#austine

for @dragonagesapphicweek days 3 & 4: unrequited and reunion

orlesian warden commander/vivienne. is this anything

NOW HE LEFT ME HERE BY MYSELF WITH MY OWN THOUGHTS AND MY OWN SELF HATRED AND I HONESTLY JUST....I JUST CAN’T FUCKING DO THIS. I CAN’T HANDLE THIS. I’m gonna fucking kill myself.

My parents are going on a cruise with my sisters, I’ll be home in the house by myself. I’m going to do it then. Who gives a shit. Who is really going to fucking miss me? no one, I’ll answer that for you. NO ONE cares about me, NO ONE loves me, NO ONE really wants to take the time to know me or care about me or anything. Honestly.

Soylet Pony

idk man this whole relationship was a lie and i was vERY upset last night and I tried so hard, and i told him how much I cared about him but he didn’t want to hear it. and he said a lot of shitty things about every aspect of what makes me me–my weight, my scars, my tattoos, the way I dress, even the way i pose in selfies. he LITERALLY tore it all the fuck up man, like how shitty can you possibly be…….im pissed. i definitely know that im pissed. 

but my dad gave me a good long talk about being an adult and moving on and how i will find someone else if it’s meant to be and that I never have to think that I have to rely on someone to be happy, then he quoted rocky balboa and gave me like the best hug I’ve ever had and like man I am so happy that he was here for me when i needed it.

he couldn’t love me because I’m depressed and because of a lot of things that are just skin-deep and that fucking sucks. and we’re moving in different directions and going to different places….

it’s okay. I’m gonna get my degree, and I’m gonna be an artist and sell my book to a bunch of people. I am a published author and artist and I am smart, hot as hell, and have the biggest heart I know. anyone would be happy to date me.

i just can’t believe it was him…i trusted him so fucking much and he just…shat on it.

1.) started to not love me as much like a year and a half ago but didn’t tell me

2.) insulted my hair

3.) insulted my clothing style

4.) insulted my tattoos (which are my literal livelihood)

5.) said that my depression was unappealing and went on to say that he “he knows other depressed people who don’t act as depressed as me”????

6.) said he didn’t like my jacket (i have a keith haring jacket that i made BY HAND that I love more than anything)

7.) compared the scratches on my car to my ability to be responsible...

8.) insulted my cleanliness, as a rich white boy who has never had a real job.......insulting me, who has had a job since i was 16.......is in school.......and is trying to make it as an author.............

9.) when i told him i hope he feels bad about what he did to me he said he didn’t