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âIâm... trying,â Hannah grumbled, annoyed and feeling patronized by her friend. If she wasnât nearing the end of a double shift at the Leaky Cauldron she might have given Neville some grace and seen his advice as coming from a good place, rather than getting irritated by what felt like another person criticizing her life choices. âNot all of us are regarded as war heroes.â
Four years later and she hadnât processed all the trauma they had gone through in that penultimate year, let alone her motherâs murder the year prior. Hannah had dreamt of becoming a healer and working at St. Mungoâs but her life hadnât taken that path. Sheâd taken the entrance exams right after graduation and her scores were too low to be accepted into the program. Afterwards sheâd told herself and all her friends she took the job at the Leaky for money while she studied to retake the exams, but here she was all those years later, serving still firewhiskey and not progressing towards that goal. âMy shift isnât over yet, I need to get back. Hereâs your butterbeer,â she told Neville as she slammed it down on the table hard enough for a good third to slosh over the sides.Â
I love your Abbottom! Could you write some more, for Neville's birthday please? :)
Now on AO3!
âAnd he still has absolutely no idea?â
âNone at all,â Hannah says, and they exchange conspiratorialglances which they quickly wipe off their faces as Neville re-enters the room.Augusta Longbottom wipes invisible crumbs off the coffee table, and Hannah smoothsout invisible creases in her skirt.
âThanks again for the cake, Gran,â he says. âAnd Iâlldefinitely get a lot of wear out of those new wellies. But I think itâs timefor me and Hannah to goâour reservationâs at seven.â
âYeah,â Hannah cuts in apologetically. âAbout that. Neville,Iâm so, so sorry but whilst you were in the bathroom, a message came throughfrom the pub. Everyone whoâs supposed to be on tonight has come down with somebug, and theyâve got absolutely no one there, and itâs such a nice day thattheyâre bursting at the seams. Tom practically begged me to come inâthereâs noone else, and heâll have to close otherwise.â
His intense disappointment is clear, but, to his credit,thinks Hannah, he doesnât for a moment suggest that she refuse to go in andhelp out, even though it is hisbirthday and the two of them have had this meal booked at the newly-opened andvery fancy restaurant at the other end of Diagon Alley for weeks.
At least as far as he knows.
âWhat a bummer,â he says.
âI know,â she sighs. âBut, look, what I was thinking was,you should come in with me, and then the minute it looks like itâs gettingquiet or if Tom manages to contact someone else, we can go to our table, andââ
âOh, no, itâs fine,â Neville says. âI donât mind staying tokeep you company, Gran. I couldnât help but see those greenhouses earlierâyourflutterby bushes are in a terrible state, and I could get a headstart on pruningthem back.â
âCome on, you canât spend your birthday doing that,â Hannahsays, cajoling. âLook, I bet Tomâs just exaggerating. Iâll help him out fortwenty minutes, get things calmed down, and then weâll head off. You just comewith me, and weâll leave as soon as we can.â
âHonestly, I donât mind,â Neville says. âThereâll be otherbirthdays, and besides, thereâs Harryâs party tomorrow and we canât miss that.You just go and do your job, and Iâll see you tonight. You donât mind mestaying, do you Gran?â
Hannah shoots a look of panic at Augusta Longbottom behindhis back, but she underestimates her. âNeville Longbottom,â the older womansays severely. âI do mind very muchthat you are going to leave your young lady in the lurch like this! If thingsare as bad as Tom says they areâand, poor dear, he sounded absolutely frantic,and at his age, too, that canât be good for his heart! Anyway, if things are asbad as he says they are, you should absolutely go and lend a hand. And if, asHannah suggests, itâs actually much better, the two of you can leave early, andhave a wonderful evening almost as planned. Sheâs a very sensible girl, yourHannah, and youâd do well to listen to her!â
âWell,â Neville says, shrugging, âI guess I canât argue withthat. To the Leaky?â
âThanks, love,â Hannah says, reaching up to kiss him on thecheek. âAnd Iâm sorry things arenât going to go as planned. Youâre onlytwenty-one once, I know, so Iâm sorry itâs turned out this way.â
âThereâll be other birthdays,â Neville shrugs. âItâs fine.â
She squeezes his hand. âIâll floo through first, and see youthere when youâve said goodbye to your gran properly. Goodbye, Mrs Longbottom!âShe widens her eyes slightly, trying to add a thank you, and she thinks Augustagets it, because when Neville has his back to her, busy helping Hannah into thefireplace, she gives her two big thumbs up, and Hannah has to bite the insideof her cheek to stop herself laughing out loud. She steps into the floo, statesher destination, and scrambles out as fast as she can at the other end.
