I HAVE TO PAY ATTENTION BUT MY MIND IS ON THE CIViL WAR TRAAILER I'VE WAIT FOR SO FuKING LONG AND NOW I CANT WATCh BECAUSE OF CLASSEs

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I HAVE TO PAY ATTENTION BUT MY MIND IS ON THE CIViL WAR TRAAILER I'VE WAIT FOR SO FuKING LONG AND NOW I CANT WATCh BECAUSE OF CLASSEs

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I am not a mistress. Never have been, never will be. But I would die to become one. If it's for him. If it's only for him. This shame is mingled with desperation to be with him. I'm not stupid enough to do that. But I am crazy enough to consider it. Haha. Can you smell the irony. I hate having to pity myself. I hate trying to justify myself. I hate being alone. He keeps telling me to smile, but he knows that I'm breaking inside. STOP BEING SO GODDAMN NICE. I already told him this was unhealthy but he kept telling me to stay - who's selfish now? Me, who's already tired and hurt of everything and wants to forget everything or him, who's married but still looking for the company of his best friend? We're both twenty years old. Stop dicking around and let me go. And me, hey me. I'm talking to you, brain. Stop being so fucking stupid you ignorant shithead.