i saw you in a dream . . .

"You're right," she stated, blatantly. "No one should have to go through half of the shit I've been through, yet here we are." She let out a humorless laugh. Her life was, and always had been, pathetic in her eyes. Between one parent not giving enough of a shit to stick around and the other choosing her fix over her only child...it was a difficult upbringing. Maybe that's what had led her into the arms of the first man who showed her any sort of positive attention. The latter had led her right into the arms of Arturo, and while Emilia won't complain about his company, she has personal resentment that this is how she gets any sort of positive attention.

The straps of her dress hung past her shoulders, so she held it up by wrapping her arms around herself. She suddenly felt so small, so fragile. Her eyes closed for a moment as she tried to piece together what she should say. When they opened, she found herself staring directly into his eyes. Something in her told her she couldn't lie, not in this moment. "He's a manipulative, lying control freak. You would never know it, though; he's a very good actor." Her red, painted lips curved into a frown. "That's not the worst of it. No, that doesn't even begin to cover it." Emilia physically flinched as she recalled some of the worst memories with her ex. "I was going to die if I didn't leave him. I wasn't allowed to be my own person without punishment." Her eyes dropped to the floor. She could have unloaded her baggage onto him for hours, and it was clear she needed to talk about it, having not confided in anyone else prior to now. "I'm not here to talk about my problems, though."

he studied emilia now , and his heart ached for her . for her to be so terrified at the idea of running into someone again , he could only imagine the things she had been through . it wasn't fair , but she already knew that . " they say god gives his toughest battles to his strongest soldiers , " arturo spoke after a moment , shaking his head as soon as the words were voiced . " i think that's bullshit . of course you are strong for what you've endured , but that isn't why you are strong . . . or resilient , or anything else . you are a strong person , and you are your own person . he may have gotten in your way for awhile , but he has no power over you now . i only hope that your freedom grants you healing as well . "

he took a deep breath , trying to fill his lungs , but he felt like he was running out of oxygen in this closet . still , he wouldn't leave , wouldn't waste a moment with her . " i'm sorry , " he whispered , the thought of her husband harming her tightening his chest . it made him want to punch him . it made him want to kill him . " i don't want you to either , i missed you . i was so worried . " and it seemed he'd had every right to be . he felt selfish for thinking it was about him and not the hell she was going through . " do you need to get away from him ? for tonight , anyway ? i have a room — . . . i don't know for how long , but i can . . . i'd figure something out . "

at first , he scrunched his lips up , debating with himself . he did not trust her . half of him was sure she had some ulterior motive , that she'd come up with some ( probably deserved ) revenge plan to get back at him for whatever had upset her earlier , or something else ( also probably deserved ) . . . but curiosity killed the cat . so he took her hand , and he sank into the mattress beside of her . " so , this is where the enigmatic leena sleeps . "

he wasn't even phased. she did not know how to take that. it was a little hard to dissect his emotions when he was fucking her like this. she could feel herself squeezing him so tightly inside her, like she was trying to convince his dick to stay there. it was intimate and considering the situation, the perfect time to do it. she let herself pretend she could be loved by him. she let herself feel what it felt like to fuck someone she loved. she closed her eyes and let herself just feel. he might have misspoke, or got caught up in the moment, but she knew what she felt and since he had given her the delusion that he loved her, she was going to let herself be loved by him for tonight.

if she could be a girl in love she would do this every single night with him. she already couldn't keep her hands off of him so she imagined she'd be ten times worse if they were like open about their feelings. she would sleep over at his house and leave a toothbrush. she would slowly move her things over and bask in the way he looked at her while she bettered herself for him. she'd have more boundaries at work and with other guys. she would whisper she loved him when he fell asleep. she would stare at him when he wasn't looking and wonder how did she get so lucky. if she could be a girl in love, she could imagine that her life would be better. if he even meant what he said. if she could mean what she wanted to say.

he really did love her . though he didn't realize he said it , a slip of the tongue , he felt it right now , so strongly that he could not pretend it was not there . he couldn't brush it off , ignore it , the way that he usually did . he'd know it for a long time , and it should have been reason enough to run , the first time this feeling had washed over him . with anyone else he would have felt more panic than anything , and he would have been the one to cut ties . with her , it was impossible to stay away . he knew he couldn't convince himself to , so he didn't stop to unpack the feeling . he never let it linger too long . now , he couldn't push it away .