âFinally!â
âWe were beginning to think youâd got lost!â
âIs he coming?â
âHow long have we got?â
âEveryone, QUIET!â Hannah roars, with the practised ease ofa bartender. She breaks into a smile at the sight: all of Nevilleâs friends,crowded into the Leaky, standing in front of a huge banner with Happy BirthdayNeville (courtesy of Dean Thomas) and stacks and stacks of presents. The wholeold-DA crowd is there, along with loads of their other friends and relations,and Ginny and Harry are stationed behind the bar (open, courtesy of Harry) togive Hannah a night off. âNevilleâs on his way,â she adds, slightlyunnecessarily. She grins. âThanks, everyone. NowâŠlights?â
She addresses this last to Ron, who obligingly flicks hisDeluminator, and the pub is plunged into darkness, the curtains having beendrawn in advance by some thoughtful person. They wait for a beatâfor two beats,three, and thenâ
âHello? Ow! Bugger. Whyâs it so dark?â
âSURPRISE!â
Ron flicks the lights back on, and everyone cheersâthen laughs,seeing how genuinely surprised Neville looks. They all start singing thebirthday song as Lavender and Parvati bring out a cake, complete with 21candles, and Neville, still stunned, glances over at Hannah. She smiles,pushing him forwards towards the cake. He takes the surprise well, waving andnodding and winking at people, but as they finish singing, and give him threecheers, he reaches behind and loops a hand around Hannahâs wrist, holding ontight. He blows out the candles, starts thanking people, chatting and laughingwith them, but the whole time, he doesnât let go of her hand.
Everyone converges on them en masse, and he blinks. âHEM HEM.â Everyone turns, and looks backover at Ginny, now kneeling on the bar. She rings the little bell there. âThebar is now officially open!â Thereâs a slight pause, then at least half oftheir friends surge towards it. Ginny looks delighted, jumping down andpositioning herself behind the Butterbeer taps. âIâve always wanted to dothat!â
Lavender and Parvati procure a knife from somewhere andstart slicing up and handing out birthday cake; Harry and Ginny are doingsterling service at the bar, and the rest of their friends are lining up towish Neville a happy birthday and to hand him gifts. Heâs just thanked Hermioneand Ron for the hand-knitted scarf (complete with tiny mimbulus mimbletonia print) when thereâs a slight gap in the sheernumber of people headed towards them, so he turns to Hannah, properly, for thefirst time since he got to the pub.
âWhat,â he asks, unable to keep the smile off his face, âisall this about?!â
âWell,â says Hannah. âDâyou remember a few weeks ago, when Iasked you what you wanted to do for your birthday?â
ââŠhonestly? Not really.â
âLet me fill you inâŠâ
*
It had just been a passing comment really. School wasnearly, but not quite, out for the summer, so sheâd come up to see him atHogwarts during the day on her break. Heâd been frazzled, caught between aclass of second years and fourth years, neither of whomâofficially, atleastâwere supposed to be slacking off, as they were both returning as normalnext year. But, with only three days left of the school year, everyone was hyperactivewith excitement and badly behaved, and keeping them under control had been achallenge. When sheâd asked him about his birthday, in a vague attempt todistract him from his woes, he hadnât really been listening.
âOh, you know,â heâd said, waving a hand. âWhatever. Iâm notfussed. Weâll be going out the day after, anyway.â
âWe will?â Hannah asked, slightly confused. They had noplans that she could remember.
