#amg1

I groaned a little louder, grabbing the top of the duvet with both hands and pulling it downwards, letting my eyes flicker open and grow accustom to the light. I turned my head, seeing that my digital clock was telling me it was 10am. It’s too fucking early. I looked back up to the ceiling, taking a deep breath in, then back out. The only downside I could find to having roommate, was the fact that my roommate was a morning person. I would have put money on the fact that Rachel had already been awake for at least an hour, if not two. I, however, had always been the type of person who could sleep all day, and finally come to life at night. But I suppose, in a way I was grateful for it. Without her, I knew that my sleeping pattern would have been totally fucked. “ANNA!” She yelled a little louder that time; my body jolted. I yanked the sheets further down. “WHAT?” I yelled back, real frustration in my voice. “YOU’RE ON THE TELE!” She finally had my attention. With one further deep intake of breath, I took myself from the comforts of my bed. My toes were the first to exit the warmth, seeming to sting slightly as they came into contact with the cold air. I let out an exhausted squeal, moving the rest of myself a lot quicker than I had planned, darting over to the door with as much speed as I could, covering my naked body with the dressing gown that hung from a hook on the back of my door. I moved from my room, walking through the hall and into the living room, seeing Rachel stood in her underwear, bouncing up and down, a spoon hanging from her mouth and a half full yoghurt pot in hand. “Put some clothes on. And please don’t spill the yoghurt.” I chuckled. She shrugged her shoulders, continuing to jump around. I turned to face the screen of the tele, seeing it hanging on the wall, paused on a still of the video. “Rach, I’ve seen the video more than a million times. I know I’m in it.” I joked. “No, it’s like… a celeb news thing, and they’re talking about you! I just paused it.” She smiled. “Celeb news?” I laughed at the very idea of it. “Celeb fucking news?” She laughed, agreeing that the very idea of me being a celebrity was ridiculous. Rachel turned and put the yoghurt on the kitchen counter before turning back around, grabbing the remote from the settee, and pressing play. It is rumoured that Anna Black, star of the Arctic Monkey’s - Do I Wanna Know, video, will be accompanying Alex Turner to The Brit Awards this evening. Since the song was released, Anna has been very high in demand due to the incredible success of the video, but she tends to keep herself to herself. We look forward to seeing her all dressed up tonight. As quickly as it had started, the pointless article had finished. Rachel started screaming, her arms thrown high in the air as she bounced up and down, alternating between which leg she lifted up in the air. I giggled at her, letting out an exasperated breath, rolling my eyes. I was shaking my head, walking over to the fridge and grabbing myself a yoghurt. “IT’S THE MOST EXCITING THING THAT HAS EVER HAPPENED EVER!” She yelped. “Don’t...” I tried. I turned around and she was with me in a second, grabbing my hands, making me drop the luckily unopened tub on the floor. “No, seriously, Anna! This is so exciting. You’re going to The Brits tonight, with fucking Alex Turner on your arm, and you were just on celeb news.” She had finally stopped shouting. I didn’t reply, I simply bent down, picked up the tub, and sat it down on the kitchen top. I couldn’t even bring myself to look at Rachel, who was finally calming down, sensing my unease. She grabbed me, both hands meeting the top of my arms as she turned me, forcing me to look at her. “Why aren’t you more excited?” She asked, concerned. “M'just nervous.” I whispered. She pulled me in, hugging me fiercely. I wrapped my arms back around her, unfazed by her bare body. Because the truth was, that I was terrified. The video blew up in my face, and I hadn’t been expecting it. My childhood dreams had come true when I went to see a friend at university in Leeds, and we somehow ended up bumping into the one and only Alex Turner. The whole thing was totally surreal; I couldn’t help but think back to the days where it seemed the Arctic Monkeys were the only band I listened to, traveling on the bus to school, talking about how madly in love with Mr Turner I was. So, as you can imagine, I was a little overwhelmed. We spoke freely, and he eventually came to tell me that I was exactly what he imagined for the part in their video. Not exactly the kind of offer you refuse. But for some reason, the video became huge. Everyone had watched, and it was such a massive topic of conversation amongst people, and I was a big part of that whirlwind. I had been thrust into the limelight, without any time to prepare, and I was unable to make the decision if I actually wanted that or not. It was mine. And truth be told, it petrified me. “You’ll be fine, silly.” Rachel attempted to comfort me. “I know, I know. It’s just a little strange.” I pulled away from her, giving off a little sigh as my gaze fell to the floor. “C’mon, you’re a sex symbol! You could probably turn up looking like hell and people would still rave about you.” I grabbed the yoghurt from the side, and put it back in the fridge. She watched me with sad eyes, knowing how much it was affecting me, how nervous I was, how scared I was by all the attention I had been getting. She was excited for me, and seemed to be able to see the positive side of things at all times, but I couldn’t. I often saw the negatives. I felt ungrateful. I felt like I was being dismissive of the good it had brought to my life. The mixture of emotions I felt about the entire thing basically meant that I was slowly driving myself insane. “I’m gunna go back to bed for a bit.” I informed her. I got a sympathetic nod, before I slumped back to my room, wanting to sleep until the evening.

