#aroacespectrum

For a long time, I couldn’t quite put into words why romance and sex never really clicked for me. I liked people, I cared about them, but that spark everyone talked about, the crushes, the butterflies, the desire, just wasn’t there.

Eventually, I found the words that actually fit: aroace.

I don’t experience romantic or sexual attraction, and honestly, that makes sense of so many things I used to wonder about.

But that doesn’t mean I don’t notice beauty.

Sometimes I find men or women (or anyone, really) aesthetically attractive, the way someone carries themselves, their style, the energy they give off. It’s not about wanting them, it’s just a quiet kind of appreciation.

That’s why I also describe myself as bi-aesthetic aroace.

I can see beauty in anyone, but I don’t feel the need for romance or sex. It’s not absence, it’s peace.

Touch and closeness are personal for me, too. Being touched or crowded can make me anxious, and I’ve learned that letting someone close — physically or emotionally — is a privilege. It’s about trust, not distance.

Realising this about myself has been freeing. I don’t need to force a type of connection that doesn’t feel natural. I can still build strong friendships, deep bonds, and meaningful relationships — just in my own way.

It’s okay to exist outside the boxes. It’s okay to be comfortable with who you are, even if it doesn’t match what others expect.

💚🖤🤍💜

bi-aesthetic aroace | autistic | proud to know myself better

Having to share the link before Tumblr isn't showing the post on the tags yet- 🤧

feral-sexual/romantic (i can't think of a better name right now...)

I'm coining this to describe my own experience with romance and sexual attraction,

a feral cat is a cat whose exposure to humans was little to nonexistent or was dangerous, leading to the cat being afraid of and averse to humans.

For me, this is exactly how i feel about romance and sexual attraction, I've considered myself cupioromantic for a while but i still find myself afraid of people finding romantic or sexual interest in me, despite my desire for it.

as a wlw on the aroace spectrum it upsets me that people don’t want aces in the LGBTQA+ community, because i want to belong in the community not just as a gay person but also as an ace person. i’m about just as sure of my asexuality as of my gayness (which tbh isn’t very sure, that’s true, but it’s still part of my identity). And sure i might be just “confused” but doesn’t LGBTQA+ include questioning people? Are you the same people who think bi people are just in a “phase”? Sexuality is confusing. 

Sure i am conflicted about cis heterosexual aces in the community. And sure aces don’t face the same level of discrimination and aren’t oppressed. But ultimately i still think we belong in the LGBT community.