#andreaspost

Self expression can take many different forms. It isn’t just about how we present our physical selves, but it’s also how we present our souls outward for the world to see. We start out in life being told what to do and what to wear, but as we grow, we begin to develop a sense of self awareness, discovering bits and parts of who we are. Expressing who we are is a vital part of being human. It helps us express our emotions and it gives us an identity, helping us feel complete.

When it comes to showing off our personal style, most often times we develop a “signature look.” At a very young age, I had already decided for myself that my look was having long, flowing hair. To this day, my hair still continues to be one of my main forms of expression (coloring, locking, and shaving it) and my security blanket of sorts. So, when my mom gave me a short, above the shoulder, very “in” and “right now” haircut, it was nothing short of traumatizing for me. I remember feeling embarrassed and as if everyone was staring at me, knowing too, that this haircut wasn’t for me. I thought with my thick hair being this short, it was way too poofy looking. It was just not me, and this was all at the age of 6 or 7. At an early age we are already acknowledging who we are and how we want to express that. As each year goes by, we see more, hear more, and experience more things that begin to influence who we are.

From the day my mom started letting me pick my own clothes, I definitely did right away; and in 7th grade I’ll never forget when she let me do exactly what I wanted to do with my hair. I’m sure she regretted all of this as my teenage years persisted. When my mom took me to the salon that day, I got red and purple highlights. I never felt more like myself. That was the beginning of using my hair and my personal style as a canvas to express how I felt on the inside to the world.

Showing my insides by converting it into something I’ve created on the outside is something I take pleasure and pride in. When you look good, you feel good; and we should all feel good about who we are. Fortunately for myself, peers making fun of me, people judging me, and my mom not always being particularly fond of my style choices, has never stopped me from being me. We’re all given this shell for a limited time, and I want to decorate and personalize it as much as I can while I can. Everything I adorn my body with is what gives me confidence. So although I might be “prettier without it,” my large septum piercing is actually one of the things that makes me feel most beautiful. In addition, there’s nothing like picking out the perfect clothing items, putting them together, and creating the perfect outfit. Whether it’s a night on the town, getting groceries, or even going for a hike, every occasion requires an outfit. Although, with anxiety this can be a bit of a problem as well; because just like 7-year-old Andrea freaking out over a bad haircut, 24-year-old Andrea will freak out over the wrong outfit. (Just another way I’m expressing myself.) Something is triggered inside saying this isn't the look I was going for, and this isn’t how I was wanting to present myself. Everything I wear reflects my mood and how I am wanting to show myself in that moment, whether that be more feminine, masculine, modest, or flirty. That’s the beauty of expressing yourself outwardly through your clothing, and that’s why it’s one of my most important outlets. I’ve had days where I’ve felt ugly or it’s just been a stressful day and playing dress up in my closet has proved to be an instant mood booster.

It’s important that we express our souls for everyone to see, whether it’s with style, sports, or any art of any kind. It’s important that we find who we really are and take pride in it. What we have on the inside is completely beautiful. Being able to show ourselves through different forms is an amazing thing, and the feeling we are able to receive from choosing to express and show ourselves is irreplaceable. Whether I’m mindlessly dancing the night away, putting in my biggest piece of septum jewelry, or buzzing the hair off my head, each one gives me a feeling of joy inside: the joy of being able to truly be myself.

Who am I? That’s a pretty good question. I turned 24 this year, one year closer to thriving (13 Going on 30 reference, for those who don’t know.) Some 24-year-olds really have it going on. The rise of social media is really highlighting that for the rest of us. I’d say I’ve got it at least going. Being the youngest of a really smart and talented family can be pretty intimidating. I have always been proud and impressed of what my 3 older siblings have accomplished. I’ve been lucky enough to watch each of them go through their lives and “grow up,” even though they may think it was the other way around. When it comes to life choices and the path each of us has taken, I guess I’ve taken the less traditional route; but I’ve been fortunate enough to have a family that actually respects and supports my life choices, or at least chooses to put a smile on and let Jesus take the wheel. Sometimes I can get beef or overwhelm my family about the way I go about life. I’d say it’s a pretty play-it-by-ear approach, but in the words of the entire cast of RENT: No day but today.

I’ve been out of school for a year and a half now. I graduated and got my degree in Digital Photography, something I’ve been wanting to do and writing about in my journal since I was a little girl. After I graduated, I partied a lot with my girlfriends, interned with Planned Parenthood of Indiana and Kentucky, got some cool photography gigs, met my partner in current life, adopted my 3rd cat, and moved out into a bachelorette pad. I really had it going on. After I graduated, my anxiety also increased at its record high and my depression followed too. I slowly stopped seeking out photography jobs and stopped making any art of any kind for myself. Being in your early 20s can be scary when you start thinking about how you’re growing older and you really don’t want to waste your life. When my sisters came to me with the idea of doing a blog, it really came at the right time for me. I’m excited to use this as a creative outlet and to stay involved and keep up with my sisters’ current lives. I may not have it totally going on right now, but I’ve got food, shelter, my boyfriend doesn’t shun me for my emotions or anything that makes me me, and I’ve got a plethora of wonderful humans and animals that fill my life with joy. So I’m going to play it by ear, and see where this life takes me.