#11052019

David: *took out his sketchbook after Matteo vanished into the bathroom and randomly filled a page with things that had accompanied him yesterday and today: two Dürum, the transgender-flag from the Instagram-posts, Matteo and him embracing in his sleeping bag, his and Matteo's hands, two mugs of coffee and so on* *only made rough sketches and plans to complete some of them later when he has time* *skims through some older stuff when Matteo comes back into the room* *smiles automatically when he sees him and cocks his head* Na? All cleaned up? *grins slightly*

Matteo: *grins* Yep, as clean as it gets... *drops himself on the bean bag next to him and then leans forward to refill his coffee* *sees his sketchbook and grins slightly* Did you have to process the traumatic experience with Linn?

David: *takes the mug from Matteo when he refills their coffees* Thanks... *laughs at Matteo's question and shakes his head* *Nah... I was just doodling a little... *pushes the sketchbook towards Matteo in case he wants to take a look* ... I have to finish it sometime when I have more time... *remembers something and pulls the sketchbook back toward him* *murmurs* Hang on... *removes the paper clips that hid the pages he thought were too private - obvious transgender elements, some pages on which he processed the humiliations at his old school and countless sketches of Matteo before they met and some other big and small things connected to him* *puts the book back on the armrest between them and looks at Matteo invitingly* Well, If you'd like...

Matteo: *laughs slightly* With you it's never just doodling... *Is just about to reach for the book when David pulls it back toward himself* *thinks that David remembered something he isn't supposed to see and waits for him to tear out or glue together pages* *is all the more surprised when the opposite happens and looks at him with wide eyes* Of course I'd like to... *reluctantly takes the book into his hands* Are you sure? *sees David nod and then carefully skims through the book* *reaches the pages he wasn't allowed to look at a few weeks ago* *swallows when he sees the tougher sketches* *turns the page and sees his own face, sometimes bigger, sometimes smaller, sometimes only his eyes, sometimes in profile* *two full double-pages only of him* *looks at him dumbfounded* When... when did you make these?

David: *watches as Matteo skims the book and only looks at the pages a couple of times to see what Matteo is looking at* *at Matteo's question he leans a little further toward him to see which sketches he is looking at* *grins and blushes slightly* Hmmm... if I told you it was after our first conversation, would you consider me a freak? *has actually recorded the situation or the feelings or Matteo himself after every meeting with him... and during the time they didn't have any contact he drew him again and again whenever he thought about him*

Matteo: *shakes his head* *looks back at the drawings and then back at David again* No... I'm just... flabbergasted... for only seeing me once you captured me pretty well... *clears his throat* After our first conversation I only tried to find you on Insta... *looks back towards the page* *slowly skims forward*

David: *grins slightly* Your face etched itself directly into my brain... *in his thoughts adds "and into my heart", but doesn't say it because it sounds too cheesy and because it's more true for their second meeting than their first conversation* *laughs quietly when he mentions Instagram and thinks* I don't even remember when we followed each other there... *leans forward when Matteo keeps turning pages, but finds it pretty uncomfortable having to twist like that - especially as the armchair is wide enough for both of them to fit* *shuffles to the side of the armchair, almost to the armrest, and asks* Do you maybe want to come up here? Then I can see better and don't have to twist like that... *can feel a little that he has been wearing his binder for too long but is quite relaxed at the moment and so it isn't too much of a strain, yet* *wouldn't mind being a little closer to Matteo, anyways* *glances back at the book and notices that they almost reached the "sandwich-recipe in pictures"*

Matteo: *looks at him slightly amused but also a little touched* Awwww *shrugs his shoulders* I don't either... *does remember it exactly but doesn't want to expose himself as someone who remembers stuff like that* *looks up at him when David offers the space next to him* *grins and naturally joins him there immediately* *would love to put an arm around him but leaves it for now because otherwise he wouldn't be able to turn the pages anymore* *turns the page and sees the sandwich-recipe and has to laugh out loud* This is genius! *looks at him lovingly* The drawings are all really awesome…

