The Beauty Queen

        “Oh my God.”  His eyes open wide. They open wide.  “You’re offering me water.”  He states the obvious and continues staring. Weird? Yes. Is the weirdness of his actions entirely unbeknown to him? Yes. This is the kindness of a stranger that he wasn’t expecting and, so, when caught by surprise like he has been, Danny has no other response to offer other than an uncomfortable stream of consciousness in a long string of confusion and choppy half finished sentences and words.  “That’s so nice of you. I-That’s so nice. No, oh my God. I’m okay I—I’m fine. This is fine. Fine.”

She wasn’t sure what he’d been expecting, but his response wasn’t it. She was glad that he had thought she was being kind, but offering him water wasn’t such a big deal. It was pretty much the least she could do. “Oh, it’s only water,” she said, waving a hand dismissively. “Are you sure you don’t need any? All the convenience stores in this part of the city hike up the prices on bottles of water, so it might be a good idea if you take it just in case you get another tickle in your throat later.” The way he was speaking reminded her of the way she spoke right before she had one of her panic attacks. He didn’t seem anxious, but she wanted to be certain. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

Yennifer let out a small of relief. “Thank you so much.” she said as she fought the urge to look behind her. The brunette shook her head when the other mentioned the police. “No I have a feeling that they won’t be of much help. I would much rather call my brother so he can scare him or threaten him or both. Plus I feel like as soon as he sees the cops, he’ll disappear like a ninja like nothing ever happened." 

Sutton felt marginally better when the stranger said that her brother could put the creep in his place. As much as she wished she could give the man a stern talking to, she knew that “How long has he been following you? He doesn’t know where you live, does he?” She wondered whether her concern was a bit much. She didn’t want to smother this woman with her nervousness, especially since they were strangers. “I’m Sutton, by the way.”      

Ally gestured with her hand as if it were no big deal. “Oh, please. I mean, I am of course busy, but who is too busy for charity? Especially this time of year in Montreal. It’s freezing. I take my daughter as much as I can to the shelter to give back. It’s so important, right? I make sure she’s thankful for all she has. I don’t want her thinking this life she has, charmed and lovely, is normal. We’re just lucky, incredibly so.” Ally warmly smiled as she stepped off in her closet, changing into a dress and heels. She took out her iPhone, pressing on Siri. “Siri, remind me to call Khloe and Kourtney Kardashian later to collaborate on jacket idea. Also, remind me to call back Zac Posen, Rachel Zoe and Kate Spade.” She said, simply and smiled up at Sutton. “I’m sure my fellow designers can pitch in too, if you need it. People tend to be so giving during the holiday season, which is lovely. Montreal is known for its friendliness. Are you from here, darling?” Ally asked and gasped. “Where are my manners? Come on downstairs, I’ll get you a cup of tea or coffee, whatever you want.” 

Sutton was more than a little surprised that Ally took Charlotte to volunteer at the homeless shelter, but she was impressed. “That’s great. Man, I wish my parents had done that for me when I was young. To tell you the truth, I’ve never done anything like this before. One of my new years resolutions was to think of other people more, and I thought this would be a good way to kick start the year of selflessness.” When Ally stepped into her closet to change, Sutton got a tiny peek inside. It looked even bigger than her own closet. She had to push away her jealousy; this wasn’t a competition, she reminded herself. “You know the Kardashians?” she asked, her voice dripping with awe. “Is Khloe as cool as she seems?” She gasped. “Wait, you know Kate Spade? I’m wearing her shoes,” she said, sticking her foot out to prove it. “Oh my goodness, that would be amazing of you. You’re being so generous. I’m sure it’ll mean a lot to the people we’re helping. I’m from the States, actually. I always say that Canada’s the only place north of Virginia where people are as sweet as the South,” she said with a smile. “Oh, tea would be wonderful,” she said, following Ally down the stairs. “That dress you’re wearing – did you make it? It’s beautiful. The stitching in the back looks so intricate. It must have taken ages.”

Riley studied Sutton’s reaction, searching for something he was definitely hoping not to find. If there was any hint of sadness, he would’ve instantly felt guilty. He’d googled his heart out before arriving with Sutton to the doctor’s office. How maternal instincts kicked in; and how raising a child was supposed to appeal to a woman’s nature. Riley didn’t see a single thing of that, and he let out the breath he had been holding when he finally released her hand. “Thank fucking God,” he rubbed the back of his neck, slumping in the chair as Sutton cleaned off the gel from her stomach. 

Riley stood up when she got down, though he didn’t expect her to take his hands. He looked back at her, smiling slightly, “I’ll tell Kyle that you plan on kicking him out of your life, too,” he joked, squeezing her hands. It was abnormal for him to feel this careful; gentleness had never been one of his attributes. He was used to taking and reminding people that he was definitely not the hero at the end of the book. 