âYeah,â heâd said, talking more to the Mandrakes he wasgrowing than to her. âHarry always does something for his birthday; weâll goalong to that the day after, and so will everyone else. Thereâs no pointarranging something else, and asking people to comeâno one will want to be outtwo days in a row.â
He hadnât said it maliciously, she was keen to point out toHarry, later. He didnât secretly hate Harry for stealing his limelight; hedidnât mean it maliciously, and he certainly wasnât disappointed that that wasthe way things were. He was just stating the facts. Harry, always generous tohis friends, always threw a party for his birthday, and with Nevilleâs beingthe day beforeâŠwell, it just didnât make sense to invite the same people outthe day before. So Harry had had the big party, and Neville had done somethingquiet the day before. Thatâd just been how it had been, since they finished at school.
Harry had been genuinely horrified, though, that Nevillemight feel put out by this, and it had taken Hannah and Ginny quite a while totalk him down. When they finally had, Harry had immediately suggested that theythrow a party for Neville this year and let everyone know it was him, notHarry, they were celebrating.
âGreat minds,â Hannah had said, tapping her headconspiratorially. She had happened to catch the two of them in the Leaky bychance later that evening, after seeing Neville, and sheâd had plenty of chanceto plan something before stumbling across them.
âHow about,â Ginny said slowly, sipping her Gillywater, âhowabout we make it a surprise party?â
âLike I say,â Hannah said, âgreat minds. I was thinking wecould ask the usual crowd, only get them to come on the thirtieth, not thethirty-first.â
âBut we could tell Neville we were going to have it on thethirty-first, for Harry,â Ginny said, nodding enthusiastically. âAnd you couldtell him that, I donât know, the two of you were going out for dinner orsomething on his birthdayââ
âExactly, and if he heard anything from anyone else, if theylet it slip by mistake, heâd just assume theyâd be talking about the next day,âHannah replied. âThe only thing is: where would we have it?â
Ginny blinked. âYeah, itâs not like we know anyone who ownsa pub or anything,â she said, sticking her tongue out at Hannah.
âI donât own the pub,â she replied. âBut, okay, sure, youâreright. If I asked, Tomâd close it for the night for us lot. He books outfunctions all the time. We could have it here.â
Ginny clapped her hands. âItâs settled then!â sheâd said,beaming at Hannah.
Harry had immediately offered to cover the cost of an openbar, and Hannah had arranged the food. When theyâd told everyone the plan, allof their friends had been in immediately, promising to keep it all a secretfrom Neville.
And they all promised other things, too.
To make a banner, like Dean had. To bake a cake, likeLavender and Parvati. Lee Jordan had offered to bring his decks and DJ; GeorgeWeasley had offered balloons and party poppers and other such items from theWheezesâ party range. People who didnât have something to offer asked what hewanted for his birthday, or just promised to turn up, looking delighted at thethought. And Hannah had been so touched by how much everyone cared forNevilleâbut not as touched, she knew, as he would be.
*
Now, the partyâs been going on for a good couple of hours,and everyone is having an absolutely amazing time. Hannah knows this becauseeveryone keeps coming up to her and Neville, and telling them so. They alsokeep buying him drinksâor at least pressing Harry to give him another.
âDonât worry,â Harry tells her, âIâm switching every otherone with water. Iâm not having him be massively hungover for my birthday.â Hetips her an enormous wink as he says this, but she knows heâs kidding, becausefor his birthday, he and Ginny have a reservation for dinner at the fancyrestaurant, and, he says, are looking forward to a quite night for a change.Sheâd watched, earlier, as Neville had gone over to him, and Harry had slappedhim on the back and said something to him which made him laugh, and sheâdsmiled, even though she couldnât hear it.
Over their months together, Nevilleâs told her a thing ortwo about Harry, and this old prophecy, and the life he, Neville, could haveled. She knows how theyâre tied together, those two boysâbut sheâs glad Nevilleis who he is. Sheâd stick by him no matter what, if it came to it, but shedoesnât think she has it in her to be a Ginny Weasley.
Who is, she notes, doing a fantastic job at the bar. If shedidnât have ten Galleons on the Harpies winning the League again this year,sheâd try to poach her. Neville is currently dancing the Hippogriff withLunaâeveryone is giving them an incredibly large berthâand sheâs so enthralledwith watching them that she doesnât notice the person come up to tap her on theshoulder and say helloâat least at first.