David: *smiles satisfied when Matteo sits down next to him, hesitates briefly but then puts an arm around him and leans against him to look into the book with him* *grins when he hears Matteo’s laugh and shrugs* At least this way we can never forget what was on them... just in case we want to prepare another feast like that* *laughs but then gets more serious again and smiles at Matteo's compliment* *hears a phone buzz and tries to fumble his phone out of his pocket* *looks at Matteo questioningly while doing so* Yours or mine? *eventually manages to get his phone out and glances at it* *shakes his head* Yours! *moves slightly away so that Matteo has enough space to grab his phone but lets his arm remain on the armrest*

Matteo: *smiles and wipes imaginary pearls of sweat off his forehead* Thank God! *also notices the vibrating and is immediately annoyed that someone is disturbing them* *gets up to take his phone out of his pocket* *sees that it's his mother and immediately feels bad* Sorry, my mum... *walks a few steps away and picks up* Hi Mama...

David: *nods when Matteo apologizes and contemplates for a moment whether he should leave Matteo alone* *decides against it because if he didn't want him to hear the conversation he probably would have left the room* *reaches for his mug and tries to look as if he wasn’t listening but still hears everything*

Matteo’s mom: *is glad that her son answers his phone; had tried calling yesterday without success and was worried after he had disappeared so suddenly the day before that* Hey, darling... I just wanted to ask if everything's alright...

Matteo: *turns slightly away from David, more as a reflex than defense* Yes, everything all right... sorry that I left... but I had to take care of something... but everything’s good now...

Matteo’s mom: Take care of what? Did it have something to do with David? I mean it's probably none of my business... anyways: It is good that everything's all right and well now. *sounds a little insecure, as if she didn't know to what extend she is allowed to ask her son about private things*

Matteo: *closes his eyes briefly* *doesn't really want to tell his mother anything but doesn't want to offend her either* Yes... it did... but... everything's fine now and we... we'll make up for the dinner, okay?

Matteo’s mom: *sounds happy* Yes, I'd love that! With David as well? When do you have time?

Matteo: *shakes his head for himself* Maybe... I don't know... *briefly looks over to David* *I'll ask him and I'll text you, ok?

Matteo’s mom: Do that! - I'm looking forward to it! *one can hear her smile* *Bye, my boy! *waits for Matteo to say goodbye and then hangs up the phone*

David: *had sipped his coffee and waited* *only looked up once when Matteo said he would ask _him_ and wondered briefly if it was about him* *watches Matteo now, after all, but thinks that he doesn't look stressed but only a little impatient* *smiles when Matteo hangs up and turns around to face him* *tilts his head questioningly* Everything all right?

Matteo: Bye, Mama *hangs up and puts the phone back into his pocket* *nods briefly and talks while he goes back to David and sits back down next to him* Yes, that was my mom... I kinda left her hanging on Thursday and well... *shrugs one shoulder* She invited us over for dinner... but I didn't agree on anything... I can go by myself...

David: *briefly thinks about what could have happened on Thursday and realizes that it was probably because Laura had told him that he hadn't come home* *feels bad for a moment but doesn't get the chance to apologize again because Matteo continues talking* *looks at him skeptically while he talks and shakes his head slightly* Um, what? She invited _us_? *for one, didn't know that Matteo came out to his mother and didn’t know that he even told her about him, either* *smiles insecurely and stammers slightly* I didn't know that you... well I thought you weren't out to her... and... she knows about me?

Matteo: *nods slowly when he asks /who/ she invited* Yes... *listens to him and instantly gets a little embarrassed* Oh... umm... yes... after I called you, when I wanted to pick you up... after that phone call I texted her... well I came out and she knows your name but not much more than that... *looks at him and puts his arm around him* And you really don't have to come if you don't want to...

David: *smiles lovingly and a little proudly because he thinks it's really brave of Matteo and because it shows him once again how certain Matteo had been the entire time that he wants to be with him - if he even told his mother about him* *leans on him when he puts his arm around him and reaches for his hand* *quietly says* This was really brave! *actually thinks any kind of coming-out is really brave* *grins when he hears his next words and looks up at him provokingly* And if I want to? Would you take me with you? *would actually like to meet Matteo’s mother*

Matteo: *shrugs when he says that it was brave* Over text? I just wanted her to know... *grins at him when he says that he wants to come along* Of course I would take you with me... but I'd warn you that you can't choose your family... *hesitates briefly and gets serious again* My mother takes antidepressants... I think she's doing better now... but... it wasn't always easy with her.... and I'm used to not really knowing in what mood she's in... just so you know...