“Next time? Next time, we’re using a fucking condom,” Riley grumbled, dropping one of her hands to pull her head closer as he kissed her.

“Kyle’s not a brat,” she said. “I think you’re the only brat in my life at the moment. You should feel special.” After she’d said the words though, she couldn’t help but wonder whether Riley really would be in her life anymore. Now that they knew there was no baby, he had no responsibility to her. He never had to see her again if he didn’t want to.

But then he kissed her, and the worry faded away. Butterflies danced around her stomach like she was in middle school again. She kissed him back by instinct, dropping his hand and running her fingers through his hair. When she pulled away moments later, she placed her hands on his chest and studied his face carefully. "Did you do that on purpose?” she asked stupidly, as if he might have somehow pressed his lips to hers accidentally. “I’ve never thought about it, but I think maybe... maybe I’ve half-wanted you to do that since we were fifteen.”

“Wait,” she said, blinking a few times as his words came back to her. “You want it to happen again?” Slowly, a grin spread across her face. He’d known that she wanted it, but this was the first time he told her that he wanted it too. “You want to have sex with me again because I’m amazing in bed, and you think I’m gorgeous,” she teased, giving him a pat on the chest.

Ally smiled as she sat up, the annoyed looked disappearing. This was the red head that liked her and her designs. “Aw. No Liam Hemsworth? How sad, but you’re about the next best thing, darling. A sweetheart. Come on in.” She said, getting out of bed, her blonde curls still perfect as she put on her robe. “Aw, you are? That’s lovely. I’d love to donate. I can even make some coats for them, mittens too. I have a ton of kid coats around, from Charlotte. I’d love to donate.” 

Sutton sighed when Ally sat up and invited her in, relieved that the blonde wasn’t too annoyed that she’d disturbed her. Despite her intimidating exterior, Ally had always been kind to her. “That would be incredible of you, but are you sure you have the time? I know you’re a busy woman,” she said with a smile.  The other woman was younger than her, but to Sutton, she seemed like she had her life put together much more. “I’m so happy with how giving everyone has been. I’ve never done anything like this before, but it’s been so easy; almost everyone has been so eager to help.”

Riley wasn’t used to absolute silence. Sure, he could sit by himself, not worry about a single thing, but only when he was drunk out of his mind or even high on something. It wasn’t often that he dabbled into drugs, but he had his lower moments. Recently, however, he’d managed to stay away. He’d focused on not falling apart, for Sutton and their possible child’s sake. He didn’t need to be a dead beat father like his had. He glanced at Sutton, unable to read the emotions on her face before he looked back down at his hands that were clasped on his lap. Riley’s body was hunched forward, like he could protect himself from whatever news was coming their way.

He’d agreed to go, and he wasn’t exactly regretting it. New year, new him, right? Riley had vaguely remembered the party itself, where he’d drank away the rest of himself so he wouldn’t have to deal with whatever 2017 brought him. “As long as you don’t run out the door, I won’t,” he answered, looking over at Sutton until the doctor called her last name out. 

Riley sat wordlessly besides Sutton, reaching out to push some of her red hair out of her face and behind her ear. He wasn’t sure where that had come from, and he pulled his hand back towards himself, only to have it intercepted by Sutton’s hand. He laced their fingers together, looking nervous for the first time in his life. Riley put a hand over his face, rubbing his jaw before he stared at the monitor. There wasn’t any noise, no sound of a heartbeat, no little image of some walnut in Sutton’s stomach. 

“If there was a baby, it’s no longer there.” The nurse sounded wary, like the news might cause them pain or some other negative emotion.

“No baby?” Riley repeated, the weight immediately rising off his chest. “Sutts, no baby. We’re not having a baby,” he laughed, turning to look at her so she would open her eyes. He let his hand rest on her cheek, “False alarm, girl scout. We’re not going to be parents.”

Sutton heard the nurse’s words, but she couldn’t process them. It was almost as if she were speaking another language. But when Riley spoke and she heard the relief in his voice, she let out a breath that she hadn’t realized she’d been holding. Tentatively, she opened one eye to peek at the monitor. It was true. There was no baby. She felt so stupid for the narrative she’d created in her head, the images of her dropping the baby off at daycare and Riley picking him up, of her mother trying to convince her to get him into toddler modeling, of spending her weekends sitting through Little League baseball games. She hadn’t wanted the diapers and strollers, but they’d seemed inevitable. She sat up straight, her eyes wide as she double and triple checked the screen. There was no baby. 

She felt Riley’s hand on her cheek, and she dragged her eyes to his. “We’re not gonna be parents,” she repeated, her smile wider than it had been since before this whole ordeal had started. The nurse handed her some paper towels before excusing herself and leaving the room, and Sutton wiped the gel off of her stomach before pulling her shirt down. “We’re not having a baby,” she said stupidly, her eyes aglow. 

