#aetherlight

@aetherlight​ said:  that’s not what i fucking said and you know it [ to jin... from haru ]

Things had not been good for a few days. Tension was building. Each had grievances that had begun to stack up. The honeymoon period was over and now it was marriage and parenting full time. Their mistakes were beginning to catch up with them. The foundation of their relationship had always been questionable. Neither expected it to be easy and blissful forever, but neither had expected things to sour so fast over such minor concerns. It was death by a thousand papercuts, or so they say. Lost sleep from the toddler’s frequent resistance to bedtime, disagreements about how to organize their home, Jin’s increasing boredom as a stay at home step parent, Haru’s increasingly frequent late nights out and Jin’s suspicion at his lackluster explanations all started to bear down on them. A healthier couple might talk it out like adults, but neither ever did. The chances that Haru or Jin even knew how to approach such a conversation were slim. Various traumas and insecurities sat beneath the surface of each man, tugging them into less than ideal patterns of non-communication.

The kids were the only thing that kept them from outright arguing, but they were with their mother that weekend. Alone, with only their resentment, they were slowly boiling and in danger of spilling over. They were pulling on a thread, stretching it to its limit, until finally it snapped. 

He could handle the awkward silences. He could handle Haru complaining about minor things to vent his frustration. He could even handle the occasional argument here and there. What he couldn’t handle was feeling disrespected. When he heard those words, he slammed the wooden cutting board in his hands down onto the rock solid granite countertop with a deafening crash.

“Don’t swear at me,” he barked, “don’t even go there.”

He walked away from the counter and leaned against the archway into the kitchen. He took a few deep breaths before turning to glare at his husband. He was about to start pacing around in a futile attempt to exorcise the angry energy that coursed through him.

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@aetherlight​ sent: “   i  was  gonna  tell  you  tonight .   ”  haru to jin

All of the colour had drained from Jin’s face. He’d always suspected Haru had some sort of secret. He was out late, he had shit excuses, and came home tired in a way he didn’t expect a businessman to be tired after a night at the office. For a while he had suspected an affair. After all, cheating on his spouse was how Haru ended up meeting Jin. If they’ll cheat with you, they’ll cheat on you. That much he could live with. That much he could anticipate. But this was different.

“I just can’t fucking believe you let me marry you and didn’t tell me,” he said, hands shaking. Now he was scared. Scared of the man he loved. Scared of the man he wanted to have a family with. He felt like he’d slipped into another dimension.

The shirt was covered in blood. Not a little, a lot. A lethal amount. Whoever bled this much hadn’t survived. Whoever bled this much was laying dead somewhere, in some ditch or warehouse or at the bottom of the Hudson River. The blood was only partially dry. Some of it had gotten on Jin’s hands when he went to unpack Haru’s gym bag and do his laundry. He never should have fucking opened it.

His breaths were shallow. His shoulders shook. Tears welled in his eyes. He knew there was a catch to this life. The money, the perfect husband, the perfect kids. There had to be something. He assumed it was an affair. He assumed it was Haru’s multitude of issues, things they should’ve gone to therapy for long ago. It was so much worse than he could have ever imagined. His husband was a murderer. His husband built this life, this empire, taking lives to build up theirs.

The room felt so empty now. The high ceilings and modern fixtures of the penthouse were surreal. The dim light overhead cast a warm glow over the sleek coffee table, the tall bookshelves, and the couch they sat on. He had pushed himself to the end, away from Haru, his legs unable to hold him up. He tried to keep his voice low, a pained whisper. The kids were asleep down the hall.

@aetherlight​ sent: ❛ it’s okay, you can touch me. ❜ [ ivan and cas........ <3 ]

Cas smiled half heartedly. The sounds of the restaurant around them were a constant murmur; plates and cutlery clanked and clattered, people held conversations all around, gentle music played from the speakers while the TV over the bar mumbled out football game results and commentary. It was a pretty typical night except for the fact that Cas was on a date with man, in public, for the first time. Alone. Just them. No double date, no at home movies, but totally publicly exposed. Or so he would say. 

He took a sip of his water, his hand on the table a few inches from Ivan’s. He wanted to hold it, to stroke his thumb, to feel warm skin against warm skin. Wasn’t that the whole point of dating someone? To get close, to get comfortable, to find love? He would never have hesitated to hold Nora’s hand at a restaurant, but this was different and those days had long since passed him by. He hadn’t dated at all since the divorce, but now that he was doing so honestly as his truest self it was more nerve wracking than it ever was before. This time the stakes felt higher.

18. Aetherlight - Mt. Wolf

Next up at number 18 is a stunning debut album that may have slipped under the radar for some people this year - Aetherlight from Mt. Wolf. When Mt. Wolf first broke onto the scene back in 2011, they were hotly tipped by a number of music publications to really make an impact -  however creative differences caused the band to split in 2013 and it looked like it wasn't going to happen for the London-based outfit. Now reformed as a three-piece however, Mt. Wolf's debut has finally arrived and it really does overdeliver on the early promise that the band showed. Seamlessly fusing elements of folk, indie rock and ambient electronica to make for some truly mesmeric instrumentals, if you think Sigur Ros meets Fleet Foxes meets Bon Iver then you won’t be far off Mt. Wolf’s near-angelic sound. Add to this Sebastian Fox's ethereal vocal lines and what Aetherlight ultimately gives the listener is just a real sense of beauty that few other albums this year, or any year for that matter, could offer. 

Review: Aetherlight – Mt. Wolf (2017)

A magnificent musical odyssey by the U.K.’s answer to Sigur Ros with an alternative bent. Mt. Wolf’s Aetherlight is an emotive, intoxicating experience drenched in atmosphere and sincerity. A real gem on the 2017 release slate.

Since 2012’s stunning debut of Life Sized Ghosts, the trio that is Mt. Wolf  (Sebastian Fox, Stevie Red McMinn, Al Mitchell) have forged a career on swirling soundscapes…

Mt. Wolf began in 2011 as three guys with a leading female vocalist. By 2014 they were gaining significant buzz and then Kate, the girl, decided she was over it. The band broke up. 

A year later the guys decide to keep it going. Sebastian 'Bassi' Fox became the frontman. He had a solid voice but decided to give falsetto a try to take the place of their missing lady. It worked. It more than worked, in fact, it’s lovely.

I first stumbled upon Mt. Wolf back in 2015 with their song VIII featuring Alexa Harley. It joined my Smatterings of Favorites playlist in April of 2015. But I never really looked into them more. Over the weekend as I was listening to the playlist, the song came on and I became curious to know and hear more.