#and externally

BRB AS I LISTEN TO THIS ON REPEAT HELLO????

In other news, I picked up calligraphy again, but I’m very rusty - I haven’t practiced in over 10 years, and I really need to 🫠

DYLAN O'BRIEN I SWEAR TO F*CKING GOD!!

I'm 95% sure that half of my reactions from here on out are just gonna be complimenting Dylan's AMAZING acting, but HOW CAN YOU NOT?1

I mean, DUDE!!

The way his eyes got crazier, and there was that little hint of playfulness (just like Kira talked about earlier in the episode), and then the little "you okay?" with just enough of Stiles to make it sound genuine for a SPLIT second, but then the entire base emotion through all of that being pride, because he knew (or, at least, he THOUGHT) he had won, because they'd all played right into his hands.

D*MN Dylan. I swear to god, you are a true treasure.

Holy sh*t.

Anyways MY HEART.

I mean, Scott was clearly wary, and he clearly knew something was up, and I feel like he wasn't necessarily surprised that all of that happened the way it did (although he clearly didn't pick up on the pain thing like I did, 'cause that threw him off a little bit), but I feel like his optimism and love for his best friend got in the way, because I really think he was just HOPING they would get away with it. He was just HOPING they'd be fine, and that maybe this really was Stiles, and maybe it really could be Stiles, for a second.

So when it wasn't, there was slight surprise at the way it all played out, but I think more than anything, it was just fear and HURT, because he wanted his instincts to be wrong, and he wanted Stiles to have been okay, and he wanted it to have been easier to save his best friend.

But of course it wasn't. Because these things are never easy.

Also I FREAKING TOLD YOU THE PAIN THING WAS GONNA COME BACK TO BITE US! I SWEAR TO GOD!

Also the fact that they flashed back to all the little moments that I had already figured out and picked up on because I spend my entire tv show watching career over-analyzing moments like that. XD

But ANYWAYS.

Thank F*CK for bad*ss Deaton again. I'm so glad we were at the animal clinic. That wound up being a good call regardless, because it meant Deaton could come in and save Scott (and, by default, Kira and HOPEFULLY Stiles).

Also I can't decide how much Deaton cares about Stiles in this situation. Like, he clearly wants the Nogitsune dead, and he seems very set on that, and he's usually super affectionate and paternal towards Stiles, so I FEEL LIKE he'd be inclined to put Stiles' safety first, but given his current attitude, I'm more inclined to believe that he's determined to kill the Nogitsune, whatever the cost (which, again, Scott would never let happen--even though we all know Stiles would let it happen to himself. But again, they'd BURN THE WORLD to save each other and I'm KIND OF HERE FOR IT!! <3 <3 <3)

Anyways.

I have to get food, and then I will 100% be watching the next episode, since I should have JUST enough time to watch it before I have to head home, and because, again, determined to finish Season 3 this weekend!

Here's another lovely gif of Dylan O'Brien's amazing acting, because in all of this heartbreak, I have to have SOMETHING to be happy about.