happy birthday to me! I've becometh an adult.
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happy birthday to me! I've becometh an adult.

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Me and my sister doing shots for my 18th
i recently(ish) turned 18 and it was scary.
iβm kind of over it now, because itβs done, thereβs nothing you can do to prevent the passage of time.
instead of being upset about it, iβve been trying to compensate for the things that made me scared in the first place.
i never really got a chance to be 12 or 13. i honestly barely remember those years. it wasnβt a βtime where i was forced to grow up earlyβ or any of that, but it was a time where i had to deal with a lot more than i would have liked to deal with. a time when i was suddenly faced with the reality of my life- barriers iβll have to continuously face, challenges iβd revisit again and again. 11, 12 and 13 was kind of just the time when mental illness started kicking me in the ass, and it was all too unfamiliar back then. i didnβt understand it.
because i donβt remember it all, iβve been trying to find as many photos, videos, any sort of memorabilia that i can thatβs saved on old devices or whatnot. i never really bothered to investigate it all because i was too focused on moving forward and putting things in the past, and it still didnβt feel like that βpastβ was too far away. i still felt like i was partially the same person. now that iβm a little bit older, i feel like an entirely different person from 13-year-old me. instead of regretting her, i pity her. i feel like i owe her whatever i can give. keeping her memory alive as best as i can is one of those things. i donβt want to bury the pictures, iβll keep them in a personal brain-locket. it really is strange though- looking at recorded memories that you know are your own, but you canβt remember making them, and canβt remember what it was like.
iβm not sure if this moment in my life is really all that deep or difficult, itβs kind of just my usual shitty challenge, but it feels like a discovery time. iβve been trying to heal from my past- put back what was taken from me, and iβve also been trying to figure out who i am now.
- sauro
HELLO LYDIBIDIBIDIS !!!!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY U ANGEL!!!!!!!!! ππππππππ im so happy we got to know each other more ur so precious nd funny!!!! im here always rooting for u !!!!!! the BEST bbh-l out there, funniest, most caring πππππ I HOPE U HAVE THE MOST AMAZING DAY EVER W UR FAM FRIENDS AND UR LIL ANGELS AT HOME (yes also nene) LOVE U LYDDIE CAN U BELIEVE EXO IS COMING BACK THIS MONTH JUST FOR U?? LEGENDS ONLY uwu ur power !!!!
LYDIBIDIBIDIS HSBSJWGEJSJD THANK U FRAN ππππππππππur too nice pwease these kind words ... im not deserving !!! I LOVE U :3 !!!!!
this month but its fine cos exo got ur back... they really said lydia deserves the best birth month... so they giving u a whole album !!!! I LOVE U SWEETHEART!!! πππππππππ³
2nd part ... THANK U AGAIN MY LOVE !!! β€οΈβ€οΈβ€οΈ PLEASE SHSVSJEH THEY REALLY DID WOW ... I LOVE U SO MUCH !! πππβ€οΈππππβ€οΈπππβ€οΈπππ

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HELLO... MY ANGEL, MY ******* its ur birthday!!!! honestly im so so sO glad i got to know u. ur honestly so sweet to me (& everyone who talks to u!!!) i would die for u!!! i wish we talked a whole lot more but timezones hate us ig but somehow we've still managed to keep the convo going for like??? almost a year??? i wish today is/has been a great day for u i hope u eat some good food, have a great time w ur friends/family & treat urself to all the great things u want!! bbh should have had bolo
im just gonna answer both parts HEBSHEGEHSJSJJ OMG THANK U KIM MY BABY π«β€οΈππππππππ ALSO THE *******...... im zzzzz BGJDHEUDJ
hi nd happy bday angel !!!! πππππππππππππππππππ i hope u can have a beautiful day ilu
HELLO THANK U !!!! β¨ππππ ur the angel here ! ilu2 :( πβ€οΈβ€οΈπ
i hope you have the bestest 18th birthday ever, you deserve the bestest!! iβm so sad tho we couldβve been bday twins π£π
omg thank u so much!!! πππππ BDAY TWINS?!? WHENS UR BDAY DID I MISS IT OMG HAPPY LATE BDAY π«π« !!!