the sound of rain

your parents rarely acknowledged you outside of this, if ever. your mere existence was a disappointment to them, for you were supposed to be a boy - your birth had been traumatic for your mother, meaning she couldn’t have any more children and your father couldn’t remarry due to the optics of it all. you were the wrong child, in the wrong body, and not a day of your life had gone by without you being told it.

and so, here you were. too quiet for your own good. secretly anxious, always going above and beyond in hopes someone would notice, not that they ever did. you’d retreat to your room, lock your door quietly and simply lay on your bed, cherishing all of your sweet plushies, and pinks and creams of your room as though it was your only friend. your only solace.

you were a prisoner in your own house, and yet your room had become your home, your jail cell that you felt a warped sense of comfort in. this was your space. no one was allowed in.

but, outside of it, you were of course victim to whatever whims those around you had wanted.

as a result, you were betrothed.

to a monster, some had muttered in your presence, making your chest tighten. to a man whose name was spoken carefully, even when people were alone - a name that demanded attention, respect and most importantly, acknowledgement.

jeon jungkook.

he was hardly just anyone. no, jungkook was head of the biggest mob in the country, with ties to multiple international groups that also saw him as their leader. power fucking oozed off of him in a way that had most shivering at the thought of fucking over a man like that, which is why your parents jumped at the opportunity of offering you up to him.

you were shocked when you heard he had accepted the offer. that was a few months ago, and a wedding was being planned without you ever have even meeting the man. you knew he was young in age, not yet touching his thirties, and some even had let you know he was handsome, though you weren’t sure if those were words uttered in fear or honesty.

it didn’t matter what you wanted. didn’t matter if you were scared, or unwilling; and certainly didn’t matter if you didn’t want this whatsoever. he was to be your husband, and more importantly - you were going to be his bride.

—

the dining room was already full when he arrived.

your parents had invited him, alongside a myriad of his men, over to your home, a dinner and celebration a few days before the wedding. that’s what they called it anyway, but you knew what it really was.

it was so he could see you. approve of you.

it made your stomach churn to think he could dismiss you. you truly weren’t sure what would be worse - his approval, or his rejection.

men had been arriving for hours now, many early in hopes to scope the room before he arrived, so they could understand the overall atmosphere of the place. tensions were high as you played with the hem of your sweet little dress. pink, with frills on the sleeves, a neckline that dipped just slightly, enough to entice but modest enough to be deemed appropriate given your status.

you could hear cars outside, feeling your chest tighten slightly before getting in position, just as you had been taught.

men rose from their seats instinctively, their chairs scraping backwards loudly whilst their voices halted mid sentences, unified by their attention landing on the figure walking through the door. jeon jungkook didn’t need to announce himself - his presence alone did that for him. black suit tailored to his body like it had been cut with intent, as opposed to fabric, shoulders so broad and posture unyielding. he carried power the way the other men in the room carried breath.

you stood beside your parents, your hands folded neatly in front of you, spine straight, chin slightly dipped.

pink. that was the first thing he registered.

a soft, babydoll dress in the palest shade, fabric floating around your thighs, sleeves brushing your arms like petals. your hair fell down your back in gentle waves, glossy, deliberate; too pretty for a house like this. you looked like something misplaced - a sweetness that didn’t belong among smoke, liquor and men who spoke in threats disguised as deals.

his gaze locked onto you and didn’t move.

you felt it immediately.

the way his eyes were grazing up and down your body, resting on your face whilst his jaw tightened visibly. you couldn’t tell if he liked the sight of you, and you could feel the familiar churn of your stomach return. your lashes lowered, a shake beginning to overcome your hands as you all walked into the dining room to be seated properly.

jungkook’s seat was supposed to be at the head, with your father at the other side, a symbolic seating plan. instead, he picked the chair beside you.

not in front.

not the head.

but a measly, centre seat.

the chair scraped as it dragged against the floor, the room suddenly quiet, and your shoulders sat high in anticipation. his thigh brushed yours underneath the table as he took his seat, subtle. deliberate. his knee then pressed into the soft inside of your leg, claiming space you hadn’t offered. you stiffened slightly, fingers tightening in your lap and breath suddenly coming out shallow.

he didn’t look away, his gaze firmly on the people around him, and you.

his hand rested on his own thigh at first, before shifting. just slightly.

fingers brushed your knee once. twice, before they began sliding upwards, curling around the delicate hem of your dress. the contact was light enough to be deniable, yet slow enough to feel intentional. you trembled, thighs pressing together instinctively whilst your heart continued to pound loud enough for him to hear.

he watched as your lips parted, clinging to every micro expression you gave him.

you didn’t move his hand away. you weren’t aware you were allowed to.

conversation carried on around you, men chatting, laughing, glasses clinking and food being eaten. jungkook remained quiet, rarely conversing, eating to be polite but refraining from a drink. he was controlled in every single thing he would do, and yet his fingers continued to flex against your skin, as though it was his every right - he had yet to even converse with you.

the world felt reduced to the heat of his touch and the weight of his attention. you could hardly eat, forcing yourself to nibble as much as you could but you were shackled to the growing feeling in your stomach, it was both foreign and terrifying. you stared at your plate without seeing it, caught between something far more dangerous than you’d anticipated.

want.

eventually, the shift happened. the women stood.

it was automatic, rehearsed - chairs sliding backwards and napkins folded, heads bowed lightly as they retreated from the table. the men were beginning to get rowdier, as they breached the topic of illegal crime, weapons sat on the table leisurely as though it was normal.

you followed once your mother rose, legs unsteady as you stepped away, his hand lingering until the very last second before slipping from your skin. both of your eyes connected, for a second and nothing more, but it was enough to have your throat visibly constrict.

you all but bolted up to your room once you were out of sight, your heart pounding and eyes closing shut tightly.

upstairs felt unreal.

your room welcomed you like a held breath, familiar and soft, pinks and creams wrapping around you as you shut your door quietly and leaned against it. your chest rose and fell too fast, fingers trembling as you crossed the length of your room and climbed onto your bed.

you curled in on yourself, knees drawn up, dress riding high on your thighs without you even realising. the fabric bunched at your waist, exposing the simple but sweet cotton underneath - innocent, unguarded.

downstairs, jungkook endured.

he couldn’t stand the men around him, your father making him feel sick to his very stomach. a pathetic man, one he had only humoured when he had actually looked into his marriage proposal. he wanted to reject, scoffing at the idea of marrying into a family like this, only to look into you and finding the sweetest thing he had ever laid his eyes upon.

big eyes and soft hair, your lips were the first thing he noticed. always so bitten, plump - he wanted to ruin them with his own immediately. he dreamt of you for weeks before proceeding with your father’s proposition, and hallucinated you for the months leading up to today. he wanted to introduce himself sooner, he needed to - but he lived across the country, and he was an insanely busy man.

being here. touching you. smelling you. god, it was ruining him.

and so, he pushed his chair back, catching the attention of everyone immediately.

“excuse me.” his tone firm. polite. “i’d like to speak to my bride. alone.”

the response was immediate - hurried explanations, men too eager to please him in hopes he would remember their loyalty. “upstairs, first room!”

jungkook didn’t hesitate. he turned around, and ascended the staircase with ease, a controlled speed that made each step creak. he reached your door, pale and large, and pushed it open without bothering to knock, dark eyes noticing the warm lighting that illuminated your space.

the click of it behind him startled you, as it caused a sense of finality, causing you to look up with a soft gasp that had his shoulders rolling.

he filled the room.

his gaze dropped down to you - curled on your bed, cheeks pink, lashes fluttering, dress hiked up just enough to reveal the sweet bow on your panties. there was something dark across his face, his jaw tightened whilst his eyes traced you slowly. possessively.

he stepped closer to you.

you shrank back instinctively, fingers curling into the sheets, heart racing as he looked over you. too close, too solid, too real. he smelled like smoke and leather, something sharp to his expression that secretly did everything other than scaring you. it was intoxicating.

his hand reached out. not gentle.

firm as it closed around your thigh, thumb pressing into soft skin as he pulled you toward him without effort. your breath stuttered, body yielding automatically as he sat and drew you onto his lap, positioning you like you belonged there.

he looked towards the other side of your bed, hand reaching out to grab one of the cute plushies that were lined delicately in a row. his too large hand took your sweet, pink bunny and placed it in your arms, your back pressed against his chest as his arms engulfed you entirely.

your legs were spread, indecently, your dress hiked up to your upper thigh giving him full view of the small wet patch sat in the centre of your panties. the cute bow on top felt like a gift to him, one he knew he’d roll over thinking about for years to come. his own legs and thighs accommodated your weight as though you were no more than a feather, as though this was natural, primal even.

you couldn’t breathe. your brain was whirling at a thousand miles per hour as you felt his fingers trace directly over the gentle cotton, soaked exactly where you wanted to be touched, but knew you shouldn’t. he wasn’t your husband yet. this wasn’t allowed. this went against every teaching, every harsh threat your parents had taught you in the name of purity. he wasn’t supposed to touch you until you had a ring on your finger and yet here he was, fingers beginning to rub gently against your clit without so much as introducing himself to you.

slow. idle. possessive. he rubbed like a man who had all of the time in the world, as though the conversation downstairs hadn’t quietened down in hopes of hearing whatever you were both talking about upstairs. jungkook wasn’t much for words. he had a mere purpose.

your hips lifted without even realising, and you froze for a moment once you noticed what you were doing. you couldn’t stop yourself from doing it again, smaller this time, tentative. as though you were testing the waters to see if you were allowed.

his chest rose behind you. a quiet, pleased sound left him, one that had your eyelashes fluttering for a moment, unaware how deeply he was staring at you.

you buried your face into your sweet bunny, fingers curling into its ears as the pressure on your clit grew deeper and deeper, the pads of his fingers rough, friction from both his touch and the cotton of your panties only adding to the feeling growing in your stomach. no one had ever touched you like this, never even looked at you.

his other hand slid slower, fingers continuing to tease your upper thighs until he found himself pushing the soaked material to a side, grunting lightly at the sight of you. his wife’s pussy. made to be ruined by him.

your chest was heaving now, quiet puffs of air leaving your body as you clung to one of his arms, cheeks redder than they’d ever felt. he leaned down; nuzzling his nose into your cheek as he rubbed your entrance, teasing the tip of his fingers as though this was more pleasurable for him than for you.

“that’s it.” your eyes shut at the sound of his voice, finally. so deep. his finger pushed inside of you just as the thrill of his tone hit your spine, causing you to whimper quietly, already feeling fuller than anything you’d ever attempted. “feel that?”

you peered up, finally meeting his gaze, a glazed over shift in your eyes as your lips parted. puffs of air were leaving you, whilst you nuzzled into your teddy, his finger thrusting in and out and thumb circling your clit. he nudged your nose against his, sickeningly sweet, as though he wasn’t fucking you with the same hands that had killed others.

it was then, he added another finger, causing you to let out a louder whine, to which he grunted, feeling his own cock poke at you from underneath, hardening from the way you clenched so tightly around his digits. he watched your eyes close, head lolling against his shoulder whilst you buried your face into your bunny, a sight cuter than words. his innocent slut.

his fingers were mean, and the way he nudged your nose was even meaner, causing you to reopen your eyes, forcing you to stare at him.

“do you touch yourself?” he whispered down at you, voice so heavy you could feel it in your stomach.

the words sank into you like a bruise, his fingers halting; though they remained deep inside of you. you whined a little, hips lifting, the feeling of fullness aching you from the inside in. you tried to look away, but he followed your gaze, almost meanly. you were forced to look at him as he stared at you, waiting for your answer.

you couldn’t run away. couldn’t hide. and so you nodded, so faintly, only once, blinking in slight fear at his reaction. you weren’t supposed to, you knew that, had it drilled in your head that you were supposed to stay pure, even from your own thoughts and yet the only thing that was bearable in your life was the fingers that would find their way over your clit every night. you weren’t even allowed to have him touch you right now, and yet here you were, moaning up at a man you had feared up until now.

“yes?” he repeated, an almost hiss that had you cowering slightly, thighs beginning to close.

your face burned. your lashes fluttering away whilst you nodded, nibbling at your bottom lip. “i-i know..i’m not supposed to..i’m sorr-”

you were cut off immediately by a drop of his face, his nose tilting yours before he pressed his lips against yours.

his lips were moving against yours hungrily, and you struggled to keep up. this was your first kiss, and he could feel it, could taste it in the way you were gasping, your tongue lapping against his in a bid to reciprocate his skill. he could feel his brain twisting painfully at the thought of you, surrounded by the sweetness of your room, hand over your mouth, toying with yourself and bringing yourself to heights with closed eyes. fuck. it killed him.

you pulled away, struggling to breathe, eyebrows furrowed whilst looking at him, completely taken aback by his response. he was panting too, and he looked like he was in pain, only for him to drop down and kiss you once more, whilst resuming his merciless attack on you.

his two fingers were touching that spot inside of you, something you’d never been able to reach with your much smaller fingers and it was driving you insane, moaning into his mouth, hands still clutching your bunny as though your life depended on it.

“fuck.” he whispered once he pulled away, forehead pressing against yours. “want you to keep touching this pussy for me, hm? every day, every night. want you to remember how deep my fingers feel inside of you, how i’m stretching you out, how good it feels. and when i have you, and you’re all dressed in white, i’ll make you feel even better on my cock, you hear me?”

your eyes were wide as you stared up at him, his pace too rough for your poor virgin pussy, but a warped part of you yearned for more as your toes curled, panting, crumbling, whimpering. with a final whine, your body arched into his as your orgasm ripped through you at the mere thought of being split open on his cock, feeling something impossibly bigger deep inside your stomach, knowing in only a few days that very concept would become a reality.

jungkook fucked you through it, fingers not letting up until you began to shake, and only then did he slowly pull out, once you were whimpering into your bunny.

the sudden loss had you letting out a small noise of despair, one that had him hissing slowly as he watched your much smaller hands cup his own. he tilted his head towards you, his free hand grabbing your chin, so you could watch as he inserted his fingers into his own mouth.

jungkook let out a small moan himself, eyes shutting tightly at the taste of what was soon to be his, and for once, the man held himself back from what he wanted most. you.

you were panting as he straightened his back, your big eyes peering up at him, too shy given the fact he had just kissed you, and made you cum on his fingers before ever even conversing with you properly. your legs were like jello as he stood up, picking you up with him, suddenly up in the air which had your arms tightening around his neck, your bunny falling to the ground.

he pressed another sweet kiss to your lips, to which you responded, trying to keep up once more, despite the fact this one was much slower, much quieter, without the charged energy despite the fat, hard bulge visible in his trousers. he laid you on your bed properly, your hair sprawled around you and your now crinkled dress still pushed up.

“i’ll see you soon, baby. just a few more days, then you’ll be my bride.”

with a single kiss to your head, you watched your soon to be husband walk out of your room, your bunny in hand, and your panties in the other.

—

the morning of your wedding does not begin with congratulations.

it began with silence.

the servants moved carefully around you as you slept in a home that did not belong to you. you had travelled to jungkook’s city, the journey taking hours and now you were in a hotel room where the bed, although lavish, felt empty. cold. you weren’t surrounded by the familiarity of your typical warmth, and it did nothing to lessen your nerves.

no one around you met your eye. no one wished you well. they dressed you due to duty, not because they wanted to.

your mother was the last to enter.

her eyes swept over you critically, lips tugged into her typical usual frown as she sharply assessed you, as though you weren’t her daughter, but a mere investment finally ready to be unveiled. her fingers reached out without warning, pinching the material at your waist harshly.

“this is too loose.” she said coolly. “tighten it.”

the seamstress looked up from her crouched position, hesitating with furrowed brows. any tighter and it would hurt you.

your mother noticed her uncertainty, gaze snapping to her. “did i ask you to think?”

the woman murmured a rushed apology before obeying, pulling until the corset began to bite at your ribs. your breath caught, shallow and painful, but you refused to complain. you were taught long ago that discomfort was hardly something worth acknowledging.

she stepped back once you were fully adorned in white, unable to properly breathe, arms folded.

“you look acceptable.” she says at last. no mentions of your beauty or radiance, merely acceptable. “remember your place today.”

you nodded. you always nodded.

your father arrived then, already dressed, already impatient with how long it was taking to doll you up to perfection. he didn’t bother greeting you, his attention fixated on his expensive cufflinks as he adjusted them in the mirror.

“do not embarrass us.” he said flatly. “no crying. do not hesitate. don’t forget that this union is the only reason you were kept.”

the words landed with practised precision, hitting you right where it hurt most.

you lowered your gaze with another nod, fingers curling into the material of your dress.

he finally looked at you then. not in pride, or awe, but with warning.

“you’re fortunate.” he continued. “men like him do not take damaged things lightly. if you fail, there will be no coming back.”

as if you ever could.

your mother stepped forward to adjust your veil over your face, sheer lace barely hiding your features as it draped over your body sweetly. you looked like a vision, more beautiful than anyone could ever anticipate and how intrigued they were to see jungkook’s bride, the sole woman that had him ready to marry.

“smile,” she murmured under her breath. “you’re about to become very expensive property.”

property.

the word echoed around in your head, even as you stood in front of the double doors you were about to walk through, your father gripping your arm much too harshly to be deemed normal, whilst your bouquet sat comfortably in your free hand.

you could hear him before you could see him. not his voice, but the mere reaction to him.

the murmur inside the venue dulled, like sound being swallowed whole. chairs shifted, men straightening instinctively, shoulders squaring, heads turning towards the alter not in curiosity, but recognition. fear. respect.

your fathers grip tightened on your arm. too tight.

a warning disguised as support.

the doors ahead of you loomed, tall and carved, polished to a shine that reflected a distorted version of yourself - white and trembling, veiled and small. your heart beat so loudly you were sure it could be heard over the music in the room, each thud crawling up your throat and settling behind your eyes in a gentle sting.

the doors opened.

light flooded in, blinding you for a moment, but all you could see, all you could focus and notice was him.

jeon jungkook stood at the altar like owned the very ground beneath it.

black suit, cut sharp and severe, tailored to perfection. fabric clung to his body in a way that looked like it had been built for violence. his shoulders sat so broad, so wide, so tall - he was everything, with his hands loosely folded in front of him. he commended the very audience, and they watched as you began ascending in obvious awe.

the moment he saw you, something changed. something that sat far enough from subtlety that it caught your attention immediately.

his gaze locked onto yours with frightening immediacy, dark and unblinking, stripping the room of everyone else. you remembered the last time you saw him as a pang of pure want hit you deep in your stomach, rendering you breathless for a moment as you walked towards him in practised perfection, all whilst he did the same, his jaw tightening visibly.

his eyes were dragging up and down slowly. he was the epitome of hunger.

your steps almost faltered for a moment, only to have your father dig his fingers deep into your arm, an action that was caught by your betrothed almost immediately.

each step felt unreal, like moving through water. your dress flowed around you, white silk and lace trailing behind whilst the fabric whispered against the floor like it was telling secrets. the veil softened the world but it did nothing, nothing at all, to dull him.

it made him sharper.

he watched you like a predator watched something special precious. your bouquet trembled faintly in your grasp.

your parents had done their job well - your chin was lifted enough, shoulders relaxed but not loose, expression calm, serene, perfect.

a bride carved by cruelty - seen by her groom.

you reached the alter, your father releasing you almost too abruptly and it caught the eyes of those around you as your cheeks flamed in shame. jungkook stepped forward almost immediately, gaze severe as he pointed it towards your family whilst taking a hold of your hand, too soft to be anything deemed to be from him.

his thumb was over your pulse as you guided you to the middle of the alter, positioning you beside him, too large back covering you slightly from the piercing eyes of the people around you. it was his first act of protection, and immediately, you melted in his touch, seeing it. recognising it for what it was.

you were no longer a product on display. jungkook was openly claiming you.

it was the only thing churning in your brain as the officiant spoke, going through ancient vows that were imperative to your mob culture, carved through loyalty and expectation. your eyes were flickering to his broad chest, his jaw, his face, your interlocked hands. you were nervous, it was clear, but you weren’t afraid - something you could have never expected.

you spoke after he did, doing everything exactly as you were supposed to, and you knew the important people in the room were pleased with the sight of you. you truly were worthy of the man beside you.

and soon enough, you were turned to fully face him as your hands interlocked properly. for a moment, you let out a soft breath. he reached for your veil, lifting it, his eyes searching your face fully for the first time that day.

you looked up at him. wide eyed, flushed, obedient. his own breath caught, a rarity for him.

his hand cupped your jaw, tilting your face up as if it were the most natural thing in the world, before pressing his lips to your own. the kiss was hardly gentle, and not soft at all - it was an open claim for everyone there to see clearly. the control, the deliberate harshness was a message that delivered clearly.

you were his. under his protection. his wife.

the room erupted.

applause and cheers - approval was chanted loudly as it echoed around the hall, everyone stood on their feet to display their loyalty to jungkook, and show respect to you as you were now an extension of him. you were no longer y/n y/ln. you were now a jeon.

you barely registered it, too busy revelling in the way his hand pulled up your own to his lips once he had pulled away, turning to face the crowd alongside you. he dipped his head, whispering something in your ear only for you to hear it.

“my wife now.”

later, your reception boomed with noise, ranging from glasses clinking to loud cheers. a true mafia wedding; with some of the richest, powerful men in the entire world celebrating the wedding of the century. you sat beside jungkook, having taken your seat only a few seconds before whilst he leaned back, his gun openly on the table, eyes dark, lips parted as he looked around.

your hands were shuffled in your lap, as you watched with a glass filled with champagne that you left untouched. you were told it wasn’t womanly to drink on your wedding, despite knowing it would ease the heaviness in your stomach, and so you stayed away. it was what you did best.

jungkook’s hand sat heavy on your thigh, claiming, whilst he openly watched everyone celebrate you both, though he remained quiet. not laughing, stoic even, and your heart banged. did he have regrets? he was the most powerfully man in the room and yet even he was bound by honour; you knew he couldn’t divorce you so soon, but you really didn’t have anywhere to go if he decided he didn’t want you. maybe your dress wasn’t to his liking, or the incident in your room a few days ago had painted a different picture in his head of you?

“deep in thought on your wedding day.” he murmured quietly, suddenly leaning into your space, causing your doe eyes to widen further as you peered up at him. “s-sorry.”

he simply observed you, holding your gaze. “what are you thinking about?”

you nibbled on your lip immediately. you couldn’t lie to him, but there was no way you could tell him all of your insecurities, on your wedding day no doubt. it would send a man like him running. “my dress is tight.” you quietly lied, though it tasted poor on your tongue.

he leaned back slightly, jaw tightening as his eyes wandered over you. “didn’t take you for someone who lied, y/n.”

your gaze snapped back to him as you opened your mouth, and shut it immediately, feeling uncomfortable suddenly. he was displeased with you..you had already messed it up, and you were only an hour into your marriage.

little to your knowledge, jungkook could read you like an open book. you were pristine, polished to perfection, but he could see cracks. could see the way your fingers clutched your dress, mere millimetres away from his own hand, itching to be comforted, desperate for the gnawing anxiety to go away. he had an odd sort of attachment for you, something he had never seen coming and yet one sight of you in your bed had changed him for life.

he’d never ever let you fucking feel small again.

he noticed the gulp in your throat, and slowly lifted his hand from your thigh until they took a hold of one of your hands, squeezing it softly. “i’m playing with you, y/n.” he quietly murmured. “no one is watching us. you can relax.”

you met his eyes, and for a moment, you let him see. let him see the turmoil of emotion behind your eyes, the way you nibbled on your lip and the way your fingers shyly curled around his own as though it was both foreign and uncertain. were you allowed to? he was your husband after all.

“is this okay?” you whispered up at him so sweetly, voice so quiet he had to strain to hear you.

big, mafia boss jungkook sat there staring at you, heart beating so wildly in his chest it took everything in him not to pounce on you then and there.

“more than okay.” he assured for a moment, causing you to give him a shy smile, still unsure, but almost hopeful. your fingers curled even further into his, interlocking and cupping his hand whilst your flushed cheeks only turned more red.

your smile had undone him, but he felt unsettled at the prospect of you having to ask, especially considering his fingers had been inside you so deeply a mere 72 hours ago. a fucked up part of him liked it, liked the fear and curiosity mixture you exuded, it made him harder than anything he could conjure up. you were the sweet lamb locked up in a cage with the big bad wolf.

around you, men were laughing too loudly, glasses clinking as some voices carried throughout the reception. you couldn’t help but flinch, making eye contact with a few but hastily looking away, feeling uncomfortable as you immediately squeezed jungkook’s hands out of your mere subconscious.

he reacted immediately, eyes landing on the same man that dared to look at his wife, watching the way they recoiled, looking away immediately. he grabbed your chair suddenly, and dragged, making you yelp quietly as you grabbed onto him whilst you were manhandled closer to him. one arm slid over the back of your seat, and the other sat back in your hands, firmer this time.

“let them look.” his voice was rough. as though the thought boiled his blood. “they’ll do it anyway. but they won’t get a fucking taste of you.”

your eyes hooded at the implication of what he was saying, remembering the orgasm he had given you. how could you forget? you had spent the last 3 days trying to replicate it to no avail, spending hours with your own fingers inside you only to be left a sloppy mess.

your heart pounded. “..and you do?”

something flickered in his eyes with a slight twist at the end of his mouth. he met your gaze.

“i’ve been watching you for a long time now, y/n.” his voice was too calm for the admission he had given you. “had my eye on you, i’m a patient man when i need to be. need you to understand this very clearly when i tell you i chose you because you’re mine. you were supposed to be mine, and you are fucking mine.” his tone grew rougher with each word, his thumb drawing deceptive circles into your hand. “understand?”

your chest was heaving, eyes beaming up at him as your brain began to melt. to know someone wanted you this much, to the point of watching you, observing, stalking. it was so fucked up, even you could admit that, but it didn’t lessen how badly you could feel the warmth in your body grow at the mere admission. you nodded along to his words, panting lightly as your body turned to him.

“you want me?” your eyebrows were furrowed, words foreign in your mouth, as though it was something you had never dared to ask anyone in your life for you already knew the answer. in this case, you couldn’t believe it.

he grabbed your hand firmer, grunting lightly. “you belong to me.” he reiterated, taking your hand and lifting it to his lips, pressing sinful kisses to your knuckles.

hours passed as you sat there, and you both conversed lightly, though it was minimal as men came up to him, often talking business whilst you ate silently, watching people, avoiding the gaze of your parents who were quietly seething at the way you were taking sips of your drink and nibbling on food, everything they told you not to do. but you weren’t theirs anymore, were you?

jungkook stayed seated the way he always did - spine straight, shoulders squared, presence immovable. his hand remained wrapped around yours, steady, grounding, as though he’d decided this was where it belonged and saw no reason to move it.

you were deep in thought, and the intrigue in his chest was beginning to muddle his brain. he was a man that prided himself on how composed he was and yet you were ruining him completely, in front of multiple men that would take the chance to take him down if they could. they couldn’t, of course.

“what’s on your mind?”

your head tilted, blinking. “hm?”

his eyes flickered to yours, your faces much too close. his gaze was dark and unreadable. “it’s just us.”

just us, your brain chanted.

you hesitated, visibly. his gaze was direct, almost intrusive, and it had you opening your mouth before you could even think.

“you’re a..bad man.” you whispered.

the words landed between you.

you had been watching him converse and interact for the past few hours and it was settling deep inside your stomach, scaring you, intriguing you, making you curious. it was everything you’d been forced to look away from, hearing it from the confinements of your room as your father bellowed downstairs. women weren’t allowed to be privy to it in your life, and yet jungkook was here, newly married, sharing it with his bride.

jungkook didn’t react the way you expected - didn’t stiffen, bristle. he merely leaned back into his seat, still touching you.

he exhaled as he tilted his head at you. “yes. i am.”

your lashes fluttered. you hadn’t expected him to agree so easily.

he turned further into you, your knees touching. “does that scare you?”

you shook your head before you could overthink it. a tiny, almost imperceptible movement but he caught it. always did.

“no..” you admitted softly

his gaze sharpened. not unkind, curious. amused even. “why not?”

your fingers tightened in his, betraying your feelings. “i don’t know..” you whispered, looking down at your hands “i just..feel like-“ your words were trailing, embarrassed suddenly by your own boldness.

“say it.” he commanded.

you took a breath, still look in downwards. “feel like..you wouldn’t..be bad to me.”

something dark and satisfied flickered behind his eyes, his chest inflating slightly. he leaned in, voice dropping even lower. “do you like that i’m fucked up?”

your breath caught, heat fluttering up to your cheeks so fast it made you dizzy. you didn’t answer - couldn’t bring yourself to. the way your fingers tightened into his grip said enough.

jungkook watched you for a long time before speaking.

“i’m not a good man. i kill, i’ve got blood on my hands and i’m not going to stop. this is how this works, and you won’t get a say in that.” he watched the way you nodded, though he couldn’t help but notice the way your fingers were tracing his palm, as though his words had a completely different effect than he anticipated. “but i’ll come to you every night. that’s my promise to you, alright? i come home clean.”

“promise?” you surprised yourself with your boldness, despite your shyness.

he nodded in response, grunting lightly at the way you seemed so flushed.

“promise.”

—

your wedding had come to a close, and you were finally sat in the backseat of your private valeted car, alongside your now husband, hands touching. your heart was beating out of your chest, a new norm it seemed, as jungkook’s eyes ran up and down you like a man in heat.

a twisted part of your brain couldn’t wait. you felt excited, anticipated what he would do to you, how he’d do it, as though you weren’t about to be locked into a room with a big, bad, wolf - an apex predator known for little mercy. you were his wife, though, and one thing he had made clear in the little time you had spent in his presence was how much he enjoyed the concept.

and so, his hand sat on your thigh, cupping it through your heavy dress, veil still attached to your head as you shyly played with his fingers, the perfect vision of a coy bride. he had been hard all night, and frankly, for the past few days. seeing you today, a physical and external claim to the world that you belonged to him and him alone, god. it ruined him.

the car pulled up to a large home, larger than anything you’d ever seen and you too had come from wealth. you knew jungkook was in a different ballpark entirely, but the small gasp that left you as you looked out of the window pleased him greatly. he felt smug knowing he could lavish you.

“this is where you live?” you asked him in a quiet, awed tone, facing him with large eyes.

he watched you instead of the view he had grown too accustomed to, taking in the way you were in shock at your surroundings. he liked the contained excitement emitting from you, he couldn’t wait to see it further.

“for now.” he merely replied.

your brows knitted. “for now?” you repeated.

his thumb pressed into your thigh momentarily, slow and deliberate. “you’ll decide whether it feels like home.”

your heart kicked harder at his choice of words, a shy smile slowly forming on your face as you both shared eye contact for a second or two. for the first time in the short period you’d met him, the side of his mouth lifted slightly, matching you in your amusement.

soon, he was leading you inside, hand folded into your own as he lead you through room to room, pleasure gripping his chest at the sight of you so giddy, in awe of each and every thing that belonged to him.

jungkook was hardly someone who had experienced much outside of his work, and though he had an extravagant house, he had no time to spend in it. he’d come home to empty rooms, and eat dinner quietly after his housemaids had left, with only his security outside heard. it was lonely. silent. a curse well fitted to a man of his immoral standing.

but seeing you, still in your wedding dress, squealing over the size of the bath, or gasping loudly at the range of kitchen appliances he had truly never used a day in his life - it brought him a sense of intrigue, comfort. like you were the one thing that had been missing all along.

“i’ve never been to a place like this before.” you admitted, still shy at the prospect of being so honest to him despite knowing you weren’t supposed to be so open to him. your mother would be screaming if she knew.

“i know.” his gaze softened a little, feeling the way you were struggling to word it to him. “and..we really get to live here?” you asked once more, eyes too doe-like to be anything but innocent, causing him to internally hiss.

he was leading you upstairs as you spoke, dark eyes capturing you over his shoulder. “everything here belongs to you. this is yours now.”

you wish you weren’t so giddy, but the prospect of it all was just so exciting. despite your naivety, and the real fear that you truly didn’t know your husband whatsoever - he could be a cruel husband to you and you’d have to endure it in the name of your community but..deep down, you knew that wouldn’t be the case. he held you differently, touched you, looked at you.

