*The Captain receives a basket containing: a variety of fruit, 2 bottles of wine, about ~700 bits, and a letter which is sealed with a wax stamp of a coffin.*
O: "Cellie? Do you know a Mr.⚰️?"
C: "A mister what?! How did you even do that with your beak!?"
O: "..."
C: Celaeno chuckles to herself and looks at the accompanying envelope. "Oh shit!"
O: "Language!"
C: "Oh... fire in the hole... I dunno, I panicked. I have a friend and/or love interest, who I just majorly friendzoned and cucked the heck out of... or something. I hope he's not drinking garlic juice or listening to Linkin Park, or whatever it is vampires do when they get depressed. I'm gonna rush over to his house--"
O: "So this is from that unusually odd fellow, Stine, I take it?"
C: "I said 'extremely' odd, but whatever, I need to find him before he walks into a church or crosses over running water, or someone slams the iron gate on him at cram school... 'cuz pure iron is really bad for vampires, just FYI."
O: "Don't you think we should, at least, see what's written on this letter first? He might simply just be happy for us. That's always a possibility."
C: "Oh, right. Crack the seal."
O: "I think it's addressed to you?"
C: "It's his coffin seal, it's not really... it's addressed to both of us, okay? Just open it already, I can't do manual labor on Sunday."
O: "Manual... are you serious? You've gotten so superstitious since we were children, is that a 'pirate thing,' or did it start when you lost your leg?"
C: "Both. Just. Open. The. Letter."
Ocypete breaks the seal and opens the letter with one of her claws. Inside she finds:
