#2kim

“Junseo.” Minju tugs your shoulder. “Class is over.”

You wake up from your endless thought of marrying your best friend and see everyone packing their belongings and heading out for lunch.

“Junseo, what do you want to eat?”

“Tteokbokki?”

“Great idea!” Minju comes over with a big hug. “Let’s go!”

You and Minju walk side by side to the restaurant that has the best tteokbokki around. It's world-famous for it. Everyone on campus would walk the fifteen minutes just to get there to eat their food.

“Junseo, have you done the homework?”

“Minju… are you going to copy it again?”

“No!... yes…”

“Ugh Fine! But next time you really have to do it yourself next time.”

“Okay okay okay!” Minju stops you and raises her right hand and puts her left on her chest. “I will promise you that I’ll do my homework.”

“Good…and?”

“And I’ll let you copy it!”

You burst into laughter. “That won’t be necessary. I’m a good student and you know it. You just need to learn how to do homework.”

She turns you around and pushes you to the restaurant. “I know. Come one let’s eat. I’m starving.”

You both sit down at the restaurant and order a serving of the sweet and spicy tteokbokki. As soon as the food arrives. “jalmeokketssumnida.” You both say with your hands closed, ready to eat.

But before Minju can dig in, she receives a phone call.

“Mom?.....Uh uh?.....Chaewon?.....Is she…..? Do I need to…..”

Ah-, Chaewon. Minju’s twin sister. Not identical but fraternal. You were close with her. But Minju was more outgoing and more expressive but Chaewon is different. She has been quiet and reserved. Not really talking and mostly kept to herself. You would have been close to her if she was in your classes. But since Minju was with you. She was the one you became friends with. But it isn’t like you ignored her. You tried to be friendly with her.

But when she was a child she got a severe case of lymphoma.

Chaewon had to drop out of school when she was younger due to all the treatment and when she came back she was even more insecure about herself with the condition and all. When Chaewon sees your and Minju together, you try to invite her in. Sometimes she joins and sometimes she just goes back to her room to be quiet.

You would want to help her but with all the quietness you just leave her. As a kid, you didn’t know what cancer is and don’t know what Minju’s family is really going thru.

“Junseo, I have to go. Chaewon isn’t doing too well.”

“Do you want me to go with you?”

“Only if you want to. I mean Chaewon would be happy to see you.”

Minju and you quickly pay for the food which you have only taken a bit of. You were able to pack up the food despite the rush. Maybe Chaewon would like some.

You rush your way to the hospital in your car and quickly arrive. Minju leads you to Chaewon’s room and once you get there you see Chaewon lying on the bed looking terrible and her parents are dismayed with their daughter once again in hospital.

“Mom! Dad! Is Chaewon okay?”

Minju’s mom looks at Minju and runs to her and hugs her. “She is fine. The doctor said she can be discharged soon. They just need to take a look at her for a while.”

You look at both of Chaewon and Minju’s parents and bow to them. “Mr. and Mrs. Kim. Good Afternoon."

"Ah- Junseo. It’s nice to see you here. Have you had lunch yet?”

“Not yet sir. We were just able to eat when Minju received the call.”

“Yes, dad. We have some tteokbokki. Chaewon can have some.”

Chaewon turns at you still tired. “Really? I’ll like to have some.”

Soon, a table was set up with you, Minju, and Chaewon enjoying the tteokbokki together.

You look at Chaewon, you see her in her medical gown and with the hospital leads hooked up at her. “So, Chaewon you doing good?”

“Yeah. I just collapsed at home. I was rushed here. Good thing it isn't as bad as we feared but it’s still getting worse.”

“Chaewon! Don’t be soo gloomy. Junseo and I are here to cheer you up! Isn’t the tteokbokki helping?”

“Yes, Minju. It is. But it is hard to think that I might not live as long as you.”

“Don’t say that Chaewon! You’ll live a long and healthy life! We’re all here for you. We are waiting for your recovery. I mean didn’t I promise you that we will all get the Philippines together. Imagine the white beaches and drinking on some coconuts.” You scold her.

“Yeah, I guess you’re right. As soon as I get out of here. Let’s organize that trip.”

You and Minju just nod at her with the idea. You don’t know if that idea was supposed to cheer her up or that is actually going to happen but whatever is in your thoughts, it isn’t going to happen. When Chaewon goes back to a critical state in the middle of the night. Doctors and nurses rush to her aid as soon as the alarm bell goes off.

Soon enough, she stabilizes but is dying. The doctor sadly reports to you and the family that Chaewon won’t be here for long. This breaks the heart of everyone in the room. Their parents start sobbing and Minju comes to you for support. The room’s atmosphere becomes heavy. The tension is high. The inevitable is coming.

In the middle of the night with everyone in the room is asleep. You sit there watching over Chaewon, praying or hoping for any miracle that she will live.

“Junseo? Junseo?” Chaewon’s weakening voice calls you.

You stand up and move to Chaewon’s beside. She holds your hand and you put yours together.

“Yes?”

Her weak voice tries to desperately says anything. “Junseo, I might not have long but… but…I…I…like you.”

“Sorry?”

“I like you, Junseo. Ever since we were younger. I liked you. But once you chose Minju over me. I cannot take it anymore.”

“Chaewon, don’t say that. I’m still your friend.”

“Friend? Just a friend. I guess.”

“Chaewon…I’m sorry. I cannot do anything more.”

“Don’t worry. I don’t mind. I didn’t expect you to like me back.”

“I’m still here for you. I’m not going to leave you. Even as a friend.”