“this is our room.” he turned to you as he opened the double set of doors to reveal your new living space.

you followed a step behind him, the sound of your high heels almost too loud on the delicate floor, and you could feel his eyes watching over ever inch of you. it exhilarated you. made you feel things you knew you weren’t supposed to.

your new bedroom was anything but warm. black sheets, dark walls - everything was cleaned to perfection. the bedding had been steamed, prepared delicately for the both of you, whilst the room itself had been stripped of anything to give it any sense of personality. it was a wild juxtaposition to your room, where you had creams, pinks, trinkets and books.

the only thing that had you letting out a soft gasp, was the sight of your sweet bunny, sat perfectly against one of the pillows.

you immediately began walking over to it, almost excited to see a taste of the only home you’d ever known well within reach, just as he closed the doors behind him. a sense of finality. for the first time, it was just you and jungkook and that was a scary thought - being in a room with a bad man who had no qualms for human life was a terrifying thought, but to be wanted so primarily by him? that was electrifying.

he loosened his tie as he watched you sit cutely on the side of the bed, holding the plush you. he tugged it free and pulled it off, before moving to his cuff links. every movement was deliberate, intentional, and by the time you were looking up at him, he too looked down at you with a hooded expression.

“come here.” he commanded.

you did exactly that, without even thinking, only to be turned around. your back was gently brushing against his chest as he breathed in your scent, watching the way your chest rose and fell, as though he was about to break you in half. it was his very intention.

rough hands grabbed your veil, lifting it out of your hair, before grabbing the ribbon of your corset in the back. he was a patient man for most things, but for you? he grabbed the pocket knife he kept in the console table beside him, cutting through each strand with a harshness that had you bristling, your dress becoming loose almost immediately.

he watched as it began to slide off of your body, leaving you in no more than the pretty white set you adorned solely for him. you were nibbling on your lip, still extremely nervous though the wet patch growing in between your legs, soiling your panties, was a big enough indicator of what you really wanted.

he turned you around once more, openly checking you out. from the way your tits had been pushed up by your bra, or the tiny panties he knew he’d keep for himself the second you took them off. he already had plans of taking them with him to work so he could fuck his fist to the memory of tonight, and it was doing nothing to calm the raging boner that was poking against his slacks.

“i don’t plan on being gentle with you.” he said.

your eyes flick to his, watching the way he took your own hands and lifted them so they were touching his chest, giving you agency to touch him, wanting you to feel comfortable in doing so.

his own hands slid over to your waist, pulling you in impossibly closer, so you were looking up at him with a bent head whilst he bent down to look at you, both equally as intrigued. a dangerous mix.

“i can’t give you softness. if that’s what you want, you need to tell me now.” his voice was quiet.

your throat tightened, fingers digging into his chest just to feel his skin. “that’s okay.”

he stilled.

silence. then - a breath, as though he was recalibrating, figuring you out.

“yeah?” his murmurs were soft. “you sure about that?”

you nodded, shy, small. certain. “I don’t think i’d like you gentle.”

to that, jungkook’s lips lifted slightly, in a tense snarl as suddenly, he pushed you back until you were dropping onto your bed, a small noise of surprise leaving you. your body bounced, whilst he climbed on top of you, pinning your hands above his head and grunting.

before you could even respond, his lips met yours, drowning out any noises or surprise whilst he pressed his body against yours so you could feel the hardness of his body. your fingers curled against his one hand, his strength barely on display and yet it had you whimpering at the feel of him so easily dominating you without even trying. the sight had your thighs visibly pressing together.

the kiss was harsh. mean, even, and it resembled that of the one in your bedroom only a few nights ago. he had made you cum without even introducing himself to you, letting your first impression of him being cruel fingers inside of you, curling and making sure your poor pussy would remember every inch as though it was the mere beginning for what was to come. now feeling his hard boner against his slacks, you knew that sentiment to be true.

his tongue was exploring your mouth, and despite being inexperienced, you were trying your hardest to keep up. you felt good, so much better than what you anticipated and he had barely started. everyone around you had been telling you how cruel the wedding night was - always the man fucking his new bride with no care to her pleasure, and yet here jungkook was, equally as cruel and yet basking in the pretty moans you were letting out.

once he pulled away, a string of saliva separated the two of you, the sight making you shudder as you looked up at him. he was on top of you, removing his suit jacket, unbuttoning his shirt whilst you watched, shivering from anticipation.

scars littered all over his chest, arms and shoulders. some deep, others faint, as though time had healed them into obscurity whilst thick tattoos also covered the majority of his right arm. you’d seen glimpses of them on his hand but you had no idea how high they went, spanning across half of his chest and shoulder. he watched you gulp, fingers faintly going over a particular scar on his stomach with furrowed eyebrows.

despite being deeply immoral, mobs had a clear code of conduct. that meant the women and children of these crime families weren’t used as pawns, nor were they made privy to the heinous things their husbands, brothers and sons would do in the name of work. you had been oblivious to the true nature of it all of your life, despite getting abused openly by your parents. the sight of jungkook in front of you scared you more than anything else you’d been subject to - the scars you were openly looking at were no doubt a result of punishments, or being caught.

you knew he was powerful, the only name that mattered, and yet seeing it had your eyes widening.

he was now all yours.

one hand shot down to grab your bra, removing it off of you in expert skill as though he had practised this very motion in his mind over and over, leaving you half exposed.

soon, your positions had changed, with him sat, back to the frame of the bed with you laid in his arms, panties slid to the side, and his fingers pumping deep inside of you. this was a mirror to what you had experienced when he had forced himself into your presence in the safety of your room, forever tainting the last bit of innocence you had left.

“did you do what i asked you to do?” he hissed down at you, as he fucked you with his two fingers, watching the way your pussy sucked them in hungrily, despite them feeling too much for you in that moment.

his other hand was around your neck, tightening just slightly, whilst two of his fingers pushed into your mouth, forcing you to suck, rendering you utterly helpless.

you nodded, through a small whine and sniffle, thighs shaking as he grunted in approval. “yeah..” you sucked harder, the feel of him heavy on your tongue whilst taking your breath away almost too much for you to handle.

the thought of you in your bed, fingering yourself with your too small hands, moaning quietly in hopes of not being caught simply because your soon to be husband had asked you to was fuel for him to pump harder. knowing you were constantly wet and thinking of him, pushing your fingers in even when it felt like too much - fuck. you would be the death of him.

“such a good girl, aren’t you? did it feel good?” he was grunting against you, now only in his boxers that were straining harshly against his cock, but he paid it no mind. he wanted to ruin you first.

you nodded, shy, ashamed. it went against everything you’d ever been taught.

“b-but..didn’t..couldn’t cum..” you managed to choke out, big teary eyes staring up at him, whilst he abused your poor virgin pussy, desperate to be stretched even further. “fuck, needed me didn’t you?” your admission had his eyes closing, a rare sight of jungkook being made undone. “you liked being fingered by me, y/n?”

you nodded, lip beginning to quiver at his choice of words. so dirty. so fucked.

“filthy fucking girl.” he hissed once more, though he was pleased beyond words. “you were made to be ruined, weren’t you? cumming like that on my fingers. i’m a stranger to you, never even met me and you’re here leaking on me, begging me to break you.”

your chest heaved, as you felt your orgasm impending. you could feel it growing, and it felt like an ache you had tried to get rid of for days, finally ready to disappear. you sucked on his fingers whilst his others tightened around your neck further, practically cutting off your breathing bar a few puffs, watching the way your back arched deeper into him. you looked so sweet, so gentle. he fucking loved it.

it was when he dipped his head down, nose brushing against yours as though you weren’t a slobbery mess, both inbetween your legs and around his fingers, eyes dark. “you wanna be my good girl? want me to be pleased with you, baby?”

you nodded quickly, yearning for his approval, desperate for it. you’d do anything to have it, and he knew it - had his cock ready to burst.

his fingers quickened, before he released his fingers from your mouth, instead properly tightening around your neck. “then cum for me.”

and so you did.

your vision went white as you struggled to breathe, your orgasm exploding inside of your body, back arching off of the bed. his fingers didn’t slow down, keeping up the brutal pace whilst your body shook, unable to take a breath, forcing your lungs to work overtime to compute the rippling orgasm taking away your air.

he pulled away from your neck, watching you collapse back into his chest with broken breaths, desperate whines filling the room once his fingers left your pussy, only for him to suck on them immediately, groaning quietly over how good you tasted.

your eyes were closed, as he manhandled you, pushing you further up the bed. he stood, taking off his boxers, and the slap of his hard cock hitting your stomach was what echoed alongside your pants, causing you to look up immediately.

the first thing you did was whine at the mere sight. thick, long and fat. his tip looked angry, a deep shade of pink, with dribbling precum smearing all over his shaft as jungkook pumped it over you, causing your eyes to flutter. you struggled taking your own fingers, but knowing you were about to be practically impaled by him had you almost scrambling away.

“come here.” his voice was rough as you shakily turned to him, legs already jelly as you sat on them.

he dropped his cock onto your face, slapping your cheeks, your lips, nose. the juxtaposition of your sweet, innocent face whilst he smeared his precum all over your lips was delicious, and he wanted to forever remember you like this - his pretty whore. his wife.

the weight of his cock had your brain fizzling out, unable to compute anything in that moment other than the feel of him.

“want you like this every day.” he whispered suddenly, pulling your hair closer to his cock, making you open your mouth in surprise. he took that as his chance to insert the tip, letting it sit heavy in your mouth. “on your knees, mouth open. letting me use you. you’ll be good for me, won’t you?”

“mhm.” you hummed immediately, the thought causing another wave of wetness to appear between your legs. “wan’that.”

he hummed back, pleased with your answer. he wanted to fuck your throat, make you memorise the exact length of him down until you couldn’t breathe, until you were tapping his legs in desperation, crying all sloppy and wet. he’d save it for another time, almost hopeful that you’d misbehave soon so he’d get a chance to ruin you further. for now? he had every intention of fucking you.

“ass in the air.” he grunted down at you, before pressing a kiss to your lips, grounding you. “let me see your pussy.”

and so you did exactly what your husband asked of you. you sniffled a little, almost in anticipation as you leaned down, arching your back so your face was gently pressed against his pillow, revealing your already puffy core. it was begging for him, desperate to be touched, ruined, broken - whatever he had planned for you, anything he’d give you.

jungkook let out an uncharacteristic groan at the sight, huffing a little at the sight of you so ruined, before he positioned himself nicely. he rubbed his tip over your slick folds, watching the way you shuddered at the size of him, nervously nibbling on your lip.

he leaned over you then, causing you to still in confusion, only for him to shove something in your hands.

your pink bunny.

“hold it.” he wasn’t asking you, but rather making you.

he wanted you holding on to your last bit of innocence as he fucked it out of you. a cruel, cruel man indeed.

you grabbed it, just like he asked, nuzzling your face into it for comfort as he lined himself up to your hole, and began pushing in.

your eyes closed, loud gasps leaving you at the feel of being stretched. one inch, two inch, three, four. it felt like it was going on forever until he had his entire cock inside of you, causing you to shake, whimper, and scratch at the sheets. he was too big, way too big for you to handle and yet here you were, stretched impossibly around a cock that had bullied its way in regardless.

he grunted loudly as he dropped down, his chest now against your back, cupping your body. your face was pressed against your sweet bunny, tears beginning to leak from your eyes whilst he remained still, forcing you to adjust whilst also catching your gaze from above.

“feel that?” he whispered, shaking himself. “gonna make sure you feel like this everyday. such a tight, perfect pussy.”

it felt like a threat, one that had your legs shaking, making them completely give out as you dropped down onto the bed, causing him to thrust inside you.

you let out a loud whimper, his eyes rolling back at the sound before thrusting again. and again. and again. you were being fucked so meanly, whilst he whispered utter filth into your ear, kissing your cheeks, your head, your back - he bit against your shoulder whilst his deep thrusts hit the most intimate parts of you.

the pain remained, but the pleasure was growing immensely with each and every thrust. it was cruel how good it felt, how fucked up your brain was beginning to feel at the thought of such an evil man being the one to take your virginity, and before you could even comprehend what your body was doing, you were matching his thrusts. you knew he was holding back, you just didn’t want him to.

“faster.” you begged him with watery eyes and a soft sniffle, cheek curling into your bunny so sweetly he wanted to marry you all over again.

he let out a moan at your words, giving you exactly what you wanted.

his thrusts felt like a punishment in itself, one that had you moaning out his name, over and over and over. the sound of skin hitting skin was loud, his arms caging you in tight, making you take each thrust much to your secret delight.

“s’good.” you slurred into your teddy, eyes shutting tight. “want it..”

“yeah?” he was biting hard on your neck, leaving purple marks anywhere he could reach. “such a perfect girl. taking my cock like you were born for it, huh? you like your pussy being broken in?”

“like it so much.” you tearily moaned back, salty beads beginning to leak down your face quicker than you’d anticipated, pleasure beginning to overcome any pain you had initially felt. “want it all the time.”

to that, he closed his eyes, breathing in the strawberry scent emitting from your hair, grunting loudly. “i’ll give you the fucking world, baby. anything you want, you hear me? swear, i’ll make you feel so good, never let you wake up without a pussy full of cum.”

your legs were shaking, orgasm already impending and he could feel it, could feel the way your pussy was tightening and clenching. he halted his thrusts, resulting in a loud, bratty whine from you as he pulled out, making him spank your ass hard.

he twisted you around, your teddy still in your arms before he pushed back in, so you were facing him in missionary. his head dropped to yours whilst your ass still stung, your arms wrapping around his neck almost immediately, craving him closer and closer and closer. you wanted him deport, wanted to feel him inside your very blood stream, overcome with a feeling of want.

“dreamt about you. used to go to bed at night hard thinking about all the ways i could make you cum.” he was growling in your ear. “knew i had to have you. didn’t fucking care if you didn’t want me back, you’re mine anyway, you understand me? you’re mine, y/n, and i’ll put a bullet in anyone’s head who thinks otherwise.”

your teary eyes looked up at him as you let out a small sob, his thrusts growing harder, faster, deeper. “promise?” you cried up at him, the feeling of being wanted running so deeply through your veins, healing the single part of you that made you cry each night.

it was all you’d ever wanted. you just wanted someone to look at you, choose you and be happy. you were deprived of it for so long, not knowing what it felt like to be the cause of someone’s need or want, only to have your husband hovering over you, cock deep inside your fucking stomach as he professed his primitive need for you.

“promise, sweet girl.” he assured, capturing your wobbly lips in another brief kiss before pressing his head to yours, looking down at your teddy. “good girl. keep holding your bunny, baby.”

his girl was such a good listener, as you nodded through your sobs, nuzzling your face so sweetly into it as though you weren’t being pounded into, your virginity stolen away by a man that had no intention of being gentle with you during your first time.

you could feel the familiar feeling in your stomach, causing your legs to wrap around jungkook’s waist, feet digging into his back, almost begging him to be harsher with you. you were just as fucked up as he was, begging for the pain since it made the pleasure so much better.

“you wanna cum, baby?” he condescendingly asked, voice mocking you as you nodded up at him anyway, letting out a loud sob. “yeah? want me to fill up your pussy too? make it nice and milky?”

“please please please..” you chanted, tits bouncing with each thrust much to his enjoyment.

before either of you could think, your second orgasm rushed through you harsher than your first, rendering you utterly speechless. whilst your vision had gone white with the first, this time, it had gone black - causing you to drop into an overwhelming sense of unconsciousness for a few seconds as it ripped through you entirely.

jungkook watched, the sight hotter than anything he’d ever seen before, causing his own balls to tighten, his orgasm impacting him immediately too.

“fuck, fuck, fuck..take it.” he was growling at you, pumping through his orgasm as he released his cum inside of you, fucking you both through your highs.

you felt even fuller than before, cum leaking out from either side of his cock as he plugged it all inside of you, causing you to shake desperately in his arms, whilst you cried still, much to his enjoyment.

by the time you were both coming down from your highs, your face was a blotchy mess, makeup completely ruined whilst his back, chest and shoulders were littered with new red marks that stung with each movement. he loved it. he slowly pulled out of you, watching the way his cum leaked out of you almost immediately, the sight intoxicating.

his fingers pushed it back in with haste, lifting your legs slightly to make sure it wouldn’t leak again, and the action had you whimpering. he wanted the cum to stick. wanted to get you round and plump, pregnant with his baby so he could keep you forever.

he knew he was a relatively cruel guy, but he sincerely had plans to be good to you. he pulled you into his arms immediately, holding you sweetly whilst kissing over your wet cheeks, pressing kisses to your lips, nuzzling your nose, stroking your hair. he whispered sweet nothings, telling you how proud he was, how good you were for him, each phrase causing you to whimper louder than the next.

his sweet wife. god, you were everything and more and you had no idea. he’d make sure you were to never see your family again, even if that meant wiping them out for what they had done to you - he had to work on removing the conditioning they had done to your brain, make sure you were happy. that you were safe, as free as you could be with a guy like him.

one look up at him, with your teary eyes and sniffling nose, as though he had the answers to each and every single thing in the world had him completely undone.

he’d give you everything and more.

—

the house felt too quiet. too still.

two months of marriage and the rhythm of life with him had settled into something closest to perfection. you were experiencing joy, happiness, love - to be loved and to provide it in ways you simply didn’t think you could ever see for yourself.

he came home each night at exactly 9pm, his strict punctuality something you had grown accustomed to. he’d leave a bouquet of flowers for you on the table, fresh and fragrant whilst he’d pick you up and kiss you senseless, feeling you melt in his arms. you’d eat together whilst you sat on his lap, chattering away about your sweet day that mainly consisted of tending to your garden and shopping with your security guards, always so excited to tell him about the new things you had bought him with his card.

you didn’t cook, didn’t clean - things you’d been trained in by your parents, a misogynistic reminder that you were worth nothing more than what you could offer your future husband and yet jungkook absolutely forbade it. he refused to have you spend your days doing something your house help could do instead.

instead, he had you spending your days in silk and satins, wandering large rooms that belonged to you now, sprawled on couches that were too big and decorating the luxurious house so it would feel like a home. every indulgence was a gift from him, a testament of his care for you, and though he was one who often kept his emotions to himself, even when they pertained to you, you could feel it deeper than any word he could express.

jungkook loved you.

it was in the way he moved, the way he’d catch you by the waist every time you walked past him, or the way he’d thrust into you to make you cum each morning. he had claimed you in body, soul and mind and you were happier than you’d ever been.

tonight was different.

the house felt silent. the clock had hit 3am no longer than 5 minutes ago, the glow from the tv being the only thing to illuminate your living room, whilst you anxiously bit down on your lip, chest beating and head swirling. you weren’t much of a drinker, but you had finished a glass of wine to calm your nerves only for them to heighten further once the clock ticked further.

he was late.

your stomach twisted again.

you knew that his line of work made him a target, all of the men in the profession were, but he was different. he was jeon jungkook, the most dangerous, the head apex - it terrified you to think he could potentially be somewhere bleeding out, shot, alone. you couldn’t bear the thought, a new wave of tears washing over you as you hid your mouth with your shaking hand.

you couldn’t get it out of your brain.

flashes of him in a pool of his own blood, gunshot wounds to the chest - your father had once detailed to some of his friends about a kill he had achieved in gruesome detail, unaware that you were just outside the room listening in. it had haunted you for months, and even now, years later, it sprang to life knowing what kind of cruelty existed in this world.

your padding feet had gone out to your personal security team, sweet men called seokjin and taehyung, desperate to know whether they’d heard anything, but they were just as clueless as you. they weren’t allowed to leave their posts until he arrived, and they had grown to care for you - you were so sweet, they liked protecting you.

it was taehyung who told you that they were on lockdown, that all of their phones had been asked to be turned off, that something was wrong and in case of trackers, they needed to be alert and safe. that made you cry into your hands as you retreated to your living room, holding a pillow to your chest.

that had been an hour and a half ago, your eyes shutting tightly at every wave of fear that rushed through you.

and then, suddenly..the sound of the lock.

your heart jumped into your throat.

the door burst open, hitting the wall with a loud thud that violently cracked the silence in the air, a heavy tension following through as jungkook walked into the room.

he didn’t enter like a husband coming home to comfort. he came in like a predator ripping back into his territory, wild eyes scanning, shoulders tense and body coiled like he was seconds away from snapping. his suit jacket was crooked and his once, pristine shirt that you had only bought him a mere week ago, showed large spots of darkness making your stomach drop.

blood. not a smear, not a little. enough. enough to know the night was violent.

the sight of him, his scent, the blood, iron, sweat - the danger. it all hit you at once.

your legs moved before your brain could compute what you were seeing, a loud and harsh sob raking through your body as you all but launched yourself into his arms, fingers digging deep around him, clutching him to your own smaller body.

the second he felt you, everything stopped.

his head jerked up, eyes dark and black, scanning, searching, computing what was happening in front of him as though you were a mere figment of his imagination and not a real person. the warmth on his body so sudden and confusing before he looked down and realised what was occurring.

he froze for a moment.

“why are you up?” his voice was low, dangerous, shaking through the room.

you couldn’t answer, your cries stealing your breath away as you clutched him tightly, your hands on his chest smearing with the blood that had soaked through his shirt, one that did not belong to him.

his eyes swept over you. you were trembling from evident fear, causing him to search your body, his hands rough as they grabbed you by your shoulders, pulling you away just so he could examine you, despite the shake in his own body.

“did someone touch you?” he demanded, eyes crazed. “did something happen?”

you managed to control your sobs, though the hiccups and desperate gasps for air were still charging through you. “n-no..” he let out a sigh of relief. “i-i didn’t..didn’t know where you..you were and..i thought..”

he cut you off immediately.

“shit went sideways.” he grunted, visibly still reeling from his anger. “shipment fuck up. some guy tried to double cross me, wrong city, wrong people. i handled it myself.”

her stomach dropped as she finally took in his appearance. the blood smeared all over him, and as a result, now her too.

“yourself?”

“this is our world. what did you expect?” his eyes narrowed, unable to think, comprehend. he could see you crying, but he couldn’t compute it, not after the night he’d had. “don’t look at me like that.”

your lip trembled still. “i thought you were dead..”

that snapped him out of it.

he grabbed you then, properly, both bloody hands cupping your face, harshly making sure you could meet his eyes with your own. “don’t ever say that.” he was growling, chest heaving. “don’t put that fucking shit in your head, y/n.”

you nodded through your sobs, clutching him tightly still. “i couldn’t stop it, you didn’t come home on time and it got so late, and no one knew what was happening. i thought someone got you..” your chest was heaving.

his thumbs were swiping your tears like he was mad at them personally, shushing you quietly.

“it’s not that easy. can’t get rid of me like that, baby, i’d never fucking leave you. you hear me?”

you nodded again, before he held you tight to his body, rocking you gently, breathing in your scent, his previous anger he couldn’t control now turning inwards, plaguing him from the inside. he couldn’t believe it.

he’d had one of the worst nights of his life, so many men had died over a single betrayal, and he rarely got his own hands dirty anymore - but seeing you? crying, chest heaving, shaking, desperate and afraid? that was the worst of all. his anger had blinded him so deeply that he hadn’t even recognised it at first, brain still whizzing from the adrenaline of before until he realised what was in front of him.

his precious little wife, crying for him.

“listen to me.” he pressed his forehead against yours once he lifted you up into the air, your legs wrapping around his waist. “i lost track of time. i fucked up, y/n. that’s on me, okay? but i’m here, and you need to remember that i come home. i always come home.”

your fingers were pulling at the back of his head, tangling in the strands of hair you loved to play with so much as you absorbed his words, your sobs slowly but surely calming down.

“i-i don’t..care what you do.” you confessed, sniffling through your hiccups. “but you promise you’ll come back?”

“i promise, baby. cross my heart, swear to you.” he assured immediately. “my pretty wife, look at you. fuck, no more crying, c’mon. i’m here.”

in the quiet aftermath of your sobs, he still stayed there. holding you up in his arms as you calmed down, holding him as though he was the most precious thing in the world - to you, he was. the blood had began to dry on him, fury still deep in his veins whilst he cherished the feel of your body like a mad man returning from war, you were so fragile. his one and only possession.

he didn’t put you down straight away.

his grip shifts, fingers digging deep into the hold of your ass as he made sure to ground himself. not gentle, but firm. careful. like he needed to feel you were safe, and real, and in his arms.

“fuck, y/n. you scared me.” he admitted, a tinge of vulnerability he had never shown you before tweaked in his voice.

“i scared you?” you pulled back, nose pink, eyelashes wet, heart wrecked.

his jaw tightened just looking at you, his heart clenching. fuck. you were such a liability, his one weakness and your place in his heart was growing day by day. he needed to amp up your security.

“you’re shaking.” a flat observation, but you knew his objective. he wasn’t talking to you, but to himself, and so, you rested your head on his shoulder, letting him hold you for as long as he needed in that moment, whilst you held him just as tightly.

he began walking down the hallway, to your bedroom’s bathroom, still clinging to you like a little baby as he turned on the shower. navigating the hallways of the home you now shared felt so much bigger, heavier even, given the situation - it was only a home when he was here with you.

he placed you on the counter as he began to undress you first, stripping you from your flimsy pyjama top and bottoms, revealing the bitten skin he had ravished just that morning. your breasts dropped from your tank, sweet pussy on display as he observed you. he began to undress too, desperate to rid himself of today.

“look at me.” he says.

you listened.

he studied your face as he unbuttoned his shirt, checking for any hidden cracks, for damage. for something that couldn’t be undone.

“did anyone come near you tonight?” he asked again, slower this time. controlled.

“no.”

“did anyone call you?”

“no.”

“touch you?”

“no..”

“you stayed inside?” his eyes were dark.

“yes.”

“good.”

he was shirtless now, ridding himself of his slacks, leaving him just as naked as you, cock half hard as it sprung to attention, charged immediately at your mere presence. the blood from earlier had stained into his skin, his chest and abs painted a deep red, hands still splattered.

the sight struck your heart, and you fought back a whimper as he once more grabbed you, taking you into the shower with him.

his hands began to move, once you were placed on your feet. over your waist, your stomach, your arms, your breasts, your back, your pussy, your ass. the water stained red as it washed everything away, whilst he explored you like he tended to do, though this was an amalgam of the events that had just transpired.

he was possessive in every single thing he did, forcing himself into your chest, making sure you could feel his presence deep inside your body even without him being there. he wanted you just as fucked up as he was, just as desperate, just as secretly ruined. he had no idea you already were.

his now clean hand dipped inbetween your legs, spreading them immediately as his fingers found home against your clit. you let out a soft sigh, easing against his arm in comfort as you felt the tension leave you in waves of pleasure.

“you don’t wait up like that,” he said, almost harshly, as he rubbed slow, soft circles into you. “you don’t sit here thinking yourself sick.”

“i couldn’t sleep.” your rebuttal came immediately, causing him to slap your ass in a mean spank, making you mewl, leaning into his other arm, feeling the way he kept you up with his rubbing fingers.

“i don’t care.” he leaned in, pushing you till your back was against the wall. “you sleep. you trust that i’ll walk through that door.”

your fingers curled over his bicep.

“i needed to know you were okay.” your admission came through closed eyes, as pleasure waves through you.

even in moments like this, jungkook couldn’t keep his hands to himself, the prospect of making you cum simply too high. considering he could still taste his earlier anger, he needed this. needed to have you break and mewl for him.

“i will be.” he nudged your nose, prompting you to look at him through hooded eyes. “i’ll always come back to you.”

the rest of the shower was spent with him teasing you, fingering your poor core until you came, despite still feeling stretched from your early morning session. the feeling of him so intimately against you was everything you needed in that moment, and both of you knew it - it was his way of telling you exactly how he felt.

and later, when you were on his chest, deep in the early morning, neither of you able to sleep as his cock sat hard inside of you, you both embraced. you kissed like you had both been promised to one another - you, the one constant in his life, untouched by the nightmare that was his reality, the brutality of his workforce and him, the protector you had longed for for years.

he pressed his hand against your stomach, feeling him inside of you before bringing you impossibly closer, nose brushing against your own.

“i love you, sweet girl.”

it was then you could finally breathe again.

—

my mafia jk is here, and isn’t he so filthy 😢 i love a dirty, cruel man and he truly is in all of the best ways. okay brb as i go change my panties

you snapped at him. "if you can't be on time, just tell me so i can take the damn train."

his eyes narrowed at you, brows furrowing. "i'm here, aren't i? i always come get you. i don't know why you're acting like i left you stranded."

"oh my God, jungkook. it's not just about that. i was out waiting in the cold like an idiot while you-"

"while i what? work my ass off all day too? fuck's sake, y/n, i'm not your chauffeur."

and yeah, that's what caused it. whatever negative feelings you've both been feeling in the week all surfaced. by the time he parked in the garage, your voices were raised and yelling at each other.

now in the elevator, the silence between you feels worse. you can feel him staring at the side of your face, and as much as you hate to admit it – it intimidates you. 

when the doors finally open, you storm out first. jungkook follows a step behind you with the house keys jingling in his hand. when you reach the door, you wait with your arms crossed refusing to turn around. he unlocks the door without a word, pushes it open and lets you walk in first. the second he locks the door; you turn around furiously to look at him.

"i actually don't think i'm done talking about this." you say while kicking off your uncomfortable work shoes. "you think just because you showed up eventually makes it okay? i'm exhausted, jungkook. i always am, and the one thing i expect from you is that you're there when you say you'll be."

he basically throws the keys onto the counter, the unnecessarily loud sound it makes emphasises his own anger. 

"and as i told you, i got held up at work. it isn't like i was out drinking with my friends. i was working. you know, that thing we both do to pay for the apartment you're currently yelling in for no good reason?"

you laugh bitterly, reaching behind to unzip your skirt, "oh, what the hell are you trying to say, huh? you think i don't work just as hard as you do? well i do, and i would never do something like this to you."

you pull your skirt down your legs until it pools at your feet. you step out of it, so you're left in just your blouse and underwear. jungkook's gaze wanders over your figure and his eyes darken. you see the way his tongue licks across his bottom lip, and it pisses you off more because he's clearly not interested in what you said since he's checking you out.

"why the hell are you looking at me like that?" the disapproval is clear in your voice.

he takes a step closer, shrugging off his jacket and carelessly letting it fall on the floor. "like what?"

"like you wanna fuck me instead of talking about this."

he huffs out a low laugh. "can't help it. you're sexy as hell when you're mad."

you roll your eyes and turn towards the bathroom to get away from him, unbuttoning your blouse as you go. he's right behind you, and when he catches up with you, you feel the hardest, most possessive smack on your ass. you gasp and spin around, hand flying to your ass cheek that now stings deliciously,

"jungkook!"

he doesn't even look sorry, he just stares down at you with dark, heavy eyes with a smirk on his face. "i can't even lie. i wanna fuck you," he says with genuine honesty in his deep voice. "been thinking about it since you started raising your voice in the car."

your face heats up at that, and your body traitorously feels aroused too, despite how angry you still are.

"no," you say firmly. "not happening until you apologise properly ."

he scoffs and runs a hand through his hair. "you want to apologise for something that isn't my fault, something i already apologised for anyways? fine. i'm really sorry y/n. now come here."

"that's not a proper apology, you're being cynical." you turn again, walking into the bedroom, opening the last buttons of your blouse. once it's fully unbuttoned, you take it off so you're left in your bra and panty. even though it's freezing cool, you purposely take ages so jungkook can see you like this and wish.

you hear his footsteps behind you again, and then his hands are on your hips, pulling you back against his chest before you can move away. he's warm and you feel his erection pressing against your ass. he dips his head down, so his lips brush your ear.

"i want to fuck you." he murmurs again needily. one of his hands slides up your stomach to graze the side of  your breast. "wanna bury myself inside you and make you forget why you're mad."

you shiver, hating how good that sounds, hating how much easily he gets you weak for him.

"no," you say, and it comes out embarrassingly weak. you turn in his arms and push at his hard chest. "not until you actually mean that you're sorry,"

his eyes search yours, frustration is evident in his eyes, but of course the hunger is more noticeable. he lets out a slow exhale, looks as if he's contemplating something, then he gives you a little smirk.

"okay," he says calmly. "let's make a deal, hmm?"

you narrow your eyes, growing suspicious. "what kind of deal?"

he steps back and starts unbuckling his belt. your throat goes dry as he opens a button before unzipping it.

"cock-warming. you sit on my dick," he says, eyes locked in yours. "just sit. no moving or anything. we stay like that until one of us can't take it anymore. whoever thrusts, grinds or anything too physical has to apologise. properly."

your breath hitches and you feel some wetness at your core at the thought of his filthy ultimatum and the challenge in his voice.

"you've lost it. why would i do something so demented?"

he pushes his jeans and boxers down his legs enough to free his cock. it's so hard and lengthy, it's got you mentally salivating. he holds it in his hand, giving himself a few strokes, and damn you're jealous that you're not the one doing it for him.