She hopped down from the examination table and took both his hands in hers, buzzed on her happiness. “It’s a good thing,” she said, slipping back into their familiar banter, “’cause I don’t need more than one bratty Henderson in my life.” 

Sutton had sat silently in the waiting room, staring at the fish tank on the wall opposite her. For what might have been the first time in her life, she ignored the trashy tabloids that adorned the coffee table. She didn’t have the energy to pretend to care about clothes or make up or celebrities. Across the room, a woman was on the phone, recounting all the groceries she’d bought earlier in the day. Behind the front desk, two receptionists were brainstorming ideas for a coworker’s birthday present. In the tank, an angelfish chased a goldfish around and around. It seemed cruel to her that everyone else’s lives were continuing as usual while hers was falling apart. She wasn’t ready for a baby.

After what felt like years, a nurse called her name. She glanced at Riley beside her as butterflies began to swarm in her stomach. “It means a lot to me that you’re here,” she said, absentmindedly picking at her nails and forcing a small smile. “You’re not gonna back out on me now, are you?” 

She told herself that she only had to be brave for a few minutes, then she stood and followed the nurse to the exam room. She sat on the examination table, and when the ultrasound technician entered, she answered his questions on autopilot. No, she wasn’t on any medications. No, she hadn’t drank or smoked since she took the positive test. Yes, Riley was the father. When he told her to, she laid back on the table and lifted her shirt. The gel felt colder on her stomach than she’d imagined that it would. Wordlessly, she took Riley’s hand in hers and held on tightly. When she felt the probe on her stomach, she squeezed her eyes shut. “I can’t look at the monitor,” she said, gripping onto Riley’s hand. “Are we havin’ a baby?”

Ally smiled, shaking her head. “Only joking, darling. And maybe, if you have good taste, and by the look of that pretty thing on you, I’d say you do.” She flashed a smirk, happily. “Queen of Montreal? If only that were an actual job, right?” She chuckled. “Pretty name. Ally, Ally Harrington. And thank you, doll. Made it myself. 

Sutton felt herself relax at the compliment. “Thank you,” she said, genuinely touched. She waved a waiter over from across the room and handed the blonde a drink from his tray. “I think I’d rather be the princess. All of the perks with none of the responsibility.” At the introduction, Sutton’s hand flew to her chest in embarrassment. “Oh my goodness, you’re Ally Harrington? I’ve been obsessed with your dresses for years. I didn’t expect you to be so... young and well, pretty.”

Sutton’s words made Riley choke on the water he’d been drinking. “Hurt you?” he rasped, his eyes watering thanks to his gag reflex that had kicked in, and not to mention the surprise he’d felt. His throat burned now from coughing, and he took another drink to soothe the pain, “Seriously?” he said the word hesitantly, not as much heat behind it as before. “Sutton, you can’t just say shit like that. Hurt you like what? Take the baby away? No – I wouldn’t do that. We can get along when we’re normal, but sometimes we try too fucking hard to be angry,” he said finally, resting his chin on his hand. “So what were you fuckin’ saying?”

Riley didn’t say anything for a few moments, letting their emotions calm down at least a little. This whole minefield of emotions was still brand new to him, and he waited as patiently as he could. “You’re not reckless, well, I mean one time you were. Sleeping with me and not using a condom could be filed under that.” He could’ve laughed at the earnest expression on her face, but found himself instead thinking about what he could say. Riley wasn’t a gentle, honest guy. No, he preferred to lie and drink his way through life. He lived on Easy Street and no one could take that from him. No one but Sutton and his possible child, that is. “You wanna fuck,” he deadpanned, finding this conversation completely unconventional. “You want dinner and a movie first or something?”

Sutton raised an eyebrow, her eyes widening. Riley thought she was worried about him taking the baby away from her? That had been the least of her concerns. If anything, she was worried that he wouldn’t be present enough as a father, but she knew if she said so, he’d yell at her again. “No, it’s nothing,” she said, picking at her cuticles as she tried to think of the best way to explain her anxieties. “It’s just... okay, well, you know how you always make fun of me for the... the pictures?” Her cheeks burned, and she glanced around the restaurant quickly to make sure that nobody was listening before looking back at Riley. “If I’m pregnant, then I don’t know, this kind of seems like you’ve hit the jackpot for your Sutton material. I mean, if you really wanted to get me good, all you’d have to do is post the story online – how I showed up drunk and beggin’ you to have sex with me, how we forgot the condom.... You’d remind everyone what I joke I am.” She knew that she was being sort of unfair. Though he’d always been cruel to her, she didn’t really think that he hated her that much. But then again, she had a history of trusting the wrong people. “Do I have to prepare myself to be humiliated again?”