actually peak mental health

I used to prep, wash dishes, and cook at mellow mushroom. I had chronic pain that wasn't NEARLY as bad as it is today, but it was still very debilitating. I told my employer "i cannot stand more than 4 to 6 hours. I CANNOT do shifts longer than this due to my illness." And even though i made my boundaries VERY clear, everyday i worked it was 8 hours at the least and 10 or 12 at the most. I would go up to my manager and say "look i really need to leave, my shift is over, my chronic pain is killing me." And he'd say "we really need to here, you HAVE to push through." And so i did, and after one, ONE month of that job my crps got incredibly worse to the point where i could no longer walk my dog around the block which was .5 miles. I quit, and that was FOUR years ago, and ever since that day I HAVE BEEN BEDRIDDEN AND HAVE TO USE A WHEELCHAIR. It is my biggest regret in life.

My best friend who has seen my whole journey has recently developed undiagnosed chronic pain, and she is in the EXACT same scenario i was 4 years ago. Busting her ass at a pizza place with extreme pain that hurts her so much she tells me "im in so much pain i don't even feel like a person." She doesn't feel LUCID. And her manager and coworkers are saying the same thing "if you don't help us you will let us down, we'll be in the shit."

[Game Start.]

I start off quite simply by just making a basic safety bunker, cause this is the most important part in... the entire challenge. To have a solid place to hide away and more importantly be able to hide from endermen if I need to

well that flew by pretty fast! lets hope it goes by faster the next time.

went to check out that interesting terrain in the distance, its pretty cool

it is the night of day one and this worlds intended purpose to make me exhausted at late nights is certainly working, so i'll be heading off for now and i'll resume operations tomorrow

Good morning! A new day for me, and resuming the night in the End Barrens. It's gonna be more of the same from here on out so I'll try to limit updates to the day turnover and any events that occur during my stay.

I've been thinking about what I even want to do with this bunker by the time I "finish" the official part of the challenge and go to the nether, and I think I will just keep going, it's gonna be fun to build with a bunch of new blocks and actually have resources.

The hard part at the moment is just getting to the nether itself, I have to wait for a wandering trader to spawn and then I have to kill it as soon as it pulls up its bucket. So that's about 20 minutes after it had already spawned, and I would have to dedicate myself to staying within the area.

I've also taken the time to add some new mods to the fray, mainly Music and Melody and Appleskin, which won't affect the base game. It will affect my mental health that's for sure :D

It is also worth mentioning that I have a freecam mod installed, but this is primarily to check to see if I'm going to mine headfirst into a cave, which would completely compromise my base if said cave was more than 3 blocks tall (which they usually are)

And well, the freecam mod also allows for some nice screenshots.

And night falls.

I've been thinking actually, starting an enderman farm might be a smart idea here, I don't have slabs but I also don't really need to worry about that? I think this mountain is tall enough that I can pretty easily make a chute, and then connect it to one of the several tunnels I'll be making.

Also I thought about making this a hardcore challenge... but there's no food, but I did think I would be losing hunger far more quickly (the world is locked on hard by the way, so I would starve to death.)

The morning of day 4, I am sort of wondering if my base of choice is going to make it harder for traders to spawn... I am relatively close to the surface but that might not be enough. Many things to think about... Just me expanding this hallway up to the "enderman farm" if we can even call it that at this point, its not open. Maybe I'll make an enchanting room for it. I just remembered I cant even get books! Why the fuck am I even doing this? Hoglins. Hoglins exist. And trader llamas. I can get the rest of the stuff elsewhere.

Diamonds are found in fortress chests and bastion remnants. Obsidian is just water and lava. Or from bartering, whatever is cheaper by then. I can get emeralds by trading haybales with a wandering trader that has that trade open, and then use those emeralds to buy a sapling. Or I can just get the crimson or warped planks, whatever is cheaper at that moment.

Haybales can be gotten by bonemealing the grass.

It is the morning of Day 5, but before we get to that, some stuff I did the prior night.

I finished laying the foundations of this hallway, and now for the main event.

That actually wasn't too bad, not sure why I reacted so much, might just be the nerves talking. Regardless, this is temporarily considered complete up until I actually get something going. My laptop needs a rest after all of this (very warm to the touch) and I'll see you later! Gonna let this one breathe.

[Game Start.]