"scared you'll lose, baby?"

you swallow hard, you're stubborn but then again there's an ache between your thighs wishing to be satisfied. this is probably the dumbest deal you're about to agree to, but it does sound interesting in way you're unable to comprehend.

"fine." you say firmly.

"get on me then."

you stand there for a second, re-thinking your decision. where on earth does one even come up with this idea? jungkook walks back to sit on the edge of the bed. your eyes voluntarily drift down to his cock, hard against his stomach with the tip glistening. he carries on fisting himself while looking up at you with a little smirk. your pride is screaming at you to leave and not give him what he wants, but of course, the demon inside you is ovulating and very curious.

you huff out a breath and approach him, climbing on his thighs to straddle him. you're stubborn as ever, so you don't touch him more than you have to. your knees sink into the bed on either side of his thighs. once you're properly on him, he reaches out for your panties to help you get them off. his little touch is enough to have you aching for more of it, and that pisses you even more because you don't feel like being a sucker for him tonight.

"don't" you snap, slapping his hands away. "i don't want you looking at me, i don't want you touching me. let's just do this stupid thing."

his eyebrows shoot up, surprise and maybe a little bit shock evident on his face. "yes, ma'am." he murmurs.

he tilts his head back immediately, looking at the ceiling like it's the most fascinating thing to exist – which of course, it isn't. you are. you're undoubtedly the most fascinating thing jungkook could lay his eyes on. but now, he has to make believe that the ceiling is interesting since you're forbidden him from looking at you. his drops his hands on the mattress, fingers fisting into the sheets.

you sit up a little to get your panty off, and it sticks to your core, showing you how pathetically soaked you are already. you feel your arousal dripping down the inside of your thigh, landing on jungkook, just above his knee. his throat bobs hard and his jaw clenches tightly. he moves a bit so the tip of his cock brushes against your inner thigh leaving a small smear of pre-cum.

you glance down and he's painfully hard, his veins standing out today. your mouth goes dry. you're annoyed that your first instinct is to hold him in your hands and tease him before giving him the sloppiest head. instead, you sit back on his thighs, keeping some space between your core and his cock. his eyes are still glued to the ceiling, lips slightly parted as he breathes slowly, trying to remain neutral.

you slide one hand down your stomach, going down to your clit. jungkook quickly glances at what you're doing and his breath hitches when he sees your fingers rubbing yourself slowly. you're drenched enough that when you circle your clit, the sound is very audible to him. you let out a little moan as your fingers move through your folds, you're very sensitive so your touches feel so good. jungkook's hips involuntarily jerk and he lets out a low, frustrated groan.

"fuck," he whispers softly, squeezing his eyes shut.

you slip a finger into yourself, pumping inside slowly. the wet and filthy sounds fill the room, tormenting jungkook. you add another finger inside, imagining that it's him. though your fingers are absolutely nowhere near as pleasant as jungkook feels. he finally brings his head forward to watch you finger-fucking yourself. he makes a noise that makes you clench around your fingers. he drops his head back down on the mattress, letting out a shaky breath.

even though you're enjoying the pleasure you're giving yourself, you pull your wet fingers out and bring them up between you. without a word, you press them to his lips. he doesn't hesitate; he opens his mouth so you can insert your fingers inside for him to lick them with a satisfied groan. he licks them clean while finally staring into your eyes, sucking harder on your two digits.

when he finally lets your fingers go with a soft pop, he hoarsely speaks, "fucking hell, you're so soaked."

you don't answer him, you move forward, rising on your knees until you're hovering over him. he gets the hint and wraps a hand around his cock, holding it steady for you. you lower yourself onto him torturously slow, coating him with your arousal. he hisses, head falling back again. you finally sink down, and the stretch is perfect. your breath catches in your throat, and you moan out shakily as jungkook groans loudly.

"f-fuck," he breathes out. "so warm and perfect."

once you're all the way down, neither of you move for a while. he's buried so deep inside you, pulsing while you clench around him. your hands find his shoulders for balance, nails digging into his skin – it stings a little, but jungkook loves the feeling. his eyes are locked on your face now, gauging your reaction to this, taking note of the pleasure you're unable to hide, and the way you're clearly displeased with just sitting on him. you're his girl, he knows you through and through. you're always in the mood to fuck him or to get fucked by him, he knows very well that you're eager for some action. but of course, you're way more stubborn so you both end up sitting still, staring at each other.

the atmosphere between both of you is very tense. considering the fact that you're both still quite pissed off at each other. you're both still frozen in place, bodies intimately joined together but refusing to move. his cock throbs deep inside you and every time you clench around him, you both let out frustrated noises, putting much effort into staying still.

jungkook leans back on his elbows so he can get a good look at you. the movement causes his hips to move a bit, making his cock shift inside you, nudging a spot that has your toes curling. you whimper softly, nails digging harder into his shoulders. 

"don't move."

he grunts lowly. "trying not to, baby. fuck, this was a stupid fucking idea."

his eyes are dark and glassy, fixed on you in a way that makes you feel very intimidated. you can feel the way he's obviously holding back, see the way his abs flex and the way his thighs tense under you and the way he's trying to remain perfectly still. you lean forward, trying to steady yourself on him and the movement causes him to drag along in your walls.

"shit," he curses. "you're dripping down my balls, y/n. tell me the truth, does fighting with me get you this wet?"

he asks huskily with some teasing in his voice, and maybe even some triumph as if he's just found out something dirty about you. your cheeks burn, but you won't let him win that easily. you lean in close, lips brushing against his.

"oh, please. look at you. you're hard as fuck. literally throbbing inside me like you're about to come from me just sitting on you. so don't act like you're not just as turned on by this."

he narrows his eyes at you, tongue in his cheek as he stares st you for a moment before speaking. "i'm a guy. you're naked, soaked and sitting on my dick. of course i'm hard."

he admits shamelessly, perhaps his excuse is valid, but you're still feeling the need to be bitchy. 'bullshit." you say.

 your hips move the tiniest bit, enough to make both of you feel tingles, but not enough to count as moving. he sucks in a sharp breath, eyes fluttering. 

"you were hard in the elevator. you were hard the second i started yelling at you in the car. admit it - you like it when i'm pissed at you."

he lets out a low laugh, elbows digging into the bed as he sits up a bit more. you both let out moans when the shift causes his hips to roll again.

"fine," he rasps. "yeah, i like it. i like when you get all fired up and talk back to me. turns me the fuck on. happy?"

you swallow hard, trying to ignore the way your body responded to his confession by clenching hard around him. his eyes darken and a groan slips out of him.

"but that doesn't mean i'm gonna apologise first," he adds quickly, matching your stubbornness. "you're the one who started going off about me being a few minutes late."

"those few minutes felt like hours when i was freezing my ass off waiting for you- " you abruptly stop because he purposely flexes inside you, making your thighs tremble. 

"jungkook," you warn but it comes out needy and desperate.

he smirks at you. "what? i didn't move, did i?"

"you're so damn infuriating."

"really?" he licks his bottom lip when his eyes drop to where you're both joined, before looking back up at your face. "come on, baby. move. i know you wanna ride me. i can feel how bad you want it."

yes, you absolutely do want it. you want to slam down on him and ride him hard. your pussy is throbbing, swollen and desperate. but you're not about to break first.

"no. you move, you apologise."

he groans again, closing his eyes shut as if he's praying for strength. when he looks at you again, his eyes are dark.

"you're pure fucking evil." he mutters.

his hands twitch at his sides and he has to fist them to prevent himself from grabbing your hips and fucking into you.

minutes pass by, both of you are breathing hard while staring at each other, trembling with the effort of not giving in. your hands ended up on his hard chest, feeling his heartbeat. jungkook's hands hovered uncertainly for a long time, but eventually they settled on your hips, caressing with his thumbs. you're trying not to clench around him, but every time you do, his eyes flutter and his fingers tighten on you.

you bite down hard on your bottom lip, trying hard to stifle the little whimpers trying to escape you. the still feeling of him is so overwhelming, it's making you insane, every time his cock pulses inside you has the demon inside you wanting to move.

jungkook's jaw clenches so tight you can see the veins standing out on his neck, and the sweat dripping down his forehead despite the cool weather. jungkook looks completely ruined, and the sight of him like this would have you feeling so victorious if you weren't feeling just as tortured as him.

finally your pride cracks and you plead with him. "move," you whisper. you didn't mean to say it out loud, it just slipped out.

for a moment you think he might put you out your misery and fuck you, but he doesn't.

"no," he says roughly. "you move and apologise first."

you laugh, but it's frustrated and annoyed. "you know you want this, jungkook. even more than i do."

"says the girl who's shaking on my dick." he shoots back. "you want this more than me, angel."

to prove that he's right, your body betrays you by tightly clenching around him again as if you're trying to pull him deeper inside you.

"y/n, stop fucking doing that-"

when you look at him, you notice that his eyes are almost wet, like he's on the verge of losing it. seeing him like this – jungkook, who's always so controlled and usually dominant – almost knocks the air out of you. you're so wet, it's embarrassing, arousal coating his cock, dripping down onto his skin. 

you lean forward so your forehead touches his and lips brush against his as you speak . "this is killing you, isn't it?"

he swallows hard, adam's apple bobbing. "you have no idea."

"i do," you admit. "because it's killing me too."

his hands slide up your sides, caressing your skin and stopping under your breasts. you bite your lip harder, feeling the urge to roll your hips and please both of you.

after a long while, both of you still refuse to give into each other. you just stay there frustrated in place.

"i don't get it, y/n." he mutters, eyes searching yours. "why are you so fucking stubborn? i didn't do anything wrong. i was late one time. traffic was shit, i apologised in the parking lot. why can't you just say sorry and let this go?"

he raises his voice, startling you since he never ever does that. you get the urge to cry. your shoulders drop, and the fight suddenly drains out of you. your eyes start to sting and blink a few times, trying to keep it together. but your tears fall anyways. jungkook's expression breaks, his anger and frustration are replaced by deep concern and regret.

"baby-?"

you shake your head, voice wobbly when you speak. "today was awful." you whisper. "everything went wrong. my boss made me look stupid in front of the whole team, he always does that to me... i don't even want to talk about it. and then i waited out in the cold forever, and i just... i didn't mean to take it all out on you. i've been so stressed, jungkook. i'm tired. i'm sorry."

+you've never mentioned your boss and the hardships you face at work to jungkook. knowing that he'd lose his shit. but today had been a lot, too much for you. thinking about what happened causes your tears to fall faster.

jungkook sits up fully, his cock shifts in deeper and both of you want to moan at that, but now isn't the time. his hands go around you to pull you against his chest.

"hey, hey, no-don't cry. shit, i'm sorry." his voice is soft and guilty. "i didn't know it was that bad. i should've asked and listened instead of getting defensive."

he cups your face, wiping away your tears with his thumbs, but more keeps coming. he leans in and kisses them away, kissing all the way down to your jaw.

"i'm sorry, baby," he murmurs against your skin. "sorry for being later. for raising my voice just now. for not seeing that you weren't okay. i'm really fucking sorry."

he kisses you properly after his most sincere apology. his lips are soft and gentle against yours, tasting the salt from your tears. you sigh into his mouth, your hands sliding around his neck to pull him closer to deepen the kiss since you've been desperate for it. you start moving, rolling your hips and grinding down on him making you moan into each other's mouth.

"i'm sorry too," you whisper against his lips, as you lift up and sink back on him, taking him deeper. "i love you. i love you so much."

he groans, hands tightening on your waist to help guide you now as you start riding him faster now.

"fuck, i love you," he says, eyes locked into yours. they're dark and wild, making your breath hitch. "i love you, my stubborn, infuriating, perfect girl."

you laugh softly and he kisses you again, swallowing the sound. your hands are everywhere, holding his shoulders, caressing his abs and chest. his hands roam just as greedily as yours. one cups your breast, thumb playing with your nipple, the other grips your ass, fingers digging in as he helps you bounce on him.

you ride him for a long time. both of you let out loud, pleasant sounds, whispering filthy praises and apologies between kissing.

suddenly, he lifts you up and flips you over. you're on your back now, he holds your thighs firmly and makes you wrap your legs around his waist as he settles between them. he thrusts back inside you deeply, making your back arch off the bed.

"jungkook-oh-God-"

he groans at your sweet sounds, his forehead dropping against yours. 

"need to fuck you properly." he murmurs.

he starts moving faster and harder, the feeling of him has you seeing stars. he grips your thighs, bringing your leg higher around his waist and grabs a handful of your ass, squeezing it hard as he pulls you against him to match his thrusts.

you touch him everywhere – hands in his hair, nails raking down his back. his mouth is everywhere on you, sucking marks onto your skin, kissing your lips hungrily. he doesn't stop fucking you perfectly. every time he pulls out and slams back in has you moaning his name out loud.

after a while, you release first, practically screaming against his shoulder. he follows a few seconds later, thrusting into you sloppily now before burying himself deep inside you and staying there while filling you up.

he half collapses on you, though he's careful not to crush you. his forehead rests on yours as you both of you pant into each other's mouths. for a while neither of you move from that position. eventually he pulls out, you both groan at the feeling of how sensitive you both are. he rolls onto his back beside you, hooks an arm around your waist and pulls you against him. you turn in his arms to place your head on his chest and throw your leg over his thigh. he holds you tightly, leaving kisses on your temple and the top of your head.

soon, you fall asleep in what you think of as your favourite and safest space – wrapped in jungkook's embrace.

         ୨ৎ

the next morning, you stir awake slowly, eyes fluttering open. once you're fully conscious, you notice jungkook's gaze on you. he's propped up on one elbow, his head resting on his hand, watching you with the softest expression you've ever seen on him. his hair's a mess, and the sheet has slipped down to his waist, revealing the red marks you left on his chest and abs. he looks so peaceful, possessive and utterly in love. it's like he's been staring at you for a long while, watching you sleep. 

you smile sleepily. he leans in slowly clearly wanting to kiss you, you mumble something about not brushing your teeth yet, but he clearly does not care. he kisses you deep and hungrily, tongue sliding inside your mouth. you a soft, embarrassed sound but he just hums, pleased and kisses you harder. his hand caresses your cheek before going under the covers to hold your waist and pull you right against him. you melt into the kiss despite your earlier grumbles about not brushing your teeth and your worries from last night about his absence.

when he finally pulls back, your lips are swollen and you're both breathing hard.

"morning," he says in that rough morning voice you love, his nose brushing yours.

"morning," you whisper back, cheeks heating up.

right after that, his mouth trails down your jaw and neck, licking and nipping at your skin. he goes down lower, kissing your collarbone, between your breasts and your nipples. you gasp at the sensation, arching into him.

"jungkook-"

"shh. let me make you feel good." he murmurs.

he disappears under the sheets, moving down your body. once he's settled between your thighs, he pushes them apart gently, then kisses along your inner thigh, teasing.

after his gentle kisses, he licks you all the way from your entrance to your clit. you moan out loudly, hands gripping the sheets when you hear his hum in approval. he goes straight to work, licking you hard and circling your clit. you're soaked, arousal mixed with his saliva. you grip his hair, needing something to hold. he slides two fingers inside you, finger-fucking you slow and deep while simultaneously sucking on you.

soon enough, you're releasing while moaning his name. he doesn't stop, only when you're weakly tugging at his hair from oversensitivity does he crawl up your body, kissing wherever he can as he comes back up. once he's back up, hovering over you, he kisses you slowly. you wrap your arms around his neck, pulling him down to kiss him even deeper.

"let's take a shower, hmm?"

he doesn't wait for you to answer him, he just picks you up and carries you the bathroom for a shower. in the shower, he helps you by washing you up, soaping your body, washing your hair and massaging his scalp. you return the favour, soaping his back, his chest and down his abs, teasing him by going lower until he catches your wrist, pins you to the slippery wall and kisses you dizzy.

soon the both of you finally come out the shower, wrapped in towels while trading lazy, loving kisses that he tries to turn dirty. you playfully swat him away so you can get ready for work.

every single morning, jungkook is always much faster than you are – already dressed in suitable work clothes while you run around like a headless chicken. he makes you coffee while you dry your hair. and every time he comes to check on you, you notice how he looks at you in the mirror. it's not like the playful and flirtatious way he usually does, instead it's more observant and watchful. 

when you walk into the bedroom to get dressed, he's already sitting on the edge of the bed with his phone in his hand. he dims his screen as you step in and his eyes lift to you immediately. he watches you as you change into your work clothes, eyeing your body with an intensity that makes you heat up.

"you're staring at me, you creep." you play it lightly.

he huffs out a small laugh, since keeping his eyes glued onto you. "can't help it. you're beautiful." 

you smile shyly and reach for your blouse. as you button it, jungkook leans forward with his elbows on his knees, fingers laced together.

"hey," he says softly. "can i ask you something?"

you nod, glancing at him in the mirror. "yeah?"

"your boss." he says carefully. "the one you say has been giving you a hard time. what exactly does he do to you?"

you stomach drops at the question and mention of him. some stupid part of you hoped that jungkook wouldn't have asked. but of course, he would. he's so protective over you, way too protective. you finish sliding your arms into the sleeve, focusing on the buttons so you don't have to meet his eyes.

"it's nothing," you say, trying to brush it off with a little shrug. "just typical superior bullshit, deadlines and nitpicking. the usual."

"Y/N."

the tone he uses makes you glance up at him again. his expression is calm, but there's something deeper underlying.

you force a smile. "really, kook. it's fine. and i don't really wanna talk about this. can we not do this right now?"

you focus on changing into your skirt and neatening up your hair. in the reflection you see him still watching you, his tongue is his cheek - the thing he does when he's usually pissed off and holding himself back. he relaxes himself and nods slowly.

"okay." he says without looking away.

you finish getting ready, and when you lean over the dresser to put your earrings on, he stands up and walks behind you. his hands settle on your hips, chin resting on your shoulder as he meets your eyes in the mirror again.

"you look perfect," he says, nibbling on your earlobe now.

you lean back into him. "thank you." he leaves a deep kiss on your neck before letting you go.

inside the car, he drives with one hand on the steering wheel and the other tracing circles on your thigh just as he usually does, except this time his hold on you is firmer and feels more protective. 

 ────୨ৎ────

it's been a few nights since yours and jungkook's silly argument and the insane deal that followed. at home, with him, things have been great. he's been on time for you every evening after work – sometimes waiting outside your workplace minutes before you even clock out. you know that being early for you might be challenging for him, because realistically his workload is a bit more demanding than yours is. but he loves you more than enough to go to that length to please you. of course, in return you reward him with sloppiest head or whatever else he finds pleasant. and whatever he finds pleasant – you do too. so basically, you two have spent the last few days fucking like rabbits.

you wake up slowly and a bit disorientated. your body is aching in best way possible. of course, the first thing you do is reach out for jungkook craving his warmth, but you're met the feeling of the empty sheets instead. you lift your head, seeing that the time on the clock is 2:18AM. his side of the bed is empty and cold, as if he's been gone for a long time, it makes you feel uneasy.

you sit up, rubbing your eyes, trying to listen for any noise to indicate that he's around. but there's nothing, just silence. you get off the bed to stand up and head toward the door with the intention of going downstairs to hopefully find him there. but just as you open the door, jungkook's already opening it from outside. you scan him immediately, sensing something off. even in the dark, you notice that his attire – he's in outside clothes, like he's just been out somewhere.

when he notices you, he jumps, startled. your stomach drops, not liking his reaction.

"hey," you say softly. "where were you?"

he's stunned for a few seconds, then forces a small smile. "just stepped out for a smoke. couldn't sleep, didn't want to wake you."

you instantly catch in that he's lying. he doesn't smell like smoke. he could've gone to smoke on the balcony. and who in their right minds would dress up just to go out to smoke?

you step toward him anyways, reaching out for a hug since you're still desperate for his warmth you couldn't have due to his strange absence. but he doesn't meet you halfway to bring you into his embrace, instead he leans in to press a quick kiss to your forehead, then your lips before you can fully process it.

"go back to bed, baby." he murmurs. "i'll be with you in a minute."

you search his face in the darkness with your heart beating a little too fast. "kook..."

"i'm just gonna shower quick," he says, already walking past you toward the en-suite bathroom. "just wanna wash up. go lie down, okay? i'll be right there."

he closes the door behind him before you can say anything. you stand there, staring at the closed door, listening to the shower starting up...

soon, you climb into bed and pull the covers up to your chin, lost in thought. where has he really been? and why is he lying to you?

      ୨ৎ

later on, you wake up feeling jungkook's lips on your shoulder, he leaves a kiss there, then another on the nape of your neck. his arm is over your waist, fingers drawing patterns on your stomach.

"morning, beautiful." he murmurs in his rough voice.

he leans in to kiss the tip of your nose, your forehead then your lips. you hum into the kiss, enjoying it, but your mind wanders to how he lied to you in the early hours of the morning – how he was supposed to be in bed cuddling you but was absent in bed, and walking in from somewhere else instead.

but right now, you don't want to think of that, he's kissing you so affectionately and loving, it has your mind going blank. 

he breaks the kiss to speak, "sleep okay?" he tucks strands of hair behind your ear.

"yeah," you lie a little, but smile anyway. "you?"

"slept so good after having you back in my arms." he kisses you deeper again, rolling you onto your back so he can hover over you, one of his thighs slide between yours. "you feel so good in the mornings. i could stay here all day."

you laugh softly, fingers threading into his hair. "we have work, unfortunately."

he groans loudly at that, burying his face in your neck. "unfortunately, we do."

he kisses you one more time, then rolls out of bed, stretching - you eye his delicious figure as the shirt rides up, revealing his body underneath it. you watch him walk out the room and down the hall. your suspicions from the morning aren't so worrying now. maybe you just overthought it, maybe he really just needed air.

you get up eventually, already dreading this day. you love your job, just hate your boss. over the past few years, you've been working at your job, he's tormented you and made most of your days a living hell. all because you refused to sleep with him. you could've reported him to hr, but it's unfortunate that the old hag is too powerfu. any of the poor other women who had gone through what you do and were brave enough to report it ended up jobless.

you've worked so hard to get to where you are, yes, you're qualified and deserving of a higher position, but the bastard has rejected you many times. your current position is forced to suffice, and it's something you can't afford to lose, so you have to endure all that he puts you through. the idea to tell jungkook has always called out to you, but he's way too crazy over you. if he knew what goes on, you're sure he might end up a killer. so, you've stupidly decided to keep to yourself.

you shower, do your hair and change, and by the time you're done, jungkook is as well. he's leaning against the counter sipping coffee, eyes lighting up when he sees you.

"fuck," he says quietly, setting his mug down. "you look way too good for that place."

"flattery won't get me to call in sick."

he steps close, hands going to your hips to pull you into him.

"worth a shot."

jungkook fixes your collar while you button his sleeves, you neaten his hair while he zips your skirt up properly, his fingers lingering on your thighs as you two have a small make out session.

by the time you make it to the car, you're both a little untidy and laughing at nothing. he drives with one hand on the steering wheel and the other intertwined with you to leave kisses on your knuckles every now and then. 

once he parks outside your workplace, he turns to you. "come here," he instructs.

you lean over the console, expecting a quick kiss but it's definitely not quick. his hand slides to the back of your neck, pulling you deep. his tongue slides into your mouth, tasting you. you gasp into the kiss, fingers fisting into his shirt, making him groan before kissing you harder. he squeezes your thigh, pulling you closer.

your lipstick is definitely smudged and your hair's probably a mess. you giggle breathlessly when he pulls back to let you catch a break.

"jungkook," you laugh, wiping his bottom lip with your thumb.

"you're gonna make me look unpresentable."

"that's okay," he says before stealing one deeper kiss from you. "then everyone will know you're mine."

you roll your eye with a racing heart, but of course you have to leave with one last peck. afterwards you get out the car, neatening yourself up before making your way inside. he watches you the whole way with a soft, possessive smile on his face.

the office feels different when you walk in. it's quiet in a weird way. your desk is still the same, everything exactly in place. but it's devoid of its usual tense, suffocating atmosphere. people glance at you as you pass, some offer small smiles. but no one is gossiping as they usually do. your boss's office door is closed with the lights off.

"hey," your only friend here at work says as she appears at your cubicle holding two coffees. "you okay?"

"yeah?" you say, confused. "why wouldn't i be?"

she leans in, lowering her voice when she speaks. "did you hear about mr kang?"

your stomach tightens at the mention of his name. "no...what happened?"

"i heard he called in this morning. said he had a 'family emergency' and won't be in all week. but-" she glances around before whispering softer. "someone said he was at urgent care last night. bruised and bloody... looked like he got attacked or something."

your heart stops, lia keeps going, oblivious. "weird, right? he's never missed a day...and hr sent an email - assignment of duties. everyone's freaking out a little."

you stare at your computer screen, fingers frozen on the keyboard. for some unknown reason jungkook's face flashes in your mind... or perhaps, deep down the reason isn't entirely unknown, but you're choosing not to consider it.

                 ୨ৎ

during the day, you've buried yourself in emails and reports. at about 3pm, you receive a new email, subject : reassignments. the email comes from director park – director park who's levels above your boss. to say you're nervous to meet with him is an understatement, but anyways you smooth your skirt, and make your way to the executive floor.

director park's assistant smiles when you arrive and waves you right in. inside, director park stands to greet you before gesturing to the chair across from his desk. the kindness and bright smile on his face eases your nerves immediately.

"y/n, thank you for coming. i'll get straight to it." he slides a folder across the table.

"effective immediately, you're being moved the senior strategics projects role. heard it's something you've applied for before."

your soul leaves your body – from hearing the greatest news. that role. the one you've always dreamed of getting. the one your prick of a boss rejected you for, even though you were perfectly qualified for it and suited for the roll.

"i... i don't understand," you manage to say in disbelief. "i thought the decision was already–"

he holds up his hand. "things changed. after an incident that i'm unable to get into detail about, i've done reviews on the workers here and find that your work is exceptional. you've really earned this, miss y/n."

tears prick at your eyes, you blink hard, trying to keep it together.

"this is... this is everything i've wanted. thank you. thank you so much."

he smiles, sliding a tissue over to you.

"congratulations. hr will send the formal letter this afternoon."

         ୨ৎ

by the time work is over, you're practically on cloud nine. you rush out the doors, eager to see him and bear the news. jungkook is leaning against his car in the pickup zone with his hands in his pocket with a smile already on his face as if he knows a little secret.

you start running toward to him, he pushes off the car just in time, catching you as you launch yourself at him. your legs wrap around him and he holds you steadily under your thighs as you bury your face in his neck.

"i got it, jungkook, i got i," happy tears fall onto his neck. "the promotion. the one i've always wanted."

he pulls back to look at you, grinning happily. "baby–" he laughs, spinning you around before setting you down but keeping you close. "holy shit, i'm so fucking proud of you."

you're crying happy tears again, laughing through it. "i can't believe it, kook."

he kisses you hard and you kiss him back, not thinking for a second that he may be one of the reasons you've so suddenly gotten this promotion.

                             ୨ৎ

at home, jungkook cooks your favourite dinner and gets out the most expensive wine you have to celebrate properly.  you both eat together then sip the wine until you're both tipsy and giggly. after some time, you both sloppily kiss each other. jungkook can't stop touching you, pulling you onto his lap with his tongue down your throat. when he pulls back, he's looking at you as if you're his everything and more.

"you're glowing," he says, staring at you with glassy eyes. "i've never seen you this happy."

you straddle him fully then, arms around his neck with your forehead against his. "because of you too. with you, everything is possible." you slur a bit.

his hands tighten on your hips; he looks so utterly satisfied hearing those words. again, he kisses you deep and passionately.

later on, when the wine bottle is empty, he carries you to bed. both of your clothes are taken off in record speed since he's eager to fuck the living daylights out of you.

he fucks you slow at first, eyes locked on yours as he said the sweetest things to you, about how beautiful you are, how much he loves you, how proud he is of you and how no one else could ever compare to you. after that, he goes faster and rougher. his hips thrust into you so passionately, you screamed out.

he'd take you in so many positions, had you in so many different angles, you discovered just how flexible you are. you and jungkook are always adventurous in bed, and with him you've discovered just how feral you truly are in bed. but tonight you've shocked yourself by how long you're going on for, you've released so many times. yet you can still go on.

he's got you on your back again, thrusting into you. his forearms are braced on either side of your head, caging you in. he's sweaty, the red marks you left on his chest are standing out completely - you don't think you've seen something so ethereal in your entire life. again, his eyes don't leave yours, he's staring down at you with that proud and possessive lovesick look he's had all night.

you're already so close, thighs trembling around his waist. gasping every time he bottoms out. your hands grip onto his shoulders, sliding up to tangle in his damp hair to pull him down for a messy kiss. he groans into your mouth, pounding into you harder.

"my perfect girl," he rasps against your lips roughly. "you're finally getting everything you deserve."

you whimper, arching into him, too lost in the overwhelming sensations to catch the weight behind his words. he slows down a bit, just to get in nice and deep and stay buried for a while. his hips circle in a way that feels so good, it has your eyes fluttering shut.

he speaks close to your ear, licking your earlobe, "no one's ever gonna stand in your way again, baby," he murmurs. "no one will ever hurt you and get away with it, i'll make sure of it. just like i did with him."

your eyes snap open, he doesn't stop moving. he cups your jaw, thumb stroking your cheek tenderly.

"i told you i'd take care of you," he whispers. "and i always keep my promises. i'm just sorry i didn't take care of it sooner."

  ────୨ৎ────

mrs. hans's apartment felt suffocating in a way or maybe you wanted to suffocate, you didn’t know. the spare room you stayed in had a small window where you constantly stared out of, lost in your thoughts.

you hadn’t left the bed in four days unless you had to venture to the bathroom. you didn’t have the energy to do anything other than grieve. the sheets were tangled at your feet along with a soaked pillow from the endless amount of tears you'd shed against it. your body ached from curling into yourself hour after hour, knees drawn up to your chest because you wanted to make yourself smaller.

you ate only when mrs. han appeared in the doorway, her kind face etched with concern as she carried a tray of food. meals she was kind enough to cook for you. when you refused to eat stating that you weren’t hungry, she would sit on the edge of the bed and spoon feed you like you were a child again. it just made you comply, not out of hunger but out of gratitude for her unwavering care and the way she never pried or judged you. it made you cry harder though because it reminded you of your mother.

but even that couldn’t fill the void left by the man you’d walked away from. she had never asked why you showed up on her doorstep the first night with tears streaming down your face. you could barely talk that night.

“i left him.”

that’s all you could let out. she had simply opened the door wider and pulled you inside without a word.

“oh come here, my love.”

her arms had wrapped around you, holding you as you sobbed against her shoulder while gasping for air. she had guided you upstairs, then murmured nothing more than “it’s alright now. i’ve got you.”

as she helped you out of your wet clothes and into a fresh pair of pajamas from your bag. she had tucked you into this very bed and sat there comforting you, hand resting on your arm as if to say she wasn’t going anywhere. she didn’t ask questions or pester you about what happened, she just let you pour out your emotions and gave you space which you needed the most.

every night since you replayed the moment you dropped the promise ring, the sound of it hitting the floor was still loud in your ears. it wasn’t just the ring, it was everything you screamed at jungkook especially when you told him that you hated him. you saw his face over and over. the immense pain in his face when you dropped the ring as if you were taking his heart right out of his chest with your bare hands. the way his hands had frozen midair as if afraid one wrong move would break you further and you had broken him.

every morning you woke up reaching for a body that wasn’t there, your hand falling to the empty space beside you because your body was used to sleeping with him after the trip to maldives because he didn’t let you out of his arms once. you missed him and you hated yourself for it—for the way your body still remembered the way he felt around you those stolen nights in the maldives and the gentle way he had guided you through pleasures you never knew your body was capable of feeling.

you hated how every time your mind wandered to the way he called you “baby” and the way he made you feel… you hated yourself for the fact that you couldn’t ever hate him even if you wanted to.

you couldn’t forget about your father as well, his words haunted your dreams and you'd rather die than turn out like your mother but you were still hurt from jungkook breaking your promise. the uncertainty kept you awake every night staring in the blank space. you'd just sit there all numb when you had no more tears to shed, you physically felt tired from crying so much.

mrs. han checked on you hourly and her presence helped you in a way reminding you that you weren’t entirely alone. she even sat with you longer than usual sometimes when you weren’t retreating, her hand squeezing yours as if to say she understood your grief. you had wanted to tell her everything but the words stuck in your throat. instead you just remained silent grateful for her.

a few days later mrs. han knocked slightly before entering with a tray of two coffee cups which hinted that she's here to stay. she set it on the nightstand before pulling out a chair from the corner of the room and settling it close to the bed before sitting down. as if settling in for a conversation that had been a long time coming, you sat up slowly propping yourself against the headboard.

