We moved here with a 5 year plan exactly 5 years ago yesterday. Things have gone differently than our projected plan - sometimes much more interesting, sometimes much more difficult - and now we're in uncharted, unplanned territory of expat life/regular life. I used to think day-to-day adulting was fueled by making important decisions and determining your big ideals, but the older I get the more I realize life has a life of its own and you're better off just rolling with it and not focusing on the completing of a life plan or goal as much as you focus on the now. Focus on your "adjacent possible" and pursue a string of achievable micro-changes. Yes, having a direction for those is good, but the "life-plan" isn't my focus right now. I don't know where we'll live "long-term", what cultural identity we'll decide to raise a family in, and how long we'll be able to keep a lifestyle untethered to a "the big plan". Maybe in other seasons we'll want or need to set 5 or 10 year chapters again, but for now, I'm on the road just to be on it. I'll spell in mostly British English but still prefer words with Zs instead of Ss, speak with a muddled accent that strangers guess as Canadian, care deeply about American current affairs, cherish the understanding Australianisms, hate that we can't see our families more and be content with not knowing if these things will permanently or temporarily be part of my identity. Being a identified as a "foreigner" and feeling foreign for years on end (nearly 8 now) is hard, and maybe it's just been long enough now that the feeling has settled in and whatever we are - too American to be accepted as Australian and too interationally invested to feel fully identified with our home country - is our new normal. I actually don't hate it, and recently I've noticed and named this feeling as being settled to not fret over living a collage life without a finish line. I am here; I am now; I am content. --- I took this messing around with settings in our new-ish camera, but I like it, even if it does feel really literal. I am here; I am now; I am content. --- #selfportrait #aussieintegration (at Australia)