She works out pretty quickly that Harry and Ginny had toldHagrid about the party, who in turn appears to have informed a few of hiscolleaguesâwho are, of course, Nevilleâs colleagues tooâabout the party, andshe thinks its lovely that theyâve turned out for Neville. Still, it isnâtevery day that you have to try to hold a conversation with your oldTransfiguration teacher stroke boyfriendâs current boss after several glassesof elf-made wine. She likes to think sheâs doing a good job, as Professor McGonagallis nodding along and answering her questions normally, and sheâs just asked herif sheâs seen Professor Sprout recently, whenâ
âSUPRESSOR MCGONAGALL!â Neville lurches over to them,beaming. âHow LOVELY to see you. Many happy returns of the day.â He hiccups,still beaming, and Hannah hastily turns her laugh into a hacking cough.
âMany happy returns of the day to you, too,â theHeadmistress replies, masking a grin of her own. âBut, please. Iâve told youbeforeâdo call me Minerva. And if that is too much, Professor will do nicely.â
Neville nods. âOf course. Yes. Good.â He hiccups again,closes his eyes, then seems to visibly sober up. âOh, Merlin. Hello, Minerva.Have you come to fire me for being drunk and in charge?â
âMy dear Professor Longbottom, need not worry. You areclearly not in charge of anything,âProfessor McGonagall says, smiling. âI have come, however, to wish you a veryhappy birthday.â
Neville thanks her. âIâm so glad youâre not going to fire mefor brining the good name of Hogwarts into ill-repute,â he manages, a sentencewhich would impress Hannah at the best of times, let alone right now.
Professor McGonagall eyes him beadily. âI would onlyconsider that you were bringing the good name of Hogwarts into ill-repute if I heardthat it was your birthday and you were notsuitably celebrating,â she says. They take a moment to work this out. âAs itis,â she gestures around, âyou seem to be doing a fine job. Well done. I shallbe sure to mention this on your Annual Review. Now. Do you think it might bepossible to get a small Firewhiskey?â
âComing right up,â Harry, who has been listening in, says, pullingout a glass and a very full bottle. âJust say when!â
Hannah meets Nevilleâs eye, and the two of them burst intolaughter yet again. âCome on,â Neville says, âletâs dance.â He pulls her on tothe dancefloor, and they sway together for a moment. âSo,â he says, âyou didall this?â
She shrugs. âI had help,â she says.
He kisses her, softly and quickly. âThanks,â he says.
She smiles, and kisses him back just as quickly. âYouârewelcome,â she says. And then, âYou deserve it.â And the party goes onâand on.
Hello everyone! Welcome to the first ever Chubby Neville mini fest, created to celebrate and appreciate chubby Neville. :)
Guideline
All submissions need to be Neville centric.
Neville needs to be portrayed as chubby in all works.
We kindly ask that the submissions are created in a body positive perspective. If youâre unsure whether or not your idea fits, feel free to reach us.
This is not an anonymous or an exchange fest.
You have until the 12th of February 2018 to create your works for the fest.
Submissions can be of any length, detail, or rating. Explicit works are welcome but not a requirement.
All pairings are welcome! Including M/M, M/F, multi and gen works without any pairing.Â
Please make sure you use appropriate tags and warnings.
If youâre interested, sign up using this form!
Posting
Works should be posted to the Chubby Neville AO3 collection that will be available on the preceding Saturday. There will be a post about this at the start of the weekend, the mods will also be contacting everyone who signed up through the form to make sure they donât miss it. If you need any technical help, let us know and weâll be happy to help you.
The collection will remain open for posting after the deadline. Please feel free to keep posting, even if you couldnât attend the fest! Just post your work to the collection, send us a message, and itâll be added to the masterlist. You can use the â#chubby neville festâ tag on tumblr as well.Â
Please help us spread the word by reblogging this post and letting people around you know!
For futher questions, message us on tumblr or at [email protected].
I feel like I've probably read all Abbottom (Neville X Hannah) fics, both on tumblr, on ao3 and on ff.net, some even multiple times. I would really wish it was a more popular ship, so it would be easy to find new, quality content. The same problem have been with Blackdonald and Free, but I feel like those two amazing ships are finally getting attention from the fandom.
Now I just need Abbottom to gain popularity also Pavarti X Susan, but that's probably never going to happen and then I can be completely happy. Is that too much to ask for?