“how are you feeling?” she asked.

“um okay…”

you didn’t know what else to answer and your condition gave the answer more than you could. she signed and handed you your mug first and you took it with shaky hands even if you had no urge to and the sight of coffee only made you think of jungkook more but you did for the sake of her. she waited until you took a small sip before speaking.

“he loves you.” she says simply.

her words brought your eyes to her face as she looked at you.

“the way he looks at you every time he visits the bookstore… it was like you hung the moon you know? not with possession no but with something else i don’t know.. that made my own chest ache in a way seeing it.”

your breath hitched as your eyes glistened and she continued.

“i’ve seen a lot of men in my years of running that bookstore darling but him? he was different… and i can tell you this for sure he's not like your father.”

her words settled against you in a way that made it hard for you to breathe. you stared into your coffee as your bottom lip quivered. she didn't speak further just sat there waiting, hoping that you could understand her. but as the truth of what she said sank in, you finally broke and a few tears escaped you before it turned into full blown sobs. you cried harder than you had in days, the sobs wracking your body. it wasn't just the tears for jungkook but for the little girl, you'd have been the one who convinced herself that she was unlovable.

mrs. hands's words exposed your wounds once again and you knew deep down she was right. jungkook wasn't your father. he had proven that a thousand times over in the way he took care of your needs without you asking, to the way he looks at you. yet you doubted him because he has broken your promise. mrs. han set your mug aside and pulled you into her arms without hesitation. she held you as you cried, her hand rubbing your back.

“there now, let it out.”

you clung to her, letting out small hiccupping cries and for the first time since that night, you allowed yourself to imagine going back. not as the broken girl who had to run but as someone ready to listen and let him in the way he had let you in from the very beginning. mrs. han didn’t say anything else, she just held you until you quieted. when you finally pulled back, wiping your face with the back of your hand, letting out an exhale

“take your time, dear.”

her knowing eyes met yours.

“but don’t take too long. some loves are worth the risk of getting hurt again.”

you nodded, your throat too tight to say anything and she gathered the tray before she left.

“rest now.”

you lay back against the pillow, staring at the ceiling as you thought of the man you had pushed away but this time not from hatred. then you realized you had fallen asleep in a peaceful sleep.

it was raining really hard tonight. mrs. han wasn’t home, she went to the bookstore to handle some work and you were sitting on the bed.

you were wearing a loose sweater and the storm had started slowly but now it was so strong that it was rattling the windows along with the thunder. you wrapped your arms around yourself trying to keep yourself grounded as the familiar memories flooded in. your father's face flashed in your head but before it could get any bad or you could get the usual panic attack, jungkook's face came in as if even when he wasn't physically here, he could still comfort you just by being in your thoughts. you remembered the first storm after your wedding and the way he'd stayed up for you the whole night in a sitting position, cramping his whole body just because you were scared while staying at a respectful distance.

“just focus on me. the storm can't touch you here, not while i'm here.”

“you’ve been through a lot y/n. i see it in your eyes but you're still here, still fighting… that’s not weakness. that’s a strength most people don’t have.”

you could still hear his voice from that night perfectly. now alone in this unfamiliar room, the absence of that voice hits you as unwilling tears well in your eyes. you got up from the bed not being able to sit still and paced in your room, focusing on it instead of your thoughts and tried to breathe in and out the way he’d guided you several times.

a sudden thunder lighted the sky again, making you flinch as you turned toward the window on instinct. your hand pressed against the glass as you peered out into the street below. and you expected to see an empty street as always but what you saw in the midst of the rain streaks made you pause. at first you thought it was just a shadow from the streetlamp but when your eyes squinted to look clearly, your blood ran cold.

leaning against the wall was a man. you couldn’t see his face but he was fighting to stay upright, he was soaking wet from the rain. that’s when you saw blood. even the rain couldn’t wash it away as if an immense amount of blood was leaking out from his head. he swayed one hand braced against the wall for support, the other hanging limp at his side bloody as if he had punched through hard glass. he lifted his head a bit and that’s when you saw who it was.

your mind blanked for a second as you tried to remain in denial. it can't be him. not here. not like this, please god not him but this was him. this was jungkook.

the realization hits you so hard that you almost fall over on your knees. your hand flew to your mouth, muffling your scream. how had he gotten here? why was he hurt?the questions piled up frantically but none of them mattered now as you looked at jungkook, looking so destroyed.

and you quickly stood up and propelled forward without a single thought. you ran across your room, yanking open the door so hard it banged against the wall because your only thought was to get to him.

he was hurt. he was hurt. he was hurt. jungkook was hurt.

you took two steps at a time almost tripping, your heart pounding so hard as if it wanted to break free and reach him first. you opened the front door, your eyes immediately locking on the figure in front of you.

he hadn’t moved, couldn’t move perhaps and he didn’t even hear the noise of the door being opened. blood started to pool at his feet and you let out a sob. he finally lifted his head sluggishly wide eyes in disbelief meeting yours he couldn’t believe you were actually here. he tried to reach for you but that’s when his weak body lost balance and he hit the ground with a loud thud.

“jungkook!” you cried.

you launched yourself to him, the rain soaking you as you kneeled in front of him grabbing onto his shoulder to steady him.

“oh god, oh god.”

you choked on your sobs as you cupped his face, urgently pushing back his wet hair that was almost covering his face.

“jungkook—oh god jungkook, what happened?”

your thumbs brushed on his cheekbones as the blood smeared but more chunks of bloody mess were released making your stomach knot. he was burning up and you looked him up and down, noting all the bruises as if he'd been in an accident.

he stirred at your touch as he took a deep breath, half lidded eyes locked onto yours. for a moment he just stared as if memorizing every detail of your face to convince himself you weren’t just a hallucination. because he's been hallucinating and imagining you a lot lately. you kept calling for him again and again, hands gripping his face but he heard nothing and only saw you. he was struggling to keep track of your movements. his lips parted and he smiled.

“k—koo it’s me. can you hear me?”

you repeated again as the rain soaked you both further, your legs all muddy from the ground.

“baby…?” he slurs.

“you… you came?”

the smell of blood was too much as he trembled against you as you fisted his shirt and felt his heart thumping too fast. almost weak as if it was fighting to keep up.

“i’m here.” you gasped.

“i’m right here koo. i’m not going anywhere.”

the way you called him "koo" and hearing it again that wasn’t his imagination but you were actually calling him that and it made a few tears escape him. he still couldn’t believe that you were real.

“you’re… real.” he rasped.

his free hand shakily lifted, gripping your wrist that was cupping his face brushing your wrist before falling back too weak to hold on.

“you’re here, you’re safe. the storm can’t—”

he broke off with a wet cough that makes blood come out of his mouth and his body jerked with the trauma it faced. his head lolled back but he forced it back up so he could keep his gaze on you. he felt like if he averted his gaze, you'd disappear just like the many times. you sobbed harder at his words as your grip tightened on him, seeing his condition and his words.

“shhh don’t talk.” you pleaded.

“save your strength. i'm getting help.”

his head fell on your shoulder with a groan and you cradled his head, carefully through his hair to avoid the injury.

“y/n… y/n…”

he kept on whispering your name like a prayer.

“i've got you.” you chanted.

“i've got you koo. please—please stay with me. just hold on okay? i'm not letting go.”

your voice cracked on the last word as you rocked him slightly but time was ticking by fast and his blood was staining your hands even falling on your shoulder where his head rested. there was blood everywhere. his chest heaved as if he couldn't even breathe properly.

“don't leave me again please.” he breathes.

fingers clutching your waist

“never again.”

you couldn't even speak, the rain and your own tears choking you as he buried his face deeper into the crook of your neck.

“i stood outside.” he mumbled against your skin.

“couldn’t… let you be alone. not like this stood outside… for hours j—just watching so you'd know… someone was here.” he stuttered.

the confession hits you so hard that you let out a wail from deep within your soul. you hated yourself so much. he was in this condition because of you. that’s when you felt fresh blood trickle down your arm from where your hand rested beside the wound. no you couldn't wait any longer even if he held you like he didn't want you to go and he wasn't even speaking anymore just pressed up against you while whispering things under his breath.

“stay awake jungkook.”

you begged shaking him gently.

“talk to me please.”

but he wouldn't and you were panicking further as you looked around and screamed.

“help! please s—someone help!”

you kept yelling, hoping someone could hear you even this late at night. you hoped for a taxi and you couldn't even leave jungkook here to get help in this state. the rain seemed to increase, showing no mercy while jungkook was bleeding out in your arms and you were losing your mind. that's when you saw a taxi driving past you and you raised your hand, yelling as it eventually stopped in front of you.

“please, i need to go to the hospital.”

you tried to bring jungkook to his feet yourself but it was hard and the driver was kind enough to help you as you both helped him on the back seat before you got inside yourself, his head in your lap.

“hold on.” you whimpered as you stroked his hair.

“we're almost there.”

the driver started the ride and you pressed the hem of your shirt against the gash in his head, hoping to stop the blood. his eyes drifted shut halfway there and every bump in the road elicited a groan from him and it felt like a knife against your chest. like you were feeling the pain yourself and worse.

“stay with me koo please please.”

you begged over and over, voice hoarse from crying as you leaned down, pressing your lips against his cheek as you sobbed against it but never stopping talking to him. you clutched his cold hand against yours with your free hand.

“you're okay, you're going to be okay. i'm right here. i'm not leaving just... hold on a little longer for me.”

“it’s all my fault. i’m so sorry.”

you cried against his ear, hoping he could hear you even when he could barely keep his eyes open.

jungkook was in a dreamlike state and he wondered if he was actually slowly dying because he felt a sense of peace and he could hear your sweet voice as if you were an angel ready to take him out of his despair. an angel who changed his life and in this moment if he died, he'd die a happy man in your arms.

“hurry please.” you yelled at the driver.

after a few dreadful minutes, the hospital came into view and the taxi came to a stop at the emergency entrance. the hospital staff swarmed him immediately and helped jungkook out of the car and onto a gurney. it was a chaos of nurses and staff but you stumbled through it all, your hand not leaving his as he lay there.

“he’s lost so much blood.” you gasped.

“p—please help him.”

he couldn’t leave you. no no, he couldn’t. his pulse was weakening and the doctors surged forward to take him inside the operating room, making you thrash as you sobbed.

“we’re losing him.” one shouted.

and you screamed with every ounce of your being, your hands clawing at the air to get to him as a nurse held you back.

“no!”

you chanted his name continuously as your hands finally left his, your body shook and your entire world tilted. your knees buckled and you sank down to the floor almost numbly. you stared down at your hands, looking at the blood stains and the sight made you cry harder.

you never thought it was possible to feel this much agony and the most you’ve felt was when your mother went into a coma and you thought no pain could ever be greater than that because your mom was so dear to you but you were so wrong. seeing jungkook so broken because of you hurt even more, to the point that it felt like your heart was bleeding out. to the point that you'd give up anything just to get him back.

it had been several minutes until you found yourself guided to a bench from the floor by a sympathetic nurse. every second felt like an eternity as you waited and waited. your tears dried on your cheeks and your eyes remained locked on the space in front of you as your thoughts swallowed you alive. you pressed your forehead to your knees. what if he didn’t wake up? what if the last words between you were your accusations? if something happened to him, you'd never be able to forgive yourself.

then from the end of the hall a figure walked in in an expensive black coat. kim taehyung. you recognized him from the photos jungkook had shown you once as well as talking about him back in the maldives.

taehyung's eyes scanned the room, landing on you and he was at your side in three long strides.

“you’re her.”

he says and it wasn’t a question. up close he was almost the same as jungkook—the same commanding intimidating aura but there was no time for introductions as a doctor came out of the operating room and you stood up on shaky legs, looking at him like your life depended on it.

“he lost too much blood.” he states.

“we need a donor immediately. his condition is serious.”

your mind reeled as you realized that your blood group didn’t match with jungkook’s but taehyung didn’t hesitate.

“i can do that. our blood groups match.”

“great, follow me then.”

the doctor nods, you were so utterly grateful for it that you could finally relax for a bit while hiccupping behind your palm. taehyung shrugged off his coat, rolling up his sleeve as they led him away but he paused only to look at you.

“don’t lose hope. jungkook is too tough to give up.”

you watched him go and you didn’t know what would’ve happened if he didn’t arrive on time with tears streaming down your face. it wasn’t much but it was everything. you were exhausted, not caring as people who passed by saw the mess you were in and the blood in your clothes. all you did was pray for jungkook so he came back to you.

taehyung emerged from the room twenty minutes later steadily making his way back to you, stopping at a respectful distance away giving you space to compose yourself. though his eyes took in every detail because you were the woman who was the reason why his friend jungkook was so broken and he was almost dying but he didn’t miss the way you were shaking in fear. he leaned against the wall opposite you, crossing his arms over his chest. for a long moment neither of you spoke, letting the silence and the hospital noise surround you both. finally he broke the silence.

“he’s stable for now. they said… they said if he’d lost much more, it could’ve been bad brain damage or worse.”

you paused as one hand flew to your mouth to stifle a sob.

“w—worse?”

your voice cracked as your eyes searched his face but taehyung's expression didn’t change. he pushed off the wall, taking a single step closer.

“he crashed his car but it wasn't serious and hit his head only. he lost too much blood and i'm guessing his pressure bottomed out on the way when he walked to your place right after it and lucky you got him here in time.”

you let out a broken sound, trying your best to not break down in front of taehyung as all you could still see was jungkook's pale face and the way he was all bloody.

“i should’ve, i don’t know—”

your shoulders shook as you were not able to speak. taehyung lowered himself to sit beside you with a sigh and he was silent for a while even though his expression remained composed, it was obvious that he was worried about jungkook.

“from what i heard from the doctor, you did everything right kept him conscious throughout the ride and helped him arrive as quickly as possible. that’s not nothing.” he mutters.

you wiped your face with the back of your hand, smearing more blood across your cheek without realizing it.

“you… you knew? about us? about everything?” you asked tentatively

taehyung nodded once, eyes fixed on the floor.

“i know as much as i should. i heard about the crash from one of the guys at the scene but jungkook wasn’t in the car and then i drove like hell to get here.”

he paused.

“look i don’t know the full story between you two but i know him better than anyone. i grew up with him in places… well we barely survived and let me tell you, he's not the man who hurts people for fun. if he went after your father.”

he trailed off but his dark eyes flicked up to yours for the first time since sitting down as if assessing you. you swallowed hard, not being able to look at him as you gripped your shirt tightly. that’s when you found yourself speaking.

“my father… he called me and said jungkook beat him even when he promised me he wouldn’t. i went to see him and he—"

you inhaled shakily.

“he said jungkook would turn out just like him, use me and then discard me. that i was worthless just like my mother and i believed him. s—screamed at jungkook, told him i hated him.”

all your confessions came out from the weight of your guilt already festering inside you. taehyung listened without interruption until you finished.

“your father’s a bastard. always has been from what jungkook told me in bits and pieces but you didn’t even let jungkook explain that night did you? he only ever laid a hand on that man to protect you. your father tried to get to your mother in the hospital to harm her and jungkook told me to stop him. hell yes jungkook hurt him before but it was only out of his love for you, not out of anger.”

a frown formed on his face.

“he kept it from you because every decision he made was to protect you, not to control you y/n.” he grumbles.

despite his calm demeanor, there was a fury that simmered beneath it and he couldn’t stop himself now that he was finally speaking out.

“he built a goddamn library in his house while you were gone with his bare hands, got them all bloody while learning how to make it just because he read it in your diary he wanted to make your dream come true. he was a mess, he didn’t eat, didn’t rest and just kept telling himself you’d come back to see it.”

you stared at taehyung with wide eyes, your heart pounding so hard you thought you'd collapse. the guilt crashed over you in full force because of the punishment you had inflicted on him for something he didn’t even commit and the words you'd spat at him walking away without even letting him explain

you hurt the only person who ever chose to love you, who hurt himself for the sake of you. you hated yourself so much. jungkook wasn’t trying to take advantage of you he loved you and you’d thrown it in his face.

“i… i didn’t know.”

that’s when the door of the operating room opened and a nurse stepped out.

“he’s stable now but still under anesthesia. only one visitor is allowed.”

she looks at the both of you and taehyung looks at you and nods. he stands up, offering a hand to pull you up. he walks you to the door of the private room where jungkook had been transferred.

“go see him, he needs you. talk, really talk it out once he wakes up.”

“i’ll be outside waiting.” he says.

you nodded tightly and pushed the door open with trembling fingers and there he was.

jeon jungkook—the man who held the power to buy and control an entire company with just a glance lay broken on the bed. an oxygen mask on his nose along with several tubes connected to his body and a thick bandage wrapped around his head stained with blood from where it had seeped through. now that the blood was cleaned from his face, you could see the bruises across his jaw. his rising and falling chest was the only proof that he didn’t leave you that he was actually here. he looked so small. so fragile.

the sight hits you like a punch and a wail rips from you before you can stifle it. you stumbled to the bed collapsing into the chair beside him, your hands hovering over his like you were afraid to touch. you were afraid that you'd break him further than you already had.

“oh god jungkook.”

tears spilled down your cheeks as you just cried your heart out not being able to help it.

“i’m so sorry. i’m so fucking sorry.”

you lifted his bandaged hand and pressed it to your lips as you looked at him with glistening eyes. you kissed each of his fingers slowly before pressing your forehead against his knuckles and letting your tears soak into his.

“i can’t—i can’t do this without you.”

you let out quiet whimpers.

“wake up please. yell at me, hate me just… don’t leave me like this.”

the heart monitor beeped as you cupped his cheek, tracing a bruise there as self loathing knotted your stomach until you felt nauseous. you'd spent days hating him for lies when all he had done was protect you and even went to every length to protect your mother too and you were so ungrateful.

you sat there for how long you didn’t know maybe hours, whispering apologies and more words until you could no longer keep your eyes open. you laid your head on the bed beside his hand, fingers intertwining with his not wanting to let him go.

“come back…”

you murmured before sleep took you in.

“don’t leave me.”

jungkook woke up slowly. the first thing that greeted him was the intense pain on his skull that felt like someone was hammering against his head. he groans and the last clear memory he had was of your beautiful tear streaked face in the rain as you held him. he blinked against the light and removed his oxygen mask, he got a smell of something sweet—vanilla your shampoo. where was he? where were you?

then he felt a warmth against his side and the way you gripped his arm. curled in the chair beside the bed, your fingers laced with his even in sleep. his heart broke seeing you like this but relief hits him like the first breath after holding it too long. you were here. you hadn’t left him to die alone in the rain.

his free hand moved on instinct, fingers brushing your cheek and you sighed in your sleep, nuzzling closer and his eyes burned with tears. she's here. she's real. she came back. he thought he'd lost you forever but here you were guarding his sleep just like once he'd guided yours. love swelled in his chest and he wanted to wake you, pull you into his arms, look at your eyes and beg for forgiveness but you looked so tired and you were gripping on his hand like you'd been holding on for dear life. he shifted carefully, wincing slightly but he held you closer to him without waking you up.

“my baby…” he breathes.

tears escaped him soon and he didn’t wipe them away as he let them fall, mingling with yours. you stirred murmuring something incoherent, fingers tightening in his. he knew one thing and that was now that he finally had you in his arms, he would spend every day proving that he's not your father that he will love you enough to let you break him a thousand times

the door creaked open and jungkook turned his head slowly and saw taehyung standing there, hands in his pockets. when he got the green light from the doctor, he didn’t waste any time coming inside the room. taehyung's gaze flicked from jungkook to you beside him, your face in the crook of his arm.

for whatever reason taehyung felt something from the scene from the way jungkook held you like you were keeping him alive. taehyung had seen jungkook bleed before and worse to survive but this? this raw devotion in his eyes as he looked at you. it was new and he thought back to the argument at jungkook's place before he left him there in rage but now seeing this… he understood. jungkook wasn’t just in love, in fact he was remade by it.

taehyung nodded, stepping closer.

“how are you feeling man?”

jungkook sighed as his hand tangled in your hair.

“like i got hit by a truck.”

jungkook jokes trying to lighten up the mood but taehyung doesn't smile, indicating that he's seriously worried and didn't find any humour in it.

“don't worry, i'm okay taehyung.” he rasps.

taehyung waved it off.

“don't thank me. you scared the shit out of me when i heard about your damaged car being found. i thought…” he trailed off.

“thought i'd lost you.”

jungkook shifted as guilt etched in his features.

“about the other day… at the house. i shouldn't have—"

“stop.” taehyung cut him off.

“you were hurting. i get it.. hell i pushed you there but don't apologize for it we're good.”

he glanced at you and his expression softened because once he thought you were ruining jungkook and he tried to explain that to him but he was wrong because you made jungkook whole in a way no wealth can.

“she's something huh? the way you look at her...”

jungkook's thumb traced against your skin, eyes never leaving your face.

“she's everything.”

his voice cracked.

“i thought i'd lost her for real.”

taehyung leaned forward.

“you didn't, you protected her with your everything and love her that's what husbands do.”

jungkook laughs bitterly.

“husband. yeah if she'd ever let me be one.”

he pressed a kiss against your forehead.

“i just wanted her safe and happy even if it's not with me.”

“bullshit.” taehyung cuts off.

“you fought everything to keep her and her mother safe. that's not a man who lets go.”

he squeezed jungkook's shoulder reassuringly.

“rest now. i'll handle the board and tell them their boss is on mandatory leave. all these remain a secret and if you need anything, call me you know i'm always here.”

jungkook nodded shakily. taehyung was so dear to him though he'd never tell him that.

“thanks tae. really.”

after talking for a bit long, taehyung finally bid his goodbye and left you and jungkook alone.

the doctor entered an hour later and you jolted awake at the sound of his voice. your neck was stiff from the awkward angle and you immediately turned to jungkook. he was awake and alive and okay. oh god he was here. your heart stopped and he was looking at you with a soft smile on his lips.

“jungkook—”

your voice broke into a sob but it was one of happiness as you surged forward but were careful to not hurt him, burying your face in his neck.

“you’re awake? oh my god.”

“shh baby girl.”

his free arm wraps around you, fisting your hair slightly in a desperate attempt to hold onto you.

“i’m here. i’m okay.”

the doctor cleared his throat politely.

“mr. jeon, i need to check your vitals.”

you pulled back reluctantly, wiping your face but jungkook's grip on your hand tightened desperately.

“stay.” he pleaded.

“i’m not going anywhere.”

you stepped aside as the doctor worked, checking his blood pressure and asking him questions which jungkook answered in short words. his gaze never leaving your face like you might vanish.

“so far nothing to worry about. i’ll check back tomorrow, call if anything changes.”

as he leaves you can’t hold back any longer as you cover your face and let out heart wrenching sobs.

“i’m sorry jungkook.”

“i’m so fucking sorry i hate myself. i should have listened. i should have stayed—”

the words tumbled out in a rush as you struggled to speak properly and jungkook pulled you close with what little strength he had. your hand rested against his chest as the beat of his heart comforted you. he pulled you closer until there was no space between you two as his breath hitched in your hair, you felt the tremor run through his entire body.

“hey…” he murmurs.

“you’re here. you came back to me that’s all that matters… don’t apologize ever. it was my fault too.”

his hands wiped at your tears but you couldn’t stop them.

“i thought i’d never be able to get you in my arms like this.”

he swallows hard and you felt the wetness of his tears as well as you both clung to each other and cried.

“never again okay? never fucking leave me again. i can’t breathe without you.”

you lifted your head just enough to look at him. your nose brushed his as you looked at the emotions in his eyes, so fierce your heart raced.

“i won’t.” you promised.

you pressed your forehead against him, you knew you shouldn’t tell him much since he just woke up but you couldn’t let him fester in the fact that he was blaming himself. he should know. he lets out a wounded noise as both of you breathe each other in.

“why koo? why did you drive like that? what were you thinking?” you hiccuped.

“you could’ve—”

you couldn’t even finish the word.

“died?” he finished softly.

“i know but i couldn’t let you face it alone. not after everything, i had to be there even after the crash, it’s like... i moved on autopilot, walking to the apartment just so you know i'm there even if you hated me.”

you gasped at his words, falling against him as you buried your face in his chest.

“don’t say that. d—don’t ever say that again. i don’t hate you i never did.”

he held your face hard as his brows furrowed together with angry tears leaving him.

“then don’t leave me again. please baby i beg you.”

“i can’t without you. those days… they killed me.”

“i’m not going anywhere. i swear it.”

“i swear koo i’m so sorry. taehyung told me everything about my mom and why you… i should have trusted you instead of my father.” you whimpered.

you pulled back just enough to look at him, thumbs wiping tears from his cheeks. a vulnerable look takes over his face.

“i broke my promise. i hurt him even after promising you—”

“stop.”

you pressed a finger to his lips, shaking your head stubbornly.

“you protected her, you protected me. that’s not breaking a promise that’s keeping one.”

you averted your gaze.

“i’m the one who’s sorry for not seeing it earlier and for leaving like that.”

he chuckles wetly as he kisses your fingertip and then pulls you down.

“no more apologies. just… stay.”

you nodded as his lips brushed yours.

“tell me i can kiss you…” he pleads

“kiss me please.” you breathe.

and his lips met yours in a soft kiss that deepened slowly, tasting tears mingling with the sweetness of your reunion. his tongue entered your mouth, lazily tonguing yours and savoring you with whatever energy he had left while stroking the back of your head. when you broke apart, breathless, he nuzzled your nose.

“how did you know i was at mrs. hans’s place?” you couldn’t help but ask.

“tracked your phone i had to know you were safe. i stayed away but i had to know and i don’t wanna keep any secrets between us after that night.”

you silenced him with another kiss, deeper this time as you sucked on his bottom lip, pouring every ounce of forgiveness into it.

“what would i do if i’d lost you? you silly man.”

you rush out in a tearful breath and he strokes your cheeks.

“you wouldn’t have..”

he looks you dead in the eye.

“i’d chase you to the ends of the earth baby, no matter what it takes.”

you both sobbed and laughed together as you pressed kisses to his jaw.

“don’t say that. don’t make me cry more.”

“too late.”

he steals another kiss, tongue tangling with yours like he had all the time in the world, angling your head in a way that coaxes soft noises from you. he kept on kissing you until you pushed him away slightly for breath.

“i love you so fucking much.”

“i know koo.” you breathed.

he groaned needily against you as his weak arm wrapped around your waist, pulling you half onto the bed.

“call me koo again.”

he demands as he nips your lower lip.

“koo.” you whisper.

and he lost it, kissing you harder and deeper as you both cried harder.

“koo koo koo.”

you kept on going because you couldn’t get enough of the look in his face. he looked at you dreamily, pushing a strand of hair behind your ear.

“i missed my beautiful wife so much.”

you flushed, looking down.

“i probably look like a mess right now…”

“nuh uh.”

he tipped your chin upwards until your eyes met his again.

“i’d have you like this forever—messy and perfect.”

you grinned as you slapped his chest slightly and he winced dramatically making your eyes instantly widen.

“i’m so sorry did i hurt you?” you panic.

jungkook laughs at your reaction with mischief.

“jungkook!”

you both shared a hearty laugh until your stomachs hurt and for a moment, both of you forgot that he was injured and you were back to being so happy and you knew this was something that would last for way too long, neither of you would change anything about it.

you didn't leave his side for the next three days.

slept in the chair and took care of him constantly, always on high alert in case he needs you. you fed him hospital food which he pretended not to hate for the sake of you and took the meds. you cleaned his face with a wet towel when he got random fevers due to his injuries until he was holding back tears from everything you were doing for him. you weren't only healing him but also the little child in him he once was who never felt a loving gentle touch of someone else.

the doctor also checked regularly and jungkook endured it all with gritted teeth because touch from anyone else made his skin crawl and he just wanted to yell at them to stay away but he tolerated it while he just wanted to take you home with him but for you he melted, he lets you change his bandages and even help him to the bathroom when he needs to.

“you don't have to do this.” he grumbled playfully.

“let me.”

jungkook had to force you to sleep some days because you fussed over him too much and forgot to eat and sleep yourself. he also made you sleep beside him on the tiny bed with you almost on top of him.

mrs. han also arrived the next day, carrying a bag of your belongings that you'd taken there knowing you'd need it. she took one look at your tired figure and red eyes from lack of sleep and she pulled you in for a hug.

“y/n… you scared me half to death running off like that.” she whispers.

“i'm sorry.”

you whispered as a few of your tears escaped because you needed that hug right now.

“it happened so suddenly i just didn't get the chance to inform you.”

"it's alright, don't worry, but just know i'm always here for you, yeah?" she says warmly.

you were more than glad about that and always will be.

you were currently sitting on his hospital bed as he traced the back of your waist absentmindedly.

the doctor entered, chart in his hand as you sat up looking at him slightly uneasily.

“mr. jeon your scans are clear and the concussion has resolved so i believe you can go home today.”

home.

jungkook's grip tightened on your hand, his eyes flicking to yours and you let out a quiet sob in happiness, not being able to believe it. you squeezed his hand back and gave him a teary smile.

“see? told you i'm taking you home soon.” he exhaled.

the doctor continued talking about discharge instructions about how jungkook needed to rest for another week with no heavy lifting or moving too much. you nodded at every word, memorizing them because you were set on being his personal nurse. you then packed up your things, along with jungkook's who watches you with loving eyes. when the doctor left, jungkook tugged you closer.

“you don't have to do all this you know.”

his lips peck yours softly as your arms wrap around his neck.

“i want to. let me do this please?”

he searched your eyes and saw the eagerness in them and nodded solemnly.

“okay.”

home wasn't just a place anymore to you, honestly it was him and being away after your argument and the hospital days had left you both missing the normality of it. jungkook wanted you back at his place because you belonged there, it was your house too and he was ecstatic over the fact that you were coming home with him because you wanted to for the first time and not out of obligation.

once everything was clear you and jungkook got inside another one of jungkook's cars, the car door held open by the driver. you both got in the backseat and he held you against his chest, not being able to keep his hands off you even for a bit. you stole glances at him and he was still a bit exhausted but the corner of his mouth twitched upward when he caught you staring. he leaned down, placing small yet several kisses on your cheek before resting his nose there just breathing you in and you leaned into him with a contented sigh. his hand gripped your thigh as the house came even closer and he realized he wanted this every day. as soon as the car stopped and you helped jungkook out before opening the front door

“ready?” jungkook asked.

“yeah.”

you whisper with a racing heart, coming back here feels like reclaiming a piece of you that you haven't known was missing. the first thing you heard was a loud bark as bam ran towards the both of you.

he launched at you first knocking the breath from your chest in the best way as he whined loudly, shoving his nose into your neck while he licked you desperately. you dropped to your knees and buried your face in his fur.

“oh baby boy, my sweet boy, i missed you so much.” you mutter brokenly.

you scratched behind his ears as your bottom lip quivered. gosh you missed your boy so much.

“were you good huh? i'm so sorry i left you, my love—i'm here now okay? no more leaving.”

bam whined louder as his tail wiggled hard.

jungkook knelt beside you, one hand on bam's head the other on your back, watching you both. seeing you like this a mess on the floor cradling his dog like he was your own twisted something in him. it felt like the entire house now that you were here was finally whole and full of love.

“he was a mess without you.” jungkook says thickly.

“slept outside your door every night, it was like he knew you were gone. we both did.”

you looked up, tears streaming down your face as bam rested on your lap.

“i'm sorry to both of you. i don't know how to—”

he pulled you and bam into his arms as you all held each other while bam squeaked in happiness, loving the fact that he's currently being cuddled between his parents and he barked once as if he were sealing the promise itself.

afterwards, when jungkook tried to stand, you were already moving your arm around his waist guiding him up the stairs because he was still weak.

“sit.”

you ordered once you were inside the bedroom, leaving no space for argument. he obeyed with no words easing onto the edge of the bed as you grabbed the first aid kit. before that you grabbed him a glass of water handing it to him.

“drink all of it.”

he took it, sipping slowly while you looked at the bandages on his head that haven't been changed.

“this might sting.”

you warned as you peeled them back gently and he took a shallow breath from between his teeth.

“i'm sorry.” you whispered.

your heart aches, feeling his pain as if it were your own as you dab medicine on his wound. the cut was healing but still raw and you blew on it softly, it was a habit from when your mother used to do it when you got hurt as a kid.

jungkook's eyes squeezed shut in ache and you froze as you cupped his cheek, pushing his hair back.