feeling her tighten around him he kept his promise , holding her up as she shook , letting her ride out her orgasm , focusing on keeping his pace through it the best he could . he was trying to hold out a little longer , to feel her as much as he possibly could before this moment was over , to let the strings he'd somehow gotten tangled up in this whole no strings attached arrangement simply exist without trying to unknot them .

all she could do when he looked at her was nod her head in a daze. she would let him stay awake all night with her. she would stay awake all night with him, if that was what he wanted. all she was doing was trying to keep him here. the fact that it sounded like he wanted to stay just made her stupid heart swell. she knew she shouldn't let herself get her hopes up. she knows that he will probably leave the moment her eyes are shut for the night. so...if they could stay awake and have this...she would take it. she didn't need to sleep if it meant he would leave her.

all sense went out the window the moment his tongue touched her. her fingers dug into his hair on instinct, doing exactly what he wanted without her even thinking. she trembled from his touch, losing the battle of keeping her sounds to herself. she tugged at his hair as he gave her pleasure, her sighs turning into moans. she could fall apart like this and thank him for it. she would thank him for it. she was grateful for everything he gave her, allowing her to chase her own high.

remus tried to peer up at her through his eyelashes , catching a glimpse of her expression every time he came up for air . he didn't let himself stop too long , putting his tongue to work again the moment his lungs were full enough he didn't feel lightheaded any longer . the sounds she was making , the way she was moving underneath him , the feeling of her nails scraping his scalp as she pulled his hair . . . she was so hot , he was actually a little in awe . when she asked for more , he happily obliged , adding a third finger aside the other two , increasing the speed of his thrusts .

he loved the sound of his name on her lips . he never wanted her to moan anyone else's like that , never wanted anyone else to have the pleasure of being between her thighs . yet he kept leaving her . he kept giving her reason to replace him . because as much as he wanted her to be with him , as much as he hated the idea of another touching her , as much as he knew she was the best thing for him , he didn't think he was the best thing for her . and there were brief moments were he couldn't be selfish enough to hang on . unfortunately for her , that was all they ever were . . . brief moments before he needed to see her again so badly that he couldn't stay away .

ophelia would never tire of the way her body reacted to him. the shivers, the jolts of life, pure and passionate. the heat that blossomed at her core. the way her fangs ached for him. it was so easy to get lost in the sensation of brom alone. a love like this was strong enough to put her in a trance of its own design. she never wanted to get out of it. she wanted to consume him. she wanted him to become a part of her. she wanted to give him beautiful babies and everything he could ever want. she would bleed for him over and over again, until there wasn't a single drop left, if it meant he would smile.

she guessed she wasn’t okay. she hadn’t been okay in a really long time. ever since she was old enough to do anything she was taking care of someone. she guessed the only real change in her life was that she went from watching her siblings and being in school to watching her siblings and balancing three jobs. if anything, it only got more bleak from there. was this really all her life was going to be? was this it? she was so trapped in her mind trying to find something to feel okay about and she was just…failing. maybe falling to her death was the only way out. maybe it really was the only way she’d get any peace.

when he tugged at her arm she stumbled backward, her palms hitting his chest. she looked up at him in embarrassment, shock, all of the above? she didn’t move away. just breathed harder than she had been when she started and looking at him like a caged animal who didn’t know what to do once being released. was she crying? she didn’t remember that starting back up again. god, she was a mess. she looked away from him quickly, using a hand to wipe her eyes again. “i’m…..okay…” she didn’t even believe herself. “I was just fucking around. it’s like you’ve never had anyone joke back before. didn’t know you couldn’t handle some dark humor…”

tripp cleared his suddenly dry throat , realizing he should probably say something . he ignored her quip about dark humor . it didn't have the same bite it usually did , or maybe he was seeing her in a new light . " it's okay . . . if you're not . i won't pry , but . . . everyone has those days , you know ? " despite what most would believe about carefree , go with the flow , always cracking jokes , happy go lucky tripp — he had quite a few of those . money couldn't buy everything , and it certainly hadn't bought him love of any sort . most of his time was spent feeling alone surrounded by material items . and after their last conversation and some self reflection , he could see why .

