#1.01.15

It's a sequel that tells the prequel to my favorite movie. And it got me thinking. What do we value in life? What do we consider to be our fortune?

It's easy to get caught up in the mindset that we need to make money. I mean, yes of course, we need money in order to survive. In this world we live in at least, we "need" it. But is that really our fortune?

"Life's greatest fortunes are the ones closest to you."

As I watched, people came to mind. People in my life whom I love, very much. People who I hope will remain in my life for many years, for all of my years. But do I take the time to live for them now? To live with them now? I can't say that I've given as much time to them as I would have liked, but that doesn't mean I can't do it in the future.

Filtering.

Attempting to find the perfect words and the perfect thoughts even though it's not about that. I'm trying to tread carefully, even though this is a space for myself. We do that, sometimes, don't we? We become all too aware of the situation we're in, our surroundings. Even during times when the only factor should be our disposition.

Reaching.

Grabbing at words and thoughts that seem right. Trying to find material to use when I know exactly what it is I want to say. To convey. To share. But instead I reach for something else. We do that, sometimes. We try to cater to what others would prefer. What would be best suited for them.

Hesitating.

Stopping myself. That bit of uncertainty.

Gaaaah.