The Sydinatorr!!

Like..I failed at everything

I failed to be a good kid

I failed to be a good son

I failed to be a good daughter

I failed to be a good brother

I failed to be a good sister

I failed to be a good sibling

I failed to be a good friend

I failed to be a good artist

I failed to be a good ytber

I failed to be a good ranter

I failed to be a good fandom member

I failed to be a good student

I failed to be a good person

I failed to be good enough.

My body is weak and ugly

My brain is mushy and dumb

My skin is pimpley and oily

My words are bland and stupid

My skills are not enough

I lost my job because of some workers keep messing with my mom

I lost many friends because of my temper and stupid self

I lost myself that I don't even fully achieve yet at all

I lost the meaning of my fucking name that I tried for years to achieve

I'm basically just living because there are people begging me to.

I used to be such a successful person

Saving lifes even

Being a caretaker

Being such good enough

Being someone that was called hero

But now?

I don't even think people love me for my worth

Every drawing I put effort to flops

Every story I write fates away into the pit

I can't even properly feel or believe anything

I feel like people are just muppeting me so I won't cry and sob again

I'm not mature enough, fuck, I don't even know many things people my age supposed to master

I can't understand big words, I always need a simple explanation, I don't know any adult education I suppose to know at this point

I'm like a tall child who often forgets that I'm not a full grown adult but a 19 year old idiot

I cry out of nowhere, I get mental snaps at random things, I panic so much over the simplest mistakes I made

Nothing I do deserves praise or a shine

Nothing I try works out

Nothing ever feels just right

I hate myself

I hate how I look

I hate what I like

I hate everything I say

I hate everything I do

I hate everything about myself

I'm never gonna achieve anything

I'm never gonna be someone memorable

I'm just gonna die in the end and fade into the pit of nothingness

“Now, where on earth is my dearest Bobby? I invited them to game night and yet there’s no sign of them!”

[you feel scared, but also intrigued, so you poke your head out and wave at her]

“Oh! A little.. drawer man? Well, funny seeing you here, my name is Ms.D, but you can just call me Lady D if you prefer”

[Jerry pokes his head out of the drawer hearing someone poking around the office. He curiously eyes the new lady, perking up a bit as he's spotted.]

Oh! Ah... Hello there ma'am! Call me Jerry! Im- this here junk drawer heh-

What brings you to the office?

“Maybe there with Ronaldini again, they always are, with them being in his circus act and all”

But- rest assured, Johnny Splash the preformer ain't goin nowhere-

[Fantina startles and lets out a loud screech.]

"AAAAAAAAHHHH!!"

[But as she realizes there's nothing to actually be afraid of, her scream fades quieter.]

"..."

"Oh my god, HI! I'm Fantina, sorry for screaming at you-"

[She gasps]

"I love your hair!!"

----------------------

And also sorry for scaring you, still getting used to this whole “talking to others without scaring them” thing..

And unfortunately no, but it would be cool!

Say.. I have the feeling you and I could be best buddies!

"I haven't had a real best friend since Gary left the club..."

"!!! Would you want to join my club???"

!!!

You’re saying.. you want me to join YOU’RE club?! As in, you- me- us- just hanging out?

[she stares for a moment, then beams so bright, you’d think she was a star in the night sky]

Oh. My. God. I WOULD LOVE TO!! when’s the next meeting?!

[Fantina startles and lets out a loud screech.]

"AAAAAAAAHHHH!!"

[But as she realizes there's nothing to actually be afraid of, her scream fades quieter.]

"..."

"Oh my god, HI! I'm Fantina, sorry for screaming at you-"

[She gasps]

"I love your hair!!"

----------------------

And also sorry for scaring you, still getting used to this whole “talking to others without scaring them” thing..

And unfortunately no, but it would be cool!

Say.. I have the feeling you and I could be best buddies!