#*clings*

lisa, my darling, i've been saving this for a week because i was ~going through it~, but i want you to know how much this meant to me, and how much it helped me the night you sent it. the person who said that about me was a family member (someone i try never to tell anything because of exact comments like that...), and i was already not doing well and having a bad illness flare, so it caused me to break down a little. you have been here with me for such a long time (a decade, i think!!! 💕💕💕), and have never hesitated to listen and understand and lend me kindness, and i treasure your friendship very much. *clings* i know a lot of what you've been through and carried too, and i'm so glad you're still here and shining your light. i'm also publishing this because i want other people to take it to heart too - the attitude in certain corners right now about shaming negative thoughts or in sharing our struggles is SO damaging, repressing those experiences or not feeling safe to share with people close to us only serves to make those emotions worse. it doesn't make us...burdens (and i'm guilty of feeling this way a lot and apologizing for it)...to turn to people when we need them, and it doesn't make us any less valuable or even capable of hope and love to also feel and express our pain and darkness is difficult times.

It’s Artist’s Way reading (and media) deprivation week for me; I won’t be back until Monday! (On the plus side, I am using this time to try and unknot a bunch of writing problems, including the ones I have with AHOD. Also, there should be an AFW chapter when I get back.)

Family stuff has Happened this week (I am fine) that made me stress-sick (fever, exhaustion, thanks body)--it took @w0rdinista to remind me oh, yeah, when I get really stressed I DO get ridiculously physically ill. (Combined with reading dep! combined with a bunch of med changes! combined with an unanticipated mother in law visit! I didn’t kill anyone! This is a miracle!!)

HOWEVER I leave you on a happy note: I  finally bit the bullet and decided to try Lush’s henna (I used the Rouge; I was so sick of paying SO MUCH MONEY to get my hair colored) and IT IS THE BEST RED HAIR I HAVE EVER HAD. I LOVE IT.

Hi Maddie!! *hugs* I LOOOOOOVE HUGS :’) Thanks darling! 

BONNIE 🥺😭 this brought instant tears to my eyes, i am so so so unbelievably lucky and blessed to know you and have your constant friendship in my life. you're stuck with me!!! i love you more than words 💞