I start off quite simply by just making a basic safety bunker, cause this is the most important part in... the entire challenge. To have a solid place to hide away and more importantly be able to hide from endermen if I need to

well that flew by pretty fast! lets hope it goes by faster the next time.

went to check out that interesting terrain in the distance, its pretty cool

it is the night of day one and this worlds intended purpose to make me exhausted at late nights is certainly working, so i'll be heading off for now and i'll resume operations tomorrow

Good morning! A new day for me, and resuming the night in the End Barrens. It's gonna be more of the same from here on out so I'll try to limit updates to the day turnover and any events that occur during my stay.

I've been thinking about what I even want to do with this bunker by the time I "finish" the official part of the challenge and go to the nether, and I think I will just keep going, it's gonna be fun to build with a bunch of new blocks and actually have resources.

The hard part at the moment is just getting to the nether itself, I have to wait for a wandering trader to spawn and then I have to kill it as soon as it pulls up its bucket. So that's about 20 minutes after it had already spawned, and I would have to dedicate myself to staying within the area.

I've also taken the time to add some new mods to the fray, mainly Music and Melody and Appleskin, which won't affect the base game. It will affect my mental health that's for sure :D

It is also worth mentioning that I have a freecam mod installed, but this is primarily to check to see if I'm going to mine headfirst into a cave, which would completely compromise my base if said cave was more than 3 blocks tall (which they usually are)

And well, the freecam mod also allows for some nice screenshots.

And night falls.

I've been thinking actually, starting an enderman farm might be a smart idea here, I don't have slabs but I also don't really need to worry about that? I think this mountain is tall enough that I can pretty easily make a chute, and then connect it to one of the several tunnels I'll be making.

Also I thought about making this a hardcore challenge... but there's no food, but I did think I would be losing hunger far more quickly (the world is locked on hard by the way, so I would starve to death.)

The morning of day 4, I am sort of wondering if my base of choice is going to make it harder for traders to spawn... I am relatively close to the surface but that might not be enough. Many things to think about... Just me expanding this hallway up to the "enderman farm" if we can even call it that at this point, its not open. Maybe I'll make an enchanting room for it. I just remembered I cant even get books! Why the fuck am I even doing this? Hoglins. Hoglins exist. And trader llamas. I can get the rest of the stuff elsewhere.

Diamonds are found in fortress chests and bastion remnants. Obsidian is just water and lava. Or from bartering, whatever is cheaper by then. I can get emeralds by trading haybales with a wandering trader that has that trade open, and then use those emeralds to buy a sapling. Or I can just get the crimson or warped planks, whatever is cheaper at that moment.

Haybales can be gotten by bonemealing the grass.

It is the morning of Day 5, but before we get to that, some stuff I did the prior night.

I finished laying the foundations of this hallway, and now for the main event.

[Game Start.]

I start off quite simply by just making a basic safety bunker, cause this is the most important part in... the entire challenge. To have a solid place to hide away and more importantly be able to hide from endermen if I need to

well that flew by pretty fast! lets hope it goes by faster the next time.

went to check out that interesting terrain in the distance, its pretty cool

it is the night of day one and this worlds intended purpose to make me exhausted at late nights is certainly working, so i'll be heading off for now and i'll resume operations tomorrow

Good morning! A new day for me, and resuming the night in the End Barrens. It's gonna be more of the same from here on out so I'll try to limit updates to the day turnover and any events that occur during my stay.

I've been thinking about what I even want to do with this bunker by the time I "finish" the official part of the challenge and go to the nether, and I think I will just keep going, it's gonna be fun to build with a bunch of new blocks and actually have resources.

The hard part at the moment is just getting to the nether itself, I have to wait for a wandering trader to spawn and then I have to kill it as soon as it pulls up its bucket. So that's about 20 minutes after it had already spawned, and I would have to dedicate myself to staying within the area.

I've also taken the time to add some new mods to the fray, mainly Music and Melody and Appleskin, which won't affect the base game. It will affect my mental health that's for sure :D

It is also worth mentioning that I have a freecam mod installed, but this is primarily to check to see if I'm going to mine headfirst into a cave, which would completely compromise my base if said cave was more than 3 blocks tall (which they usually are)

And well, the freecam mod also allows for some nice screenshots.

And night falls.