“did i hurt you too much?”

he shakes his head as his arms come up to wrap around your waist and pull you even closer, one of his hands slipping under the hem of your t-shirt to caress your bare skin making you shiver against him.

“i still can't believe you're real.” he rasps

“that you came back, that you're here fixing me when i'm the one who should be on my knees begging for forgiveness.”

you set the swab aside as you cupped his jaw.

“you're forgiven… a thousand times.”

you say it if only it made him feel better. he pressed his forehead against your stomach then wrapped his arms around your waist, hugging you like you might vanish. you held him even tighter, fingers threading through his hair as your brows furrowed with emotions.

it was like it was just the two of you at the moment and everything else disappeared as he held you, pulling back occasionally to press little kisses against your belly until you bit your lip to control yourself. you stood like that between his knees, his face buried in your stomach as both of his hands were underneath your t-shirt now as he rubbed slow circles on your sides and the underside of your breasts then down your hips to grip you tightly. the touches weren't actually sexual, more like touching each other to reminisce that this was real.

“i thought i lost you forever.” he whispered against your shirt.

“every night... i'd wake up reaching for you. the bed was so empty.”

your breath hitched as you remember how hard the nights were for you too.

“i know. i felt it too.”

he tilted his head and the rawness there made your chest cave.

“promise me. no more running, if something happens, we talk it out and solve it together?”

tears pricked your eyes, and you nodded, not being able to speak as he pulled you closer. you cupped his cheeks, leaning down to press your forehead to his before he kissed you both of you kissed sweetly as he rubbed your bare tummy, making you let out a high whimper, your other hand gripping his hair. suddenly you felt a tickle at your leg and pulled back to glance down. bam was nosing at it and you let out a watery laugh.

“he's jealous.” jungkook mutters.

“he should be. you're mine.”

the possessiveness in his voice made you smile as a chuckle left you. bam barked once before flopping at your feet dramatically.

“see? even he agrees.”

“it's more like he is disagreeing.” you giggle.

you start giving him pets while you both stay like that and you pull back for a bit to help jungkook settle in bed to get some sleep but bam starts whining loudly for more pets.

“greedy boy.” jungkook chuckles.

“like his dad.” you reply cheekily.

“damn right.”

you helped tuck the covers around jungkook as bam settled beside him too.

“sleep now. you’ve been on your feet for too long.”

he caught your hand as you turned away, pulling you beside him.

“stay please.” he whispers.

“i'm right here koo...”

you curled into his side as he held you close and he made slow circles on your back in contentment until he couldn't keep his eyes open anymore. you waited until jungkook fell asleep fully and then got from the bed with bam following you behind.

you walked to the kitchen and you realized you hadn't ever cooked here. it was your first time but you knew where everything was from watching mrs. kim and jungkook. you pulled out the ingredients from the fridge and other spices as you started cutting through the meat. bam sits beside you with puppy eyes and you smile and sneak him a scrap of meat.

“good boy.”

you smiled as he gobbled it happily and you couldn't help but speak to him.

“did you keep daddy safe while i was gone hm? i’m so sorry for leaving you both alone.” you breathe.

“did you miss me so much bamie?”

bam makes a pitiful noise as if he could understand you. it was born from his habit of listening to you while you always talked to him.

your mind wandered as you focused on cooking now while trying to adapt to the normality. once you finish it, you plate the chicken carefully along with the vegetables. that's when you heard footsteps behind you and you turned, a gasp leaving you. jungkook was leaning on the railing, hooded eyes fixed on you.

“koo! what are you doing down here? you're supposed to rest!” you exclaimed.

he shrugged, one corner of his mouth lifting. he woke up because you weren't there beside him and he didn't like that but now seeing you cook for him was a sight he could indulge in forever so he didn't mind.

“couldn't stay away while my wife's cooking for me.” he says.

your cheeks flushed at his words and you scoffed.

“sit down. the doctor said not to move much.”

he eased into a chair at the table as he drank you in while you slid the plate infront of him

“hope you enjoy...”

you are a little nervous now because he's never tasted your cooking. you watched as he cut a piece of chicken, bringing it to his mouth and groaned deeply, the sound making you tingle in a way.

“this…” he swallows, eyes closing briefly.

“god i forgot what real food tastes like.”

days of hospital food and he barely ate when you were gone. it felt like heaven now and even if you served him stale food, he'd love it because you made it. he took another bite and then held out the fork.

“you too.”

“it’s okay, i’ll eat after—”

but he cuts you off.

“now.”

his voice deepened to that usual ceo tone that he used to command people.

“or i stop.”

and you couldn’t help but lean forward, letting him feed you a bite and he watched your reaction.

“good?”

you hummed and he fed you another and then himself, the intimacy of it making your heart flutter as you watched him eat. you also served him seconds despite his protest because you loved to watch him eat and he had a big appetite, watching him eat like this was a different type of satisfaction. when the plate was empty, both of you were full and he set the fork down and tugged your wrist, making you straddle his thighs. you grabbed his prescribed pills before holding them out.

“open.” you say bossily.

he smiles and does as told before washing the pills away with water.

“mhmm… could get used to this.”

he places a kiss against your shoulder as your fingers go through his hair.

you both remained wrapped like that in silence, just breathing each other in and he hasn’t felt happier.

you’ve spent the next few days always hovering making sure he's healing well. you checked his temperature every hour so he didn’t have any fevers again. he grumbled every time.

“i’m fine woman.”

but he lets you all the time because he loves to have a reason to always have your hands on him and you also changed his bandage, always making sure to blow on it while he stares at you like a lovesick man. he called you his miracle though you wouldn’t agree because for you it was him, he came into your life like a miracle. you believed you'd hurt him enough and you were set on fixing everything.

“y/n, you don’t have to do this.”

“you’re always taking care of me so who will take care of you koo? so let me okay?”

your words made the both of you emotional because you knew it was true. he's spent so long always caring for you, now it was your turn and you were going to make the most of it. he’d also lost weight, you’ve noticed and the guilt wouldn’t leave you no matter how much he tried to tell you otherwise.

“you lost weight.” you said quietly.

he shrugged.

“just because of the accident, baby.”

“it’s more than that i know.. the days i was gone, you didn’t eat or sleep properly. i can see it.”

as you glance at him because you weren’t buying any excuses and you saw how much he’s suffered without you. he stilled and pulled you close to him.

“i’m sorry. i just wanna make it right.” you say shakily.

“shh none of that anymore.”

he soothes you, leaving a kiss against your palm that was cupping his cheek.

“thank you for being here for me…”

“i always will.” you confirm.

and you meant it.

it was a particularly sunny day.

jungkook was currently sprawled out on his back wearing nothing but sweatpants that were low on his hips, exposing his v line along with the faint trail of dark hair disappearing beneath the waistband. the sight made you blush but you tried to focus on something else. his hand rested on your waist and you were wearing one of his oversized t-shirts yourself.

your phone was in your lap as you scrolled randomly, both of you in a comfortable silence. a soft sigh escaped him as he shifted.

“baby… i think i need a shower right now. i feel all sweaty.” he rasped.

you hummed in response, not looking up immediately though a small smile tugged at your lips because he smelled like his own raw smell that was uniquely him with a hint of masculine something.

"it's not so bad… actually.” you murmur.

he chuckled lowly and it was the first real laugh you’d heard from him in days because he was feeling a lot better now without occasional headaches and sleepiness from the meds.

his gaze found yours and he propped himself up on one elbow and reached out without a second thought. his palm landed on your bare thigh as his thumb rubbed lazily, sending a jolt straight through your pussy as he kneaded the flesh there.

the tension between the both of you has been palpable these days, the way he watches you with heat in his eyes but you’ve been avoiding him since he has been recovering but you cannot disagree on the fact that you’ve been feeling needy too. the touches and kisses and nights curled into each other without crossing any line were threatening to burst finally.

you felt your heartbeat quicken as you looked at him with dazed eyes. he tilted his head, his voice now carrying that deepened intimate rasp that was reserved only for you and when he wanted you without mentioning anything.

“come with me then. keep me company? i didn't wanna be alone there… feels too quiet without you.”

your breath caught as you bit your lower lip and his eyes zeroed in on the motion, his eyes darkening at it as a deep approving noise left him. you didn’t know how to reply to him and before you could overthink it, he leaned in close, thumb tracing your bitten lip until you released it with a small pop then he closed the distance and pressed a small peck on your lip as you tasted the coffee you'd made for him earlier. he tilted his head, deepening the kiss for a bit before he pulled back with a lick on your lower lip. when he pulled back, he tugged a strand of your hair behind your ear gently before he looked at you.

“please sweet girl.” he whispers.

your heart pounded in your chest.

“i missed you so fucking much… all i could think about was coming home to you. let me feel you close?”

you gulped and nodded before you could think otherwise.

“okay… yeah, let’s go.”

his smile was wide as if you'd given a kid his favorite candy ans he pressed one last peck to the corner of your mouth.

“that's my wife.”

you stood first on shaky legs and padded upstairs to his room and you've started using his bathroom too now. he followed you behind at a slower pace as his eyes fell on the way your hips swayed and when you both reached the bathroom, he locked it behind him, the sound of the lock making your heart thud.

his bathroom was really spacious, almost two of the guest rooms combined. it contained a massive rain shower and a tub in the corner. jungkook rarely ever used it because he never felt the need to but with you in his life he wanted to experience all the little things, most importantly because it gave you happiness.

you twisted the tap as the warm water started filling the tub, fogging the mirror as well with the mist and you reached for a floral scented bath oil, adding a generous amount in. the smell of it calmed you instantly as you you heard the rustle of fabric hitting the ground. it made your shoulders tense though you couldn't turn around just yet as you pretended to focus on the water but you couldn't help yourself and some force always pulled you towards him. when you finally glanced over your shoulder, your breath stopped.

jungkook stood there utterly naked, looking like a sex god and you were seeing him completely bare after so long that it almost felt new or more like you can never get used to seeing him like this despite the few times earlier. every inch of him was on display from his broad, muscular body and lower... fuck lower. his cock hung heavy between his legs, already half hard as he caught you staring, you lost your focus and shyness watching the veins there along with the swollen head that was starting to release precum making your mouth water involuntarily.

his posture was confident as he didn't bother covering himself and he fully didn't have any shame at being like this in front of you, in fact it boosted his ego. your heart ached as you saw the bruises on his body even more clearly now. he just held your gaze with those intense eyes and when you caught his stare, your cheeks turned red as you looked away quickly. he noticed, of course he did and a small smirk took place in his mouth as he took a step closer.

“like what you see baby?” he drawls.

his voice teasing but also full of longing for you.

“or should i turn around? give you the full show?”

your cheeks reddened even further if that was possible as your gaze kept snapping back though this time to look at his eyes.

“jungkook... you're—"

"hard for you?" he finished for you.

he crossed the distance as his hand found your waist.

“yeah i have been fighting it since you've been sleeping with me in the hospital bed while i can't do a damn thing about it.”

you squeaked loudly at his words and he leaned down, whispering in your ear.

“it's been over a week since i buried my face between your legs? you think i'm not suffering?” he questions roughly

tears brim in your eyes at his words, both from the sadness and the hunger for him but he stepped past you without another word, lowering himself into the water with a sign of relief. the tub was huge enough to easily fit three people but jungkook took up most of the space and his legs had to strain a bit because of his tallness as he leaned back against the edge, arms draped along the sides like a king on his throne. your legs squeezed together as he extended a hand toward you.

“come here.”

you fidgeted on the spot, fingers twisting the hem of your t-shirt nervously. you've been completely bare in front of him several times and there wasn't an inch of you he didn't see but you still felt overwhelmed after everything. you averted your gaze from him, forcing your eyes on the wall instead since it made you feel even more shy. jungkook's eyes softened slightly since he could always read you like a book even when you're slightly unsure, he could pick it up instantly.

“y/n.” he called softly.

"you don't have to undress fully if you're not feeling it sweetheart. keep the shirt and pants on for all i care. just...be here with me…that's all i want.”

the way he always kept your comfort at first eased something in your chest but it didn't make you back off but brought a sudden confidence instead. your hands trembled as you gripped his t-shirt around you and peeled it up over your head before letting it fall to the ground, revealing your body in a matching simple baby pink bra and panties. he watched unblinking, his hands clenching into fists.

“beautiful.” he says almost to himself.

“always so fucking beautiful.”

he looks at the way your nipples strained against your bra and he didn't look away as he took you in properly after it's been too long.

“god baby... you're killing me… look at those pretty nipples bet they're sensitive as hell right now.”

you whimpered because he was so right and he learned so much about your body in such a short time. encouraged by his praise, you reached behind your back and unclasped your bra and it fell away making your breasts bounce free. you gasped slightly as the cold air brushed against them. a guttural groan leaves jungkook.

“fuck yes... look at those perfect tits, missed them so much.”

jungkook was a vocal man when it comes to sex and he didn't keep his compliments and needs to himself.

your half lidded eyes meet his as you pant and remove your panties next, slowly hesitating for just a beat for him to nod encouragingly.

“don't be scared with me y/n. it's just me, show me everything.”

you slid down your panties with a final breath, revealing your puffy glistening mound. you felt more vulnerable than ever but he looked at you like you were a goddess. he always did. he made that sound again that makes you feel dizzy as he looks you up and down and you almost feel the urge to cover yourself but keep your hands aside because really it was just jungkook. the man who'd taught you pleasure without touching you, who taught you how to orgasm and to not fear intimacy.

“good girl, so wet already… all for your husband huh? come here let me take care of you.” he gruffs out.

you felt like you were going to collapse as you stepped into the tub carefully. he reached for you immediately guiding you down until you sat on his lap with your back on his chest. the second your ass settled between his spread thighs, you felt it—his cock which was fully erect now pressed insistently against your back and you took a sharp breath, your head falling back against his shoulder as his lips brushed your ear.

“feel what you do to me mhmm?”

one arm banded around your waist as he pulled you impossibly close and his arm rested just below your breasts causing them to pop out of the water surface lewdly as they squished against his arm, your nipples grazing his bicep with each of your breaths.

“are you okay?” he murmurs into your hair.

“tell me if it's too much.”

you shook your head.

“no it's... perfect.” you say breathlessly, filled with anticipation.

you always knew you could surrender your body to him and he'd make you feel amazing without ever pushing you to the limits.

“hmm…”

he trails open mouthed kisses along your neck as his tongue darts out to taste you against your pulse.

“missed this spot here.”

his teeth grazed against it just enough for your back to arch with a moan.

“the way even the slightest touch against it makes you let out such pretty noises.” he growls.

“koo...”

his hand on your waist began to wander dipping lower to your hips as you squirmed, thighs pressing together instinctively but he was faster as his legs nudged yours apart until you were spread open on his lap, leaving you exposed even when you were under the water.

“jungkook…” you whined needily.

“shh i know.”

his thumb stroked the sensitive skin of your inner thigh and the water amplified everything making everything slicker and more intense.

“just relax and breathe for me sweet girl. i got you.”

he paused for a bit, breathing against your shoulder.

“but seriously baby, tell me if you want me to stop anytime. i mean it.”

you twisted your head to catch his eye and you melted at the look there but you hoped he could see the way you wanted him in your own eyes.

“don't stop please... i need you.”

“fuck.” he grunts.

“say that again.”

“i need you jungkook.” you repeat for him so he knows.

he didn't waste further time because who was he to deny what his wife wants?

he parted your legs wider as he skimmed you over your pussy mound but never quite touched where you wanted it. as he teased you, he would barely graze your throbbing clit but pull away soon after. you made a frustrated little noise and he chuckled at how cute you sounded.

“look at you.” he says huskily.

“such a good girl—my good girl bet that pussy missed me didn't she? already begging for my fingers huh? tell me.”

you whimpered hips chasing his fingers involuntarily, you felt out of your mind now and it's been too long without him so you didn't want any teasing.

“oh god yes... please touch me.”

“needy little thing can't even wait huh? but shitt i love it.” he coos.

finally fucking finally his hand cupped your pussy fully, palm pressing against your clit as two of his thick fingers slid through your folds.

“ahh, ughmm.”

a cry left your mouth as he started spreading your wetness all over your pussy underwater as your sensations felt tenfold before his fingers circled your clit with the pad of his thumb.

“holy shit.” he groans lowly.

“this is all for me? my cock's leaking just thinking about how tight you'd feel wrapped around it.” he says almost angrily.

"y—yes yes, only you hahh—"

your voice breaks in a squeal with your back arching almost off him as he presses harder, thumb flicking your clit side to side which makes you see stars at the perfect way he knows how to play you as you grip the edge of the tub tightly.

“that's it my sexy girl, ride my hand.” he coaxed you.

as his lips returned to your neck, sucking until he put on a mark

“grind on me like you mean it…show me how bad you want to cum.”

“koo… koo.” you chanted his name while panting.

you couldn't help it as your hips rolled, grinding on his hand even if he wasn't fingering you and was just touching your nub, it still felt so overly intense as the water sloshed around you both from the movements. your lips remain parted with nonsense escaping it but that's when the reality crashed in suddenly and you stopped your movements as your eyes flew open and your hand clamped his wrist to stop him.

“jungkook, wait!”

he stilled instantly.

“baby what's wrong? did i hurt you?” he questions worried that he triggered you once again.

“no i... i forgot you're still healing and the doctor said to not strain. we shouldn't y—you shouldn't do anything that'll hurt you more.”

he laughs slightly and cups your cheek to make you face him.

“baby… i'm fine. promise, yes my head hurts sometimes but it's nothing compared to the ache of not touching you.”

he soothes you by pecking your forehead but you still look at him unsurely.

“the doctor clearly said light activity will help with the blood flow and fuck sweetheart feeling you like this? it's the best therapy in the world but if that's what you want, we stop.”

he squeezed your thigh gently even though his cock was painfully hard and throbbing. you searched his face and he looked understanding yet stubborn.

“i just... i don't want to lose you again or hurt you. not to something stupid like this.”

his expression softened.

“you won't and most importantly, this isn't stupid and i'm right here with you aren't i? my sweet girl's so worried so i'll compromise. do what you want yeah? i'm all yours.” he replies lovingly.

relief and affection swelled in your chest even when your cunt clenched with its unfinished relief but you wanted to focus on taking care of him like you've done the past week.

you twisted in his arms to face him so you're straddling him now, your legs on either side of him, breasts brushing his chest and he groaned at the contact, hands settling on your hips to steady you as he looks at the flush on your cheeks, your lips red from biting on them and he wanted to spin you around this instant and make you cum. you reached for the shampoo bottle and squirted some into your palm before rubbing your hands together and threading your fingers through his long dark hair also using some water to foam it up. you started a slow massage and he melted instantly, head lolling back against the tub.

“oh fuck... yeahh right there.” he signs.

his arms tightened around your waist, pulling you flush until your breasts were practically almost on his face and you yelped, trying to move away but he held you tight.

“you're a goddamn angel. keep going baby.” he rasps.

you obliged a small smile on your lips at his reactions and your capability at making him feel like this as you dug in his hair a bit more while avoiding his wound and used your nail to scratch his scalp slightly, also removing the foam so it doesn't get on his eyes. he almost whimpers and the sound makes your pussy weep and you were still spread over his cock which was twitching against your inner thigh and you could just change your angle a bit and his length would be resting right against your entrance. you felt like you were going crazy and not being able to breathe.

“feels like heaven.”

he turned his head and buried his head between your breasts as his nose brushed one nipple.

“oh god…” you mewl.

“missed your hands on me… look at these.”

his eyes cracked open, locking on your bouncing breasts.

“so fucking pretty. they want my mouth don't they?” he growls.

you huffed but didn't respond but you didn't have to because the wanton look on your face answered him. you pushed his head back to rinse his head with the handheld sprayer using your hand to do it thoroughly as his eyes remained closed in contentment and as the last bit of the shampoo washed away, his hands found you.

“oh!”

you keened from surprise and he grinned wickedly while thumbing both of your nipples.

“gotcha.”

your toes curled against the tub as he started pinching and rolling the nipple between his fingers until you were letting out gasping whimpers, hips rocking instinctively.

“these little things… always so responsive. remember our first day in the maldives when i taught you how to touch yourself and you were so ready to cum just from touching them?”

“i’m going to make you cum just from playing with these nipples one day.”

“jungkook fuck—” you sobbed.

you reacted even more from the memory as your pussy clenched constantly, your hands fisting his wet hair as he leaned in capturing one nipple between his lips. your head falls back as he suckles you.

“please pleasee, mhmhh yess.” you begged for him.

that fueled him to suck harder and it almost felt like he was playing with your clit and he suddenly released your nipple with a wet pop before he moved to the other one.

“you missed this pretty girl?”

you nodded dumbly while pressing your boob further into his mouth.

“yes... yes… missed you… so much.”

his free hand kneaded your neglected breast supplying attention to both, fingers plucking your nipples until you're a writhing mess on his arms. the way his teeth scraped and you felt yourself release more slickness beneath the water—it was too much yet not much at the same time. you wanted more. you lived in sensations only as his mouth devoured your breasts and he couldn’t help himself but his hips jerked up slightly for some friction. you gripped your own hair with the other hand as your eyes rolled to the back of your head.

“god i could do this for hours.” he rasps.

you were his favorite weakness to exploit. he pulled back just to admire his work on your breasts. the hickies there and the way both of your nipples were swollen from too much attention. you laughed breathlessly, the sound turning into a moan as he flicked it one last time just to see your reaction.

“nghh.” you whined.

he was enjoying pushing you to the edge but making you wait so you'd understand how he felt the past week and he liked having you being fussy but still shy enough to ask for what you want.

“you forgot the conditioner baby.” he smirks.

your eyes opened and your brows furrowed, an unconscious pout on your lips which made his heart ache almost but he had his plans. you grabbed the conditioner applying it through his strands while he watched you, mesmerized as you worked it thoroughly with shaky fingers. as you were done rinsing it, he grabbed the shampoo bottle himself and you watched him.

“it’s my turn to pamper you now. you don’t get to be the only one to hover now.”

you smile bashfully as he pours some shampoo on his palm before applying it on your hair, massaging the shampoo with his big hands and you relax against him.

“lean back.” he instructed softly.

your head falls on his shoulder as you let out breathy sighs as he takes the tension you didn’t know you carried as you grow all boneless.

“mhmm…”

“you’re tense here.” he noted.

his thumb dug into the base of your neck.

“all that worrying for me constantly right? you deserve a break too sweetheart.” he murmurs.

he went on with his work after the shampoo, he also applied the conditioner with the same care, taking his sweet time. the water was cloudy now with bubbles and when he finally finished, you turned to him again cupping his face in both hands. you both stared at each other as your thumbs traced the scars on his face and his chest, some healing and some still raw.

“my baby…”

he lets out a wounded noise as you lean forward and press open mouthed kisses against each of his scars, your tongue tracing the ones that were fully healed. you moaned as his hand fisted your hair while he exposed himself more for your kisses and you pulled back grabbing his hand. you looked down at it. his hands were no longer bandaged but the scars and split knuckles were still very visible. you pressed a kiss against each of them like you’d done when he was unconscious in the hospital before your tongue traced more scars on his chest making him groan.

“heal fast okay? for me?”

he watched you with bedroom eyes, cupping the back of your head.

“baby... you’re gonna make me cry.”

your own eyes were getting watery and he pulled you to him, lips crashing into yours as he swallowed your little moans. his hands roamed up your back before going down to squeeze your ass cheek making you yelp into his mouth.

“wrap your legs around me.” he rasped brokenly.

“need you closer goddamnit—need to feel all of you.”

you did as he told and the position made both of your cores aligned, his cock slid between your pussy lips going dangerously close to your entrance. you both moaned together because you’ve never been so close like this enough to have both your private parts touching with no barrier.

“ahh j—jungkook.” you crooned.

“shit baby, feel that?”

he broke the kiss as both of you panted against each other.

“so close… so fucking close to being inside you. you have no idea how bad i want to just—”

you whined about not being able to control yourself and after being edged for so long, your hips rolled experimentally and the drag of his length through your folds made you squeal with a cry as your clit caught there. it’s a feeling unlike anything you’ve felt before even if he wasn’t inside you—that hardness of him and the way your virgin pussy gaped as if so empty. you’ve never felt more empty.he lets out an animal growl gripping your ass to still you for a moment.

“i just wanna slide in deep and stretch this tight little cunt till you’re sobbing my name but not yet not like this.”

you looked at him with teary eyes.

“we’ve waited this long… i can wait more. i wanna make it special for you..”

you nodded dazed with a pounding heart but your body had other ideas as if it was out of your control, hips circling grinding down until his cock was trapped between you, rubbing up and down your slit with every motion. you were so horny out of your mind and calling for him. you wanted to cry just because you wanted to cum.

“oh god.”

he couldn’t stop himself from seeing his wife like this and his hands guided your movements.

“ride me angel. use my cock to get off hump it like you own it. you're so wet honey. i bet you'd take me so good if i left you.”

you wailed at his words, your nails digging into his shoulders as your wet hair fell on your face, but you were too far gone to care. the friction was everything—the way it stimulated your clit and the way the tip of his cock slid just inside or you didn’t know if you were imagining it from how horny you were as you rocked harder.

“ah ah oh uhh.”

you were letting out uncontrollable broken noises along with “koo koo please” that made his nostrils flare angry with need. he recaptured your lips in a messy tongue kiss, his tongue fucking into your mouth in time with hips that rubbed your cunt then biting gently on your lower lips. your desperate noises were like music to his ears.

"you want me to fuck you don't you huh?"

"yes god yes, fuck me." you babbled.

you were completely lost in the haze as the tip of his cock pressed just inside, giving you the barest taste of fullness. he hummed, rocking up to meet you but slit and pulled back at the last second. he was so huge and you wondered how you'd ever take him inside you.

"not yet pretty girl. when i fuck you for the first time, it's going to be slow and romantic in our bed where you're fully ready for this. no rushing but this? this i can give you."

his hand slipped between you, angling his cock so the shaft pressed against your clit directly and he thrusts helping you grind better.

“oh my god koo ahh yessoh, i’m gonna—fuck it’s so much.”

you could barely talk as your breasts bounced with your movements and he started pinching and twisting your nipple and you were full on crying now.

“come on my cock baby.” he urged roughly.

“rub that clit all over me, let me feel you gush.”

he was almost slapping your clit with his cock now and it was making you feel like you were burning and you sob in ecstasy. one hard twist of your nipple had the coil snapping so hard that you cum with a loud scream on his shoulder.

“jungkook!”

you saw white, your head thrashed left and right while he helped you ride out the last waves. he didn’t cum or chase his own release, too focused on you and he held you through it, hand cupping your ass in a comforting way. he placed kisses against whatever exposed skin he could reach, gathering you like something precious in his arms.

“there you go. that’s my girl soaking my cock so good. so proud of you baby.”

he continues murmuring praises and sweet words to your ears as he cradles you close until your breaths even out. you both remain in the tub until the water turns cold. you were the first to stand on shaky legs, his eyes watching the water drip from your body as he rose behind you as well. he then reached for a towel first and he helped dry your body with it as you watched him silently with flushed cheeks before he pulled it close around your body. goosebumps rising on your body from your damp skin and also because of his proximity, your body still humming from the pleasure.

“you’re shaking.” he mutters.

his thumb stroked your shoulder and you leaned against him instinctively and he wrapped the towel tighter around you, tucking the end securely at your chest before placing a kiss against your neck. he grabbed himself another towel before knotting it low on his waist even though he'd rather have you naked with him but he didn't want to overstimulate you further as of now. he was obsessed with the look of your afterglow, the way you seemed to have that dreamy yet ruined look in your face, it made him want to take you again before he bent down and picked you up bridal style making you gasp.

“jungkook wait, you’re hurt. i can walk—”

he hushed you with one look and you bit your lower lip as he took you inside the room. he puts you down on your feet after, his hands not leaving your body.

“mine…” he rasps.

he kisses you slightly as you both soak into each other for a bit more.

“let me help you dry up.” you murmur.

your breath shakes as you grab the hair dryer, your eyes focused on jungkook who gets on his knees for you before you could say anything else. the sight knocks the breath from your chest.

“stay still.” you whisper softly.

you didn’t want to mistakenly touch the wound on his head and jungkook’s lips curved up in a way that made your heart race. he didn’t move. he kneeled obediently for his wife as his hands slid up your thighs and went under the towel's hem, resting just below your butt cheek. you bite your lower lip exhaling because even if you orgasmed minutes ago, his touches and the way he was kneeling for you were sending you spiraling once again and you were just in a tiny towel, mostly worried that you'd mistakenly flash him again.

you switched on the hair dryer and tilted his head back slightly as you worked his wet strands carefully. he hummed as your fingers combed through his hair.

jungkook watched you the whole time, eyes half lidded but intense in a way as if he could never take his eyes off you. even if he wanted to.

“i love this.” he said suddenly.

you paused, fingers stilling in his hair.

“what?”

“you… taking care of me like this.”

his brows peaked at the center.

thumbs tracing circles on your knees unconsciously as if even saying the words out loud ached him.

“i’d stay on my knees for you all the time if it meant i’d get this…” he breathes.

a lump formed on your throat as you set the hair dryer aside.

“it’s nothing…” you whisper.

he shook his head, thumbing the back of your thighs.

“it is. it’s everything… you’re everything.”

tears welled in your eyes and you didn’t speak further because you knew you’d burst into tears immediately and for now you only wanted to care for him. something that he missed all his life and deserved. you wanted to give him every bit of adoration.

you ran your fingers through his now dry hair one last time. you grabbed a hairband and put his hair in a loose man bun fumbling a little since you'd never done this before, only watched him in passing.

“is this okay?” you asked.

once you're done tying his hair with the elastic. a few strands escaped like they always do and he reached up, touching it like it was something precious before his eyes met yours with such rawness.

“perfect.”

“better than i can do myself.”

a small watery chuckle leaves you and he smiles. before you could respond, he shifted and his hands slid down to capture one of your feet. he lifted it slowly and you gasped, tripping forward slightly.

“koo what—”

“i’m sorry.” he interrupts brokenly.

he pressed his lips to the arch of your foot like he was kissing away sins as your eyes widened, your heart trying to make its way out of your chest.

“for everything.”

he placed another kiss before continuing.

“for not telling you about your father sooner.”

kiss.

“for making you cry.”

another kiss.

“for not being enough.”

his teeth nipped your ankle, tongue flicking out just enough to taste your skin as he pressed a loving kiss against each toe. he made sure every bit of you got the same attention. you were his woman after all and he'd always kneel for you. worship you.

“oh god.” you whimpered.

your head felt dizzy and you gripped onto his hair to stay upright on your weak legs. you could barely breathe from the vulnerability of the moment.

“i’m sorry for loving you too much.”

his voice breaks. you didn’t realize it but you were full on sobbing now, your hand pressed against your mouth. you were so overwhelmed from the things he made you feel.

he trailed kisses up your feet, reaching to the sensitive spot on your knee. you panted, hand fisting the towel to your breasts. his free hand guided one of your thighs over his shoulder, hitching the towel high enough to reveal your entire bare bottom. your lips remained parted as he looked up at you, eyes filled with apology and hunger. his hot breath brushed against it.

“i’m sorry for every time i held back when all i wanted to do was bury myself inside you and never leave.”

you sobbed at his words. his lips found the area where your thigh met your hip and sucked lightly in a way that made you arch into him with a squeal.

“jungkook!”

you made a noise that was half sob, half moan. your hands left the towel, not caring at this point if it fell down completely. you couldn’t take it anymore.

“don’t p—please.” you begged.

“don’t say sorry. it wasn’t your fault. just please—it hurts.”

his forehead pressed against your thigh as he just breathed in your scent for several minutes.

“then? what do i do?” he rasped.

“tell me how to make it right.”

you shake your head as your bottom lip quivers and try to tug him up but he resists, his eyes locked on the area between your legs from where the towel had ridden up. he leaned in and pressed a kiss right over your throbbing clit.

“ahh.”

you bucked as a whine escaped you. he kissed it again, lingering on your mound, watching the way your pussy wept for him. the way it gapes and releases your slick juices.

“i don’t want your apologies jungkook. i just want you here with me.”

you wanted him safe and no longer dying. he groaned out an animal noise, burying his face in your lower stomach for a moment, hands squeezing your ass like he needed to ground himself. then he rose slowly, towering over you and pulled you flush against his chest.

“tell me i can have you like this forever.”

he grunts against your cheek.

“that’s all i need.”