" i'm sorry . " it was a light apology , not the one he wanted to give , should give , for tormenting her for so long , for saying things that might not have rolled off her skin as easily as he'd thought . he doubted she'd accept that one . he took a step back away from her now that he was confident she wasn't about to fling herself off the ledge , offering her a small smile . " i didn't mean to interrupt your quiet time . i'm sure you were trying to escape all the dumbasses like me , so i . . . i'll head back down . "

He would never tire of this, of her. It was a miracle he'd survived without her, considering most days he couldn't find his own wallet. Their time apart had been so, so difficult for him. He mourned without her, and he mourned her. That was all in the past now, and they had each other once again. And soon-to-be two additions to their family. Benji looked down at his wife, adoringly, his smile only growing and his heart swelling from how much love he had for her. "Ducklings..." he repeated with a nod, making a mental note to himself about adding something with ducklings to the nursery. It wasn't something he would forget, not when it came to Kirby and their children. Normally, he was constantly scribbling down notes or adding reminders in his phone. No, not this time. His mind was enveloped by her and their twins, whom they had yet to meet.

His eyes were locked on hers, listening to every word she spoke. The mention of sleepwear had his heart skipping a beat or three. God, she was so perfect. Leaning down, he brushed his lips against hers as he spoke. "I can't wait to see it all. I am certain you'll look beautiful in it all...or out of it," the last few words spoken to match her coy tone. "I'm...wonderful." And he was. Benji was elated; he waited all day for her to come home while he painted the nursery. "I'm happy you're home." His lips were still lightly brushing against hers as he talked, and then he properly pressed them against hers, an arm wrapping around her waist.

"I have something to show you now, though." He pulled away, standing up straight. "Close your eyes," he told her, the smile on his face both warm and excited. His arm dropped from her waist, and he took a step back. It wasn't the nursery. He'd show her that at a later date once it was completed. Benji did hope she would love it, though. No, he knew. Besides, he was the only one of the two of them who knew what to expect when the twins came and what to prepare for. It was hard to keep his mouth shut, sometimes, but that's why he had another surprise for her. He wasn't sure if it was really a 'surprise,' but he hoped she would love it.

After taking a breath, he reached into his pocket and dropped down to one knee. "Open," he told her as he held out a velvet ring box that was open to expose the ring in question. A simple gold band with a yellow stone, embellished with small, sparkling diamonds around it. His smile was large and bright as he gazed up at her. "I asked you to renew our vows, but I didn't have a ring. It's only proper that you do." His eyes sparkled, and his heart beat rapidly. "I can only hope you will still say yes," he said half-teasing because he knew damn well the answer. "I love you so much, Kirby. You make me happier than anything, and I can't wait for our family to grow." He was literally counting down the days. "Please continue to make me the happiest man alive."

of course it was a yes . it was a yes then , it was a yes now , and it would be a yes every single tomorrow she had left . choosing benji was the best decision she'd made in her entire life . kirabella knew that . leaving him had been the worst . and the hardest . she wished she could go back to that woman a few years ago , so broken , so empty , so alone and longing just to be held by her husband , the only person in the world her heart would ever love so completely , and tell her to just breathe . to not run away . or come back sooner . but every single moment led to this , and kirby wasn't sure she'd ever been happier . she had more to lose than ever before , but she was so grateful for being in the here and now . twenty years to the date and he was still choosing her . she would be the most foolish woman alive if she didn't choose him back .

only when she blinked a moment later did she realize tears were streaming down her face , ruining the makeup she'd worked so hard on earlier today . she didn't care . she was pretty sure she was crying harder than the first time he'd asked , but it was like a faucet had been turned and it was out of her control . she'd been so emotional lately , and it didn't help that he looked so handsome staring up at her right now , his eyes literally shining . " those damn hormones , " she laughed at herself , waving her hand in front of her face to dry the tears , taking just another second to catch her breath .

" benjamin , " she spoke again , carefully taking the ring from the box , finding herself breathless all over again as she realized how beautiful it was , how her it was . " the best name i've ever been called is mrs . montgomery . " the ring pinched between her forefinger and thumb , she held it out to him . the first time he'd asked , her hands had been shaking so hard she could barely slip it on . now they were steady . she had known then , there had not been a doubt in her mind . but this time , she knew it was until death do them part . she could not lose him again . twenty years later , they would be wearing matching wedding bands , and twenty years after that , god willing . " now , you better put this damn ring on my finger right now . "

"uh huh," was all she said for a while. she kind of just let him have his little debate over jumping or not. she figured that was fair enough for all of the years of torture. the least he could do was want to kill himself one time over this. she knew she had thoughts of it herself....enough. all the time. "so you've thought about it but you haven't. gee, what a gentleman." chivalry was dead and whatever this was...was just a fucking mess, really. she should have just told him to jump and let it stay with that. she could have slapped him. but she didn't. just watched him make a fool of himself as she had so many times before.

