tandy, but it was better than having attention on her and to have Nadia angry with them. Maybe she was still upset, but it seemed it had more or less died down for now, hopefully whatever Tandy said next wouldn't reignite it.

Tandy didn't know what had happened with Alma after she reached for their hand to squeeze it, which they squeezed back. They watched in concern, only breathing a sigh of relief once she appeared alright again. Their eyes fell to Lorna again at her muttering. They had to look away again after the question of ​what​ they began doing. "I'm spying on a guy running a cult that calls himself Lord of Light for SHIELD," they unhappily informed. They would leave out the part that man was their father. "But--Ty says we're not working for SHIELD, that I'm just doing this for them...Alma, do you know what I had been arrested for? Or had one of us mentioned something about why?"

Alma frowned. She knew, but struggled for words. She had gotten her powers under control, but more anxiety threatened to shake it. The quick shift from Nadia’s anger to fear---had her slip been that noticeable? Just unexpected. Nadia didn’t have nearly a decade of experience with the new ability; Lorna and Tandy didn’t even know what those abilities were. Did they know Nadia was reacting to that? Would she have to explain? Alma looked around, trying to find the source of a voice she was hearing that didn’t belong to anyone present. She slapped her hands over her ears, which didn’t help, as usual. Knowing that no one with her would understand what was happening or know what she needed only made her feel worse. Alma jumped up and ran from the living room, up the stairs, and into her bedroom.

Nadia heard the door slam and looked helplessly in the direction of the stairs, then at Tandy. “I’m sorry; she’s been having some trouble with her newer powers, all the stress, you know?” she sighed. “I wish I knew what she needed.” Just then, her phone vibrated, and when she looked at it, she saw it was from Alma. “She says you broke Lorna out of jail, Tandy, and you were caught on security footage. And you must have made a deal with SHIELD so you wouldn’t be in jail or hiding from authorities.” The phone vibrated again and Nadia smirked. “Which is probably a good thing, she says, because you make a bad criminal and should leave the edgy antihero thing to Polaris, FYI.”

Lorna took a step forward upon seeing Alma leave, wondering what had happened and if there was something they did that made her leave but then Nadia explained. It didn't make Lorna feel any better but she understood now. She felt bad they didn't know how to help her. They weren't their future selves. Sighing she returned her eyes to Nadia to listen only to look back to Tandy. “You were caught on the security tapes? What a rookie move,” she teased Tandy, giving a small grin. “We'll make sure to remember our roles for the future when we return.” If we return? Lorna wasn't sure about that but she didn't want to be stuck in this future. Despite chuckling it off she felt guilty at being the cause of Tandy's current misfortune and hoped Tandy didn't hold it against her.

“Polaris.”

The female voice sounded like an echo in the darkness, pulling Lorna out of a thick haziness, reaching for her in the muck.

“Polaris.”

This time it sounded urgent.

Lorna opened her eyes and sat up, taking a sharp gasp of breath upon doing so. Faces stared at her. Four concerned faces. Two she didn't quite recognize.

“Wha--”

“Those bastards must have hit you mid-flight before retreating. You took a bad tumble to the ground.”

“Here.”

She looked down at what was handed to her. It was her father’s helmet.

Lorna looked at the group. She recognized Mystique, she was the one speaking, and one other, Riptide, but the one handing her the helmet was a face she couldn't place.

“Where's my dad?” She mumbled, looking around. If this was a mission why wasn't he here?

The group exchanged glances as she started to get up. She looked down at her clothes. This wasn't something she had worn before. She stood upright immediately.

“What the-- what's going on, where's my father?”

“You hit your head. I guess there's some memory loss.”

Must be. She didn't even remember how she got here.

“Magneto is gone.”

“Gone?”

“Dead.”

Lorna's eyebrows raised. She saw him last night. That wasn't true. “What are you talking about? He's not---”

She pushed through the group, stumbling. Her head was reeling, probably from the fall, but she couldn’t remember even going out with the Brotherhood this late. The block looked like a damn war zone with broken windows and scorched ground. There were cars flipped over and exuding smoke. Streetlamps had been brought down and only one stood up nearby, giving whatever light it could. She kept walking and lurched forward as she tripped and gripped onto a newspaper stand---or what was left of it.

As she fell to the ground once more she took a newspaper with her. She turned it over to read it. On the front page it read, June 30th, 2026.

Holy shit.

Given how late it was, that must have been yesterday’s paper.

“Polaris.”

She looked up, the one that had originally wanted to hand her the helmet spoke up and he still held it in his hands. The other three stood behind him, faces still with concern.

Inwardly, she was panicking. How could she be missing years of her memory from one fall to the ground? She was missing so much and she was worried it wouldn't come back. Running a hand through her hair, she pulled her hand back at the touch of her hair. Much shorter than she remembered? What the hell was going on? How could she so vividly remember being on summer break her fourth year of college and not remember the yesterday of this year? Something was very very wrong. Her father was gone. Dead. She wanted to grieve, to cry, but she couldn't. Judging by the look on her team’s face, she couldn't let them know of her fear. They looked worried. Far more worried than they had ever before whenever Lorna took a hit for the team. They usually got her back on her feet and then turned to Magneto. But now, they were looking to her.

And she knew that look. It was the look she had seen many give her father. She was sure she looked at him the same way. Her father was a beacon of light in the darkness she had been pulled into from an early age. He gave Lorna a purpose. A reason to fight. And nothing else made her prouder to be his daughter than knowing he did that with everyone else.

No matter what people said of him, she saw him as a true hero, he didn't try to play nice with those that hated him. He knew what they were capable of if you were soft. Her father was unyielding and gave strength to those who followed him. He gave people a foundation to stand firm on and no matter how much the earth would shake and people would try to bring you down, that foundation would keep you from falling.

Getting to her feet, she let the newspaper slip through her fingers as she walked over and took the helmet, running fingers over the scuffed marks, ones she never saw her father have, but they didn’t look new, like they were caused by her fall. They were worn, aged. She brushed off any dirt with her hand. Looking up, she saw all eyes were still on her, waiting. By now, Mystique would have said something, she was the senior member... especially if her father was... gone. But she remained silent. They were all silent. They were awaiting orders.

Lorna put on the helmet.

  Alec asked me why I seemed to feel so much about the Hero’s Day gig earlier this month. He wanted to know why I put so much faith in them. My brother has always been and will always be in my memory as my hero. He did so much for me that they couldn’t have. But they, the X-Men, the Avengers.. they do so much for others that he couldn’t have. They face the world to protect it even when they get shat all over. They do what they must because they capable and it fulfills them. I want that for myself too. Something fulfilling, something that actually contributes to the world in a real way. I don’t want to just.. hide and keep my head down when I could be doing so much more with this special hell of a gift I’ve been given. That’s why I went after that boat, even if it’s why I’m sitting here in bed for days on end after scaring the shit out of some people with the hospital. So much has been taken from me, but one day I hope to be able to give back to the world so no one has to face the same horrors I have. The public heroes are great. They do amazing shit. They give to the world, to this city, to this horrific mess of a country I live in, even at the cost of themselves. They are capable and prepared.