“yes…”

that’s the only word you can let out before his mouth crashes into yours desperately while squeezing you against him so tight that it almost hurts as if he could make up for all the lost time with just the kiss alone and the kiss spoke louder than words can.

“you’re enough koo... more than enough.”

the next few days passed like that and obviously you didn’t stop with your usual care for him. jungkook decided to call mrs. kim for helping around.

you wouldn’t lie but you missed her too. she was an anchor to you when you first came to this house and you were used to her presence. you haven’t seen her since going on the vacation.

“you need to stop this.” he murmurs, holding you against him as you make soup. you set the bowls down frowning.

“stop what? feeding you?”

he chuckled lowly.

“feeding me like i’m an invalid, you’ve been at it nonstop since i got home. let me help.”

you turned in his arms, poking his chest lightly.

“you’re still healing and i can handle the kitchen. i don’t mind.”

though his expression shifted from playful to serious.

“that’s why i called mrs. kim.”

you blinked. “you what?”

“she’s coming in a few hours.” he explained, stroking your cheek. you nodded, swallowing hard.

“i just… i wanna take care of you.”

he leaned his forehead to yours.

“you are every day but i need you whole too.”

the interaction with mrs. kim was everything when she came back, her eyes lit up when she saw how close the both of you looked and when she saw how tired you were, she instantly shooed you away from the kitchen. she didn’t know the several things that have happened between you and jungkook but she knew one thing as she saw the possessive way jungkook held you that things changed for the better. that’s what she wanted after all, for you both to be together and she always believed at the back of her mind that you both, no matter the obstacle would always find your way back to each other.

“you’re happy.” she said later.

when jungkook stepped out to take a call as she chopped the vegetables beside you.

“different like you’ve finally let yourself breathe.”

you nodded with warm cheeks as you glanced at the doorway where he talked on the phone. soon the days changed, with you spending more time with jungkook.

“you’re such a mama to me.”

he grinned lazily as he watched you button up his shirt and you pushed at his chest with red cheeks.

“stop.”

he caught your wrist pulling your hand to his lips, kissing it.

“never, i’d get my head bashed in a hundred times if it meant this—you caring and fussing over me.”

tears glistened in your eyes immediately, brows furrowing.

“no don’t say that, please.”

you couldn’t even handle it as a joke but he meant it with his entire heart as he wiped your tears away that he wouldn’t mind being so close to death if it meant it had you looking at him like this every single day.

things started changing more when jungkook asked mrs. kim to shift all your belongings from the guest room to his room permanently. you didn’t say anything with a racing heart but you saw the intense way he looks at you because you now fully spend time in his room anyway. so slowly all your belongings took place with his too.

“i made space for your side in my room.” he said simply like it wasn’t the most intimate declaration he’d ever made as your hands find his chest.

“my side?”

“ours.”

because now his drawer full of dark suits also held your light colored clothings, your skincare items, your books and so much more—a room that actually looked like one that belonged to a couple. you helped mrs. kim place your items in the drawer when he pulled you close sneakily and when she wasn’t looking, his lips met yours hungrily despite your attempt to push him away.

“i like my side here.” you breathe when he pulls back from the kiss.

“good, get used to it.”

and he knew his room would never feel empty again just like his heart.

the clock on the nightstand read 2:30 am.

you lie on your side with jungkook's arms wrapped around your waist as his breathing hits your neck. he'd been deep in sleep but you woke up suddenly and weren't able to sleep afterwards.

you shifted slightly, careful not to wake him and turned your head just enough to watch him. his face was always so much softer when he slept as his lips remained slightly parted, his chest rising and falling with his breaths. the bandage on his head had been changed that evening by you as well and the wound beneath it had healed so much from your relentless care in changing dressings twice a day and applying medicine there so you were sure he'd be able to take the bandage off completely in a few days.

you lifted your hand and brushed your fingertips over the edge of the bandage, the one that made him lose enough blood for you to lose him. leaning in you pressed your lips to it as if your kiss could erase the scar entirely. he didn't stir but his arm tightened instinctively around your waist, pulling you closer in his sleep as a lump formed in your throat.

how had your life become this? one moment you were the girl in your father's house being abused and starved as you didn't know how to survive. the next thing you knew, you were here in a bed feeling safe wrapped in the arms of a man who had crashed his car just to stand guard outside your window, bleeding and broken because he couldn't bear the thought of you afraid and alone.

you had hurt him so much and tried to push him away from you. yet he always just loved you unconditionally, never even raising his voice at you, never forcing you and always keeping your comfort first and he changed your whole perspective of a man that all men really aren't the same. he came in your life when you were at your lowest and changed it in the best way and you'd repaid him by hurting him even more.

your fingers drifted lower, cupping his cheek that has started gaining color after he's been eating well these past weeks. you traced the little mole just beneath his lower lip, that tiny spot you loved so much and let your thumb brush his lips as he sighed in sleep.

“y/n...”

the sound of your name escaping him made your eyes water as you leaned forward, pressing a kiss against his chest before leaning your head against it. your palm rested right over his heart as all the sweet memories you've spent with him flooded in your mind. you didn't know if the broken pieces of you would ever be mended but you want to change and try for him so you'd give him back what he always did but you knew one thing that you were trying and you wished one day you'd be capable of loving him the day he deserves.

after a while of just watching him sleep, your throat grew dry with thirst so you slowly slipped free carefully. jungkook's brow furrows as he murmurs something incoherent and his arm falls to the empty space on the bed as if you never left.

you padded downstairs and walked straight to the kitchen before you filled a glass of cool water and drank it. setting it down, your eyes caught on a door one that was locked before because it was a spare room but now something glowed beneath it. curiosity made you walk forward as you opened the door and gasped loudly.

it was like the room came out of your dream with walls lined with shelves and filled with books along with a ladder with fairy lights strung like stars. a window seat piled with cushions that overlooked the window as you remained there frozen. it was... perfect. exactly as you'd written in great detail in your diary, one that you'd always believed would stay there alone. a home library to hold more than enough books and a seat by the window where you can read until the world forgets to hurt

you stepped inside on shaky legs as your fingers tried the spines of your old books that jungkook had set based on their genres and from learning how you liked to organize your books. you'd completely forgotten about taehyung's words in the hospital when he mentioned the library because after coming home you were too busy doting on jungkook and caring for him. that's when your eyes fall on the dark stain on one of the shelves as you knelt and touched one, realizing it was old blood.

you couldn't breathe as you kneeled on the ground and gripped one of the shelves for balance. he had built this with his own hands while you were gone and his hands bled because he spent days trying to perfect it and he even cleaned it properly but forgot about this blood stain. you couldn't hold it anymore as a loud raw sob tore from your throat, your hands covering your face as you cried so loudly that it was ringing in your ears.

your eyes fall to the camera next on the table that jungkook used in maldives with several stacks of pictures, all were pictures of you. you in the maldives, laughing or you with the turtle and building a sandhouse and you asleep, with some of them capturing both of you looking so happy and some even capturing the way he looks at you. there were hundreds of them. he had clung to these while you left him hurting alone, some pictures were crumbled as if he'd held onto them for too long.

another sob wracks you louder now as you lean against the shelves. how could he love you this much? you didn't deserve it, you had screamed hatred at the only man who ever saw your scars and called them beautiful. tears blurred your vision but you couldn't stop looking at the pictures and it was like every moment was frozen in time with a happy ending you never got in life but you threw it away because of your father, who'd done nothing but ruin you and your mother further.

“i don't deserve him.” you wailed in the empty room.

"i don't i—i don't—"

you clutched one of the pictures of both of you against your chest and sobbed harder. you cried for the man who never got love in his life, who was tossed away by his own parents and built his life from his blood, sweat and tears who swore off everyone in life yet he loved you as if you were the part of his soul.

you got out of your trance when you heard a loud noise of shattering glass from upstairs, yanking you out of your thoughts as you quickly scrambled to your feet. a gasp leaves you as you hear a loud guttural scream of your name and it is jungkook's voice. your heart lurched and without wasting time, you bolted from the room and frantically climbed up the stairs, scared that something had happened to him.

“jungkook!” you yelled.

he stood in the middle of the room with a vase that was on the nightstand now on the floor all shattered and he looked like a wounded animal, sweaty and a mess, his eyes frantically looking around searching for something with panic. one of the glass shards pierced the sole of his foot and he was bleeding. he breathes hard before his wild eyes lock onto you. he woke up from a nightmare where he lost you once again where you were saying you hated him again and again while he ran after you to catch you but you disappeared fully, leaving him in complete darkness and he woke up with a scream. not finding you beside him triggered him even more. the dream felt too real, just like when you actually left him and he found himself consumed in it.

the sight of him like this, feral and bleeding because of you knotted your stomach.

“jungkook oh god, what happened? your foot—you're bleeding!” you cried.

you rushed to him and he didn't wait as a broken sound of relief left him and he lunged forward, his strong arms wrapping around you, squeezing you so tight that it hurt but you held him back just as tight as you sobbed, his heart pounding so hard against you as if it might burst. his face buried into the crook of your neck as he squeezed you while trembling violently against you.

“you're here… fuck you're here baby.” he gasps as tears stream down his cheeks. he clung to you like a drowning man and you were his only oxygen.

“i dreamed... you left again. you said you hated me, dropped the ring and walked out the door and i couldn't i—i couldn't stop you fuck. i thought it was real this time. please please don't—"

you sobbed into his shoulder, your arms desperately gripping on him just as fiercely as he leaked more blood from his foot but the pain didn't even register to him, all he wanted was you.

“i'm here koo. i'm not going anywhere, i swear. shhh it's okay it was just a dream.”

you murmured soothing words against his ear, hoping it gets to him and he calms down as you pulled back slightly to look at his feet.

“sit down please. let me look at your foot, you’re making it worse.” you pleaded.

as you guided him backward towards the bed and he sat down, his grip on you never loosened as if you might disappear if he did. you knelt before him about to grab his feet to take a look but he held your cheeks, thumbs brushing away your tears as his gaze burned into yours with anger.

“why do you do this to me?”

he growls edged with that hurt that broke your heart even more. his fingers fisted in your hair desperately as he tilted your head back to force you to meet his gaze.

“i love you so fucking much it ruins me. every day without you was hell… and now you're here and i still wake up thinking i've lost you. stop making me feel like this.”

his voice cracks and now you can see the boy beneath the man who'd endured too much loss and you were another fragile thing he was scared would soon lose. tears streamed down your cheeks as you shook your head.

“don’t say that, jungkook... i... i can’t continue seeing you like this. stop loving me so much if it destroys you. don’t hurt yourself more.”

he grips the back of your throat and pulls you closer as he makes a guttural sound.

“stop loving you? you're the only thing i ever needed baby, without you i'm a fucking dead man." he rushes out.

you hiccuped against his lips as he nuzzled your neck, inhaling your scent that he can never get enough of, something that grounded him as both of your tears streamed down. you pulled back enough to address his foot, your hands shaking as you gently lifted it inspecting the wound.

“hold on koo. this is gonna hurt.”

with a steadying breath you grasped the edge of the piece that was stuck in his foot and yanked it free carefully, biting your lip to stop the sob at the way he hisses in pain.

you snatched a tissue, pressing it firmly against the open wound to stop the blood as he stared at you the whole time.

“tell me you’re mine…” he growls.

his thumb brushed your lower lip, parting it slightly and your free hand slid up his thigh with a racing heart.

“i’m only yours, jungkook.” you say tearfully.

you grab a bandage for his foot since the blood wasn't stopping and once you were done, he couldn’t wait anymore. with a growl he tugged you forward, hauling you onto his lap so you straddled him, your thighs on either side. you were wearing panties only under your nightie and it pressed against the growing hardness of his cock beneath his boxers.

“need to feel you.”

“wanna feel you’re real p—please.”

you looked at how vulnerable he looked and you wanted him to know you were there and you wanted to prove it to him so you took your black nightie off, revealing your naked body beneath with only your panties. he groaned and pulled you in a messy kiss full of longing as his hands roamed your bare back, gliding over your skin mapping every curve like he'd forgotten in your absence. he touched you like there was no tomorrow and he felt feral, you wouldn’t lie if you said you felt otherwise. you gasped as he pulled away from the kiss and bites against your neck, leaving just enough pain to turn into pleasure that makes your head fall back.

“oh godd.” you whimper.

he sucked on a spot beneath your ear.

“missed you so much can’t get enough of you.”

you arched into him with a gasp, finding yourself just as crazy as your breasts brushed on his sweaty chest. he groped one to his will, weighing them in his hands before kneading the soft flesh, squeezing just hard enough to make you squeal against him. you pushed yourself further into him as he rolled your nipples between his thumb and forefingers.

“j—jungkook ah yes…” you breathed.

the pleasure, the pain and the way he was rough in his touches were making you increasingly wet and you weren’t able to stay still, rocking against him in needy circles. the friction of his clothed cock against your soaked panties was maddening and he leaned down to capture one nipple into his hot mouth, tongue flicking the bud expertly.

“love the noises you make for me angel…”

he pulls back to talk right against your breasts which were coated in his saliva now as he breathes against them, making you shudder and whine.

“it tells me you’re real that you want me as much as i want you.” he grunts.

“i do…”

he moaned between them, placing open mouthed kisses there until he reached your stomach, his hands kneading your ass cheeks at the same time making you grind harder against him. your thoughts went all over because he always went on worshipping your body but tonight you were set to make him believe exactly how much you wanted him.

you weren’t bold when it came to bed as you pushed him back gently on the pillows as he looked at you confused but as your hands started exploring him, his face cracked to one of pleasure as he leaned back against the pillow. you kissed some of his scars there, tasting the salt of his skin as your nails brushed against his abs.

“you’re so strong, koo… so beautiful even like this.” you whisper in awe.

his jaw clenched as a tear streamed down his cheek at your words and you trailed lower, your shyness at the back of your mind for now, you just wanted to please him so he knew you were here and not going anywhere else.

you slowly tugged his boxers down and his thick cock sprang free and slapped against his stomach making him groan. the sight makes your thighs squeeze together hard as you lick your bottom lip in anticipation.

“fuck baby… yeah touch me. been dying for your hands on me.”

his hips bucked slightly as you wrapped your fingers around the base of his dick, your fingers barely meeting him as you stroked slowly at first. your eyes meeting his half closed ones watching the way he fisted the sheets. you spread the precum on his tip smearing it with your thumb and you brought your fingers to taste the salt of it.

“fucking hell!”

he lets out an almost pornographic moan, his head falling back, adam's apple bobbing as he watches his wife about to go down on him. he was so lucky to have you.

“that’s it… just like that. learned so quick didn’t you mhm? my perfect wife.” he praised roughly.

you blushed, remembering the boat in the maldives when he'd taken his time teaching you how to please him as your cunt clenched emptily. your hands pressed against his stomach as you watched his expression and you slowly leaned down, your breath brushing against the tip before your tongue flicked out. you hummed in approval as you took the tip inside your mouth making him curse under his breath.

“shit—your mouth..”

you took him deeper then lips stretched around his girth as you bobbed your head slowly, hollowing your cheeks for suction that drew a loud moan from him. saliva dripped messily down your chin, mixing with his precum as the wet sounds of your slurps and your gasps filled the room.

“mmphh!”

you let out muffled noises as tears streamed down your cheeks from softly gagging when his hips twitched upward without control as you took more.

“such a good girl shit… my good girl.” he grumbles.

he couldn’t take his eyes off you as he looked down at the way your lips stretched for him while your breasts swayed. you couldn’t stop as the memories of his lessons fueled you, your free hand cupping his heavy balls rolling them gently as you choked on him as your nose brushed against his pubic hair from how deep he was inside your throat.

“easy baby, don’t take too much if you can’t.” he says between gritted teeth.

but you gave him a determined look because he deserved it as he looked at you with love and lust. the sight snapped something in him at the way you looked at him with glistening eyes and with a growl, he sat up abruptly. he manhandled you so quick the breath was knocked from your lungs as he flipped your positions until you were both sideways on the bed. he seated you until your pussy was right on his face and you both were in a sixty nine position.

“need to taste you.” he snarls impatiently.

you whimpered around his cock as you were practically gushing, pretty sure that you were dripping through your panties. you took your mouth off his cock to speak.

“koo wait, it’s about you—ahh!”

your protest dissolved into a cry as he hooked a finger in your panties, yanking them aside to expose your weeping pussy. he looked at the way it was quivering and he groaned at the sight his nose brushing your clit as he inhaled your scent deeply. you sobbed against his thigh at how dirty yet lewd his act was.

“bullshit, it’s about us. you didn’t think i would let you go unsatisfied while you please me huh?”

without warning his tongue delved in, lapping a long stripe from your entrance to your clit that had you keening with a squirm. you completely forgot about his dripping cock in front of your face for a moment as your hips jerked. his tongue curled inside to scoop your essence.

“ohh gosh, mhmm.”

you tried to keep up and give desperate licks and sucks on his cock as pleasure took over you but he didn’t care about himself and was focused on you. one of his fingers spread your folds wider to expose you completely and the cute bud throbbed shyly under his gaze but he knows it wants attention but he wasn’t in the mood to go slow tonight that’s why two thick fingers pressed in as he impaled you with them making you let out a quiet scream of his name. he curled them immediately, hitting that spot inside you before pumping them in and out watching the way you take him.

“your pussy’s sucking me in honey… so tight it missed my fingers so much yeah?”

“nghh ah ah hahh.” you panted mindlessly.

he sucked your clit between his lips, flicking it while he fingered you to oblivion and such sensations along with his cock were all too much, you felt like you were going to collapse. he was like a man possessed right now who was set on pushing you towards the edge so fast his fingers were scissoring to stretch you wider but he wasn’t done. his free hand kneaded your ass, thumbs parting your cheeks to expose the tight ring of your asshole that was clenching and that was never touched before not even by you.

you froze for a bit as you realized he had you so exposed and could look at all your holes and you thrashed on his lap but he wouldn’t do anything without your permission.

“can i taste you here baby girl?”

he questions almost gently as he rubs your back and you breathe harshly against his cock, tears streaming down your face and you nod.

“i want your words baby.” he pushes.

“yes please.”

your voice breaks.

“look at this pretty hole… bet it'd taste even sweeter.”

you yelped as he spat directly on it before watching the glob trickle down your pussy where his fingers were still buried. his tongue then followed, circling the rim with laps that made you speak nonsense as you bit down on his thigh to control yourself. he used different motions to lick your clenching hole, holding your cheeks apart with both hands for better access while his fingers plunged deeper into your pussy, his tongue almost entering your ass and the dual penetration making your vision white out.

“oh my god, jungkook—too much! i—i can’t ahh!” you wailed

the words were garbled around his length as you gagged because he was currently inside your throat. jungkook didn’t stop and doubled his efforts because he knew how much to push you because the way you were humping his mouth like a bunny on heat said otherwise. your butt hovered high, presented to him like an offering and you took your mouth off his cock because you weren’t able to breathe properly instead you palmed his cock, thumbing the slit as he rutted shallowly into your hand.

he growls against your pussy hips, snapping to fuck your mouth with angry thrusts, claiming your mouth as you alternated between sucking his cock and his balls. his liquids were getting all over your face but you didn’t mind at all because you were doing the same to him. you both were acting like animals at this point but neither cared as he wanted to claim you and mark you as his.

“take it baby. make your husband cum.”

his tongue delved deeper into your ass while he curled his fingers against your g-spot, his thumb now rubbing tight circles on your clit. it felt like you were getting tortured but the sweetest kind that you wanted more and more of.

“nghh, jungkook wait!”

you shattered or you blacked out you didn’t realize because your walls fluttered wildly around his fingers as you squirted on his face with a loud sob around his cock. he lapped at everything greedily, delivering three more powerful sucks on your swollen clit which almost felt like it was on fire but you didn’t relax as you focused on sucking his cock hard while rolling his balls between your hands as you indicated to him without words that you wanted him to cum. he wasn’t far behind, he holds your head down and with a deep thrust into your mouth, he hits the back of your throat and he holds there.

“y/n... y/nn...”

he breathes your name like a prayer again and again before he pulls out just in time to stroke his cock right in front of your face until ropes of his cum land on your face and breasts. your own hand wrapped around his, helping him milk himself dry and he was a gone man at how perfect you are and he rewarded you with a loving bite on your ass that was still facing him. your breasts heaved as your face was soaked with him, sticky and messy and he growled with each pulse.

“b—baby you’re gonna kill me. come here.” he signs

he pulls you close before you could fully catch your breath as you fall on your back and he sits up, spreading your legs. you were boneless and limp, having no strength as he went between your thighs once more to clean you properly. his tongue cleaned your slickness, lapping at your release gently until you whimpered and squirmed. he keeps on going until you cum once again.

“it’s too much k—koo.”

“shh i know, baby. just cleaning you up.” he coos.

he rubs your belly and when he made sure you were fully clean, he placed a sweet final kiss against your quivering clit. he holds you in his chest then grabs a tissue to clean your cum soaked face and himself in the process. the room smelled of sex and sweat but neither of you cared as he held you protectively, one hand cradling the back of your head before placing kisses on your hair, your forehead and your nose, everywhere he could reach.

“i love you… so much it scares me sometimes.” he chuckles brokenly.

“you’re my everything you know? my entire heart.”

“i’m right here… i always will be koo.”

your lips press against his as you look at him with glistening eyes and flushed cheeks from your orgasm. you both lay there just staring at each other, his fingers intertwining with yours, rubbing the back of your hand.

before he pulled back to reach into the drawer of the nightstand from where he pulled the promise ring that he'd kept safely there when you dropped it. the sight made you whimper in pain and how empty your hand has felt since you took it off. you held your hand in front and he slowly slid it onto your finger before bringing it to his lips and kissing the ring.

“i’m so sorry i took it off.” you hiccuped as you leaned your head against him, both of your tears mixing together.

“we’ll fix this together… promise me you’ll never take this off again.”

his thumb strokes the ring as if it held your future and you nodded, admiring the way it looked on your finger.

“always, i promise.”

“you’re stuck with me.”

and you let out a watery laugh as both of your legs intertwines under the sheets, your arms around each other as you both fit perfectly.

“i wouldn’t want it otherwise.”

and you knew you were exactly in the one place you wanted to be your entire life. the one place you were searching for. in his arms where your home was.

and you meant what you said with your whole being because this was it.

this was forever, if the universe allowed it.

taglist: @chaelvrx @slutology00 @furioustrashlover @kelsyx33 @kooever @svnbangtansworld @xcviis @snuglymalicioussea @nellbyy @minewlove @l4yl44 @captainengineer-trixie @cristy-101 @fangirl-coco-goddess @lachesismoonmist @angelfuzzy2 @levisnumber1 @angelsdecalcomania @magicalnachocreator @hynjamkook @koodollylvr @withmuchluv-tannie @istarag @elmarimochi9513 @wtfanu @kooklv @endlesslysassy @tatamicc @armybomb-infires @jiniminisworld @seokjinthescientist @gyeomibearr @xmiaacxio @n0chuprettykook @gizaspicebag @aaclariww @dollytingz

He clenched his jaw, muttering a curse into the mattress as he dragged himself upright. You were always like this—too cheerful, too energetic in the mornings. He never understood how anyone could function with so much fucking energy at this hour, let alone be so damn happy about it. His body moved on autopilot as he trudged into the kitchen, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

You handed him a steaming mug, that same bright smile plastered on your face—the one that seemed to melt everyone else’s hearts. And, yeah, maybe his too on some days. But not today.

"Here you go, Kookie," you said sweetly, placing the cup in his hands. "Figured you’d need an extra shot. I know you were up late last night."

Jungkook muttered a barely audible "thanks," taking the mug as he plopped down on the bar stool, eyes half-lidded with exhaustion. His mood was sour, patience wearing thin, and though you kept talking, going on about some assignment or weekend plans, his focus blurred. All he could feel was the irritation bubbling up inside of him.

And then you said it. The one phrase that tipped him right over the edge.

“You better get dressed, Kookie,” you hummed, sipping from your own drink. “It’s a beautiful day! Let's start walking so we can get some of the sunshine—"

“Can you just not for one second?” he snapped, slamming the mug down on the counter, the clank of ceramic echoing in your little flat. “Every morning, Y/N. Every fucking morning, you’re just so jolly and merry. Like, it’s annoying. I can’t take it.”

The silence that followed was instant and suffocating.

Your smile faltered, the usual brightness in your eyes dimming as his words settled over you. Jungkook watched your expression shift into shock and confusion, then into something smaller and quieter. Your shoulders slumped slightly, and without a word, you turned away, focusing on the dishes like you could disappear into them.

Jungkook cursed under his breath when he saw the hurt in your posture, his stomach twisting. He wanted to apologize, to take it back, but he didn't know how. So instead, he pushed off the stool and retreated to his room, the sound of his footsteps heavy as he left you all alone in the kitchen.

The atmosphere in your last class of the day was painfully different from the usual. You sat next to Jungkook, but the banter, the jokes, and the teasing nudges were nowhere to be found. Instead, you kept to yourself, eyes glued to your notebook, only speaking when the professor called on you. And even then, your voice was so much quieter than usual.

Jungkook kept glancing at you, each look tightening the knot of guilt in his chest. He never meant to hurt you. It wasn’t your fault—none of it was. The stress from his deadlines, the sleepless nights, the pressure from work, it was all too much, and he took it out on you. But that wasn’t fair. You had shorter deadlines, longer nights, and two fucking jobs. You never complained. You still smiled. Still hummed in the mornings. Still looked at him like he could do no wrong.

But now, you barely looked at him at all.

When class finally ended, Jungkook reached out to grab his things, intending to walk home with you, just like you always did on Fridays. But when he turned, you were already halfway out the door, your bag slung over your shoulder, disappearing before he could even catch up.

His heart sank right to his ass.

For the first time in months, you didn’t walk home together. No light footsteps beside him, no playful nudges, no laughter bubbling up between the two of you as you made your way through the streets. There were no silly word games that you always roped him into, the ones he pretended to hate but secretly looked forward to. Without you, everything felt… quiet.

Jungkook shoved his hands into his pockets, the weight of your absence gnawing at him much more than he expected. He trudged back to the apartment alone, grumbling under his breath the entire way.

Jungkook sat on the couch, phone in his hand, staring grumpily at the “seen” message on his last text. He had sent it over an hour ago.

Hey👋 Where r u? Did u still wanna get takeout for dinner?

He glanced over at the cold takeout sitting on the counter, your orange chicken untouched. His own meal was getting cold too, but he didn’t care. The apartment was far too quiet without you there, and the empty seat beside him felt heavier than usual.

He swallowed harshly, flicking through shows on the TV, finally landing on Fire Guardians. It was your thing—watching together every Friday night, a tradition of sorts. But he couldn’t bring himself to press play without you. It wouldn’t feel right.

It had been two years since you and Jungkook moved in together. You came into his life through Jimin, the first person Jungkook met at uni. And if Jimin was a ray of sunshine, you made him look like a grumpy, moody cloud. Well… like him.

Living with you had turned out to be this strange, quiet sort of heaven, though you always acted like he’d done you this huge favor by letting you move in. As if he didn’t look forward to coming home every day just to see you.

When you first moved in, the two of you tried to rotate cooking duties. He remembered you sitting there, waiting for him to tell you your cooking was awful—which, yeah, it absolutely was—but he never said a thing. You called him sweet that day, and he could still remember how those words sounded coming out of your mouth. How they made him feel. No one had ever called him that before.

Now, he did most of the cooking, while you handled the cleaning. And on the nights he was too tired, you’d order takeout. It was domestic. Stupid. Amazing.

The apartment complex wasn’t anything special, just cheaper than dorms and close to campus. That was the whole deal—you guys were saving for something better, something bigger. You were studying to be an elementary school teacher, and he knew you were going to be the fucking best. Meanwhile, Jungkook was racking up his hours and experience as an apprentice at Modify, a tattoo parlor in the city.

The plan was simple. You’d both graduate, find a nice place close to the school you land a job at, and he’d find a parlor nearby. Easy.

Jungkook had never been good at making friends—he knew that. He could count the people in his circle on one hand and still have fingers left. It wasn’t a mystery to him why that was. People didn’t get close because he didn’t let them. He knew the way he came accross; closed off, intimidating. But somehow you managed to slip right past all of that. 

You, however, were the complete fucking opposite. Everyone knew you. Everyone loved you. It didn’t matter where you were, whether it was in class or working at the cafe, people just naturally gravitated toward you. You had this way of making everyone feel welcome, included. You were bubbly, outgoing, could strike up a conversation with anybody. 

Jungkook had seen it a million times—how you could light up a room just by walking in. How you could talk to anyone, about anything, and leave them feeling like they’d known you forever.

But despite all of that, despite the swarm of friends, classmates that circled around you like moths to a flame, you always found your way back to him.

Jungkook didn’t understand it, not at first. You had everyone, you could be anywhere. But somehow, no matter where you went or who was pulling for your attention, you always came back to him. Even if it was just the two of you sitting quietly on the couch, sharing space without needing to fill it with words, you chose him.

He noticed it most when he’d get home late from the parlor. Sometimes he’d come through the door, expecting you to be out with friends, but you’d be there. Always. Maybe sitting cross-legged in his hoodie, scrolling through your phone or reading some article for school. Or curled up in a fluffy blanket, waiting for him to come home so you could say goodnight to him properly before finally crashing out on your own bed.

Maybe it was just your thing. Maybe you made everyone feel like they mattered, like they were important. But there was something different about the way you looked at him. The way you lit up when he came home, no matter how late or tired he was. The way you’d call him at the most random times just to ask what he wanted for dinner, if he needed anything.

It wasn’t the same with anyone else.

Or… at least he hoped it wasn’t.

Just as Jungkook was about to send another text, the door creaked open. His head snapped up, maybe a little too eagerly.

“Hey,” he greeted, his voice soft, cautious.

You offered him a small smile, one that didn’t reach your eyes, before heading toward your room. That was not your smile. Nowhere near it.

God, he's such an asshole.

“Angel, um, wait, please,” he called out, pushing himself off the couch. His tone shifted, softer now. Vulnerable. “I’m sorry. About this morning. I was just—”

“It’s okay,” you cut him off, turning back to him with a polite, small smile. “You don’t have to explain anything to me, Jungkook. Um, I’m actually going out tonight, so…”

You trailed off, your eyes flickering past him toward the untouched takeout on the counter. His heart dropped at the sight of your lip gloss smudged slightly on your bottom lip, the way your eyes barely lingered on him, how you used his full name instead of your usual nickname.

“Oh,” he mumbled, his throat tightening. “Okay. To Tae’s party?”

You nodded quietly, turning back toward your room. Jungkook swallowed, trying to steady his voice.

“I thought we weren’t going to that tonight?” He couldn't stop the disappointment from bleeding through his words. “The new episode of Fire Guardians is out…”

“You can watch it without me,” you said softly, disappearing into your room before he could even think of a response.

Jungkook stood there, staring at the door as it clicked shut.

Watch it without you? As fucking if. He would never.

But then again… he was also “never going to snap at you,” right?

He swallowed hard, running a hand through his hair, jaw clenched so tight it almost hurt. He lingered by your door for a moment. Then, with a low groan, he turned on his heel and made his way back to his room to get ready for Taehyung's party.

The soft sound of IU playing from your phone on the other side of the wall made his fist clench around the shirt in his drawer. That was your sad music.

God, he could fucking spew.

“Kook!” Taehyung greeted with his big, toothy grin, pulling Jungkook into a bro hug. “Good to see you, man! Thought you weren’t coming tonight?”

Jungkook shrugged, forcing a smile for his friend before glancing around the packed floor of Taehyung’s penthouse. The Kims were loaded, and this wasn’t even the most extravagant party Tae had thrown, but it still must have cost a few grand. Jungkook barely registered the lavish surroundings, his mind very much elsewhere.

“Change of plans,” Jungkook muttered, eyes scanning the crowd. “Have you seen—”

“Y/N?” Taehyung finished for him, a knowing laugh escaping as he shoved an unopened beer into Jungkook’s hand. He pointed toward the living room. “Yeah, man, she’s over there, with, uh…”

Jungkook didn’t hear much after that. His gaze locked on you sitting on the couch, leaning against Jisung. Your ex-boyfriend.

Taehyung must’ve seen the way Jungkook’s expression shifted because he didn’t say anything else, just threw an arm around the younger boy's shoulders and steered him toward the lounge.

As they got closer, you glanced up, blinking in surprise when you saw Jungkook. Your body stiffened slightly, and you sat up a little from where you had been resting against Jisung. Your ex, who had been mid-conversation with his friend Minho, glanced down at you when he sensed the change in your demeanour.

