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MEMO #596
A reminder to all field agents that Madripoor is still a red zone for operations. No new missions will be approved for the area, and any urgent matters will be passed to existing teams inside the country.
If you disregard this notice, and go anyway, you're on your own and SHIELD will disavow you should you be apprehended.
Cmdr Hill
Deputy Director
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MEMO #595
There are to be no duels in the Science Department over if the 't' is silent in 'often' or not. There are to be no arguments with co-workers as to if it is pronounced 'orphan' or not.
If is happens again I will send in the Hulkbusters to break it up regardless of who is involved, and authorize them to use tasers and tranquilizers. Then everyone will go to the cells, where you can argue all you like where no one can hear your screams.
MEMO #594
No one here is a little teapot, and singing that song around Agent Lissner is harassment. Lest anyone get the not-at-all bright idea to ask, he can and will cut you down to size.
Asking him about that, however, is also harassment.
MEMO #593
The very next agent to yawn at me during a briefing will soon learn the true meaning of 'dead tired,' and they will learn it as part of the Greenland Survey Team. It's a respect thing; at least try to stifle it. Cmdr Hill Deputy Director
MEMO #590
It is inappropriate to refer to Loki as 'Twilight Sparkle.' It is equally inappropriate to refer to Thor as 'Derpy,' Johnny Storm as 'Rainbow Dash,' or really anypony else.
It is likewise inadvisable, if not suicidal, to refer to the Director or myself as Princess Celestia or Nightmare Moon.
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MEMO #588
While I recognize that we are all spies, and trained to live under falsehoods and eat prevarication for breakfast, do not ever lie to myself or Director Fury when asked a question. We'll know, or we will find out. Our wrath is the stuff of legends, and scary stories to tell your fellow agents around the campfire during long stakeouts. If you were allowed campfires, which that reminds me you are not. Cmdr Hill Deputy Director
MEMO #587
Due to the unfortunate incident of the sandwich in the daytime, it is heartily recommended that all sandwiches made on SHIELD bases in the last week are destroyed.
Eat one at your own risk.
MEMO #585
All agents from areas currently in conflict or outright war with any other agents' nations are reminded that we leave politics and nationalities at home when we come to work.
We're all agents here; we're citizens of the world.
All agents are reminded that staging 'annexations' and/or 'coups' of anyone else's work-space is strictly prohibited, and no department may secede from SHIELD.
Agent Facchino Sub-Director, Human Resources