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Are there any abbottom fics that you recommend? I'm mostly looking for one shots but multi-chapter is fine too :)
First of all sorry for taking such a long time to reply, I havenât used my computer in a while and I wanted to do this properly. Second of all Iâm so glad to see other people be excited about Abbottom (if you ever wanna fangirl over this adorable ship, then PM me).
Also you should totally check out my Abbottom side blog @abbottom ;)
Anyways click âkeep readingâ to see my recs
âFrom the Earthâ by @professorlongbottomm is probably my favourite multichap Abbottom fic and Iâm so excited for the next chapter.Â
 But since youâre look for one shots I can recommend checking out @remusjohnlvpin âs Abbottom tag because she writes really great Abbottom fics.
I donât really save fics, but these three were just the ones I remember reading and liking as good when I did a quick scroll through the Neville/Hannah tag on ao3.
Flowers in May
Is quite cute and also pretty short.
Collapse
Is also pretty good as far as I remember.
Here comes the sun
Is adorable and itâs based on the Beatles song which is amazing.
This nonsense is for Emily @gliisseo because she is sensational, and it is her birthday. Thank you for being you, and hereâs to many more sunny days in lovely parks :) (nb: vaguely nsfw, contains lots of euphemistic description, one mention of spiders, and a garden shed. Does not contain: any semblance of a plot. Enjoy!) Now on AO3!
âAnd what are we thinking the theme of the wedding will be?â
They exchange glances. âUm...us?â suggests Neville. âOur...selves? Our...union?â He fizzles out. The manâwedding planner? Engagement party organiser? He canât remember precisely what Gran had saidâheaves an enormous sigh and turns to Hannah.
âWhat colour scheme does Madam envisage for the main event?â
âColour scheme?â she asks. âUm...well...Madam has always liked yellow.â She adds this last in a similarly sycophantic tone, and Neville bites the inside of his cheek to keep himself from laughing out loud.
âYellow,â the man repeats, in the sort of voice you might say âchronic spattergriotâ or âexplosive diarrhoeaâ. The two of them exchange glances again, then hurriedly look away.
âPerhaps,â Gran says crisply, âI might show you the gardens whilst Neville and Hannah think very hard for a few moments about themes and colour schemes.â She glares at them both, then takes his arm, and leads him towards the flutterby bush, which is currently in bloom and looking delightful. âNow, my Neville has always had the most marvellous green thumbâit runs in the family, of courseâso we are hoping to hold the engagement party here in no less than a month, so we can take full advantage of the grounds whilst they are at their peak.â
âCertainly, Madam,â he says, and Hannah feels a touch of alarm that both she and her grandmother-in-law (to be) should addressed in the same way. And then a touch more alarm when she hears her say well, yes, just a small engagement party, two hundred and fifty guests perhaps; three hundred at the absolute most.
âWhat happened to a small shindig at the Leaky?â she hisses. âIâm sure I couldâve persuaded Tom to go for an open bar. It would only have been for the old school crowd anyway, we wouldnât have needed that much space...â
âYouâd exclude my esteemed colleague Minerva McGonagall from a party with an open bar?â he replies, incredulous. âI donât even know why Iâm marrying you.â He kisses her quickly, to make sure she knows heâs joking, but she pushes him away.
âDonât,â she warns. âYou cannot leave me alone for nearly two weeks and do things like that when I canâtâwhen we canâtâoh, stop it,â she groans. âI canât even think straight,â Neville, who has been kissing her neck, stops. She groans again. âThis isnât fair,â she whines, stomping her foot.
âI know,â he sighs. He pulls her in close, rests his chin on top of her head. âHow long before we can legitimately leave them to it?â
Hannah laughs. âIâm torn between saying, letâs fake a horrible illness and get going now, and absolute terror regarding what your Gran would agree to on our behalf if we arenât there to control things.â
âItâs fine, weâll just elope,â she says, running a finger along his jawline.
âDonât joke about that right now,â he says, swallowing.
âDonât joke about what?â She pouts and bats her eyelashes exaggeratedly. âThe two of us...running away together...somewhere where we can have completeâŠand total...privacy...â She punctuates the last three words with kisses, and he groans. It sends a shiver through her, more so when he responds by suddenly pushing her up against the gate to the back garden and kissing her with such force she forgets everything.