The woman in front of me prodded almost aggressively at my face with a makeup brush in an attempt to make me look half decent. I squirmed away from her a little, feeling slightly unnatural having someone else doing my makeup, controlling the way I was going to look. “Hold still!” She demanded. “Sorry.” I whispered, trying my best to become neutral. I let my concentration fall to the woman’s fingers. They were wrinkled and aged, but still more attractive than I imagined hands ever could be. They looked soft to the touch, her nails long but natural, painted a light colour with a slight shimmer. She had about 3 rings on every finger, each different, none complementing each other, which made them look spectacular. I glanced up to her face, which was incredibly close my own as she concentrated on making my skin look flawless. I couldn’t help but admire her; I imagined she was about 60 years old, but she looked incredible. She really cared about her appearance in the best way possible, not over-done at all, just incredibly elegant for her age, and with the exact right amount of quirkiness. She was pretty spectacular. She took her brush and moved away from my face, looking at me from a distance. “Okay… I think we’re done.” She smiled. She stepped aside, confidently revealing the mirror to me so that I could fully take in my altered appearance. “Holy shit.” I blurted out. It wasn’t that she had made me look like someone else, which I had been nervous about, expecting to look at my reflection and see someone unrecognisable. She had simply made me look like the best possible version of myself. “Bad?” She quizzed, though I can’t say she seemed worried at all. “No. Not at all. It’s... amazing. How do you do that?” I was genuinely baffled. “Years of practice.” She leered, taking a step back and folding her arms as she stared at me through the mirror, impressed with herself. I leant forwards, taking my fingers and stroking my cheek, which hadn’t been so soft since the years before puberty hit. My nerves calmed an amount I didn’t care to admit, because I did not want to be the type of person who placed so much importance on appearances. But just seeing how much better I looked with my makeup professionally done really did help. I’d never been to an event so large in my life, and I wanted to look and feel good about myself. A knock on the door took me away from the mirror. “Come in.” Me and the lady chimed in time with one another. The one and only Alex Turner poked his head round the corner. “Are we decent?” He chuckled. “Never.” I smiled, standing myself up. He let himself in, looking me up and down, confused. “Well, the hair and the makeup is good, but I’m not sure about the outfit.” He smiled. I looked down, almost forgetting I was still in a baggy Beatles t-shirt and leggings. “WHAT?” I joked. “You don’t like it? But I have on my finest robes.” ”Sorry,” He held his hands up on the air. “My mistake.” “Her dress is over there.” The lady interrupted. I turned to her, seeing the direction her finger was pointing and letting her guide me to the outfit that had been picked out for me. That was when my nerves made their unwelcome return. I wandered over to the large black bag hanging from the wall, worried that the outfit would be something I would hate, something I would never actually pick out for myself in a million years. I didn’t want to feel uncomfortable, because the thought of being on the red carpet at all with all those flashing lights burning my skin made me uncomfortable enough as it was. I really didn’t want that feeling developing any further. I wished I’d been allowed to decide what I would wear, but apparently that wasn’t an option. I took my shaking hand and raised it to the top of the zip, calming myself as I pulled down slowly. A grin appeared on my mouth right away. Black lace ran the entirety of the of dress, creating beautiful flower patterns amongst the weaves. It was high-necked, tight fitting until the point where it would fall just above my hips, before it fell into a loose material. Alex came behind me, raising his hands to my shoulders and squeezing them, his fingers lingering near my collarbone and his thumb on my back. “You’re going to look great, Love. Don’t worry about anything, okay?” He comforted me.

