#1989-2012

Or maybe no matter how hard I try I will never be able to get over the things you said, the things that we did, or the things that you promised.

And maybe it's just the fact that I need you.

Maybe -- this stupid fucking goddamned word.

I was too scared to put my foot down because I was afraid I'd lose you.

Too weak to say no to the things we shouldn't have done.

And now came the point where we had to part, not because we disagreed to agree, but because fate wanted us to.

Cruel and unfair cannot even begin to describe how I feel about life.

And every time I wake up I'd fake a smile and proceed with my day, wear my dorky clothes which you hated the most.

And every fucking day would be hell because no matter how hard I try I will never forget how you influenced me on a lot of things.

A couple of years from now I'll start to feel okay again, and I know I'll slowly be able to get back on my feet.

But I know I'll never be okay of the fact that I lost you.

We lost you.

Forever, you said.

You'll always be in my thoughts and in my heart.

I love you. I love you very very very much, you know how much I value those words.

They better take good care of you up there.

Till we meet again, say hi to my grandfather and grandmother for me.