#admitting feel

DAY ONE

The sky was grey and overcast. A light breeze whispered in the wind. And the town of Magnolia was still once more.

It had been almost three weeks since the battle of Alverez. Tirelessly, the wizards of Fairy Tail worked on the repairs to the war-torn land, initially focussing on their guildhall before diverting their resources towards helping the rest of the town. A great debt was owed to the citizens of Magnolia. Yet again they had been pulled into a war that had nothing to do with them, and yet again they had stood by their side, holding not an ounce of blame towards their resident guild. It was only fair for Fairy Tail to send their greatest workers far and wide across the city, helping wherever they went.

It was getting late. Most of Natsu’s friends had disappeared their separate ways, filled with a need to either soothe aching muscles in baths or calm their minds with a strong drink. The dragon slayer, on the other hand, was still walking. After an exhausting day making the final repairs inside the guildhall - which he had, admittedly, almost singlehandedly demolished in the first place – he began to take in the work the rest of his fellow mages had achieved. He had to admit that Magnolia was starting to look beautiful again, both inside and out. The people smiled more, they saw the Fairy Tail symbol and greeted the wizards as old friends. The days were long, the work was hard, but at the end of it, it was worth it to see the things that had once been broken were beginning to mend.

He absently watched as the busy streets of bustling stalls turned to long winding roads of plain houses. The damage here seemed a distant memory in these old stone houses. Even before the war, Natsu had never had much reason to venture this direction, but still he knew the route like the back of his hand. All the way to a seemingly uninteresting townhouse.

"Hello, Natsu-san."

"Hey, Juvia. I should have known you'd be around," he greeted the water witch with a kind and wide smile as always.

Natsu was so used to the combined harmony with his target, he'd almost missed that there was a second scent all along. Juvia Lockser sat opposite the house he had been staring into, as she obviously had been for quite some time. The whole setup seemed strange, but nothing unexpected from the rain woman. She had a flask on one side, filled with some cool liquid gaining condensation, a couple of bags by her feet, and a box of food on her lap. A heavenly scent filled the air from the perfectly steamed dumplings; obviously she had taken some time to improve her previously questionable cooking. Just as he was about to remark on her preparation, the young woman dragged another of the bags forward, pulling out a circular tub which matched the one that she had on her own lap. "Would you like something to eat?" she asked, lifting it up to the dragon slayer.

He couldn't refuse, even if he wanted to. Not while the smell of her meal was in the air, warm dumplings that were somehow still steaming fresh. He could feel his mouth watering just looking at it, eagerly taking the box into his hands. "Thanks!" he said, surprised but taking a seat beside her. "This, uh, isn't gonna have Gray's face on it or anything, is it?" he asked, opening the box cautiously.

Juvia's own face turned bright red, but she shook her head quickly. "Juvia could never let Natsu eat Gray-sama!"

It wouldn't have stopped him, but it would have made him feel slightly more awkward to take the meal. He took a pair of chopsticks from her, snapping them open and eagerly picking up the first piece. The rush of salt and spices mixed with the soft bounce of texture, and it really did taste just as amazing as it smelt. "Oh my god, this is so good! Did you make this for Gray?" he asked with a full mouth.

"Mhmm. Juvia would love to go inside and give some to Gray!" she announced without so much of a heartbeat of hesitation. But then, she sighed. Her chopsticks lowered in her hand and her gaze dropped. "But Gray-sama doesn't want to see Juvia today."

Natsu frowned to himself. That didn't exactly sound very nice. "He said that?"

"No, but he didn't invite Juvia inside," she said, as if no other explanation were needed. "Maybe you'll have more luck. Would you like a drink?”

Natsu took one look at what appeared to be a freezing cold drink in Juvia’s hand, no doubt made for very different taste buds to his own. He scrunched up his nose. “No thanks. So, you’re not going in, just because he didn’t invite you inside? Did you knock?”

“Well, Gray-sama knows that Juvia is outside. When Gray-sama wants to see his Juvia, then he will come out and invite her into his home. If he sees that Natsu-san is here too, he might invite is both inside. Although… Juvia is surprised you even know where Gray-sama's house is."

"What do you mean by that?" Natsu asked, leaning back and waiting. That almost sounded accusing.

"Natsu has never been here before."

"That's not true!"

"Yes, it is. Juvia has never seen you here."

"That doesn't mean I haven't been here!" Yes, it did. He knew it did, just as he knew it was true. Once, he may have known this familiar route from muscle memory and childhood games, but now it was scent alone that brought him to this doorstop.

Juvia hummed to herself in thought. She, unlike the vast majority of Fairy Tail, didn't seem willing to argue with Natsu. "So, if you don't mind Juvia asking… what are you doing here now?"

That was an excellent question. "No reason." Juvia's eyebrows raised, and Natsu's frown deepened. Even he knew that that wasn’t a valid explanation. He shrugged his shoulders instead, the first excuses he could think of flying out of his mouth; "I didn't see him at the guild today, that's all."