David: *thinks the way of the coming-out doesn't matter - if it's over text or in person - it's a really big step* *shrugs when he hears his warning and grinningly sighs* You don't have to tell ME about it... *thinks that one of these days they're probably going to talk about his family, too, but for now he's only curious about Matteo’s mother* *gets serious again when Matteo does and listens to him* *presses his lips together briefly and at first doesn't really know what he should say or what he's allowed to ask* *brushes his thumb over the back of Matteo's hand and eventually says* If you want to tell me more about it... about your mother or your parents you can do that anytime... doesn't have to be now... but maybe sometime... *looks up at him and gives him a brief, tender kiss on his mouth* *murmurs* I'm here, okay?

Matteo: *nods slowly* *smiles at the kiss* Okay... maybe some time... later... after you've met her... *kisses him again and automatically slides closer to him*

David: *smiles at Matteo's words and nods* Okay... *gets another kiss and feels how Matteo slides closer to him* *softly grabs his neck so that Matteo won’t release the kiss and deepens it* *runs a hand through his hair, which is still damp from the shower and then back over his neck and his cheek* *a feeling of happiness rushes through him when he thinks about the fact that he can kiss Matteo whenever he wants now*

Matteo: *makes out with David on his armchair a little longer until his stomach rumbles once again* *laughs and apologizes* *they decide to get some food and go to the kitchen to make some sandwiches, which they take back to Matteo's room* *they then move from the armchair to the bed* *at some point, Matteo puts on some quiet music and they lie there and talk* *Matteo tells him a little more about his friends, who is or was dating whom or who's crushing on whom, what they are like* *David talks a little about Laura and his godmother* *at some point in the evening they order pizza and Matteo manages to get it and be back in his room without being held up by one of his flatmates* *after eating the pizza they are more quiet and make out more than talk*

David: *really enjoyed the entire day with Matteo and felt incredibly comfortable* *found it interesting to learn more about Matteo's friends and thus more about Matteo and thinks that being with him like that has a completely different meaning now as finally nothing is standing between them anymore* *is lying on the bed with Matteo after eating the pizza - by now both of them only in their T-shirts, as sweaters and hoodies were getting too warm - and enjoys the closeness to him and that they don't need many words right now* *runs his fingers over Matteo’s neck while they kiss and can't really resist the urge to be even closer to him* *therefore deepens the kiss and moves closer to Matteo* *pushes his leg between Matteo's legs and wraps his arm around his back* *moves his arm softly up and down his back*

Matteo: *feels a pleasant shudder when David pulls him closer* *has his hand in David's hair and pushes himself even closer to David* *kisses him and notices how his entire body reacts to David* *his /entire/ body* *panics all of a sudden as he doesn't know what he should do and might do something wrong* *pulls away from David and exhales deeply* Sorry... I... *is still slightly out of breath and has to collect himself a little* Well, I... *swallows hard and then looks at him* I have never...

David: *because of the closeness to Matteo he can feel that all this making out doesn't leave Matteo unaffected either and notices that he feels the same way* *doesn't have any idea where this might lead to but is too aroused to think about this now* *lets everything happen and loses himself in this feeling and is therefore slightly confused and a little breathless when Matteo suddenly pulls away* *asks himself briefly if he did something wrong and it takes some time for Matteo's words to get through to him* *swallows and then smiles slightly when he understands what Matteo is trying to tell him* *puts a hand on his cheek and looks back at him* Me neither... *gnaws at his bottom lip and tries to sort his thoughts* *asks quietly* So you never, ever? Neither with boys nor girls? *thinks that the question sounds somewhat stupid and blushes slightly* *assumed that Matteo had slept with Sara but likes the thought that apparently that wasn't the case and that it will be the first time for both of them*

Matteo: *immediately feels stupid and thinks that he shouldn't have told him and should have just kept going* *but then he feels David's hand on his cheek and relaxes a little* *closes his eyes briefly when he says he hasn’t either and is somehow extremely relieved* *opens his eyes at his question* *can assume that David is talking about Sara and shakes his head* No... boys never offered themselves... and with girls... I didn't want to... *bites lightly on his bottom lip* So... well... it didn't come out of nowhere that she was able to put two and two together so quickly, I guess...