I've been thinking actually, starting an enderman farm might be a smart idea here, I don't have slabs but I also don't really need to worry about that? I think this mountain is tall enough that I can pretty easily make a chute, and then connect it to one of the several tunnels I'll be making.

Also I thought about making this a hardcore challenge... but there's no food, but I did think I would be losing hunger far more quickly (the world is locked on hard by the way, so I would starve to death.)

The morning of day 4, I am sort of wondering if my base of choice is going to make it harder for traders to spawn... I am relatively close to the surface but that might not be enough. Many things to think about... Just me expanding this hallway up to the "enderman farm" if we can even call it that at this point, its not open. Maybe I'll make an enchanting room for it. I just remembered I cant even get books! Why the fuck am I even doing this? Hoglins. Hoglins exist. And trader llamas. I can get the rest of the stuff elsewhere.

Diamonds are found in fortress chests and bastion remnants. Obsidian is just water and lava. Or from bartering, whatever is cheaper by then. I can get emeralds by trading haybales with a wandering trader that has that trade open, and then use those emeralds to buy a sapling. Or I can just get the crimson or warped planks, whatever is cheaper at that moment.

Haybales can be gotten by bonemealing the grass.

[Game Start.]

I start off quite simply by just making a basic safety bunker, cause this is the most important part in... the entire challenge. To have a solid place to hide away and more importantly be able to hide from endermen if I need to

well that flew by pretty fast! lets hope it goes by faster the next time.

went to check out that interesting terrain in the distance, its pretty cool

it is the night of day one and this worlds intended purpose to make me exhausted at late nights is certainly working, so i'll be heading off for now and i'll resume operations tomorrow

Good morning! A new day for me, and resuming the night in the End Barrens. It's gonna be more of the same from here on out so I'll try to limit updates to the day turnover and any events that occur during my stay.

I've been thinking about what I even want to do with this bunker by the time I "finish" the official part of the challenge and go to the nether, and I think I will just keep going, it's gonna be fun to build with a bunch of new blocks and actually have resources.

The hard part at the moment is just getting to the nether itself, I have to wait for a wandering trader to spawn and then I have to kill it as soon as it pulls up its bucket. So that's about 20 minutes after it had already spawned, and I would have to dedicate myself to staying within the area.

I've also taken the time to add some new mods to the fray, mainly Music and Melody and Appleskin, which won't affect the base game. It will affect my mental health that's for sure :D

It is also worth mentioning that I have a freecam mod installed, but this is primarily to check to see if I'm going to mine headfirst into a cave, which would completely compromise my base if said cave was more than 3 blocks tall (which they usually are)

And well, the freecam mod also allows for some nice screenshots.

And night falls.

I've been thinking actually, starting an enderman farm might be a smart idea here, I don't have slabs but I also don't really need to worry about that? I think this mountain is tall enough that I can pretty easily make a chute, and then connect it to one of the several tunnels I'll be making.

Also I thought about making this a hardcore challenge... but there's no food, but I did think I would be losing hunger far more quickly (the world is locked on hard by the way, so I would starve to death.)

[Game Start.]

I start off quite simply by just making a basic safety bunker, cause this is the most important part in... the entire challenge. To have a solid place to hide away and more importantly be able to hide from endermen if I need to

well that flew by pretty fast! lets hope it goes by faster the next time.

went to check out that interesting terrain in the distance, its pretty cool

it is the night of day one and this worlds intended purpose to make me exhausted at late nights is certainly working, so i'll be heading off for now and i'll resume operations tomorrow

Good morning! A new day for me, and resuming the night in the End Barrens. It's gonna be more of the same from here on out so I'll try to limit updates to the day turnover and any events that occur during my stay.

I've been thinking about what I even want to do with this bunker by the time I "finish" the official part of the challenge and go to the nether, and I think I will just keep going, it's gonna be fun to build with a bunch of new blocks and actually have resources.

The hard part at the moment is just getting to the nether itself, I have to wait for a wandering trader to spawn and then I have to kill it as soon as it pulls up its bucket. So that's about 20 minutes after it had already spawned, and I would have to dedicate myself to staying within the area.

I've also taken the time to add some new mods to the fray, mainly Music and Melody and Appleskin, which won't affect the base game. It will affect my mental health that's for sure :D

It is also worth mentioning that I have a freecam mod installed, but this is primarily to check to see if I'm going to mine headfirst into a cave, which would completely compromise my base if said cave was more than 3 blocks tall (which they usually are)

And well, the freecam mod also allows for some nice screenshots.

