#and devestated

I'm officially single

Legit still sweating bout that time in the last episode of Critical Role where for a whole minute I cried thinking Beau was gonna die falling down that hole. I was so sleepy but that woke me the fuck up.

I...just finished watching Penny Dreadful. I am pretty stunned right now. Feel kinda numb. And shocked.

Wasted the last few days, searching the internet and sending out applications for nothing. I'm back to where I was before: not able to afford a semester in the US. I hate my government for apperantly helping kids whose parents have just a limited amount of income. But just because my parents earn more money doesn't mean they are able to help me. This is so mean and I hate it. With the government help it wouldn't even be a problem. So I'm now only left to hoping I get 1 of the 3(!) places at our partner school. And if not I don't know what to do. I guess I would have to pay it all out of my own pocket. I worked hard for that money over the last year and yes it was supposed to be for the US but if I have to pay everything I have like no money left to travel or enjoy myself over there and that was what this money was supposed to be for. This is all so hard and frustrating. I want this so bad and that's the worst part of it all.