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Im gonna have like. A really bad day tomorrow. I've accepted that. But every part of me still wants to run. And i have to be like hey thanks for trying to protect us and all but we don't do that anymore. Yeah we actually face our problems and get through them. Its better. But still I'm going to a funeral. I'm seeing my brother for the first time in a while. Im meeting my brothers fiancee for the first time. I'm seeing someone i don't want to see and keeping my fucking mouth shut about it. I'm gonna probably learn some stuff i don't really want to know but need to. It's just a lot and it's gonna be 30Β° out tomorrow and I'm just gonna be a wreck and i don't have any fucking idea what to do about it other than stay hydrated. I'm just gonna have to fucking let the wave take me man. Fuck i wish i could get drunk as fuck at this wake