And night falls.

I've been thinking actually, starting an enderman farm might be a smart idea here, I don't have slabs but I also don't really need to worry about that? I think this mountain is tall enough that I can pretty easily make a chute, and then connect it to one of the several tunnels I'll be making.

Also I thought about making this a hardcore challenge... but there's no food, but I did think I would be losing hunger far more quickly (the world is locked on hard by the way, so I would starve to death.)

[Game Start.]

I start off quite simply by just making a basic safety bunker, cause this is the most important part in... the entire challenge. To have a solid place to hide away and more importantly be able to hide from endermen if I need to

well that flew by pretty fast! lets hope it goes by faster the next time.

went to check out that interesting terrain in the distance, its pretty cool

it is the night of day one and this worlds intended purpose to make me exhausted at late nights is certainly working, so i'll be heading off for now and i'll resume operations tomorrow

Good morning! A new day for me, and resuming the night in the End Barrens. It's gonna be more of the same from here on out so I'll try to limit updates to the day turnover and any events that occur during my stay.

I've been thinking about what I even want to do with this bunker by the time I "finish" the official part of the challenge and go to the nether, and I think I will just keep going, it's gonna be fun to build with a bunch of new blocks and actually have resources.

The hard part at the moment is just getting to the nether itself, I have to wait for a wandering trader to spawn and then I have to kill it as soon as it pulls up its bucket. So that's about 20 minutes after it had already spawned, and I would have to dedicate myself to staying within the area.

I've also taken the time to add some new mods to the fray, mainly Music and Melody and Appleskin, which won't affect the base game. It will affect my mental health that's for sure :D

It is also worth mentioning that I have a freecam mod installed, but this is primarily to check to see if I'm going to mine headfirst into a cave, which would completely compromise my base if said cave was more than 3 blocks tall (which they usually are)

And well, the freecam mod also allows for some nice screenshots.

[Game Start.]

I start off quite simply by just making a basic safety bunker, cause this is the most important part in... the entire challenge. To have a solid place to hide away and more importantly be able to hide from endermen if I need to

well that flew by pretty fast! lets hope it goes by faster the next time.

went to check out that interesting terrain in the distance, its pretty cool

it is the night of day one and this worlds intended purpose to make me exhausted at late nights is certainly working, so i'll be heading off for now and i'll resume operations tomorrow

Good morning! A new day for me, and resuming the night in the End Barrens. It's gonna be more of the same from here on out so I'll try to limit updates to the day turnover and any events that occur during my stay.

I've been thinking about what I even want to do with this bunker by the time I "finish" the official part of the challenge and go to the nether, and I think I will just keep going, it's gonna be fun to build with a bunch of new blocks and actually have resources.

The hard part at the moment is just getting to the nether itself, I have to wait for a wandering trader to spawn and then I have to kill it as soon as it pulls up its bucket. So that's about 20 minutes after it had already spawned, and I would have to dedicate myself to staying within the area.

I've also taken the time to add some new mods to the fray, mainly Music and Melody and Appleskin, which won't affect the base game. It will affect my mental health that's for sure :D

It is also worth mentioning that I have a freecam mod installed, but this is primarily to check to see if I'm going to mine headfirst into a cave, which would completely compromise my base if said cave was more than 3 blocks tall (which they usually are)

And well, the freecam mod also allows for some nice screenshots.

Symptoms of PMDD can include: 

Mood swings, depression,  or crying.

Feeling hopeless, anxious or anxiety.

Anger, irritability or a sense of losing control.

Trouble concentrating or “brain fog”,

Changes in sleep or eating habits, including cravings.

Physical symptoms: fatigue, joint or muscle pain, sore breasts, headaches/migraines, bloating or weight gain.

Suicidal thoughts or feelings

Equiping an armor tutorial

It's never done that before so I looked it up and turns out Roku TVs have added all sorts of creepy things in the privacy section since I last checked.

One of which being they take screenshots from what you're watching and send them to third parties to identify it.

Fucking hell! Remember when every fucking device in your life wasn't a spy implanted in your home and working against your interests to try and sell your data? Remember how nice that was??

Remember when the TV was just a tool that would play the things you plugged into it?