#a different thing

Me when my ship is going to have a baby:

“Babe, come on. Don’t do this to me.”

JoJo shuddered at the girl’s voice. Once upon a time, when things were better, when he was an ignorant teenager, that voice would have put him on cloud nine. Now, things were different. He’d come to his senses and realized just how wrong his situation was.

“No.” He said and Marissa’s face fell.

“Excuse me?”

“No,” JoJo said with more force. “No, Marissa. I’m done. I can’t do this anymore. I won’t be your toy solider any longer.”

There was panic in Marissa's voice as she said, “Baby, what are you saying?”

JoJo shook his head.

“Don’t call me that.”

“Jo, honey, I need you here.”

“No!” He yelled. “I have worked so hard for you, Mar. I have slaved away trying to get you to love me. It’s been years! Literal years and I am sick of this- this emotional neglect you have put me through. This is about me, not you! Can’t you realize that, for once in your life?”

Marissa didn’t even try hiding the shock on her face. “What do you mean, babe, Jo, let’s talk this out. We can work through this-”

“Stop. Enough.”

Marissa flinched like he’d punched her.

“Don’t call me ‘babe.’ Not anymore. Not unless you mean it. Do you mean it?” JoJo spat his challenge at her. “If you do, I’ll stay.”

“Jo-”

“No, say it. Say it right now.”

Marissa was silent.

“Say it!” JoJo screamed at her. “Say it!” Tears fell from his face, unbidden. “Tell me you mean it, Mar! Tell me you love me.”

After a long pause, she started crying too and she shook her head softly. “I can’t.” Her voice cracked on the second word and JoJo felt his heart break with it.

“That’s what I thought.” He swung his knapsack over his shoulder. “This has been coming for a while, Mar. We both knew it.”

He turned and walked away from her, not bothering to look back.

“Where will you go?” She called. Her voice was thick with tears. He paused in front of the regal doors.

“I don’t know. Around I guess.”

“Let me help you. Let me give you food or a tent or-”

“I don’t want your help. This is me saying goodbye, Mar. Just let me go.”

Wouldn't you want to know... I said I, don't really need to see Please tell me, am I happy

Are you coming? When I really want to go Do you really want to know me Or do you want to know yourself Don't tell me I belong I'm not saying anything

Never gonna go home Don't tell me I'm afraid of you I don't care, I've got where I want Because I see you, don't tell me I'm insane It's not as if I try hard, it's not as if I really need it

But I want to seem all right I was happy as a child Now I know why: They told me not to cry. Do you really know why? Do you really know why? Am I really glowing? Am I really dying?