#(3x5)

He's just a baby

Dangerous curves. 3x5. Pencil, color pencil and markers on paper. 2017.

Found in a 2017 sketchbook of mine. Falling in love with so much of my older artwork. I didn’t like it in 2017. Weird. Needed to get an art post up for the week. Here it is.

Operation: C.H.A.R.A.D.E.S. (Chicanery Hiding Away 'Round Abby's Desired Eccentric Sweetheart)

3 pages (1,601 words)

“Okie-dokie Numbuh 5, here’s a tricky one!” Kuki announces. She throws her hair over her face and makes a triangle shape with the rest of her body before wiggling her body. She starts humming like she won some kind of fancy contest as she dances, all the while trying to keep that triangle shape. You’re not supposed to make noise with this kind of game, but when has Kuki ever followed the rules?

I giggle, “Alright, alright, Numbuh 5’s gotta think about this one.” This one’s real nutty—time to get real clever, Numbuh 5.

I shoot my first answer, “how about… Father trying to do yoga while having a bad hair day?”

Nope.

She bends her arms over and over again while keeping that pointed shape with her hands, like she’s putting on some kind of hat over and over again.

“Oh! The Interesting Twins… mimicking one of them crazy rainforest birds?”

She’s unfazed. Aw c’mon, that was a good one!

She changes her act, now stomping her feet wildly and making her long hair flop around like crazy. I can hear her sputter as she tries to get hair out of her mouth, but she still keeps trucking along.

No no, I got it!

“Numbuh 4 trying to tap dance after being transformed into Bigfoot by an evil witch!”

Kuki throws her head up as she hoots and hollers at my answer. Her hair stumbles away from a part of her face, revealing a snippet of her beaming smile and warm skin.

Numbuh 5, you crazy for finding her cute.

She laughs, “why would Wally ever tap dance!?! That’s so silly!” She keeps laughing about it. I really got her good.

We got our own weird way of playin’ charades. Instead of picking the right answer, we have to say the funniest one. We’re playing it in her room right now.

I laugh alongside her. “Well, if Numbuh 4’s got the gall to wear them Heelies everywhere, maybe he’d get a kick out of tap dancing.”

“Nah, he’d hate it ‘cause tap dancing is like, fancy-shmancy, and he doesn’t like that at all. He thinks being fancy is too girly for him.”

We sure do make fun of Wally a lot when we do these.

“Heheh, I get it. Numbuh 5 isn’t much of a girly type either,” I say impulsively. I mean, she knows but… she kinda knows. Doesn’t know everything. She’s still nice about it, I just… I sometimes feel like I’m doing something wrong though.

Her smile shrinks and she hops onto the edge of her bed to sit next to me. “There’s nothing wrong with that! Wally does that. He used to be a girl until he didn’t like it anymore, so now he’s a boy.”

She tends to state the obvious like that a good bit. We all know that. That fact makes me feel weird though, like I’m supposed to feel the same way… but I don’t. I don’t really get his whole deal, anyway. I don’t get how someone can just feel that way, but I ain’t gonna be a jerk about it. It doesn’t feel like my business.

I get a little nervous. “Well, i-it’s weird. I don’t act like a girl but I still feel like one. It’s really odd.” Better leave it at that. She has no idea how much of a weirdo I actually am. Probably better to keep it that way. If they gonna laugh at that stuff at school, she’ll probably laugh about it too.

“That’s okay too!” She consoles all chipper.

I really shouldn’t tell her. She a boy-crazy type.

“You, uh, you and Wally been friends for a long time, right?”

“Yep! I’ve known him since we were three! We’ve been through thickity-thick and thin and we’re still friends!”

Oh, is Numbuh 5 really gonna ask what she wants to ask? Can’t help but wanting to.

I stammer, “you and him—do you know he’s uhm, he like likes you?”

“Duhhhh, of course I know he like likes me!”

Huh. I forget that she’s smarter than she looks sometimes. When I think I know her, I really don’t. Not even Sherlock Holmes could solve this mystery. I kinda like it, though.

I chuckle and put my hands on the back of my head. “You like ‘im back?”

She frowns and turns her back away from me. “Not really.”

I hesitate, but eventually put her hand on her back. Her sweater feels nice. I like it. I can’t be a ditz. Gotta use my listening skills, and them teachers say I got a good set of that.

