#anxiousness

I've been noticing a lot of sadness around me as of late. Whether that be from friends who caught colds, friends suffering from chronic illnesses, or... others who are dealing with mourning and loss.

I meet a few of these criteria right now-- things have been hard.

But something that God has taught me these past few years-- is that hopelessness is never an option. As long as there's breath in your lungs, you and your situation are capable of change. For me, one of the battles I have faced has been involving my health these last few years. And no matter what doctor's office or specialist I went to, no one had any answers as to why I would faint and have crippling attacks. I felt so defeated and tired. I was angry and bitter for the lack of answers.

So I prayed. I went to the One Who knew exactly what was happening inside my body and if it was possible to overcome it. I studied about anxiety. The class was called "Quieting a Noisy Soul", and it hurt me so very deeply because it spoke truth and revealed to me just how many LIES I was believing. How often I was LOST in the past and letting it taint and poison my present. How much I tried to rely on myself instead of God.

How much I didn't truly trust Him.

"The root of anxiety is UNBELIEF." Is one of the many phrases from this study that hit me like a freight train. It revealed to me just how much negativity and hopelessness I had allowed into my heart and soul involving my health.

"This will never go away."

"I'll always be a burden."

"Nothing will ever change."

If you have believed these things, I am telling you right now, begging you to STOP. This is where spirals begin. Spirals so dangerous that they will infect your life like a disease. Because I believed these things, my physical, mental, and spiritual health plummeted. I was constantly thinking and fantasizing "what if's". Playing out fake scenarios in my head of past conversations that did NOTHING but grow my anxiety.

And I found out, through the words of my loving, blunt cousin, that it was my fault I was having the fainting spells. That my anxiety had been the trigger for them all along. That I had TRAINED my body to respond to stress by passing out. That I had let my anxiety control me like a puppet. Facing that fact... hurt. It hurt so badly. But it needed to be done, or else healing would never begin.

And now, even to this day nearly a year later, I am still recovering from the damage I had caused to my spirit and body. But God is good, and His mercy never fails me. He's led me to a better place now, where I can eat again, where I have not fainted in nearly a year, and where I am able to shout "STOP!" to my anxious thoughts and my spirals. God showed me that it wasn't hopeless.

I hope and pray that this will encourage you. Sharpen you. And remind you that you are not alone in your pain and suffering.

Never forget that as long as Christ lives, there will ALWAYS be hope. And His love for you will never change. He will never stop waiting at your door, no matter how long it takes for you to open it. He meets us where we're at. In our darkness, in our pain, and in our hopelessness.

To God be the glory.

First art of 2025!

Does the sound of footsteps, thumping noises, or doors opening make anyone anxious?

No?

Just me?

Have you ever had butterflies in your stomach when you’re excited and anxious? It’s almost poetic, isn’t it? But have you ever stopped to wonder what causes that? Well, your gut and brain are connected to each other through the vagus nerve. We might think that what happens in your gut stays in the gut, but that’s not quite right. What happens in your gut can affect your whole body. So when you feel anxious, your gut tells your brain, and your brain sends a signal back to the gut. This causes the muscles in your stomach to tense up, which is why we feel butterflies. So next time you start to wonder, ‘Is it my nerves?’ Well, guess what—it really is your gut and your brain working together.