Sheâs fumbling for his belt and his hands are already snaking up her thighs, under her dress, when: âWould sir like the sandwiches to be left here?â
Betsy, Augusta Longbottomâs house elf, smiles brightly up at them, and Hannah leans against the wall, closing her eyes in deep, deep frustration. Neville manages to draw on deep inner reserves of politeness and suggests she goes and asks Gran what she wants done with them, and Betsy dashes off at once, but the moment has been lost entirely.
âIâm beginning to think that this is a conspiracy,â Hannah says wryly, and Neville snorts.
âI agree,â he says, sliding down the wall and sitting on the grass. Hannah sits down next to him and rests her head on his shoulder. âSo. Eloping?â
Wellâthatâs not quite true. Sheâd loved being proposed to. Sheâd loved that night. What she hadnât loved was then being separated from Neville for a fortnight. Normally he lived with her, in a set of rooms above the Leaky Cauldron, and flooâd to school every morning. This worked fine, most of the time, but the day they had gotten engaged, one of the Professors who lived at Hogwarts had had a magical mishap and had had to spend a fortnight recovering in St Mungoâs. Whilst Professor Flitwick was now very well and could return to work, when he had been away from school, Neville had had to live there because of some stupid rule about the number of teachers required on site because of staff to pupil ratios. Or something. Hannah had been so cross about it all, sheâd elected not to properly listen, so she didnât fully understand.
Heâd suggested she come up and stay there with her too, but she hadnât been able to face the knowing looks from Professor McGonagall and the other staff if sheâd done so. Or worse, what if Hagrid had caught her sneaking out in the morning? It didnât bear thinking about.
So sheâd faced their separation with resignation, and imagination, entertaining herself with fantasies about what they would get up to as soon as he returned. (And, okay, maybe a fortnight wasnât that long. Under normal circumstances, she was sure sheâd be fine. But really. They had literally just gotten engaged.)
He'd written to her on Friday night that everything had gone swimmingly in Professor Flitwickâs recovery, and the Healers were satisfied that he was fit to go back to the school. He would be arriving there, his letter said, at ten oâclock on Saturday morning, just after breakfast.
At ten fifteen, after the most cursory of congratulations on his full recovery and hand-overs, Neville had arrived at the Leaky Cauldron, where Hannah had been waiting for him, wearing nothing but the new lingerie she had brought for the occasion.
At ten twenty, there had been a knock on the door to her private quarters. They had drawn apart. âI think,â Hannah had said, slowly and carefully, âthat you should tell Tom that I have developed a headache which I intend to cultivate until at least Thursday, and will be out of commission until then. I cannot work. He will have to do without me. He should leave. And then grab one of the do-not-disturb signs from down the hall whilst youâre at it.â
âRoger that,â heâs grinned, snapping her a salute. Even seeing him leave was sort of nice, because it just heightened the anticipation. Sheâd shivered.
And then sheâd heard him say, very loudly, âOh, hello Gran! How nice to see you? You want to come in? Oh, let me get you a chair!â
âThere is no need to shout so,â sheâd heard Augusta Longbottomâs dulcet tones respond. âI may be old, but Iâm not deaf!â
Hannah had known the volume was for her benefit, so sheâd hastily thrown on a dress and walked out of the bedroom to greet her, wondering why she had come and how quickly they could reasonably as her to leave. It turned out to be worse than they could possibly imagine. Excited by their engagement, she had gotten in touch with the most in-demand wedding planner in the country (or so he claimed) whom she was now employing to plan their wedding, and, first, engagement party.
âThatâs very kind of you Gran, butââ Neville had begun, kindly but firmly.
âDidnât you get my letter? Weâve been waiting for you since ten!â
âBeen waiting for...?â heâd asked.
âThe two of you. Honestly! We have the initial planning meeting this morning, then lunch so we can show him the groundsâwe thought it best for the engagement party to be held quickly, so we can move on with the planning for the main event, so at home seems the best place for itâthen in the afternoon Hannah has a preliminary fitting with Twillfit and Tatting.â
âWhat for?â Hannah had asked dumbly.