We sat giggling in the large black car that had picked us up, steadily drinking our beers and listening to AM as we made our way to the awards. The alcohol seemed to calm my nerves almost completely, but I think the company was assisting with that too. Though the boys already seemed close to gone. We chatted with each other in high spirits, laughing away and never letting the conversation steer to where we were going and what was about to happen, because I think the lads understood exactly how nervous I was, and they were being incredibly understanding. But it didn’t take long for the mood to die. “OKAY!” The PR man that had hired for the evening cut our conversation short. “Black, I need to talk to you for a minute.” I hadn’t been expecting them to need to do anything with me, really. I thought I just needed to turn up, take a few pictures, and then enjoy the rest of my evening, surrounded by some of the world’s most famous artists, trying not to freak out. I didn’t have any more of a role to play. “Me?” I quizzed. “Yeah. We have a few rules for you, so I want you to listen up, okay?” I shrugged my shoulders, hating the word rules immediately, but intrigued. “Alright.” The boys and I listened eagerly, and I was happy to see that they all looked as confused as I did. “You’re supposed to be sexy, okay? The video makes you look sexy, and that’s what people like, so I don’t want on any this.” He groaned, pointing all his fingers towards me and moving his hand in circles, pretty much gesturing at everything about me. “Any of what?” I spat out, already annoyed. “Any of this… fun loving, friendly... bullshit. Sex sells, sweetheart. We need you to look serious, we need you to look enticing.” He said, looking at the pages that sat on his lap rather than giving me eye contact. “So you’re saying... you don’t want me to be friendly?” It was laughable. “You’re kidding, right?” Jamie laughed. The man’s eyes finally raised, looking at all of us as though we were idiots. “Is something funny?” He was angered. “No.” Jamie raised his hands in defeat, slumping back into his seat. “You carry on, mate! No worries.” “Good.” He continued through a fake grin. “So no smiling for the cameras, alright? You might be able to get away with a smirk, but that’s it. And no interviews, I don’t want them to even hear you speak.” I couldn’t even muster the words to try and explain how annoyed I was with the situation. It wasn’t that I wanted to take part in interviews or any of that bullshit, but I didn’t like being told that I couldn’t. I just sat with my eyebrows lowered and my mouth dropped, looking the man straight in the eyes, hoping he would tell me he was joking. But he didn’t. “She can’t speak?” Alex piped up. “I don’t want them hearing that Northern accent.” “We’re fucking Northern.” Matt then started. “I don’t care!” The man was almost yelling. “These are the rules we’re going by tonight, okay?” “Hold on a fucking minute-” Alex sat forward, pointing his finger at him with real frustration, but I cut him short. “No, it’s fine, Alex. It doesn’t matter, it’s fine.” I just wanted to get the night over with at that point, and maybe not speaking and generally not acting like myself would help that happen. I looked down, concentrating on the lace of my dress and the blonde tips of my dyed hair, holding in my anger, maybe even holding in tears. I hadn’t expected any of this when I said yes to being in the video. I hadn’t expected being in a video to change so much for me. I was suddenly this public figure, people had ideas about me, people were forming opinions and jumping to conclusions about me. I hadn’t even allowed myself to fully think about the lack of job opportunities after this shit-storm. Then on top of that, I was being asked to attend an event and to act stuck-up, which wasn’t going to make me look any better. I already felt lost, before we even got there. It was mere minutes later that we finally pulled up outside the building, lights flashing towards the car before they even knew who was inside. All I could hear was screams, every other noise was drowned out by the hundreds of people calling out, reaching out to the car, trying to stroke it, totally entranced by the idea that there were important people inside. I was totally bewildered by it, regardless of the fact that if I was on the outside of the car with them, I would be exactly the same. “Holy shit, I can’t do this.” I whispered. Alex turned to me quickly, placing his beer down in front of him, not caring as it spilled and the liquid soaked into the carpet. He engulfed my hands in his, and looked to me with caring, if not slightly misty, eyes. “It’s not actually that bad.” He told me. “And we only have to be on the carpet for about five minutes, and then we can go inside and you can be entirely yourself for the rest of the night.” “No one’s ever told me I can’t be myself before!” I gasped in a panic, rushing my words. “Actually, usually the fucking opposite. My parents always told me to be myself, they are really nice y’know? So like, I don’t really know what I’m doing. What if I fall, my dress might blow up in the wind-” “Your dress goes down to the