#anna-varney

Being depressive means that EVERYTHING becomes an ordeal. Sometimes I can’t even find the strength (or motivation) to get out of bed… or to do anything but stare at the wall or whatever happens to be in front of me. Suddenly it’s five hours later and I am still staring at the same point with petrified features and a blank expression. Music(k) is the only thing in this world that I like… and that makes it even worse, because at this point in time, it is absolutely impossible to write any new music… or to create anything new for that matter… - and I am not even referring to a metaphysical concept, like Steiner’s Akasha-chronicle for example. You know, the idea that everything already exists in that great book of life, and that essentially all you have to do is to find, or rather remember it. No, it’s all a lot simpler than that… and consequently far more depressing. The truth is: EVERYTHING HAS BEEN DONE ALREADY. Period.