Augusta had barely refrained from rolling her eyes. âA wedding dress, of course,â sheâd said. âHonestly, did you not get my letter explaining all of this, Neville? I sent it up to the school three days ago; do they not distribute post daily anymore?â
Hannah could tell by his face that he knew of a letter, but that he had elected not to read it. Worse, Augusta could, too. Which meant that they had had no time to concoct an excuse, and no option but to follow her to the floo, Neville muttering profuse apologies under his breath to her all the way.
Theyâd sat through a two-hour presentation from the wedding plannerâsomehow, neither of them could remember his name, which might have had something to do with the instant dislike theyâd both felt when heâd visibly deflated seeing the two of themâon themes and visions and schemes. And now they are on the âviewing the groundsâ part of the day.
âIt isnât really how Iâd imagined today going,â Hannah sighs. Neville pats her knee sympathetically, then straightens up.
âHow had you imagined today?â he asks with interest.
âWell,â she says. And then she leans in and whispers something quite lengthy into his left ear.
â...golly,â he manages, at the end of it.
âAnd then Iâd...â she twists around, climbing over his lap (golly, indeed) and whispers something else in his right ear.
When sheâs done, thereâs a very long pause. âDo you not like the sound of that?â she asks, starting to feel a little worried. Theyâre not big into, well, that kind of talk. Nevilleâs more of a doer. As it were. And she doesnât want to make him feel uncomfortable...
âWhat I donât like,â he says carefully, âis the complete and utter lack of privacy we have right now. If I didnât think it might give Gran a heart attack to walk in on us, Iâd take you right here and now and do all of that and more.â He reaches out and pulls her firmly back onto his lap, and she gasps in delight. Then realises the truth of his words, and sighs.
Except...
From the angle she is sat now, she can see a shed. A very old, run-down shed, used for storage and not much else. âWhat?â he asks, and she nods at it. He has to twist around to see it properly, cricking his neck slightly, and when he turns back to her, his face is inscrutable.
Heâll say no, of course. Heâll say he wishes they could, but they canât possibly. Heâll be regretful. She knows it.
â...race you?â he says.
He can barely get the door openâthereâs some kind of complex latch situation going on, and his hands are busy elsewhere. Laughing, she tries to help him, but her hands are busy too, and in the end, Â he manages to wriggle his wand out of a back pocket and, sheâs pretty sure, blast it open. She grabs his shirt and pulls him inside, kissing him all the while, and heâs reciprocating, kissing her and pushing her against the wall, kicking the door shut firmly behind them.
The shed contains decades of garden detritusâbroken tools, old bags of compost, empty seed trays and if she had it in her to notice such things any more, sheâd spot the cobwebs all over the place, cobwebs that are now in her hair and on her clothes and just anywhere heâs pressed her against. The spiders, in a show of discretion, have averted their many eyes.
She is desperate for him, pressing herself so hard against him sheâs half-amazed they donât meld together as one. His hands are in her hair, on the small of her back, up her dress, and hers are just as adventurous. And then he lifts her up off the ground, and she wraps her legs and arms around his torso and he pushes everything off a nearby workbench, and all but throws her down on it.
Years of rubbishâmost of it made of metalâfall to the ground, with a resounding, loud crash. The noise is enough to wrest her from the moment, and she pulls away, now nearly horizontal on the bench with his hands wrapped around the upper band of her underwear. âEverything okay?â he asks.
âEveryoneâthe noiseâtheyâll come lookingââ She can hardly speak, breathless and barely able to form sentences, but he understands at once.
âI cast a silencing spell on the door,â he says. Then he grins. âWe can make as much noise as we want.â
âOh God,â she groans, and reaches for him.
Theyâre moving together already, clothes still a barrierâbut not for long. It occurs to her, almost as though sheâs a random stranger observing the scene, that her hands are shaking so badly she can barely undo his belt buckle, but itâs not because sheâs afraid. Sheâs never felt more certain as she reaches to him again and again and again, and he meets her every time, murmuring her name over and over between kisses, and she starts to feel like she might die if she doesnât have him right now.
And then, just at the last moment, he pulls away. âEverything okay?â
She smiles. âEverything is perfect,â she promises.
