hey rott, love your cartman hot takes, do you also have any hot takes for kyle?
MAN DO I HAVE HOT TAKES FOR KYLE
Kyle has anger issues, look at both of his parents as examples: Gerald has blown up at Ike for his trolling bullshit and Shelia is from fucking Jersey. Whether or not Cartman would've antagonized him as much as he did he still would have a temper. He had anger issues in the first few seasons before Cartman was a bother at all and just LOVVED to pick on Eric and be a massive bully.
Tall Kyle canon. I just can't see him being short or the shortest out of all of them. Plus wouldn't it be hilarious if he hit a growth spurt and absolutely used that to his advantage when Eric tries to pull some shit??
While Kyle is academically inclined he's also athletic, so I hate when the fandom just drops him in the "bookworm" or "nerd" category when there's alot more to him. He likes basketball, poetry, he's good with computers, he'd have a super high grade in his classes, he'd probably be pretty damn physically fit and could beat the shit outta someone if he wanted to. Honestly he'd be one of the more popular kids, he gets along with just about anyone. I feel like he'd end up doing tons of extracurriculars in Middle and Highschool to live up to expectations he THINKS his parents have of him.
I ALSO HATE WHEN PEOPLE FEMINIZE HIM. LIKE GOD!!! It just irks me when a character is very clearly given traits or a personality and people just ignore it in favor of making said character however they want. Have fun or whatever, but why are we drawing Kyle like a subby yaoi anime boy 😭😭,, Maybe thats just me but it gives me MASSIVE ick. Like, Cartman wears drag consistently in the show so duh I toss some makeup on him every once in awhile but Kyle? Guys c'mon did we watch the same show?
I don't think Kyle has a very strong moral compass, he THINKS he does but it's pretty common that his opinions can be swayed or change based on the situation or how it affects him. He's not particularly nice to cousin Kyle, whatever HIS reason is, it's not good enough of a reason to try and have your cousin beaten up (TFBW) or sent away on multiple occasions; he was SOO ready to stop defending Ike the second he found out Ike was adopted, just "nah not my brother not my problem" ;
my personal favorite example is in 'Fun Times with Weapons' when they're doing their individual introductions he says and I quote "My nunchucks turn me into Boraku, the deadly but compassionate ninja who protects those in trouble" ,,,, and then Kenny accidentally hits Butters with a ninja star, Cartman suggests they kill Butters to hide the evidence, and Kyle's immediate response is to agree with Eric.
I mean,, for fucks sake dude had murderous intent and was down to kill the Queer Eye guys just cause he couldn't fit in with his friends. That doesn't mean he's not often the voice of reason or right in most situations, but I also wouldn't regard him as being the most morally sound out of the main 4 (I think Kenny holds that title)
This is just a personal take entirely, but I don't get the ship Style when Kyle is the one who likes Stan. More often than not Kyle will just up and bail on Stan whenever he becomes too much of an issue. He didn't want to help Stan in 'Whale Whores', didn't want to get involved in 'Hummels and Heroin',,, I mean we ALLL know Kyle ditches Stan to go hang out with Eric and make Cartman Burgers in 'Assburgers';; in 'Trapped in the Closet' when Stan says he's saving his money and doesn't want to spend it like his friends are doing, this exact exchange happens:
Stan: "Well I can't spend any money."
Cartman: "Fine then, Be a Jew." (Walks off)
Kyle: "Yeah, see ya." (Follows)
I'm not saying Kyle doesn't care about Stan, they're best friends he very clearly does. Like he does EVERYTHING he can to save Stan in the Imagination Land saga, Just sometimes he doesn't care or is a little more focused on himself. Whereas Stan is loyal to a motherfucking fault.
Also personal take- I don't get Scene Kyle. I feel like Kyle would make fun of subcultures like that, he fucking mocked the goth kids. He wouldn't put himself in some group or label like "punk", "scene", "emo", etc. he'd think its kinda stupid. Like , "what's the practicality of wearing all those accessories? Why would you WANT people to stare at you? You bleached your hair to get it that color and now it's RUINED!!"
(ofc people can do whatever they want no hate at all)
Just my high ass takes from watching the show ✋