David: *laughs at Matteo's words and feels his heart do a little jump* *knows that it probably shouldn't matter but it still means something to him that apparently they'll make this first experience together* *thinks that right now Matteo looks so open and slightly unsure but so beautiful that he just has to lean forward to kiss him again* *searches for words and eventually says quietly* So far, that was out of question... there wasn't anybody I trusted enough that it could have even come close to that... *moves closer to him again, gets a little nervous and feels his heart jump to his throat when he whispers* But with you, I could imagine it...

Matteo: *immediately closes his eyes when David kisses him* *looks at him again when he talks and feels even the last bit of tension leave his body* *nods slightly at his words and feels his heart beat faster* I feel the same... *closes the distance between them and kisses him again* *at first softly and tenderly but then he deepens the kiss and pulls him a little closer* *is about to carefully push his hand under David's T-shirt when there is a knock on his door* *can’t even react before the door opens and Hans is standing in his room* Hello, my butterfly, Linn said... Oh! Hello! *Matteo sat up to at least attempt to shield David a little* Hans, out!

David: *almost beams when Matteo says that he feels the same, but then gets kissed and pulled closer by him* *deepens the kiss together with Matteo and quickly realizes that they pick up right where they left off earlier* *flinches when there is a knock on the door and only seconds later Hans is standing in the room* *blushes and gets flustered and is relieved when Matteo sits up to shield him a little even though he immediately misses being close to Matteo* *hears Hans laugh at Matteo's request: "Oh, you sweethearts, I didn't want to interrupt... let me know if you need anything! Keep going! Have fun"!* *blushes even more at Hans' words but actually hears the door close and then it's quiet* *lays there petrified and shocked for a moment but then he pulls Matteo back down and half on top of him* *grins slightly* You heard him… keep going... *searches for his lips again and deepens the kiss* *eventually puts a hand under Matteo's shirt and softly strokes it up and down his back* *loves how soft his skin is there and realizes that he wants to feel more of that* *at some point hears distant voices coming from the living room - Mia and Hans: "Why can't you fold your laundry in your room for a change!!? Give them some privacy!" - "But here I'm closer to the action... in case they need anything..."* *stops listening to the discussion but still feels a little under observation* *is glad when it soon gets silent again in the living room but can't quite turn off the thought that somebody is sitting there, listening to every noise coming from Matteo's room* *hears Hans laughing loudly all of a sudden and stops the kiss a little* *murmurs* We could also go to my place...

Matteo: *laughs a little when David pulls him back toward him* *manages to suppress the interruption and continues* *can also hear the voices coming from the living room and thinks that somehow this isn’t great* *sighs when he hears Hans’ laugh and pulls David back* *is really glad about his suggestion* Yes, please… *gives him another short kiss and slowly pulls away* Sorry... I never thought they'd all stay home on a Saturday night... *gets up slowly together with David* *both of them get dressed again and Matteo stops at the door* Okay... the plan is get through the living room quickly, grab jackets, bag and shoes and then we're out of here... don't give Hans any chance *grins a little*

David: *laughs quietly at Matteo's answer and grumbles a little when he slowly pulls away after the short kiss* *doesn't want to let him go at all* *shrugs at Matteo's apology, smiles and murmurs* No problem... you couldn't have known... *gets up with a sigh and puts his sweater back on* *then says* Maybe my sister will be at home, but she usually spends her evenings in her room and probably won't disturb... *at least he hopes so* *would really like to continue what they started without any interruptions* *grins at Matteo's words once they're at the door and nods* Okay - go in and win... or rather: go in and flee! *gets ready and follows Matteo when he opens the door* *has to grin when he sees Hans sitting in the living room in front of the TV with a pile of laundry and doesn't react to his comment: "Oh, do you need anything?! Are you leaving"?* *only grabs his stuff, puts on his shoes quickly and leaves the flat with Matteo* *has to laugh when the door closes behind them* Made it! *briefly pulls Matteo against him and kisses him hard but brief* And now let's hurry... I want to continue where we left off!