#aliah

          The High Priestess: One thing they wish they knew

“…” The Essence is silent for several moments after hearing the question, cold crimson glaring at the one who posed it.

“I wish I had known then what I do now. That I hadn’t spent five hundred years believing in an empty promise. That I hadn’t spent a thousand years praying for something that was never going to happen. That so much of my life hadn’t been wasted hoping for idealistic endings that were impossible from the start.“

“…I wish I had known about this monster that lives inside me before things got so out of hand. Maybe then, her father wouldn’t have…”

“Something I wish I knew?” She repeats, frowning slightly. “Hmm…I don’t think there’s anything currently…” Placing a finger on her lips, she ponders the matter for a moment. “…Though…”

“I guess I wish I knew that would be the last time I’d ever get to see him.“ She falls silent as her gaze lowers. “To get the chance to tell him how much he meant to me, and how much I enjoyed spending time with him…”

“Now I’ll never get to tell him how I feel.”

“Something I wish I knew? Hm. Nothing in particular really. I make it a habit to know about all that’s happening under my watch. Why do you think I keep a close eye on Raiya and that girl? I know there’s something…different…about them. Stumbling onto these two was quite fortunate. I can’t wait to see what other mysteries they have hidden within them.”

The blonde woman is silent at first, as if contemplating the question. After a moment of silence, she lets out a sigh, before donning a frown, and in a flat tone, she speaks up.

“I wish I’d known how much of a pain in the ass it was going to be working for him…”

“…”The short woman is silent for a moment, what was once a smile, now shifting into a pained grimace. “…I…” At a loss for words, the brunette clutches one of her arms, eyes reflecting the guilt she felt at the thoughts that entered her mind. “…I know it’s selfish of me to think this…but…at times…I wish I had known that one of children had contracted this disease…if we…if we had known, maybe there was something we could have done…” Tears well up in the corners of her eyes as she recalls the horrors she endured, watching as one by one, the kids that she cared for died, and soon, she would follow suit. “Maybe if we had…i-isolated them…maybe we could have prevent it from spreading to the rest of us…” Tears slide down her cheeks at the thought of such a thing. However, she knew in her heart that she wouldn’t have been able to do such a thing. She was too kind for that. “Maybe if we had known before any of us got sick…maybe we could have all made it…” Her face contorts in pain as the tears flow freely down her face. Was it my fault? Was it because I took care of them all? Did…did I…pass it on to the other children…? And who else did I infect before I was told about my condition? “…I-I’m sorry…I need some time to myself…if you’ll excuse me…” She says as she swiftly departs, not wanting anyone to see her break down into a fit of sobs.

“I wish I knew why my memory is like this.” She says with confusion and concern on her face. “Like, everything seems fine, but when I try to think too deeply about it, things don’t add up.” A small groan emanates from the blonde as she wracks her brain trying to figure out how to explain it. “Like for example, if someone asks me about my parents, what they were like…I…can’t remember. All the details are hazy. That’s not normal, right? What’s wrong with me…”

The researcher looks up from his desk as a frown creases his face. He’s silent, as if he was reminded of bad memories. “I wish I hadn’t been so foolish. I should have put my foot down, and not let them rush development, perhaps then I would have known…”

“Mm, I do sometimes wish I knew more about my husband’s family and his upbringing, he doesn’t like to talk about it much.”

The scarred woman turns around, a scowl on her face, as though she didn’t like what had been asked. “…I wish I had known that accident would happen, I would have never suggested we volunteer…” She averts her eyes as she mutters to herself. “…I’m so sorry Blaire…”

“I wish I had known the consequences of my freedom before I had taken even a single human life. It took me too long to realize the cost of being so selfish, and three souls were erased thanks to that. I regret each one of them. I snuffed them out before they got a chance to even live…” She trails off, a pained expression upon her face. “That is why I have sworn to never let such a thing happen ever again. No more shall I live at the expense of others. My kin who freely abuse humanity, as if they’re no more than toys for us to play with, dolls crafted for us to occupy, I will never forgive them. If it is within my power, I swear to put an end to their cruelty, so that no more human lives will be lost to their greed. That, is how I shall atone for the sins I have committed.”

“I wish I had known what it was I felt for Eliyah before it was too late. I am such a fool for not realizing it sooner…and because of that, I have hurt him…I never wanted that…”

“I wish I had known that she felt the same as I, perhaps if I had known sooner, then I could have prevented that marriage from happening. Maybe then, she would still be alive…”

“I wish there was something I could have done to save him…from himself, from that demon, from fate itself……And now…he’s gone…” Her voice is shaky as she speaks, as if she was trying desperately to hold back tears. “I miss him…”

“There is nothing I wish I knew. I am content as I am. While I might have been defeated, it means little. I will never give up in my quest for revenge.” If she had the capability for it anymore, she likely would have expressed the desire to know that her husband had turned against her and that the result would be the death of her son, but such a thought doesn’t cross her mind now. Or rather, it can’t. She has purified herself, and all that remains is her grudge against the Lunarians. Regret, remorse, guilt…all of it is lost to her now.

“…I wish I had known about my powers before they first surfaced. Maybe my parents wouldn’t have died if we had known about them. If I knew how to control them back then, maybe I would have been able to have a happy life.”

“…” The rokurokubi casts a sideways glance at the one who posed the question, before returning her attention to her current task. “…Nothing really.” She mutters. No further answer comes, so it appears she either has no answer, or is refusing to give one.

“Something I wish I knew? Hmm. I suppose that would be that my home was to be swallowed up by a sealed land, and me along with it. A warning would have been nice.”

“………” The android is silent for several moments, staring with empty eyes for nearly a minute before she speaks up. “I wish I had known we were disposable to them. Maybe if we’d known how it would end up, we could have abandoned our mission before anyone died. Then, they’d still be here…”

“I wish I could have gotten to know Aster…” He would say more, but the question was specifically about something he wished he knew rather than any wish at all.

“There are many things I don’t know, things I am obvious to. It’s come to my attention that I’m far too naive. There’s much I have to learn.” He pauses, letting out a sigh. “I wish I knew more about the world, about the things around me, the people around me. I want to know why.”

Working on ‘redesigning’ my oc, Aliah.

Not so much of a redesign as it is just fffucken drawing him again, haha. Even if it is just messy sketches.