Hi

2. Before you I didn’t know what fireworks felt like. You kissed me and the world got brighter. When I was growing up my mum always talked about finding the spark. Where they touch you, soemthing as simple as brushing past your arm, and you can feel it all the way down to your toes. I never really thought this spark existed. That is until I met you. You light my entire body on fire and it god damn terrifies me.

3. No ones ever tried to fight for me. I’m easy to leave, something insignificant that people use to waste time. But you, every single day you fight for me, for us. Make sure I know you want me around. Show me for once what being taken care of is actually like. After everything maybe you’re what I’ve been waiting for.

We were already over. So so over. I can’t remember now why we ever thought it would be a good idea for you to come and get your stuff from my house. To come and get every piece of you that you had left behind until there was no proof that you’d ever been here at all. But we did and you did and you walked back through my door. Within minutes it was like noting had changed. I laughed at all your dumb jokes, while we watched the tv show we had been watching back before you left and my god was it what I had been wanting. What I had been craving in the weeks since I had last seen you. But as I sat there next to you I realized this would be the last time I ever saw you. The last time you’d smile at me. The last time you’d make fun of me. I wish I could say that this made it easier. It didn’t. Especially when you kissed me. When we went upstairs. And after. When I layed in your arms. When I listened to your heart beat. Laying in the man you loves arms and knowing that he doesnt want you anymore is a kind of pain I wouldn’t wish on anyone.

If there’s one thing I can confindently say, it’s that take those moments, the ones where you had no idea it was the end and charish that. Charish the good, loving moments that became the last ones. Take comfort in those moments because at least in them you were happy, you had no idea what was coming. Because knowing, we think will make the goodbyes less painful. It doesn’t.