“Thank you, Junseo. I don’t know what my life would be…without…you….”

Chaewon drifts back to sleep. You go back to your seat and stay with Chaewon and think about what she said.

She likes me?

Why haven’t I noticed?

~~

The next morning, Chaewon enjoys her breakfast despite her weakened state.

“Mom. Dad. We have to go back to class.”

“Okay, honey. We’ll call you if you have any updates.”

Minju turns to Chaewon. “Ya— Don’t die when I’m gone. I’m going to return then we can have more tteokbokki.”

“Sound great to me.”

It is your turn to speak. But instead, you just come over and kiss Chaewon on the forehead and say. “I’ll miss you.”

Chaewon smiles at you as you and Minju exit the room. While on the elevator going down, Minju corners you.

“Do you like Chaewon?!”

“Uhhhhh, what do you mean?”

“Do you have a crush on her?” She grins in front of your face.

“No.”

“Then what’s with the kiss.”

“I don’t want any regrets. She hasn’t been with a guy and I just want to make sure she can feel love.”

Minju backs off from you. “It isn’t her. I’m worried about it. It’s going to be hard for you to date a dying girl. You’re going to feel devastated when she passes. I just don’t want you to feel destroyed when she does go away.”

“I know what I’m doing Minju.”

You don’t. You love Minju. Then Chaewon likes you. Your feelings get conflicted. But you have to set it aside. It is your math lecture coming up and you go back to listening but you are more alert this time. You have been this awake for so long despite barely sleeping last night.

Suddenly, Minju's phone rings again.

“Yes? Mom, Is Chaewo-…..?” Suddenly, you can see Minju start to tear up. Her eyes start to water and she leaves the lecture hall.

You follow her with notebook, pen, her bag, and your own belongings, following Minju hastily. As you and Minju leave, you both apologize to the professor. He just looks at you confused, not knowing what happened but can guess what Minju is feeling.

As you exit, you see Minju sitting on the floor, crying her heart out. Her hands are on her face, coving what was once a happy girl and now turned into someone who lost her second half. All you can do is come and comfort her, hugging her as tight as you can. You cannot help yourself but also cry. Passers-by just stared as they walk past and see a girl hugged by her best friend.

You reach the hospital as fast as you can, faster than before. Minju doesn’t want to wait any longer. You go in via valet and rush to her room. And as feared for the worst. Chaewon is there laying, dead. Passed away. Deceased. How else can you describe it? Minju runs towards her bedside and kneels and holds Chaewon’s dead hand.

“Chaewon! Chaewon! Chaewon!!!!!” She buries her head on her side. Nothing can be done for her. All Minju can do is grive.

A/N Had to research what happens in a Korean funeral I added some of my own experiences. So it isn’t 100% accurate but if you want to know you can research it yourself.

The funeral goes on as expected. Her few friends and family arrive and pay their respects to her. With how close you are with the family you stayed there for the entire ordeal. When you first came in, you sit down in shock eating Chaewon’s favorite kimchi while Minju sits beside you crying on your shoulder. You can feel the tears dripping down on your black suit.

On the third day, you join the procession. Chaewon’s dad asks you if you want to join in carrying the coffin. It was what Chaewon asked. You do. Your job was to hold the picture of her while the coffin will follow you and the rest will walk behind. It is loaded up and sent to the cemetery.

The pastor does his final sermon for the funeral. But before Chaweon gets lowered. Mr. and Mrs. Kim, you and Minju go up to her coffin to send out your final wishes.

As you approach it, “I’m sorry Chaewon. I cannot love you the way you loved me.” You whisper.

Minju looks at you. “Huh? I didn’t get the entire what you said. You love Chaewon?”

“Uhh. I explain later.”

You and the family step back for the final time as Chaewon gets lowered to the ground.

The day has ended. Minju and her family pack up in the car and leave the cemetery. You and your family just get n the car. You stare at Chaewon’s grave as your leave, wishing for you to have the same courage as she did.

~~

One year later

~~

“Junseo!” Minju shouts your name. Her hand blocked the sun from her eyes. “Junseo. It is over here!”

You quickly follow Minju’s voice to Chaewon’s grave. Minju bows for her sister and places some flowers for her. You bow as well.

“Junseo. You said that you’ll explain it to me.” Minju looks at you with her hands on her jacket while the wind blows through.

“Explain what?”

“I never really asked you. Did you love my sister?”

“Ah— Minju.”

“Don’t lie to me. I’ll believe what you’ll say to me. I just want some closure.”

“Minju. I’m not going to lie to you. Chaewon…Chaewon….yeah. I loved Chaewon.”

“What do you love about her?”

“Ummm…. well she is pretty for one. She is kind. Caring. When I spend time with her, my mood changes. Like….I….feel good. Do you get what I mean?”

“Oh— Yeah. I see. I see. At least she had someone she loved. Does she know that?"

“What?” Minju catches your attention once more.

“Does she know you love her?”

“No. No, she doesn’t. All she thinks of me as a friend.”

“Really?! I know Chaewon would have fallen for you. But it wouldn’t have wanted you to date her.”

“Why?”

“Didn’t I tell you before? Your heart is just going to be broken.”

“Does that matter? If I love her. I love her. Even if I can’t receive that love from her.”

“I see….Want to get some tteokbokki? My treat!” Minju looks at you with excitement.

“Mhm.”

She locks her arms with yours. As you push her as she tries to hug you closer. Minju looks at you and smiles. You look back and realize how beautiful and perfect she is.