absolute clown shoes

Love character relationships that can only be described as "whatever the fuck these two have going on"

“who is linkin park?” - one shot KO by my younger coworker

also at the end when they ask you "any questions?" and you can't think of anything: ask about parking. even if you don't have a car.

I have an interview today in a couple hours, how did the algorithm know I needed this

Btw when they ask if you have questions some actual good options are stuff like “what’s a typical day like in this role” or “is this job open because someone is leaving or is this a new position”

i have a suggestion

Can’t believe my job makes me do my job on the days I am scheduled to work my job what the fuck

Everyone say thank you sanitation workers we owe you our lives sanitation workers

Like to charge, reblog to cast?

My friend really changed once she became a vegetarian 

its like ive never seen herbivore

i sighed so loud my mom asked me if i was okay and she’s two rooms away

if you're having trouble sleeping the best you can do is put a bright object close to your face and look at it for at least 30 minutes. if that doesn't work you can close your eyes but make sure to think really hard about a bunch of bullshit

just so we’re clear if you’ve never actually seen a cybertruck in person and have only seen photos of them i cannot stress enough how much worse they look in real life. like i honestly don’t know how it’s possible. most things look basically the same in pictures and in real life. but as stupid and ugly as cybertrucks look in photos, every person i’ve spoken to who has seen one in real life agrees that they somehow look even worse in person. and i know you’re thinking to yourself “tah they already look so bad in photos, how can they possibly look even worse in person?” I DONT KNOW. the first time i saw one on the road i was on a phone call and i literally cut myself off in the middle of a sentence just to be like “oh my GOD.” just an incredibly, laughably, unbelievably bad vehicle. i’ve never experienced anything like it. they’re just so bad

no matter how bad things get, the world is still a beautiful place because it has archive of our own in it