jaydicktim stripper au (undercover?) (jason is the stripper)
it's been a million years and i've been rotating this on and off the entire time lol. i can see a moment of like--tim is this really straightedge kid, obsessively so, and dick is like ok, you've dated around (a lot) (lol tim) and you don't drink or drug and that's fine, good, even, but strip club? let's hit up a strip club. or maybe it's not dick's prerogative but a titans thing, and the the titans teams are always some weird mishmosh, so it's like--here's dick and tim but also roy and maybe kon and some of the girls because why the hell not, and this strip club has men in it. okay. somebody knew that when they decided to drive the whole pack of sweaty mostly-sober vigilantes here but nobody's sure whose idea it was anymore.
tim disappears fucking instantaneously. he's in the crowd. he's got his mouth suctioned to the lip of a beer bottle and banging his teeth on it repeatedly because if he does anything else but stim absently he's going to scream. because jason todd is on the pole. jason! the red hood! jason from HIS HOUSE? and the fucking titans are here! and oh God why does he look Like That. Who oiled him up? Who covered his scars? He can't reach all of them himself. Someone touched him with such careful attention to apply all that makeup and oh. fuck. he's looking right at tim. (and he's furious.)
ANYWAY //puts myself to bed// i think jason is undercover and he's massively fucking pissed that the titans rolled up. tim has a raging hard on and there's no way jason is getting out of here without at least dick seeing him, but there's also the fun of jason having to be Very Undercover about all this and giving a lap dance to, say, mr dick grayson. or tim! loudmouth kon points out that his little buddy used to be vehemently against premarital sex and he's probably STILL A VIIIIRGIIIIIN and yeah well. jason is whispering in tim's ear about cracking open his rich boy wallet and paying up because after this he is going to be strangled in his sleep. (he's also aware that tim is hard. and that dick is watching. for normal reasons, surely. surely because he's a protective bat and not because he likes watching. definitely the former. yeah. ok. jason likes having their eyes on him. oops.)