"shame," she added after a beat. "i would have done it tonight. i mean, this party sucks, life sucks, but that could have been a nice distraction." she knew she didn't look particularly sexy. she didn't dress for a party, she dressed like she was going to be up all night trying to drag her siblings home after they drank too much. "if you jump you'll probably die and break your legs, by the way. but don't worry, you probably won't feel it." she stood up, walked over to the ledge of the roof. "honestly...probably not the worst idea....just letting yourself fall...god knows i've thought about it..."

" right , " was all he said at first , dumbfounded . he didn't love the insinuation that she was so sick of him following her around she'd fuck him to get him to leave him alone , or that he was only useful when he was the only option , or whatever it was that was probably being implied . . . but she'd also said it'd be a nice distraction . he was way too sober to be this confused at the moment . then again , tripp did spend most of his life confused . it was kind of just his brand , at this point .

his eyebrows furrowed even more when she stood up , moving closer to the ledge . " okay , that — that was a joke , hazel , a bad joke . " stepping forward , he reached out to grab her arm . she didn't seem drunk , but he didn't want to take any chances . he would rather her punch him in the stomach than fall off the roof . " let's take a step back , " he suggested , gently tugging her away from the edge and closer to him . " hey , you can tell me to fuck off , i'd get it , but — are you . . . you good ? you . . . okay ? "

he was honestly putting her through emotional gymnastics and she was so turned on that she didn’t care. bea loved him. she loved the teasing as much as she loved when he just took. the only part she didn’t like was when it started to feel like a test. most of the time that was something her own mind had created so that she could convince herself there was a pass or fail reason as to why he ended up leaving her the next time. her mind kept through hoops on fire to blame her for him leaving every single time. maybe if she had pleased him better or reacted better….there was always a reason. even when there just wasn’t.

she hadn’t found the nerve to touch him again yet. her hands were bawling her sheets so hard she was sure she could tear through the fabric if her nails dug in deep enough. her eyes opened right after he had stuck his finger in his mouth and her eyes could have rolled back in her head just from the sight. she was so determined to not give him a reason to want to leave her again. she was overthinking every move she made. it was kind of impressive considering how much she had drank before he showed up.

she was saying to take it as slow as he wanted , that she could wait , she could take it . but it was not a test or a punishment , and it was not about him . as much as remus wanted to touch her , he wanted to do it more for her benefit than his own . as much as he wanted to kiss her and taste her and feel her , he wanted her to let him take care of her . . . since he kept doing such a terrible job of it in every other way . it wouldn't undo the hurt he caused her , and would continue to cause her , but he wanted to make her feel wanted , loved . he wanted to give her everything he could not say in words .

" i would stay awake all night if you wanted me to . " he held her gaze , hoping she believed him , hoping that she knew he meant it . the sight of her wrapping her lips around his finger already had him feeling things in a record amount of time , but he ignored the desire that sent a shiver up his spine , pulling his finger out of her lips slowly so he could move lower on the bed . even when it came to her own pleasure she was thinking about what he wanted , and it felt cruel at this point to make her wait for anything at all unless she asked him to take it slower .

when her brain started to work again her arms wrapped around his shoulders. she held him so tightly to her she was afraid he would disappear and she would wake up from a dream if she let go. she didn't care if someone saw her. she didn't care if she ruined her own life or made her parents upset or lost everything she ever knew. if she could keep holding onto him, it would all be worth it. everything would be worth it. "finn..." she whispered, head buried into his chest. she felt so safe, she felt so content. it felt too real and not real at all.

did he want to fuck her or something? he wouldn't be the first former tormentor to try and do that. guys seemed to love treating her like shit to her face and in public, but begging for her the moment doors were shut. she had long accepted she was not the type of girl to have an actual boyfriend. she was just a fun time, not a long time. sometimes, she wasn't even sure if she was a fun time or a way to pass the time. regardless, if that was tripp's reason to reentering her life, she was just about vulnerable enough to let him.

"did we?" she asked, genuinely curious. maybe he had seen her slip away and was trying to get her alone. maybe he really was trying to get air. she didn't have a clue when it came to this guy. "or was this the plan all along? like, okay let's just get it out in the open. did you come up here because you're trying to tire me out until i sleep with you? like, i can't figure out another reason why you keep running into me. i don't really believe in fate or anything sentimental like that so just be honest....and if that's not it and i'm wrong, i'll take that and move on. it's really not gonna keep me up at night."

but that feeling was quickly replaced with something kin to alarm . his eyebrows shot up when she came right out and asked if he was trying to ' tire her out until she slept with him ' , and he wasn't even sure how to take that . that was certainly not his intention . he'd gave out on the hope of her ever looking at him as anything more than an unfunny loser that was trying way too hard long before they'd parted ways .

