#askdear

UH BECAUSE UH I REALLY LIKE STRAWS OKAY

xoxo 

p.s. i miss the random texts you sent me that made me laugh because you're a crazy person (a good crazy person?) 

You're amazing and I love your edits and you're great. I've been following you for what seems like forever, and you are a kind person. I love my little Russian. :p

Are you ready for this? Because this is going to be a long one. And emotional one. But then again, when aren't things between us emotional? Always in the good way of course. I...I miss you. I miss you a lot. And I know I've told you this, and I know you've told me you miss me too, but I miss you more than I've let on. I miss our inside jokes. Our long texts. Our long chats. I miss your voice and how adorable you sound. I miss our friendship. I miss watching things and relating them to you, like Lie To Me and Brothers & Sisters. I love you. I'll always love you. You were my best friend. You are the one person that I've managed to tell everything to. You are the person I trust. And I want you back in my life, I want to get back to how our friendship used to be, but I don't know how to get that way. I don't know how we ended up here. We drifted apart. It's like one moment we were attached at the hip, and the next we...we weren't. I miss being able to call you my best friend. Yeah. 

I hope you didn't screw this one up too.

Oh, you're gonna make me get all emotional and mushy on you now. You, you, YOU, you, sweet angel face baby cakes darling, not afraid to call people out on their shit, you. You've been one of the best friends that I have ever had. You have done so much for me, more than you have known. You've been there for when I needed someone to cry to. You've been there for me to rant to. You've been there for me to write my whole life story to, and you've never judge me at all. You try your best to make me smile when I need to. You're a bitch, but not in a bitch way at all, when you need to be. You're crazy. You're funny. You make me laugh 95% of the time, and we cry together because the charmings are such idiots. We have insiders, and we laugh at the randomest things. not only am i lucky to have you in my life, but i am lucky to be able to call you one of my closest friends. 

Stop playing victim. Grow the fuck up. Stop crying. You've hurt people just as much as people hurt you, and don't be blind and pretend that you don't. You're just as much at fault, or even more, than I am. Sulking does not fix things. Sitting in sadness does not fix things. You can put on a brave face for everyone else, you can say that everyone deserves love no matter who they are, yet you deny yourself of the same love. Get over it. Things don't get better by not doing anything. Shit happens. You get over it. You've survived. It could be worse. Remember that.