#atti's asks

i think cloke's down to earth mentality really suits charles for a number of reasons. i think that charles would really enjoy the whole "it's all chill everything's gonna work out" vibe that cloke would have, especially given charles is a character described to need a sort of childish reassurance. i think the fact that cloke is wholly unconcerned with things out of his control unlike henry and francis who are both deeply controlling individuals (and especially francis who has severe anxiety), charles would gravitate towards cloke's way of thinking more (coincidentally i think this is also why he finds such comfort in richard as a character).

i think their relationship is primarily casual hookups where charles will come over under the guise of "just wanting to smoke" (even though he fully can just buy his own weed) and they end up hooking up while both high. and while this isn't the healthiest thing, it's my own personal hc that cloke doesn't actually drink alone, and doesn't have alcohol in his dorm and really only drinks if he's partying (i think this is also an excellent parallel to abercaulay's hookups usually having one-sided intoxication). so i think, coincidentally, that while they pretty much are always high together, that charles does overall drink far less than when with the rest of the greek class !!

this actually i think also makes camilla and francis quite angry. not entirely in a jealousy sense, but in the sense that charles is clearly capable of drinking less but he won't do it for them, he'll do it for the company of another, even if they fail to recognize that he's just trading one addiction for another. and in line with charles' sexua; repression and his desire to be intoxicated to justify sleeping with men and absolve himself of the accountability, to go back to cloke being very laid back i think that unlike francis (who is canonically upset with the arrangement but keeps entertaining it) cloke just... accepts it.

cloke brings up a hookup and charles claims not to remember, and while it freaks cloke out at first, i think when he notices the pattern he just falls into the same mentality of "yeah of course. you were never here and neither was i and nothing happened" which comes easily to him partially because he's a drug dealer but also i think partially because he's likely had to look away from a ton of things being a child growing up in the film industry. and while toxic, for this reason charles keeps coming back. does the arrangement hurt cloke? probably. is he willing to just enjoy charles' company while he has it? also yes.

that's lowkey a lot of angst BUT i promise i think of good things for them i promise.

like cloke taking charles to the la brea tar pits, offering to take him to cali for spring break and planning a whole itinerary for him ughh

the idea of cloke taking charles to parties to get him to loosen up, i also ugh i think that charles has his room decorated similarly to camilla's (i think a lot of the twins' "shared" interests are primarily hers not his, but bcs she's his favorite person (in reference to bpd which i believe he has in canon, not just him liking her) he tries to align his interests to hers to keep some sort of connection between them), and i remember one time lee and i discussed a scene where charles visits cloke's dorm and tells him his room is cool, and cloke offers to help charles find second hand shops and places to get vintage posters and stuff so he can redecorate his room. like i think cloke is real into punk and alt stuff, and this is sort of a crossover with a rockstar au idea we talked about, i think charles would also like it if exposed to it, and who better than one cloke rayburn?

i also think cloke is quite outwardly charming in the way that charles is described to be in canon, and i think that charles getting a taste of his own medicine really throws him off his rhythm and sort of makes him want cloke BAD. like charles throwing around "doll" or "sugar" as a term of endearment but cloke hitting him with a casual "baby" and him getting FLUSTEREDDDDD

also one more angst thing i think that the fact that cloke is so loose with terms of endearment and compliments/flirtatiousness really puts into perspective for charles that he does not hear that from francis. like i remember us saying that cloke would definitely be like "i'm so lucky" or "i can't believe you're on top of me right now" which is cheesy, but he's fr in absolute awe of the fact that he gets to hook up with charles, and i think charles has absolutely never heard that from other people he's hooked up with, but especially not francis. i think he's the one who usually says stuff like that (which i pull in part from francis saying charles is so sweet on him when he comes over and it makes francis fall all over again), and while francis is justified in not wanting to be nice to him during hookups bcs their situationship is psychological torture, i think the idea that cloke is aware charles is in denial but is still so vocally appreciative of being able to have him at all really stresses charles out and scares him !! i think it scares him a lot !!

also. cloke tops. cloke tops and i think it's also infinitely funnier for charles to bottom and be like "well i'm not gay" like baby yes you are but as cloke rayburn would say "if you like it i love it"

i have more to say but. this is already a lot LMAO so if you have anything in specific you wanna ask do ask fr

edit: i LIED i have a couple more things to add.

i think during hookups charles despite bottoming is more in control, and rides cloke a lot or really any type of thing that puts him in control of the situation, and i think cloke eats that shit UP. this is inspired bythe fact that i think charles feels he has no control of his life (see: his implied history of sa with the church and the predatory nature of his relationship with francis, the feeling like he has to follow henry) and enjoys that cloke is so willing to let him take the wheel

14. i have so many pieces of media that have moved me so profoundly that it's really hard to choose one. i'm going to avoid using the obvious one here that we are all on this site for, and i think i'll go for my film of all time

moonlight (2016) dir. barry jenkins. that film genuinely changed my life. already it's such a beautiful coming of age film that i feel Black boys never get to have, and the fact that it so earnestly discusses the struggles of poverty, queerness, and Blackness and how they intersect, or sometimes clash with each other, is so important. especially myself being a queer latino, though it's not fully the same there is this feeling at times of feeling like you're betraying something by allowing yourself to be queer, just due to the expectations placed upon you by many people, sometimes including your own, for them as being Black boys and then men, for myself as being a girl in a Latino family. i haven't seen it in so long because it's absolutely heartbreaking, but despite that it's been my favorite film since i watched it in like ? idk maybe 2021 ? and i really need to watch it again soon. i recommend everyone watch it, genuinely.