#90sdamonalbarn

90s!Damon. a soft sort of angsty drabble, mostly fluff, you give Damon a bath, mentions of; smoking, nude and drug addiction . reader gender’s not mentioned but it is afab intented. i so totally want to take care of him can you tell?

Me, who lost my hands in Jerez and my eyes in Rome

I grew up, and I learned shamelessness somewhere around Barcelona.

it started out as a small gig, you would’ve never thought to play such an important part for the crew, photography has always been a dream career for you, so in a way, it totally was a dream come true, Blur was also your dream band to work for.

and as inevitable as it were, you also would’ve never thought to be irrevocably and completely infatuated by the lead singer, Damon.

night after night, you would work tirelessly to get the perfect angles, the correct lighting in an attempt to capture the band’s perfect moments, but you also wished to capture all of him in his glory, you knew, that your heart was in it for him, he had captured you like a once free dove and held you captive in the troubled cage that was his heart.

I lost my tongue in Paris, my time in LA

My heels in Milan, my smile in the UK.

you never wanted this to happen, everyone in the world right now found him charming and beautiful, you were no exception to this, everyday you got to see the rawness of his soul, seeing him get up early to greet the world with his rebel but kind heart, making jokes at his band mates and involving in childish shenanigans.

giving his magic to different lovers, and you had to pretend that you were okay with this, but just the thought of it made your stomach twist and turn, to the point of sickness, just by thinking of him on someone else’s bed but yours.

he would often swing by your room, with the excuse of wanting to see himself through your lenses, hoping that this would also mean that he wanted to know how he looked like through your eyes.

all red eyed and post concert adrenaline, with heat radiating from his body, he sat by the end of your bed as you shuffled through the now printed photographs, and he would laugh and take them from you as he smiled to himself remembering those moments that were now forever immortalized by you.

this one night, you finished your shift and got offered to hang out with them for a post concert rendezvous, but since it was one of the many nights pulling an all nighter to finish storing the pictures, you opted to stay in for the night, earning a sad pout from Damon, he could notice the tiredness in your eyes, so he didn’t insist.

later on the deepness of the night, you sat by the window smoking a cigarette with soft tunes playing on the background, having a self care moment and taking everything in, a soft knock was heard on your door, with a furrowed brow you stared at the door and stood up, cigarette left on ashtray, and putting on an oversized shirt over your half naked body.

you opened the door and the picture of a tender and sentimental Damon stood tall before you, eyes glassy and shuddering breath, almost as if he was catching up from running from the pub to your hotel room.

both of your bewildered eyes traced each other, can i please come in? his raw voice uttered, you nodded softly and made space for him, he sat on your bed as you stood in front of him asking if he was okay.

so this person i’m seeing, -he started, i ended things with her. you knew who he was talking about, justine and him was the only thing the media could talk about, your typical it couple, on the flip side, you were excelent at polite smiles and seeing past your guilty feelings of jealousy, not wishing ill on them but just being fueled by Damon’s happiness, them breaking up wasn’t a surprise for you, being this deep in the band allowed you to witness the couple’s raw and cruel moments, you just, weren’t expecting a sudden end to them.

-i’m sorry- you offered sincerely, as you traced your eyes over him and noticed his vice induced bruises on the inside of his arm, feeling a painful pull in your heart, he stared at the nothingness past your figure and slowly broke into tears as he held his face between his hands, folding over his legs as sobs were let out of his mouth,

it’s just, so much, a-and i’m- god i’m sorry to come to you like this it’s-it’s just, i need to feel safe, i need my safety net -he said in between broken words and shaking breaths, taking you by surprise, sure you had grown pretty close these past couple of months but you never thought he thinks of you as a safety net.

rubbing his back you walked closer to him until you stood facing him, he lifted his now red and puffy angelic face and embraced you with need, letting out soft cries.

damon…-you started,- would you let me run you a bath? -you said as you couldn’t think of another way to make him feel better about tonight’s situation.

he took a breath and uttered a soft yes, you quickly stood up and walked over your hotel bathroom, turning the faucet on and pouring essential oils, hoping you could soothe him and his ache, once the bath was filled up, you walked over him and held his hand as you guided him to the healing waters, him following obediently, undressing in front of you, you stared to the side, giving him a sense of privacy in this intimate moment, he wasn’t a shameful person but his bareness made you feel like it was a religious experience, he stepped into the bath with a sigh, feeling relaxation overtake him, you poured shampoo over his beautiful golden hair as you massaged his scalp, hoping to pour all your love and tenderness into every stroke, purposely pouring all your attention to him, as you made him feel loved and taken care of, he softly stroked your forearm as you cleaned him with a sponge, cleaning up all his worries and pains.

once you finished, you carefully dried him up with a towel, lended him some of your baggiest clothes, smelling like you, he carefully stepped into your bed and you caressed his head as he gave into sleep, hoping for a softer day tomorrow.

But my heart has never been mine, I always give it away,

Take a piece of me, keep it for when i’m gone,