floor.” Alex chuckled, interrupting my mad speech. “I know, but it could still happen, I’m a fucking walking disaster on the best of days and-” “Shut up.” He cut me off for the final time. “It’s going to be fine. Just grip onto me okay? Don’t let go.” “LETS GET A MOVE ON!” The PR man shouted. Alex gave me a caring smile, and the car door opened. Matt, James and Nick stepped out first, and the cheers became even louder somehow. Alex offered me his hand, which I gripped tightly, combining my fingers with his. I closed my eyes, taking a deep breath in, faltering slightly, but finding some kind of calm, luckily. I opened my eyes again, and followed Alex as he stood himself up, and got out of the car. I was surprised I didn’t fall flat on my face right away. In fact, it was probably the smoothest exit I had ever managed to make from a car. The screams grew ever louder, the sight of Alex Turner affecting people’s vocal chords in an extreme way. But as I said, in any normal situation, on the other side of the metal fences, I would have been exactly the same. I moved my hand from his, linking my arm with him instead so I was as latched on as physically possible, as close as I could be as the lights started blinding me, leaving tiny white dots in my mind and darting across my vision. The boys were totally at home, as cool and collected as ever as we walked down the carpet towards the designated area for the best pictures. The fact I wasn’t allowed to smile became a little easier at the sight that none of the boys did, either. They just walked down the carpet like they owned the place. It wasn’t overly difficult feeling cool when I was accompanied by the Arctic Monkeys. We reached the focus area where the main pictures should have been taken, my heels already stinging my feet as we came to a standstill, turning to our side, and meeting the mob of paparazzi who began shouting, screaming at us, demanding us to do as they were asking. It was bizarre. I wondered how anyone could ever get used to that kind of thing. I glanced my head to the boys for a second, studying their faces, trying to blend in with them, not wanting to stand out, not wanting the uncomfortable feeling I had on the inside reach any part of my outer appearance. I turned back to the cameras, mouth parted slightly, looking around like I wanted to fuck everyone and everything there, trying my best to look just a little enticing. Don’t smile. Don’t smile. Don’t smile. Luckily, I had grown quite accustom to looking and acting that sort of way during the video shoot. I had been directed, told how I needed to look into the camera, what I needed to look like, how to ooze the idea of sex and seduction. So it wasn’t as uncomfortable as I had first expected. But usually, if I saw a flashing camera, I would smile! Unless I was drunk, in which case I never really seemed to know what I was doing with my face. “You’re doing great.” Alex leaned into my ear. Though he was shouting, it was still like he was whispering, the crowd seemed to be growing denser and noisier by the second. At first, I couldn’t quite figure out why they were becoming more restless. But it only took a turn of my head to realise. I had turned to yell back to him, and spotted the exact reason the crowd had become so riled up. “Holy shit.” I shouted, which was definitely not what I had originally been planning to say. “What?” He looked at me, our lips lingering close, causing the cameras to flash a little more frequently if that was even possible. They were eating it up. It was actually slightly amusing. “That’s One Direction.” I stuttered, staring past Alex and looking to the five boys stood taking pictures. They were a spectacle to behold. I understood the hype just looking at them. All dressed to the nines, totally owning the place. They were enchanting without even doing anything, still laughing and conversing with one another, at the same time as posing for the cameras. They knew exactly what they were doing. In a strange way, it was haunting. Alex simply rolled his eyes, and looked back to the mob. “I’m impressed they’re actually good looking in real life.” I spoke in his ear, directing my gaze to the skin of his cheek. I then proceeded to bite my lips, acting as though I had whispered something sexual in his ear. Alex grinned to the floor, acting along with me, letting my character grow. “Shame they’re talentless.” He spoke. “Are you kidding? Have you listened to their latest stuff? They can actually write a really decent tune, especially that Louis Tomlinson kid. I was genuinely impressed.” “No, shockingly enough, I haven’t listened to a single One Direction album.” He grinned, bringing his head back up, smiling next to my lips. “Well maybe if you weren’t a music snob, you might give them the time of day.” I smirked next to him, looking down to his lips, knowing that was the closest to a smile I could get away with. We were making it seem like there was some sexual tension between us, and we knew the media would adore that. Alex looked down to my lips, wrapping his hand around my waist and jolting my body towards his in one sharp tug. “You’re better at this than you think.” He stated.