The Fever sets in while we sleep

a CEO walks into his office “any messages?” he asks his assistant “two anons want to know who tom petty is and one just says ‘post your ballsack’” “got it. check my dashboard” “that skeleton gif you like is back again” he rubs his chin pensively “mm. reblog that”

theres evidence jesus was an orc. with a battle axe and everything. and green as fuck as well

this is how everyone on this website acts

Thats not true i dont think i act like this

accused of using too many ellipses... don't care... there's always more to come...

It's literally crazy luck that I've only ever come across nails ever since I got my hands on my awesome hammer

what I love about this post is that you can ignore the last 4 words of it and it still makes sense albeit in a different way

Some of you people don’t clean the lint tray in between loads and I can tell jsut by the way you post

fuck does lint have to do w bustin loads LOL

oh like clothes

This post was laid like a trap in the grass for unsuspecting animals like you to wander by and prove that cum comes before laundry on tumblr dot org

I haven’t ate anything since 11 Bruh I’m starving

damn an u how old now?

Does anyone else ever have a sort of phantom physical sense when there's something ready to paste in the clipboard. It feels like I've got something in my right hand and when I click ctrl-v I put it down.