ventilation.

I'm not even a part of you, you're a part of me Brush me aside as three beautiful kings pushed under, crushed by the sea I'm somewhere below you wishing I was free

the flames are cold, blue. they should burn the hottest yet instead they make my center dry ice and dry eyes, and I see spots when I look about the room. "I created you," I shout "I created this hell. It's mine." nobody is listening "You can't get me out, not if you wanted to. Not if I wanted to." we are alone in a room, you and I. Me, and the mirror me and the winter the winter the winter I shut my eyes and the air explodes and bursts and pops under my eyes and cold black fuzzies catch me when I fall swallow me whole and spit me out, small. bones.

lms if I should ruin my life

I see you everywhere, you know. In other people's voices I hear both your laughter and your cruelty. they are often indistinguishable. in keystrokes a million miles away i hear the same humming, droning comfort. it ties me to my bed and sets me on fire. i see where I've taken you every time I close my eyes, I see where I'm taking you with me every time my heart vomits into the ocean. the pier cannot hold the weight of plum-colored sorrow in my belly. I see you in the mirror. in my thoughts--not always among them. you can hear me. you can hear me. my waistline is going to thank you, and curse you, and tear you to shreds. I hope you're doing fine.