" no , of course not . " he said it so fast , tripp caught it , how it could give off the wrong impression , especially with her sitting here insinuating that the only reason anyone would seek her out was to bed her , and suddenly he was stumbling over words trying to fix any chance of it being taken the wrong way . " i mean , not of course not like i wouldn't . i obviously would . i mean , if you wanted to , obviously . it's not like i haven't thought about it before . oh , no . no , i haven't ! fuck , why did i just — fuck . " he didn't fix it . he made it worse . so , so much worse . for a moment he said nothing at all . then he just looked out at the sky . " . . . you think this roof is high enough it'll put me out of my misery if i jump , or just break my legs ? "

sofia felt weird. despite the way the last party she went to went, she still decided it was a good idea to go to another one. a different host so she didn't think much of it. it was in some abandoned house with more rooms than what felt safe. she figured getting under someone new and getting too drunk to remember it was the way to go. her first mistake was setting her drink down. a rookie mistake with a party that was in full swing. she had set her drink down and picked it up just as fast and now...now her head was spinning.

so she found an empty room in the creepy party house. sitting on the edge of the bed she took a deep breath. maybe she needed to head home. call the uber now, pass out at home or something. she was a little disappointed she didn't really get to mingle much but she supposed she would live. before she could get up and figure out her next step a shadowy figure appeared in the doorway. she felt the hairs on her arms stand and suddenly felt twice as alert. she couldn't make out a face at all. just a tall, shadowy figure, and oh...oh no. oh no. "ghost..." she slurred, her hands digging into the bedsheets to steady herself. ".....not you again...."

caden had not gotten bored . . . but he'd gotten busy . unfortunately , he did not have enough time to toy with sofia after their first run in , and their second ( third , technically ) at the coffee shop . he'd had to do some traveling , had to focus too much on work , and it just wasn't feasible to try to squeeze in some quality time with his boo . but , as it turned out , he told himself it was better this way . distance made the heart grow fonder . it would make their reunion more . . . memorable . he'd planned it for weeks now , right down to the nitty , gritty details . nudged his friends to throw a party . made sure word got around . made sure she didn't catch sight of him here . made sure two very important cups got mixed up . and now , here they were .

he'd been right . it had definitely made his feelings stronger . finally he was seeing her face to face again , no screen between the two of them , and he wanted to walk to her more than ever , pierce the blade of his knife directly into her sternum , press the tip into her bottom lip until it bled then kiss them clean while the light faded from her eyes , make her beg and scream and cry — . . . " sofia , " he greeted her , not yet moving from the doorway . she wouldn't be going anywhere . " you haven't forgotten about little old me ? i'm flattered . " he took a single step into the light of the room so she could see the mask that was staring back at her . " parties are such social events . what are you doing up here . . . all . . . alone ? "

her whine was partly an answer itself , and he started to make slow circles , the way she was holding onto him somehow the thing that was sending him into another mental spiral . he had never felt so . . . wanted by anyone . in any way . being here with her like this uprooted every past experience , and it began to heal some part of him that had always been so desperate to just be seen , to just be enough . if he wasn't careful , he could blurt out the l word right then and there , a feeling he'd always been sure of with thorne but was quickly realizing didn't change when it was ivy .

"Don't apologize," she whispered. "I am too." His lips were back on hers, all that needed to be said having been said. They were both nervous; that was natural, and it was okay. It was a shared feeling and experience for both of them. Kissing him made things easier. She didn't have to focus on anything but the feeling of his lips against hers. When he bit her bottom lip and slid a finger inside of her, she gasped. Her body tensed for a moment, but quickly relaxed. Even just a finger had her feeling pleasure.

her lips seemed to leave a trail of electricity against his skin , and he shivered beneath them , each brush of her lips , each stroke of her hand sending bursts of static to his brain . he had never wanted anyone like he wanted her right now . . . except , well , her , when he didn't even have a face to pair with her alias . when her lips found his again , he did not hesitate to kiss her back harder , wanting to prove to her that he didn't think she would break . wanting to prove to her how much he wanted her . it was all he could think about . it was consuming him . his cock twitched in her hand and he gasped softly against her lips , getting lost in the feeling of kissing her , being touched by her .