#autistic bpd

it’s such a struggle being autistic and not being inclined to following a rule, including social and moral “rules” if i can’t find a reason for it and i struggle bc if i can’t figure out WHY it’s a rule, i can’t properly understand how to follow it, but i can’t ask bc then people will think i’m a freak for not inherently being against it ☹️

"Of the millions, I, too, was potentially everything at birth. I, too, was stunted, narrowed, warped, by my environment, my outcroppings of heredity. I, too, will find a set of beliefs, of standards to live by, yet the very satisfaction of finding them will be marred by the fact that I have reached the ultimate in shallow, two-dimensional living - a set of values." - Sylvia Plath