“You good, babe?” he asked quietly.

Jungkook’s jaw clenched. He dropped onto the free couch next to Taehyung, twisting the cap off his beer with more force than necessary, eyes narrowing as he stared into nothing.

You nodded at Jisung as you ignored the pet name, but the discomfort in your chest was not as easy to push aside.

You knew how much Jungkook disliked Jisung. He had been there when you were a sobbing mess after Jisung broke up with you, picking up the pieces when you couldn’t even function. And now here you were, sitting under Jisung’s arm like nothing had happened. You couldn’t stop the guilt from swirling in your stomach, couldn’t stop imagining what Jungkook must be thinking.

But you tried not to dwell on it too long. After all, you were just an annoyance to him, right? He didn't explicitly say it, but you know you. Always hovering, always seeking him out, always needing something. Maybe you were doing him a favor by being here with Jisung. If you got back together with him like he had been begging you to, maybe you’d finally give Jungkook the space he seemed to need. Maybe you wouldn’t be so clingy anymore. Maybe, eventually, you’d move in with Jisung, and Jungkook wouldn’t have to deal with you at all.

Jungkook’s gaze, however, was already dragging over your outfit. That little black skirt—the one that always made your ass look so fucking good. Enough of your thighs were showing that he could easily imagine sinking his teeth into the soft, warm flesh. His head tilted a little as his eyes trailed up to the slightly cropped flowery top you wore, rising just enough to reveal a sliver of your stomach. Jungkook watched Jisung’s fingers trace mindlessly at the strip of bare skin, and his grip tightened around the beer bottle as he took a long drink, forcing his gaze to shift to the floor.

It was infuriating. He didn’t know who he was fucking angier at. You, for sitting there with Jisung like it was fucking nothing, or himself, for caring about something that shouldn’t even be his problem.

Your eyes met his for just a second, and for a brief moment, Jungkook saw the sadness there. He wanted to go over, to ask if you were really okay, but instead, he looked away, taking another swig from his beer. You pressed yourself further into Jisung’s side, retreating into your own hurt.

Jungkook’s jaw clenched tighter, his knuckles white as they gripped the neck of the bottle. And when Taehyung leaned over, blunt in hand, Jungkook didn’t hesitate. He pulled the beer away from his mouth and slipped the blunt between his lips, inhaling deeply. The familiar burn settled in his chest, a sensation he hadn’t let himself feel in a long time.

Out of the corner of your eye, you caught the movement, saw the smoke curling around him, and your heart dropped.

He had been doing so well. He was eighty four days clean. It wasn’t that you had a problem with him smoking—you didn’t, but you knew what it meant to him to stop. His family’s long, dark history with addiction weighed heavily on him, and he had promised himself he wouldn’t let the cycle continue.

“Jungkook,” you said, your voice barely audible over the music. You tried to sit up, but Jisung’s arm was draped heavily over you, pinning you in place. “Jisung, I need to sit up, please.”

You tapped his arm, but he barely reacted, too engrossed in his conversation with Minho.

Jungkook didn’t even look in your direction. He took another long drag before the first hit had even settled, his expression cold and distant. Then he grabbed another blunt and lighter from beside Taehyung, stood silently, and headed for the door.

You didn’t think. You just moved, shoving Jisung’s arm off and muttering a quick apology when he shot you a confused look. You adjusted your skirt when it had risen as you stood and hurried after Jungkook.

“Jungkook, wait, can you slow down, please?” you called, your voice straining over the music while you weaved through the crowd. For a moment, you thought he hadn’t heard you, but then he slowed, just enough for you to catch up. He didn’t turn, didn’t acknowledge you, but he held the door open as you slipped outside.

The cold night air hit you both as you walked down the stone steps in silence, the sound of the party fading behind you. When you reached the bottom and sat down, Jungkook followed suit, blunt still dangling between his fingers, the end of it flickering weakly. He puffed at it, reigniting the embers before taking another drag. He gave a low sniffle, his tinnitus acting up like it always did when he smoked.

After a long pause, you reached for the blunt, but Jungkook pulled it away, rolling his eyes as he did.

Your hand fell limply back into your lap, frowning as he took another slow hit, his eyes fixed on the empty street ahead.

“So, you can break your three-month sobriety, but I can’t have one smoke?” you asked with furrowed brows.

“Yep,” he replied, exhaling away from your face.

Your eyes narrowed at him before you mumbled, “that doesn’t seem fair."

“That sucks.” He shrugged, finishing off the blunt before stubbing it out under his shoe. Without hesitation, he started lighting the next one.

You bit down hard on your lip, trying to keep the tears at bay. “Why are you being such a jerk?” Your voice trembled slightly, and you turned away before he could see the tears welling in your eyes. “Are you really that sick of me?”

Jungkook froze, lighter still sparked in his hand. His grip tightened, the flame flickering out during the long pause. His body went rigid as your words sank in before he slowly turned to look at you.

You were sitting there, lips pressed to the side in that way you did when you were trying not to cry, and he wanted to punch himself in the fucking face.

God, he was such an asshole.

All he had done today was hurt you, push you away, and now here you were, thinking that you were a burden, that he was sick of you. 

He wasn’t sick of you.

Far fucking from it.

But how was he supposed to say that? How was he supposed to admit that the thought of losing you terrified him more than anything? That seeing you with Jisung tonight had ripped him apart. That he couldn’t stand how easily you seemed to be slipping away, falling back into old patterns that didn’t include him. That all he wanted was to take you home, put you in one of his hoodies, curl up on the couch, and watch the new episode of Fire fucking Guardians together. Eat the rest of your orange chicken because you always insisted on getting a large even though you never finished it.

But he couldn’t say any of that.

So he didn’t.

Instead, he sparked the second blunt, raising it to his lips for a long, angry drag. The silence between you stretched heavily and painful. Then he saw it—the tears finally spilling over, running freely down your cheeks.

You pulled your phone from your skirt and started swiping through the Uber app. The glow of the screen lit your face as you sniffled quietly, your fingers trembling as you clicked to confirm the ride.

Jungkook frowned, pulling the stick from his mouth, the smoke lingering in the air between you. “Y/N, please don’t cry,” he said lowly. “And don’t get an Uber… I’ll walk you home.”

“That’s okay,” you replied shakily, wiping quickly over your eyes. “I don’t want to burden you more than I already have.”

You sniffled again, the sound breaking through the quiet as you stood up. “Um, I’m just going to grab some things and stay at Jimin’s tonight. Give you some space.” You paused, hand trembling as you ran it under your eyes, trying to pull yourself together. “If you’re… reconsidering us living together, just let me know. I’ll apply for a dorm next semester and—”

“What?” His eyes were wide, voice sharp as he stood up. “No. Don’t-don’t fucking do that. I don’t- I’m not—” He huffed, frustration and panic mingling as the weed fogged his thoughts, making it harder for him to convey what he wanted to say.

God, he was so fucking stupid!

He hastily threw the blunt to the side, the sparks fading as it hit the ground. He closed the distance between you in two steps, hand reaching out as if he could somehow stop you from slipping away.

“Y/N, please don’t leave. I don’t know what I’d do if you moved out. Just—please.”

You looked away, the embarrassment of crying making it harder to speak. “Well, something’s changed, Kookie,” you said shakily. “I thought I just caught you at the wrong time this morning, and I know I can be a lot sometimes, but… I don’t want to stay if you’re unhappy.” Your gaze dropped to the ground as you fought to keep steady. “I don’t want this turning into resentment. I can’t have you hating me. I-I can’t.”

Jungkook’s heart shattered at the sight of you—shoulders hunched, lip trembling as you tried so hard to hide your tears. He clenched his fists, hating himself for being the reason you were standing there thinking he was unhappy. That he could ever hate you.

You took a shaky breath, running a hand through your hair as you tried to calm yourself. “I’m going to go get Taehyung so he can stay with you. You haven’t smoked in a while and your tolerance is low,” you said quietly, turning to climb back up the steps into the house.

Jungkook didn’t move. He just stood there, heart cracking, feet rooted to the ground as he watched you walk away.

Five minutes later, you were almost back at the front door, a bottle of water for Jungkook in hand. You had spoken with Taehyung, asking him to keep an eye on Jungkook for you since you were heading home. He could tell something was wrong—he'd never seen you look this sad before, and it clearly worried him. But instead of pressing you for details, he simply nodded and promised to hang with Jungkook and make sure he got home safe.

Jisung’s voice cut through your thoughts as he walked up to you. “Hey, babe, is everything okay? I made you a drink and couldn’t find you… come back to the lounge?”

You glanced up at him, swallowing back a grimace. Going back to the couch with him was the last thing you wanted right now. At that realization, guilt twisted sudden and deep in your gut. You knew you were using him, even if it hadn’t been conscious at first. But after just finally letting yourself cry for the first time today, the reason for your actions had become crystal clear.

Jisung had been surprised when you texted him after your last class, finally agreeing to meet up after months of declining his advances. You’d gone to his dorm, made out a little, but when he tried to take it further, you’d pulled away and claimed you weren’t feeling well. You had agreed to come to the party tonight, thinking maybe it would help. That maybe it would ease the ache in your chest from feeling like such a burden to the one person who mattered most to you.

What Jungkook said this morning wasn’t horrible. If anything, it was true. You were too chipper in the mornings. But you had never gotten the sense it bothered him before. If you had, you would’ve toned it down. You thought he was okay with your personality. You thought he liked it. He said he did… He was probably just lying to spare your feelings.

God, you were such an idiot.

“I’m really sorry, Jisung, I just don’t feel well tonight. Could we try another night? I’ll text you later. I just—I need to lay down for a bit.”

You watched as Jisung’s grip tightened around the glass in his hand, his expression shifting from something concerned and hopeful to something much darker.

“Do you ever get tired, Y/N?”

The question threw you. You fidgeted with the water bottle in your hands, blinking. “I- uh- what do you mean?”

“Do you ever get tired of leading guys on?” he sneered, his eyes dragging over you in a way that made your skin crawl. “Pretending you’re gonna give it up, only to leave them hanging while you run back to your depressed-ass boy toy?”

For a second, you couldn’t believe what you’d just heard. That someone you had been in a relationship with, that you had cried over losing, could say something so horrible.

“E-excuse me?” Your voice trembled slightly, but the anger flared hotter than the hurt. “First of all, I don’t lead anyone on. And second of all, Jungkook isn’t—” You stepped closer, defensiveness spiking in your gut. “Don’t talk about him like that. You don’t know anything about him.”

Jisung let out a cruel, mocking laugh, shaking his head. “Please. It’s pathetic, Y/N. The way you follow him around, waiting for him to give a shit. You really think he’s gonna be there for you? That he wants you the way you want him? Wake the fuck up.”

“Fuck you,” you spat, stepping back, the bottle trembling in your grip. Your heart pounded as you turned to leave, but Jisung’s hand shot out, grabbing your arm and pulling you back into him.

“Don’t walk away from me.”

“Let go, Jisung.” You yanked your arm, panic crawling up your spine as his grip tightened, his fingers digging into your skin.

“I’m doing you a favor,” he snarled. “You think that fucking degenerate could offer you more than I can?” He scoffed, his breath hot against your face. “Oh, please.”

Anger surged through you so hot it was blinding. Your palms pressed against his chest, and with all the strength you could muster, you shoved him so hard it even shocked yourself. Jisung stumbled back, his shoulder hitting the front door with a loud thud, and for a second, he looked startled. But then his expression darkened even further as he stepped toward you again.

You were about to throw the water bottle at him and make a run for it when the door suddenly swung open. Jungkook appeared, his eyes scanning the commotion that he heard through the door, finally landing on the sight of Jisung towering over you.

He didn’t think. He just moved.

Before you could say anything, Jungkook was lunging at Jisung, but Taehyung rushed in behind him, grabbing the back of his shirt before he could make contact.

“Kook, don’t—”

In his attempt to dodge your best friend, Jisung stumbled, his shoulder slamming into yours. Your footing slipped, and you landed hard on the floor, ass-first. A few girls who had been dancing nearby rushed over when they saw you fall.

“Y/N! Are you okay?” one of them asked, her voice full of concern as she grabbed your arm to help you up. She gasped as you winced, pulling her hand away and seeing the red marks forming on your skin. "Oh my god—"

“I’m okay,” you said quickly, shaking your head even as your voice wavered slightly. “I’m fine, really, Eunji. Thank you.”

Jungkook was there in an instant, shaking off Taehyung’s grip as he dropped to his knees beside you. His hands hovered over your thighs before settling there as his eyes scanned your face.

“Are you o—” His voice faltered, cut off as his gaze dropped to your arm, the bruises standing out starkly against your skin. His entire expression shifted, his worry morphing into something darker, something furious.

He didn’t speak, didn’t even blink before he was on his feet, turning back to Jisung with murder written all over his face.

Your phone buzzed in your hand, the Uber notification flashing across the screen

Before he could storm off, you grabbed his hand. “Jungkook, my Uber’s here,” you pleaded. "Please, let's just go. Please."

You could feel the tension in his body, every muscle coiled and ready to explode. But when you tugged at his hand again, his eyes finally met yours. For a moment, he hesitated, his gaze flicking between you and Jisung, who stood there with that smug, unbothered look that only fueled Jungkook's rage further. But after what felt like forever, he nodded stiffly and helped you to your feet, intertwining his fingers with yours as he led you toward the door.

Just as you reached the threshold, Jisung’s laugh echoed behind you.

“Yeah, go run after your little bitch, Jeon,” he sneered, his voice dripping with malice. “I get it, bro. I’d be all over that too. Tightest pussy on campus, huh?”

Welp.

Jungkook broke from your grip instantly and swung around so fast you almost didn't catch it. His fist connected with Jisung’s jaw before anyone could stop him, sending him crashing straight to the floor. 

But he didn’t stop. Jungkook dropped to his knees, landing punch after punch, his knuckles splitting as they collided with Jisung’s face, the sound of bone crunching under the force of his blows.

You stood frozen, your breath caught in your throat as you stared at Jungkook straddling your ex-boyfriend's waist, fists reeling back before surging forward again and again and again.

“Shit, Kook! That’s enough, man. You’re gonna fucking kill him.” Taehyung was back, rushing in with a few others, grabbing Jungkook by the arms and trying to pull him away. It took at least three of them to drag him off Jisung.

Jisung was still on the floor, groaning in pain, blood coating his mouth, face already beginning to swell. You just stared, unable to look away, the image of his bloodied, battered face searing itself into your mind. Your stomach twisted violently as bile rose in your throat. Damn it. You were going to be sick all over the Kims’ ten thousand dollar rug.

Jungkook was panting, his chest heaving with the adrenaline and rage still coursing through him. But when his eyes landed on you, all the fight drained from his body. His heart dropped as he saw the look on your face.

You looked so fucking terrified.

“Y/N, fuck,” he whispered, his voice raw as he broke away from Taehyung's grip. He took a slow, hesitant step toward you. “I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry. Please don’t cry. Don’t—please.”

But, of course, you were already crying, hot tears slipping down your cheeks uncontrollably. You shook your head, your voice barely audible through the sobs that wracked your chest. “C-can we please go now?”

He nodded quickly. “Of course,” he said softly, surprised you still wanted to leave with him, as he reached out to take your hand. “C’mon.”

The two of you slipped out of the house, pausing to apologize to Taehyung on your way out. Tae just shook his head, the worry in his eyes masked by a small, comforting smile. “Don’t worry about it,” he said, his voice gentle as he wrapped you in a hug. “Just get home safe. I’ve got a couple of the boys cleaning up Jisung. I’ll get an Uber to send his ass home soon.”

Your heart sank as you thought about what this might cost Jungkook—charges, money, a mark on his record that could follow him for years. It made you feel sick just thinking about it.

Jungkook must have seen the panic starting to take root in your expression because he gently squeezed your hand, pulling you toward the waiting Uber before you could spiral further into your thoughts.

“I don’t care about any of it,” he muttered under his breath as you climbed into the back seat. “Jisung’s a dirty piece of shit. He had it coming.”

He helped you settle in before climbing in beside you. As soon as the car started moving, the weight of everything hit you all at once. You leaned into Jungkook’s shoulder, your body shaking with quiet sobs as you clutched his hand in your lap. The sight of his bloody knuckles made your chest ache even more.

“I’m sorry,” you whispered, your voice muffled against his shirt. “I’m so sorry for everything.”

Jungkook wrapped his free arm around you, pulling you closer. His mouth pressed gently against the top of your head, and you felt his warm breath against your hair as he whispered, “Don’t apologize.” His lips brushed softly against you. “None of this is your fault. I’m the one who should be sorry.”

“This-this is your tattooing hand,” you whimpered, your tears slipping down your cheeks as you gently cradled his hand. “God, Kookie… I’m so sor—”

“Stop,” he cut in softly but firmly, pulling his hand away from your view before you could spiral further. “It's not your fault, and I don’t care about my hand.” He made sure not to get any blood on you as he wrapped his arm around your waist, pulling you snug against his chest. His face nuzzled into your hair, his hold on you tightening as you sniffled and leaned deeper into his warmth, your arms instinctively curling around his waist.

The rest of the ride passed in silence, the weight of the night pressing down on both of you, but Jungkook kept you close, his thumb rubbing gentle circles against your side as he held you.

When the car finally pulled up outside your apartment, you quietly pulled out your phone, making sure to tip the Uber driver 50% before you hopped out. You apologized profusely for being late, your voice soft and exhausted.

The driver barely acknowledged you, grumbling something under his breath that made Jungkook’s jaw clench in irritation. He opened his mouth, ready to snap back, but before he could, you reached back into the car and tugged him out by the hand.

“Give him one star,” Jungkook grumbled as the two of you made your way up the steps to your apartment complex.

For the first time all day, a small laugh escaped your lips. It was quiet, tired, and caught even you by surprise, but it was there. And it was enough to make Jungkook’s heart swell in his chest.

God, he missed that sound so much.

The apartment was quiet when you both finally stepped inside, closing the door on the loud night behind you. For a few moments, neither of you said anything. The silence wasn’t uncomfortable, just tired. 

“Do you need to talk, Kookie?” you asked softly.

Jungkook nodded, leaning against the counter, eyes on you as you toed off your boots and lined them up neatly by the door. You straightened his Adidas that had been knocked over, placing them neatly beside your shoes.

“Later,” he muttered, pushing himself off the counter and heading for the fridge. “Needa eat before I pass out.”

You let out a soft laugh, your shoulders relaxing as you watched him pull out the takeout containers. He hadn’t touched his food earlier, and a frown crept back upon your face. You wondered if he’d even eaten anything at all during the day. Your schedules were different most of the week, except Fridays, when you had the same last class. Normally, you'd text him about what you'd eaten and check in with each other, but today had been different. You hadn’t even responded to his text this afternoon.

Jungkook glanced at you from the corner of his eye, a small smile playing on his lips as he noticed you eyeing the food. He had the same thought—wondering if you had eaten today. Without saying anything, he warmed up both bowls in the microwave, letting the quiet fill the space between you.

As the microwave hummed, you stepped closer, gently taking his right hand in yours. The blood had dried, but his knuckles were bruising, and your chest tightened at the sight. Silent, you led him over to the sink, carefully washing the dried blood from his hand. Jungkook didn’t argue or pull away, just stood quietly as you ran the warm water over his skin.

Once the food was ready, he grabbed both containers while you grabbed some forks and napkins and followed him to the couch. You both sat down, pulling the throw blanket over your laps as you settled in.

“We’ll wait until tomorrow to watch Fire Guardians, yeah?” Jungkook mumbled between bites. “Didn’t wanna watch it without you.”

You paused, your hand hovering over the remote as his words sank in. Your eyes lit up a little, a small smile tugging at your lips. “Okay. Thank you,” you said softly, warmth spreading through your chest at the thought of him waiting for you.

You flicked through Disney Plus, finally settling on Grey’s Anatomy. You’d both seen it a hundred times, but it felt comforting in the moment, something familiar. As you sat there picking at your food and letting the soft murmur of the show fill the background, everything felt a little more normal. The chaos of the night faded, replaced with the quiet comfort of home.

Jungkook ate quietly beside you, and every time your eyes met, he offered a small, reassuring smile, as if to say, we’ll be fine. You believed him.

Once the food was gone, you snapped back into practical mode. “Okay, let’s go,” you said, grabbing his hand gently and pulling him up from the couch.

Jungkook huffed but didn’t resist as you led him to the bathroom. “I’m too tired for this,” he huffed, dragging his feet like a child. “Can we sleep, please? Do this tomorrow?”

“You’ll live, Kookie,” you mused, rolling your eyes. “Gotta patch you up before we sleep.”

He sighed, slumping down onto the toilet seat like a sulking kid, but he didn’t fight you. You stood between his legs, grabbing one of your hairties and pulling your hair into a pony before gently cradling his hand as you began to wash the cuts and bruises once more.

He could tell you were being extra careful not to hurt him, the warm water turning pink as it rinsed away the grime, but Jungkook barely noticed. He just watched you, his eyes following every movement as you worked. The scent of your soft perfume, the feel of your gentle, smaller hands on his, the way your brow furrowed cutely as you concentrated.

When you finished cleaning his hand, you pulled out the pack of bright pink band-aids from the drawer and started sticking them all over his knuckles. It was almost comical—his large hand covered in far too many tiny pink band-aids. You stepped back, chuckling at the sight.

“There. All patched up,” you said with a little snort. “Just until we go to the hospital tomorrow, Kookie... Ah, gosh, that’s so sad…”

Jungkook blinked down at his hand, then back up at you, his lips twitching. “S’ok,” he muttered, leaning forward to rest his head against your stomach. He exhaled softly, his warm breath tickling your skin as he murmured, “Tired.”

Your fingers automatically slipped into his hair, gently combing through the messy strands as you cradled his head against you. “I know,” you whispered, pressing a soft kiss to the top of his head. “Skincare, then sleep. C'mon.”

Jungkook groaned but stood up, letting you guide him to the sink. You both brushed your teeth, standing side by side, barely fitting into the small frame of the mirror of your tiny bathroom. Jungkook was taller than the vanity entirely, so his face wasn't visible in the reflection when he stood up straight. You always found that oddly cute.

When it came time to wash your faces, you pumped some of your cleanser onto your hand and offered him some. He took it, following your lead as you both washed up in silence.

As you rinsed off the soap, Jungkook’s gaze lingered on your face—peaceful, serene. Despite everything that had happened tonight, this was the most normal he’d felt all day.

He was in a trance when the words slipped out. "You're pretty."

Your hand froze mid-motion, towel now pressed to your cheek as you blinked in surprise. The corners of his mouth lifted into a soft smile at the startled look in your big eyes, and before you could say anything, he took the towel from your hands. He dried his own face before standing there, waiting for you to continue with the next step of your routine.

Your brows furrowed slightly as you processed his words, that stupid flutter in your stomach returning. Why did he say things like that if he didn’t mean them? Did he mean them?

You recovered quickly, blinking away your thoughts as you offered him a little smile, poking his stomach gently. "You're pretty too, Kookie."

Jungkook let out a quiet laugh, leaning into the counter as you grabbed your moisturizer. You pumped a bit into your hand, holding it out toward him like you always did, waiting for him to extend his hand. But instead, he simply tilted his head as he closed his eyes.

"Can you do it, please? M'tired..."

Your mouth parted in shock before you shook your head with a soft laugh. “You’re such a baby,” you teased, but yet without hesitation… your hands reached up to smooth the moisturizer over his face.

Your fingers were gentle as they glided across his skin, and Jungkook hummed in contentment, leaning into your touch. His skin was cool under your warm fingertips as you worked the moisturizer into his cheeks, his forehead, and along the line of his jaw. When his face shifted slightly beneath your hands, you gave his cheeks a playful squeeze.

"Stop moving," you mumbled softly.

His face relaxed, and you found yourself lingering on the task longer than necessary. But when you noticed that you hadn’t covered his nose properly, you whispered, “wait,” before grabbing a bit more moisturizer. You gently rubbed it into his pretty nose, your touch tender and focused.

When you were finally done, you pulled back and admired your work, a satisfied smile playing on your lips. Without thinking, you leaned down and pressed a kiss to the tip of his nose. "All done."

Jungkook’s breath hitched slightly, his throat tightening at the feeling of your lips on his skin. He swallowed hard, the touch of your kiss lingering more than it should’ve. It wasn’t unusual for you two to cuddle or exchange small kisses, usually on the forehead or the cheek. He doesn't know why the kiss on his nose felt so… intimate.

Slowly, he blinked his eyes open, watching as you moved back toward the mirror, completely unaware of the effect you had on him.

He stayed still, his eyes following every movement as you massaged the last bit of moisturizer into your own skin, your face illuminated softly under the bathroom light. A comfortable silence settled between you before he broke it.

“Thank you, Y/N.”

You looked over at him with the prettiest smile—the real one, not the small, fake smiles you’d been giving him all day. His heart felt full. “Of course, Kookie. I like doing your skincare. You should let me do it more often.”

You don’t need my permission to touch my face whenever you want, he thought. But in reality, said nothing of the sort.

“For everything, I mean,” Jungkook clarified, watching the way your expression shifted slightly, a confused pout forming as you washed your hands. “For dealing with my moods, for always being there for me, for being my best friend, for—”

You spun toward him so quickly, water droplets splashing from your hands. You gawked at him in surprise, and for a moment, panic fluttered in his chest. Had he said something wrong? He hadn’t meant to upset you—

“You consider me your best friend?” you gasped, voice small as tears welled up in your eyes.

Jungkook froze. “Uh, I just—I mean, yeah, well—”

“Oh, Kookie,” you sniffled, closing the distance between you in two little steps, your arms wrapping around his waist. You pressed yourself against him, and it wasn't long before he leaned down, resting his mouth against your head, his hand rubbing soothingly at the nape of your neck. “You’ve never said that before. I’m so happy.”

“Oh,” he mumbled. “Sorry. I thought you knew.”

You tilted your head up to look at him, chin resting on his chest, your eyes still glossy but now with the brightest smile on your face. “Of course I knew, you treat me so well,” you said, your voice gentle. “I just didn’t want to say it out loud in case I scared you off or something...” You let out a small chuckle, your fingers gently squeezing his sides. “You’re my best friend too. I love you.”

Jungkook’s throat tightened. “I love you more,” he whispered as he glanced down at your face—your gorgeous, soft, perfect fucking face. His hand slid up to press your face back against his chest before he did something stupid.

His lips rested back on your hair, and he stayed there for a quiet moment, just taking in the warmth of you. 

Oh, fuck it.

“You love me more than Jimin?”

You giggled into his shirt, your fingers squeezing around his waist teasingly. “I love you more than anyone in the world. Surely you know that.”

His heart soared at your words, bottom lip rolling between his teeth.

He couldn't help himself, okay... "And you're going to live with me forever?"

You glanced back up at him, confused at first, but then smiling at his almost shy question. He pulled back just enough to see your face properly, his thumb gently brushing away the lingering tear tracks from your puffy cheeks. He even swiped under your nose, ridding the moisture there too.

“If you still want me to,” you answered quietly, your voice soft and full of uncertainty.

Jungkook’s chest tightened at the doubt in your tone. How could you even question that? How could the most beautiful, sweet, intelligent girl he's ever met in his life ever feel unwanted?

Hmm… maybe because you made her feel like that, you fucking idiot—

Jungkook cupped your face in his hands, his thumbs rubbing gentle circles on your cheeks. “I was in such a bad mood this morning, Y/N. I’m so sorry I took it out on you—”

But you shook your head, your hand rubbing up and down one of his arms soothingly. “You’re stressed, I understand now—”

He huffed, his brows pulling together in frustration. “Don’t do that. Don’t make excuses for me being an asshole. You always do that.”

Your lips formed a little pout, and his heart ached at how easily you forgave him. “I did not fucking mean anything of that shit. You are not annoying. You are not too cheerful. You are fucking perfect,” he said, his voice full of raw honesty. “I’m the one who’s fucking impossible in the mornings, but you never say anything… I just—”

Jungkook sighed, brushing his thumb over your cheek again, as if reassuring himself that you were still there. “It will never happen again, Y/N, I promise. If I’m ever in a mood like that again, I’ll just stay in my room and lock the door so I don’t do anything to upset you.” He shrugged, eyes tracing over your face. “Simple.”

A small laugh bubbled from your lips as you reached up to hold his wrists gently. “You’re so ridiculous, Kookie.”

After finishing up in the bathroom, you and Jungkook made your way to your rooms to change into pajamas. You slipped into your usual sleep shorts and t-shirt, rubbing at your tired eyes as you padded back into the hallway to say goodnight to your best friend.

Jungkook appeared from his room at the same time, wearing loose sweats and a black tee, his hair still damp from washing up. He lingered in the doorway for a moment, his hand gripping the frame as he hesitated before speaking.

“Uh… can I… can I sleep in your room tonight?” His voice was soft, so shy and your heart clenched. What a cutie.

“Yes,” you beamed, grabbing his non-bandaged hand and tugging him with you into your room.

You crawled under your blanket as Jungkook slid in beside you, his larger frame making the bed dip as he settled in, pulling the covers up over you both. You curled up next to him, your head sinking into the pillow as your eyes adjusted to the dim light, tracing the faint lines of his pretty face.

“Goodnight, Kookie,” you mumbled, your voice heavy with sleep as your eyes fluttered closed.

There was a quiet shuffling beside you, the bed shifting slightly before his soft voice broke the silence. “Goodnight, angel.”

You barely registered the brush of his lips against the top of your head before you were fully drifting, his warmth lulling you into a peaceful sleep.

Jungkook lay there for a moment longer, his head sinking into your pillow as he exhaled deeply. The smell of you enveloped him, and for the first time all day, he felt his body relax completely, slipping into the easiest sleep he’s had in weeks.

The tears you’ve been holding back spill before you can stop them. Your throat burns, but no words come, only the sound of your breathing—uneven, desperate.

Jungkook shakes his head slowly, the motion small but heavy with disbelief. “You could’ve come to me. You always come to me,” he says, his voice breaking in the middle, quiet like he’s saying it more to himself than to you. His hand curls into a fist against the desk, knuckles white. “Why would you go to him?”

When you don’t answer, he takes a step forward, his restraint snapping. “Why?” he says again, louder now, his tone cracking under the strain. “Why the fuck would you go behind my back to him?”

You flinch at the sound, your vision blurring through tears. You want to say something—anything—but your voice collapses under the weight of guilt. The words don’t exist strong enough to explain that it wasn’t betrayal, not really. It was a mistake, an impulse, a moment of weakness you’d undo a thousand times if you could.

“I swear,” you finally choke out, clutching your chest as if that might hold you together. “I didn’t know it was him, Jungkook. I didn’t. I thought it was just some indie developer—just a small project, I didn’t—”

His laughter cuts you off, sharp and disbelieving, the sound jagged enough to hurt. He drags a hand through his hair, pacing a few steps back. “That’s also prohibited!” he shouts, his voice hoarse. “You know the terms, for fuck’s sake. You wrote the terms.”

You flinch again, tears spilling freely now. The truth of it lands hard—you did write those rules, the ones about outside collaboration, about loyalty, about everything you swore you’d never compromise.

He laughs again, but this time it’s hollow, stripped of any real amusement. 

Jungkook laughs, but it’s not really laughter—it’s the kind that sounds like breaking glass, sharp and cracked at the edges. His hand gestures between you, the motion wide and aimless, like he can’t decide what part of this hurts the most.

“This,” he says, voice hoarse, his chest rising and falling too fast. “This—whatever the hell this is—was the only reason I believed in loyalty.” His eyes flash, full of disbelief that borders on despair. “In partnership. In anything that meant trust.”

You don’t want to hear it. You already know. You’ve known it since the moment he turned around with that expression, since you saw the photo on his screen.

“You, Y/N,” he goes on, laughing again, the sound hollow and hysterical. “You were the only person I could trust my life with. My company. Everything. Fuck, I always said our company, didn’t I?”

You squeeze your eyes shut, unable to bear the way he says it—all past tense, like the ending’s already written.

“Jungkook,” you whisper, “please, just—listen—”

But he cuts you off, his voice rough and shaking. “I thought you knew,” he says, the words unraveling faster now, as if they’ve been waiting to spill out for years. “I thought you knew how much I—”

He stops. The silence between you pulses, raw and dangerous. He swallows hard, eyes flickering like he’s caught between anger and something softer he doesn’t want to show. Then he moves. Two strides and he’s in front of you, his hands gripping your shoulders, not harsh but firm enough to make you look at him.