"Juvia didn’t think that many people were still at the guild… Gray-sama was repairing Kardia Cathedral today," Juvia offered helpfully.

"Ah, that makes sense," Natsu said to himself. It hadn't been too badly damaged compared to the other buildings and livelihoods, but Gray had a connection to the religious building. And the guildhall was so close to completion, having an entire guild crawling over it usually did more harm than good.

"Is that the only reason?" Juvia pressed.

She was persistent, he would give her that. "What about you? If you know you're not going to go inside, what are you doing here?" he asked instead, turning the question back onto the rain woman.

"Juvia doesn't have to go inside to know she is with her Gray-sama," she said, sounding almost proud. Her eyes glittered as she stared up at the window, the one that Natsu could only assume would be Gray's bedroom and most likely where he was in now. "If Juvia stays here, then Gray-sama will know that Juvia is here for him, whenever he wants her! Juvia will always be there for Gray-sama."

There was something almost kind of sweet about that, even if it was in their own special way. "Well, then, maybe that's why I'm here too," Natsu said thoughtfully.

"Natsu is in love with Gray-sama too?!" Juvia's eyes widened, a glare resembling that of a wild animal. Her body posture had completely changed now. Every muscle had tensed, the empty container was held close to her chest as she eyed the last of Natsu's food, wondering if she would learn to regret lending both her meal and perfect position to the ‘love rival'.

"What?! No!!" he quickly spat out. She had gone from adorable to terrifying in the blink of an eye, and any response but that would have left him boiled alive. "I meant the other stuff! You know, being there and- stuff."

Juvia was not so easily convinced. "Juvia doesn't understand…" she said stiffly,

Neither did Natsu, but he wasn't going to admit as much. "It's nothing. I was just going to, you know, talk about missions – yeah, that's right. A new mission. When the guild is back."

"Oh…" Juvia said slowly, still giving Natsu a slightly wary look but at least deciding that calmed the worst of her fears. "So, if it is not to confess your love… why haven't you gone inside yet?"

"I was eating! And being nice to you!" he insisted. But the question still caught himself off-guard. Because in a way, Juvia was right; he should have gone straight in. Talking to Juvia wasn't an excuse, it had been a distraction, one that had long since lost its potency now they had been sitting together for a few minutes.

He sat upright, ready to go. But didn’t stand up.

"Is something wrong?"

"No!" Natsu shook his head quickly. Nothing was wrong. It was fine. He needed to go in there and-

"You've never done this before, have you?" Juvia asked quietly.

He hadn't expected her to say anything, especially not that. How was it that he felt so completely lost even as her eyes seemed clearer than ever? "Never done what?"

"Being a friend," Juvia said with a soft smile, before quickly holding up her hands before Natsu could begin to shout at her. "Juvia knows that Natsu-san has always been great at motivating and cheering people on and making so many friends. Maybe even better than Gray-sama-"

"Definitely better than Gray-sama…" Natsu mumbled under his breath.

"-And from all that Juvia has seen, Natsu-san has always been there to fight alongside his friends. But you are also very good at fighting people that you love. It’s who you are. Fairy Tail loves Natsu-san… but… have you ever told anyone that you love them?"

"I already said I don't-!!"

"As your best friend, Natsu."

"…Oh."

He bit back in a sullen, angry silence at that statement. Because the implication was just completely untrue. He was an amazing friend. He had always been an amazing friend. He was the one who stood by the people he loved when there seemed like no hope. He would scream and shout until they got back onto their feet and kept fighting. How was that not telling someone that they loved them?

Besides, Gray didn't have to hear something like that. He got punched often enough to know that he was loved.

"I think that Gray-sama would love to hear that you care about him. As a friend."

If the last three words weren't said in such a terrifying, warning tone, her sentiment might have been the one of the nicest things that Natsu had ever heard. It was just a shame that he didn't believe it. "Yeah, he's not gonna care about that," he said, rubbing the back of his neck beneath his scarf. His muscles ached for rest, while his mind begged for escape. He looked up at the sky, watching the horizon turning a deep crimson. It was starting to get late, and his mind was failing to connect his words to his feelings anymore. “I bet he'd want to hear it from you, though."

"You really think so?!" Juvia gasped, his eyes suddenly lit up like Christmas.

"Sure, of course. He adores you," he said.

Suddenly, everything in his body was just done with the rest of the day. Like a light switch turning off. The sky suddenly seemed to be vanishing into darkness, the muscles in his body all unanimously screamed for rest. He didn’t understand why every cell in his body had suddenly turned against him, when all he’d been doing was having a pleasant conversation with the smitten woman. The two simply couldn’t have been connected.

He stood sharply, passing Juvia's food container back to her. "Thanks for the meal, Juvia. I'll see you at the guild tomorrow. Or the Cathedral?"