The day I received light.
The day I received light it felt like the end was near. People told me the world was full of magic and wonder, but the world I experienced felt grim, weathered and unsafe. To me, that world was set in stone and only a miracle could’ve broken through my monolithic view. I had searched long and large for that miracle with the knowledge it was too good to be true. I didn’t find it. So, I stopped looking. I went on with my life knowing the quest of finding something better was hopeless, insane, but still, a part of me held on to the insane. I was hanging on by a thread, holding on to the fantasy that people had described to me so many times. Feeling better, feeling happy.
Thank god, I held on.
One day as my unsuspecting, utterly pessimistic and depressed self stood there hopeless like any other day, something magic happened. I didn’t comprehend at first, but when my eyes fell on five lights and my ears heard the bells ring, I knew I was witnessing something different. I was witnessing my miracle. Like a moth to a flame, I held on to it and promised myself I would never let go.
10 years later, here we are. I’m still holding on to my miracle. To the ones who receive light and give light. You have given me a new breath of life. You have given me the proof that even when you stop looking and stop believing, something good, something extraordinary can come your way.
I will thank you forever for all that you did and are still doing for me. You are the lights that have brightened my dark yesterdays, todays and tomorrows. You are my saviors.
I can never repay you, but one thing is for sure, I’m a shawol forever.