Kuki goes on after being quiet for a moment. “I feel like I should like him like that, but I don’t. I like a lot of boys, so why can’t I like him? Am I doing something wrong?”

There’s no way she knows what I feel. I’m crazy. I’m the only kid in the world with this problem, I gotta be! But she’s all bummed out right now. Sometimes telling a secret makes things a little better…

“C-can I tell you a secret?” I ask, trying to be brave.

She turns around, revealing her anxious face. Man, I hate seeing her like that; it makes me wanna cry!

“Yeah…”

I’m really doing this, huh? Just take a deep breath, Numbuh 5. Be brave like you always be.

“I—eheh, this is gonna sound crazy but I’ve never crushed on a boy before.”

“Really?” She remarks with way less emotion than she usually puts in. It creeps me out, but I wanna know more. I wanna keep going so I can know more about her. I’m going crazy.

“Like… I just d-don’t like boys like that—it’s so simple! It’s weird though.”

“I guess that makes sense. I could never see you liking a boy, either. I don’t know why.”

“I mean… I uh—it’s not only that. I like girls instead of boys.”

Secret’s out now. Kuki’s looking at me all funny. I fight bad guys and escape traps all the time; why am I getting so hung up over one little secret?

“Can I say something crazy too?” Kuki requests. I keep my mouth shut and nod. “Sometimes I like girls in the same way I like boys too!” She pauses, then continues, “well, if we both like girls, maybe its’ not so weird at all. If Wally can be a boy, why can’t we be weird like that too?”

I guess it’s really that simple, huh? I only do simple when I really know it’s simple. And I don’t always know when something’s simple or not. She really is smarter than she looks to be.

Now I feel funny—oh shut up, you’ve felt funny for this whole talk. I like her. I like her a lot. And if there’s nothing wrong with that but she still dumps me, maybe the heartbreak won’t feel so bad.

“Y-know K-Kuki, I always thought you were brave,” I chuckle, “sometimes you braver than ol’ Numbuh 5 here.”

Her eyes widen and she starts blushing. She starts fidgeting with her sleeves and I’m gonna scream. Numbuh 5’s a cautious girl though, and she won’t go on and on about how she’s cute, and funny, and nice, and she’s got the pretty hair, and the cute nose, and—

“GAH! I CAN’T TAKE IT!” Kuki screams. “YOU’RE SO NICE! YOU’RE NICER THAN ME IT MAKES ME—IT MAKES ME WANNA,” then she really screams. It’s brief but you can hear it echo through the halls through its sheer oomph. Thank goodness we’re in the treehouse ‘cause every adult and their momma would’ve run over to check on her if we were literally anywhere else.

Wait. We’re alone. We ain’t screaming like we saw a dead person so nobody’s gonna come over. Oh my gosh it’s just us.

Now I really start running my mouth, “okay, okay, you’re really cute, cuter than the cutest Rainbow Monkey. I feel so bad when I’m not nice to you, ‘cause I really do like you. I like you a lot. I-I like…” I stop, but the dam can’t hold back the flood. “I LIKE YOU HOW WALLY LIKES YOU!” I holler before compulsively covering my mouth up.

Kuki gets close to me. Man, don’t even get close. Don’t even look at me. I tip my hat to hide my face. I’m probably blushing like there’s no tomorrow. That girl grabs onto my hand and she lifts my hat back up. She looks just as nutty as me and she’s happy about it. And I’m happy about it too.

She’s still holding onto my hat and starts fidgeting with the brim. She’s looking away. I can just tell she wants to scream and hoot and holler like she always does but she’s not doing it. She’s nervous like me. She’s probably more nervous than me if she’s getting all quiet.

“You uhm, would you like to go on a date with me sometime?” I ask quietly.

She lunges towards me and hugs me real tight. While her face is buried in my shoulder she starts squealing and kicking her feet.

I chuckle softly, “I think I know this one: Numbuh 3 going cuckoo for Numbuh 5!”

She laughs at my joke and pulls back from me. “You’re crazy, Abby.”

“You’re crazy, Kuki—crazy with a k!”

“Well, you’re crazy with an a!”

“You’re crazier than me if you’re gonna spell crazy with an a!”

Kuki giggles and then holds my hand. “We’re both crazy.”