âGood,â he replies. âI just wanted to check.â He leans in towards her, slowly, then at the last second pulls back again. âHey, Hannah?â
She reaches up, lacing her hands together behind his head. âYeah?â They stare at each other for a moment, and then, oh-so-quickly, he kisses the inside of her left wrist. And it is this that nearly undoes her, this sudden, ridiculous moment of intimacy, of delicacy, the kind of gesture that makes her heart sing.
âI missed you,â he says, and itâs so earnest, so honest.
âHey, Nev?â she asks.
âYeah?â he repeats.
âI really missed you, too.â And he smiles.
âI guess it helps that weâve got a whole lifetime together to make up for it, then,â he says.
âAnd no time like the present to start,â she agrees, and he considers this for a tantalisingly stretched out moment, nods once, and then crashes back into her.
Sheâs crying out for him already and he seems to realise this, because heâs on his knees, pushing her dress more fully out of the way, and she begs him to hurry. Heâs trailing kisses up her legs, starting at her ankles, moving up, caressing the back of her knees, and he reaches her inner thighs, and she thinks this cannot, cannot go on much longer or she will surely die, andâ
â...very suitable for storage, and costume changes. We can ask the fire eaters to prepare in here, then they can pop out at the right moment, andâoh!â
In the retelling of it all to Susan, Hannah will see the funny side. She will see how completely hilarious it is to be walked in on, in flagrante delicto (well, almost), in a garden shed filled with old bags of compost and broken spades, by the planner of her wedding and her grandmother-in-law (well, almost). Or at least, she likes to think she will.
Because right now, all she can feel is a burning shame. More than that. She is mortified. There is no possible explanation for this other than the obvious. There is no way they can get away with it. And whilst she is sure that, in theory, Augusta Longbottom knows that neither of them are as pure as the driven snow anymore, knowing that she knows in theory is very different to, well, spelling it out to her.
Augusta Longbottom runs in the same social circles as all of Hannahâs myriad Great-Aunts. As the sensible old ladies who come to the Leaky Cauldron to drink gillywater and lime and play a hand of whist on a Thursday afternoon. As Minerva frigging McGonagall. And she will tell all of those people what she caught that slattern Miss Abbott up to, and Hannah will never, ever live it down.
Just as sheâs about to apparate to the Ministry and book herself a one-way Portkey to Australia, if not the moon, she hears a crack, and Neville gets to his feet. The heel of her favourite pair of shoesâwell, one of themâis clutched tightly in his hand, and he holds it up for all to see.
âI did tell her that those shoes wouldnât be a bright idea, but hey, my students donât listen to me either.â He shrugs. âShe came a cropper on the gravel down by the pond, and I was sure we had some spellotape in here somewhere. Iâd hoped to do a bodge job until we could get to the cobbler in the week. But someone must have hidden it...â
Hannah closes her eyes. There is no possible way anyone will buy this, and her favourite shoes have now bitten the dust. And sheâs still not been...Merlin.
There is an absolutely excruciating pause. And then: âIn the flowerpot over on the left-hand self,â Augusta says calmly. âHoratio and I will give you some privacy whilst you see to it.â
âOf course,â Neville says faintly.
The wedding plannerâHoratio? Who knewâbustles out, and Augusta heads for the door, too. Neville and Hannah exchange disbelieving glances. Surely, surely they cannot have just gotten away with it...
Just as she reaches the shed door, she turns back and looks at them. âOh,â she adds. âIf you find an earring whilst youâre hunting it out, do let me know.â They exchange glances again, this time of confusion.
âAn...earring?â Neville asks.
âYes,â Augusta says almost dreamily. âEmerald, I recall. Claw set in gold.â Thereâs a pause. âI lost it in here on the night of my own engagement party to your grandfather, oh, too many years ago to count. We were on the floor, you see, looking for it, but his mother did not think that was a suitable...position for a young lady, so I had to leave him to it and step outside to fix my dress. But, do you know, I never found it again. It was such a pretty set, too. I do like emeralds.â
She pauses, hums a little, and Hannah looks anywhere but at Neville. âAnyway. The spellotape is in the flower pot. Neville, you might sort that out whilst you step outside with me, Hannah. I think your dress needs fixing...â