“Tell me,” he demands, his voice low, trembling with disbelief. “Tell me why you ever even considered anything. Why you needed to.”

Your lip trembles, words catching on the edge of a sob. “I wanted—” you start, your voice breaking. “I thought I wanted the creative position, Jungkook. I told you that. I wanted to try again, to—”

His face changes for a second—something flickers there, something pained—but it vanishes as quickly as it comes. His grip tightens, his voice turns flat again, cold enough to sting.

“I can’t believe this,” he says quietly, and somehow that hurts more than the shouting. “I was ready to give you part of the company, Y/N. A stake. Real power. And you threw it away for a glimpse of something smaller.” His jaw locks, and then, softer, almost a whisper—“You went behind my back for that.”

The words tear through you like a blade. Your chest caves in, the guilt swelling until it feels impossible to breathe. You try to speak, to say his name again, but the only thing that comes out is a strangled sound, half sob, half apology.

And when the first tear hits your palm, you realize you’re not crying for the mistake anymore—you’re crying for the way he’s looking at you now. Like he doesn’t know you at all.

Jungkook exhales, the sound sharp, like he’s been holding his breath too long. Then he turns away, running a hand over his face as if to wipe the entire moment clean. His jaw tightens, his shoulders rising with the effort to contain something that’s long past being containable.

“Jungkook,” you whisper, your voice small, breaking under its own weight. “Is this… is this it? Can I go?”

He stops mid-step, his back still to you. For a moment, there’s only the hum of the city outside and the faint buzz of the office lights above. When he turns, your breath catches. His eyes are wet. Not red, not swollen—just shining with the kind of restraint that hurts to look at.

It’s the final crack in you.

“I don’t care,” he says suddenly, his voice rough but steady. “You’re still the only person I can trust to lead the U.S. expansion. You built it. You understand it better than anyone.” He swallows hard, the muscle in his jaw twitching. “So don’t think you can get rid of Golden Gaming that easily.”

You stare at him, disbelief spilling into desperation. “Jungkook, I would never—” you start, voice trembling, but he cuts you off with a quiet, broken laugh that doesn’t reach his eyes.

“But this—” he gestures between you, the air trembling with the weight of everything that used to exist there “—this is never happening again.”

The words hang like smoke, burning slow and cold as they sink in.

And then he’s gone.

He doesn’t slam the door or say anything else. He just leaves, the echo of his footsteps fading down the hallway until there’s nothing left but silence.

You stand there for a second, numb, until your knees give out and you sink to the floor. The leather couch behind you still smells like him. The air still carries the ghost of his touch. And all you can think, through the blur of tears, is that he didn’t fire you.

People have been thrown out of Golden Gaming for far less. He’s ruined partnerships, cut ties, rewritten futures over smaller mistakes. But with you—he made an exception. Like always.

You press your palm to the floor, the cold seeping into your skin, the tears falling faster now. He didn’t take your job. He didn’t take your title.

He just took himself.

***

Weeks pass in a haze of late nights and fluorescent light. You stop keeping track of time somewhere between the fifth and the fiftieth report, between the endless video calls, the investor meetings, the numbers that start to blur into a single pulse.

You execute the U.S. expansion like a machine—precise, efficient, flawless. Every projection is sharper than expected, every presentation approved without revision. On paper, you’re brilliant. In reality, you’re dissolving.

The silence between you and Jungkook stretches like glass—transparent, fragile, impossible to touch without cutting yourself. He doesn’t avoid you, not exactly. He still calls you into meetings, still responds to every message with curt precision, still trusts your judgment in every major decision. But that’s all it is now—judgment. Work. Function.

His voice reaches you only through email threads and board calls, stripped of everything that once made it human. Good work, Y/N. Send the figures by morning. Schedule a sync with the LA team. Each line feels like a blade disguised as praise.

You bury yourself in tasks until your days blur into each other. You sleep on the office couch more often than your own bed, keep a toothbrush in the drawer, a change of clothes folded in the cabinet. You convince yourself it’s practical, but it’s penance. Every unchecked box is another heartbeat of silence you can’t bear.

The team starts calling you a legend. They whisper that you never stop working, that you’re the only one who can keep up with the CEO. You almost laugh when you hear it—because they don’t know that keeping up with him is the only way to keep breathing.

Sometimes you catch glimpses of him in the halls—pressed suit, calm eyes, phone at his ear—and it feels like being haunted by something that’s still alive. You want to speak, to ask if he’s eating, sleeping, thinking, but your throat closes every time.

So you nod when he passes. You say “Understood” in meetings. You keep your head down and your work perfect. Because if perfection can’t fix this, nothing can.

The silence grows heavier with each success, the space between you filled not with failure but with everything you’re too afraid to say.

***

You find out he wants to see you only through a calendar notification—no message, no preface, just a time and a subject line: Review: U.S. Expansion Strategy Deck. The simplicity of it feels cruel.

You arrive at his office exactly on time, file in hand, pulse steady only because you’ve trained it to be. Jungkook stands by the window, the skyline bleeding light around him, his reflection a sharp outline against the glass. He turns when you knock, his expression unreadable.

“Sit,” he says.

You do. He doesn’t look at you at first, just flips through the printed slides you left on his desk. The silence stretches until it becomes something physical—something alive and waiting to snap.

When he finally speaks, his voice is smooth, distant. “Good numbers. Better than projected.”

You nod. “Thank you.”

Another pause. Then, lightly—too lightly—you ask, “How are you managing without an assistant now?”

His gaze flicks up, brief and sharp. “Could’ve been worse,” he says, the corner of his mouth twitching with something that might almost be humor. “Though I haven’t seen the bottom of my inbox in weeks.”

You try to smile, but it doesn’t reach your eyes. “Maybe you should consider hiring someone.”

“Maybe,” he says, still watching you. “But I doubt anyone else could handle it.”

It lands heavier than either of you expects. You look away first, pretending to fix a page that doesn’t need fixing. He exhales, the sound small but frayed, and leans back in his chair.

“Do you ever sleep?” he asks suddenly.

“Sometimes,” you answer, a dry laugh slipping through. “It’s a hobby.”

His eyes narrow just slightly, like he’s studying you too closely. “You look exhausted.”

“So do you.”

He huffs a quiet laugh, but there’s no amusement in it. “That makes sense,” he says. “We’re both paying for something we didn’t mean to break.”

You glance up, startled, but he’s already looking back at the papers, pretending he didn’t just say that. The smell of his cologne lingers faintly in the air—familiar, almost too intimate—and it disorients you.

You lean forward to point out a section on the report, and he goes still. It takes you a second to realize why. He’s close enough to catch the faint trace of your perfume, the one he used to say stayed on his hands long after you left his office. His breath hitches before he masks it.

“What scent is that?” he asks, the question deceptively casual.

You hesitate. “Same one,” you say softly. “Always been the same.”

Something in him falters. His hand clenches against the edge of the table. “You shouldn’t wear it here.”

Your eyes lift to his. “Why?”

His voice drops lower, rougher. “Because it makes it hard to think.”

The silence that follows is nothing like before. It hums, thick and charged, full of everything you’ve both been trying to suffocate.

You should stop. You know that. But the words spill out anyway. “Then maybe you shouldn’t have called me here.”

That does it.

He stands abruptly, pushing the chair back, the air between you snapping tight. “Don’t start,” he says, but his voice shakes just enough to betray him.

You rise too, matching his height, your anger sharp with longing. “You wanted me here, Jungkook. You always do. You just don’t know what to do with me once I’m close.”

He steps forward, close enough that you feel the heat of him through your blouse. “You think this is what I wanted?” he asks, voice breaking on the edge of restraint.

“You tell me,” you whisper, eyes locked on his.

For a moment, he just stares, breathing hard, his jaw tight, every muscle in his body drawn like a bowstring. Then his hand moves—fast, deliberate—slamming the folder shut between you.

“Stop talking,” he mutters.

You don’t. “You can’t keep pretending—”

“I said stop.”

The last word comes out rough, almost pleading, and before you can answer, his hand reaches for you, fingers curling around your wrist with a grip that's equal parts desperate and commanding, pulling you flush against him. 

The impact steals your breath, your bodies colliding in a rush of heat and unresolved fury. You don't pull away—instead, you surge forward, crashing your mouth onto his in a rough, devouring kiss that tastes of salt and frustration. 

His lips part under yours, tongue thrusting deep to battle yours, all teeth and hunger as he kisses you like he's punishing you for every unspoken word between you. You bite his lower lip hard enough to draw a growl from him, and he retaliates by sucking on your tongue, his free hand fisting your hair to yank your head back just enough to deepen the angle, claiming every gasp you make.

The kiss breaks only when air becomes a necessity, but neither of you stops—your hands claw at his shirt, buttons popping free as you rip it open, exposing the hard planes of his chest. 

He mirrors you, shoving your blouse off your shoulders with rough tugs, the fabric tearing slightly at the seams before he flings it across the room. His mouth descends on your neck, sucking bruises into your skin while you shove his shirt down his arms, nails scraping his shoulders as it hits the floor. 

Pants follow in a frenzy—yours unbuttoned and yanked down your hips, kicked away with your heels; his belt clatters open, zipper rasping as you both strip him bare, clothes scattering like debris from a storm. Underwear is the last to go, his cock springing free, thick and hard, while you peel yours off, the cool office air hitting your heated skin.

You drop to your knees before he can say a word, eyes locked on his as your hand wraps around his coke, stroking once, twice, feeling him throb in your palm. 

'Fuck, you think you can handle this after annoying me?' he snarls, but his hips buck forward anyway, pushing the head past your lips. 

You take him in deep, tongue swirling around the underside as you suck, hollowing your cheeks to draw a hiss from him. Saliva coats him quickly, your mouth working him with angry determination—bobbing fast, taking him to the back of your throat until you gag, but you don't stop, glaring up at him with defiance. 

'That's it, choke on my cock like the tease you are,' he grits out, hands tangling in your hair to guide you, then thrust, fucking your face with shallow pumps that make tears prick your eyes. 

Spit drips down your chin, mixing with his precum as he uses your mouth, pace turning brutal, his groans filling the room. 

'You love this, don't you? Acting all professional when you want me to wreck you.' You hum around him in response, the vibration making him curse, your hands gripping his thighs to steady yourself as he drives deeper.

He pulls out abruptly, strings of saliva connecting you, his chest heaving. 

'Up,' he demands, hauling you to your feet by your arms, crushing you against him for another fierce kiss, tasting himself on your tongue. You melt into it for a second before he spins you around, bending you over the desk with a hand between your shoulder blades. Your palms slap the wood, ass presented as he kicks your legs wider, his body crowding yours from behind. 

'Look at you, soaked already from sucking me off,' he mutters, voice thick with rage and lust, one hand sliding between your thighs to feel your dripping pussy. He spits directly onto your folds, the warm glob mixing with your arousal, rubbing it in with his fingers before lining up his cock. 'You drive me insane, coming here just to torture me like this.'

You push back against him, desperate. 'Then stop holding back and fuck me already, you bastard—show me how much you hate pretending you don't need this.' 

He slams in with one hard thrust, burying himself to the hilt in your tight heat, the stretch burning deliciously as you cry out. No easing in—he pulls back and pounds forward again, setting a punishing rhythm that shakes the desk, his hips snapping against your ass with wet smacks. 

'This what you want? Me owning this pussy because you can't stay away?' he growls, one hand reaching around to grab your tit, squeezing the soft flesh roughly, thumb flicking your nipple until it aches. His other arm bands across your chest, pulling you upright against him so he can latch onto your neck, teeth grazing and lips sucking marks that will linger for days.

You moan loudly, the sounds echoing off the glass walls, body arching into every brutal drive of his cock. 

'Yes—harder, fuck,' you gasp, clenching around him deliberately, drawing a ragged curse from his lips. 

He retaliates by pinching your nipple sharply, hips grinding deeper, the angle hitting that spot inside you that makes stars burst behind your eyes. 

'Begging already? Poor thing — but you're mine to ruin, always have been.' 

His free hand snakes down, fingers finding your clit, circling the swollen nub with firm pressure that has you trembling, moans turning to whimpers as the pleasure coils tight.

The build is furious, your bodies slick with sweat, breaths coming in harsh pants as he fucks you relentlessly, cock dragging along your walls with every thrust. 

'Come on my dick, show me how much you hate me for making you feel this good,' he demands against your ear, fingers rubbing faster, pinching your clit just right. 

It shatters you—orgasm crashing over you in waves, pussy spasming around him as you scream his name, walls milking him tight. He follows seconds later, burying deep with a final, savage thrust, cock pulsing as he spills inside you, hot cum flooding your core. You both collapse forward onto the desk, his weight pinning you down, breaths ragged and mingled, the anger dissolving into exhausted, sated silence as the city lights flicker beyond the window.

Jungkook reaches for you first. The silence that follows feels softer now, a little fragile, threaded with the kind of tenderness neither of you knows what to do with. He offers his hand and helps you up, his touch still unsteady, and you both move quietly through the mess of papers and half-open folders. The two of you straighten your clothes without speaking, the room filled only with the small sounds of fabric and breath.

It’s strange—after all the sharpness, the shouting, the heat—this quiet feels intimate in a different way. He buttons his shirt, eyes flicking toward you once, then away again. You smooth your skirt, feeling his gaze even when you can’t see it. You’ve imagined this before, dreamed of what it would feel like to touch him again, to be this close. But now that it’s real, you don’t know where to go from here.

You’re about to collect your notes when you feel him behind you, his breath brushing the back of your neck. “You work too diligently,” he murmurs, voice low, almost teasing, “for someone who claims to hate this position.”

You turn, heart tripping. “Golden Gaming isn’t just one position,” you say quietly. “It’s ours. Our dream, our goal. It’s only natural to take responsibility for the hard parts too—the things that don’t always make you happy.”

He studies you for a long moment, his hand lifting to trace the line of your cheek. The gesture is careful, almost reverent. “I was selfish,” he says finally, the words heavy with truth. “I still am. You devoted yourself to me, and when you finally asked for one thing—” He huffs out a small laugh, eyes glinting. “—it wasn’t even me.”

Heat blooms in your face, and you look away, embarrassed. He chuckles softly, shaking his head. “You just wanted to do what you love. And I got angry like a child.”

You don’t know how to respond. There’s too much inside you—gratitude, relief, something that might be love if you let yourself name it. So you say what you can. “I’ll finish the expansion,” you tell him. “I’ll make sure it launches cleanly, and once it’s stable, I’ll find someone better to take over the role.”

He tilts his head, smiling faintly. “Better than my Y/N?”

You can’t help the laugh that escapes you. “Then after that,” you say, trying to sound lighter, “you can decide what happens to me here.”

He steps closer, his hand rising again to cup your cheek, thumb brushing just below your lip. “I already know what happens to you tomorrow night,” he says, voice dipping lower. “You’re going on a date. With me.”

You arch a brow, trying not to smile. “Jeon Jungkook on a date? Haven’t heard of that in five years.”

He grins, dimples flashing for the first time in what feels like forever. “Yeah,” he says, tone warm, almost boyish. “Guess that’s on me for being too slow.”

a/n – I'm nervous about this, I didn't expect the index/teaser to get as much hype as it did, omg – thank you for that ♡ but before you read, I just want to mention that this first part is a bit of a slow burn. There's quite a lot of other details, and it isn't just based on y/n doing the kiss trend on Jungkook ... Also, there isn't smut in this part, but things will get tense in the parts 🧚

You've just gotten home at 7:30PM and the weight of the day has just gotten to you. Your shoulders are aching, your feet are sore and your head is throbbing.

You've been working hard at your marketing job for the past year, pouring your heart and soul into it. But your body is begging for a break.

Since the beginning of the day, you've been dreaming of a hot shower and the relaxation your couch can bring you, so you're over the moon to finally be in the comfort of your little home.

Your phone's been kept in your bag on silent and you haven't touched it all day – Not by choice, but because work did not give you a single chance.

There had been absolutely no time for scrolling, no time for the group chats with your friends and definitely no time for the one person who always lights up your screen with multiple notifications.

Jungkook.

He's your best friend of four years. The guy who stumbled into your life through a mutual friend. He was more on the nonchalant side at first, but after a while he warmed up to you.The two of you clicked instantly – two peas in a pod. You two laugh over the same silly memes, share playlists and text each other about everything and nothing from dusk til dawn.

Your friends are convinced that there's definitely something going on between you two – since you're literally each other's soulmates. You insist that you and Jungkook are just friends. Best friends. Nothing more.

Jungkook's a graphic designer, he works at a studio downtown. And somehow, despite your packed schedules, you always find time for each other – Like a lot of time. Sometimes it's coffee at 6am before work, late-night food dates and even random video calls at 2am.

But Jungkook isn't so sure sometimes. He'll never say it out loud, not to anyone and definitely not to you. But there's a stubborn part of his heart that beats a little faster when you're with him.

It's not a big crush and nothing too dramatic. It's some tiny spark... A small what if? He keeps it buried though, because you're his rock, his safe place and he'd rather die than risk screwing that up. So he plays the part : Your funny, loyal and sometimes annoying best friend.

After a while, you make your way to the bathroom, taking off your work clothes and tossing them into the laundry basket. You stand under the spray for a really long time, letting the hot water wash over you.

When you finally step out, wrapped in a towel you feel clean and satisfied. In the bedroom, you pull on your comfiest oversized hoodie (stolen from Jungkook, of course), and a pair of sweatpants.

The moment you pick it up, your heart does a little flip.

Eighteen missed calls and forty-two new messages. All from Jungkook.

"Oh, crap." you whisper, unlocking your phone to scroll through some of them.

Jungkook [4:12pm] : yo where r u?? U dead??

Jungkook [4:15pm]: Y/N istg if u don't answer I'm calling the cops.

Jungkook [4:20pm] okay fine I'm being dramatic but ANSWER ME.

Jungkook [4:30] : *sent a meme of a sad puppy* This is me when u ignore me btw.

Jungkook [5:45pm] : I'm gonna spam u till u reply.

Jungkook [5:46pm] : beep

Jungkook [5:46pm] : boop

Jungkook [5:47pm] : BEEP BOOP

The calls started around 6pm. You can't help but laugh, your tiredness melting into a warm feeling in your chest.

You feel a little guilty and you miss him, so you tap his name and hit call, flopping onto your bed as the line rings. He picks up on the first ring.

"Y/N!" His voice is mixed with relief and mock outrage. It's so loud that you have to pull your phone away from your ear. "You tryna give me a heart attack? I thought you were, like trapped under a pile of reports or something!"

You grin, rolling onto your stomach. "Wow, dramatic much? I was really busy at work. Some of us don't get to doodle pretty pictures all day."

"Doodle pretty pictures?" he gasps. "Excuse me, I'm an artist. My doodles pay my rent. What's your excuse for ghosting me?"

"I wasn't ghosting you," you say, laughing. "My boss was a tyrant today. I didn't even get a lunch break. My phone was kept away the whole time, and by the time I saw your novel of texts, I was already home."

There's a pause and then his voice softens. "Rough day huh? You sound beat up."

You sigh, resting your chin on your hand. "You have no idea. My body's aching. I'm about to melt into the couch and never move again."

"Poor baby.Want me to come over?..." You can hear the faint movement in the background. "I just got outta work actually. Studio was a mess today. I'm starving and cranky and in desperate need of my best friend's face. Maybe we can get some food?"

"Oh, so is seeing me gonna make you less cranky?"

"Hmm, always does," he says.

There's that charm of his that makes your friends swoon and insist that he's in love with you. But of course, you brush it off, like always. There's no way.

"I'll just grab takeout and head your way. You want your usual from that Thai place?"

You groan dramatically. "You're an angel. Yes, please. And get those spring rolls too."

"Done and done," he says. You hear the beep of his car unlocking. "I'll be there in like twenty. Don't fall asleep on me, loser."

"No promises," you say, but you're already sitting up. All of a sudden, some of your energy sparks back –probably from the thought of you seeing him.

"Oh, and Jungkook?"

"Yeah?"

"Sorry for worrying you. I didn't mean to go MIA."

There's silence for a short while before he speaks again. "It's okay. Just... Don't do it again, alright? I contemplated showing up at your office."

You laugh and shake your head. "But apparently, I'm the dramatic one."

"You are." he counters. "See you soon, pretty girl."

The call ends and you stare at your phone for a few seconds and a goofy smile tugs at your lips.

                     ♡━━━━━♡

There's a knock on the door twenty-three minutes later and you walk toward the door in socks.When you open the door, you're met with the sight of Jungkook and for a second, your brain short-circuits.

He looks unfairly good in casual clothes. He's wearing a black jacket that's unzipped enough to show a part of his new tattoo on his chest. His right sleeve is pushed up to his elbow, revealing some of the tattoos going up from his hand to shoulder.

"Hey, zombie," he says low and teasing. "You gonna let me in, or you just gonna stare and admire?"

You blink and heat crawls up your neck. Get it together "I was admiring the food, not you, ego monster."

"Mm-hmm." He steps inside, kicking his boots off. The scent of the takeout fills your kitchen. "Sure. Totally the food."

You shut the door and turn, only to find him closer than expected, his eyes scanning your face and  eyebrows furrowed.

"You look rough."

"Gee, thanks." you try say with a little scoff. "Long day. Long year."

Jungkook looks at the little bags under your eyes and the way you look like you're basically holding yourself together. He sets the bags down on the table and opens his arms.

"Come here."

You don't hesitate, you crash into him. Your arms loop around his waist and your face presses against him. You love how he smells, his scent is one of the most comforting things.

His chest is warm under your cheek, making you want to stay like this forever. One of his hands settle between your shoulder blades and the other cradles the back of your neck.

"You're so warm," you mumble into his shirt. "Unfair."

"You're cold," he counters, his lips near your temple. "And you're shaking. When'd you last eat?"

"... coffee counts?"

He huffs a laugh then ruffles your hair. "No, you idiot."

You two stay like this for a really long time. When you finally pull back, your hands stay on his waist for a bit too long – Jungkook notices, but doesn't say anything .

"Food," you declare, snatching the bags like a gremlin. "Mine."

Jungkook snorts. "Yes, ma'am."

The two of you migrate to the living room. You get some blankets and place the takeout on the coffee table before flopping onto the couch and stretching your legs. Jungkook takes off his jacket and tosses it over the backrest before dropping close enough beside you that his thigh presses against yours.

You find a movie and hit play. Jungkook opens the container with the spring rolls, takes a bite then holds the other half to your lips without looking. Muscle memory. You bite it, your cheeks puffing like a chipmunk and grease dribbles onto your chin.

"Classy," he says, wiping it away slowly with his thumb.

He doesn't move his hand right away, he lets it rest there as his eyes stay on you, watching you swallow.

"You're staring." you say after swallowing.

"Am not." He smirks, finally pulling back to take a forkful of some food. "Just making sure you don't choke. Liability issues."

You swat his arm but your hand stays on his bicep longer than strictly necessary. Your fingers curl around his arm , his muscles flex under your touch and you yank your hand away quickly. Jungkook's lip twitch, but again, he doesn't call you out.

You two settle into a messy rhythm : Eating straight from the containers, trading bites while watching the movie.

Somewhere along the line, your legs ended up across his lap. His hand rests on your ankle, his thumb tracing circles over the bone. It was casual and thoughtless, except nothing about the way your pulse jumps feels casual.

Halfway through, you catch him watching you instead of the screen. Not the movie, you. his expression is soft, the kind of look he usually hides behind jokes.

"What?" you ask, your voice soft.

He blinks like you've caught him stealing. "Nothing," then quietly he adds "Just glad you're okay."

You feel something complicated – the type of feeling you should definitely not be having for your best friend. You nudge his thigh with your foot. "You're such a softie."

"Only for you," he says, so easily you almost miss the weight of it.

                     ♡━━━━━♡

A few days slip by quickly. The ache from that torturous work day has faded. You've spent most of your free time with Jungkook, of course – texting every time you could, sending silly memes or tiktoks and going on random lunch dates with him.

He's crashed at your place twice this week – once after a late-night gaming session and once when his apartment's AC died on one of the hottest evenings.

It's Thursday evening now and you've just gotten home from work. It was another long day, but nothing too insane this time.

You kick off your shoes, toss your bag onto the kitchen counter and pour yourself a glass of iced tea.

Your phone buzzes with a notification from the group chat, your friends roasting each other and discussing weekend plans, but you ignore them.

Instead, you flop onto your bed and prop your laptop open on a pillow. The wedding is this Saturday – Your older sister's big day.

Nerves flutter in your stomach, it's a family gathering so you don't really know what to expect. Sure, it's going to be good but it's still going to be chaotic. Especially with your parents' endless questions about your life. *"When are you settling down?" *"Have you and that nice boy, Jungkook finally made things work yet?"* Yeah, that. But you are excited to see all of them, since it's been a really long time.

You tap the video call button on your phone, linking it to the laptop for a bigger screen. It rings twice before Jungkook's face pops up. It's grainy at first, then clears into that stupidly handsome grin.

He's in his apartment, lounging on his couch with a controller in one hand, so he's probably mid-game. His hair is tousled like he's been running his hand in it continuously – he probably has, he tends to get really worked up when he's on the game since he takes it very seriously *

"Hey, gorgeous," he says as he sets down the controller, leaning forward so his face fills the screen. "Miss me already? It's only been, what? Three hours since our call at lunch break?"

You roll your eyes but a smile forms on your lips anyway. "Please. You're the one who kept sending me stupid memes after that. Desperate for attention much?"

"Maybe." he laughs. It's deep and it kind of makes your stomach flip. "Whats up?"

You rest your chin on your hand and tilt your head. "Remember my sister's wedding? The one I've been yapping about for months?"

"Oh shit, that's this weekend? Saturday?"

"Yep. And you're coming with me, right?" You ask casually, but there's a hopeful undertone.

Your parents adore Jungkook. They have since the first time you'd brought him to a family barbecue two years ago. He somehow managed to charm them effortlessly. He'd helped your dad with the grill and whatever he needed, complimented your mother's food dishes and even joined in on all the family games and drama.

They've met him a handful of times since, and every visit ended with your mother packing him food, sending him off with the warmest hug and the sweetest words. Your dad would tell him to visit whenever he wanted to, as if he was family already.

"My parents keep asking about you. Mom's convinced you're the only reason I haven't turned into a hermit."

Jungkook's eyes soften, his eyes crinkling at the corners as he grins.

"Aww, they miss me? Tell em I'll bring the charm. And yeah, of course I'm coming. Wouldn't miss it. Plus, free cake and watching you try not to cry during the vows? Priceless."

You snort. " I don't cry at weddings. I'm stone cold."

"Liar. You teared up at that dumb movie we watched the other day."

"That was allergies!"

"Uh-huh." He leans back, stretching his arms over his head. His tank top rides up, flashing his abs. You have to avert your eyes, focusing on your iced tea instead.

"So, details. What time? Do I need to rent a tux or can I wear my suit?"

You set your glass down, pulling up the invitation on your phone to double-check.

"Ceremony's at 1pm, then we're gonna go back to my parents' place for a little family function. The wedding's at a cute venue about an hour out – you know, that place with the pretty gardens? Semi-formal, so suit's fine. No tux unless you wanna look like a penguin. "

"Penguin it is," he bluffs. "Kidding. Black suit, got it. You want me to drive?"

You hesitate for a second, then nod. "Yeah, that'd be great. My car's been making that weird noise again. Meet me here at noon?"

"Done." he pauses, studying you through the screen. "You excited? Or stressed? Your sister's been bridezilla-ing, right?"

"A bit of both," you admit, twirling a strand of hair around your finger. "Excited for her – she and her fiancé are stupid cute together. But family stuff... You know. Aunties asking when it's my turn or trying to set me up with someone." you make a funny face. "At least with you there, they'll be distracted. You're like their golden boy."

"What can I say? I'm irresistible." he chuckles. "Seriously, though. I got your back. We'll dance, eat too much and bail early if it gets too weird."

Your heart does that *annoying * thing again. "Thanks, Kook. You're the best."

"Damn right." He winks before glancing off-screen. "Hey, I gotta jump in the shower. Got a late client call. But text me if you need anything. Outfit pics, moral support? I'm your guy."

You smile at him. "Will do. Night, loser."

"Night, dork."

The call ends and you're met with the black screen. You stare at it for a while, replaying the conversation in your head.

It's a wedding and you're going with your best friend. Just friends together. No big deal...

                     ♡━━━━━♡

Friday afternoon is here and you're currently standing infront of your closet, looking for something comfortable, yet decent to wear.

The wedding is tomorrow, but tonight is the prelude. The hour-long drive to your parents' house, where mayhem awaits in the form of last-minute decorations, seating charts and your mother's endless trays of appetizers.

You pull on a pair of jeans, a tee and an oversized denim jacket (Jungkook's again, oops). You tie your hair into a ponytail and skip makeup entirely, save for the lip balm you tint on your lips - There's no point in trying to look glamorous when you'll probably be sweating majority of the time.

Your bag is already packed by the door with everything you'll need for tonight, for the wedding and for the drive back on Sunday.

You know Jungkook like the back of your hand, and that guy can eat his weight in junk food, especially on road trips. You went to the market yesterday and stacked up. You got his favourites - Chocolate, a few bags of chips, banana milk, shrimp crackers and the crown jewel : Kancho biscuits. The find your name edition.

Jungkook is obsessed with them. He's so eager to find his name on one them, he's almost like a little kid. He's turned it into his personal quest. Although, his name isn't exactly common but he still has faith.

He bought six packs last week during your grocery run. He checked each biscuit and groaned every time he found the same common names.

"One day," he'd declared, placing a biscuit into your mouth. "I will find it one day."

You laughed then, but you brought a pack today, just incase. Soon, your phone buzzes with a text from Jungkook.

Jungkook [6:12PM] : I'm outside. Brought coffee. Hurry up, slowpoke or I'll drink yours too.

You grin, slinging the bag over your shoulder and grabbing the snack bag. You lock up and jog down the stairs.

His black Hyundai idles at the curb. He spots you in the rearview and hops out to open the trunk.

"Damn, you look ready for a hike," he teases, taking your heavy bag with ease.

Jungkook's dressed casually too - wearing grey sweatpants, a black hoodie zipped halfway over a white shirt, and sneakers.

"Says the guy dressed like he's about to nap." you shoot back.

You let him take the snack bag from you as well, watching his eyes light up when he peeks inside.

"Snacks? You're a goddess."

He slings an arm around you shoulders in a quick side-hug. "I love you. Marry me."

"Buy me a ring first, cheapskate."

You get into the passenger seat, and two iced coffees wait in the cup holders - yours exactly how you like it.

Jungkook slides behind the wheel, buckles up and starts the engine. He fiddles with his Playlist before pulling into the road.

"Alright, co-pilot. Navigate the way. And pass the goods."

You laugh, digging into the bag at your feet. "Patience, frog."

You open a bag of chips and hand him a chip before putting one into your mouth...

The two of you fall into easy chatter as he drives onto the freeway. Jungkook drives with one hand on the hand, the other gesturing wildly or taking chips from the bag.

Halfway through the drive , you pull out the Kancho pack. "Ta-daa."

His eyes widen, flicking between the road and the biscuits like a kid. "The name ones! You legend!"

He makes grabby hands but you hold the package back teasingly.

"Eyes on the road, you maniac. I'll feed you."

You tear the packet open, the sweet, chocolate scent blooms in the car. You take one of the little, round balls out and it's engraved with "Jimin" you hold it up. "Nope."

He leans over, careful not to swerve and you drop it into his mouth. "Next!" Jungkook calls out.

You two pretty much turn it into a game. You inspect each one, reading the tiny Hangul writings. You read each of the names and when you find out that they aren't Jungkook's, you feed them to him. He eats the chocolate-filled biscuits and licks his lips.

A smear of chocolate and crumbs lingers at the corner of his mouth, without thinking, you reach over to wipe it with your thumb. His eyes dart to you, surprised then they soften. Your touch lingers for a bit too long.

"You're such a messy eater," you mutter to which he smirks, unfazed.

You go through all the biscuits, but unfortunately none of them have his name.

"Argh!" he grumbles when the last one is some random name, but he makes you feed it to him anyway.

The GPS soon signals that you're close to your parents' house. Soon enough, the house comes into view and Jungkook pulls into the driveway. He parks before killing off the engine, then he turns to you.

"Ready?"

You nod and unbuckle your belt.

The moment the front door opens, you're exposed to how noisy it is inside.

Your mom is at the door, wearing an apron messed with flour. She opens her arms.

"Y/N! Jungkook!" she squeals. "Finally! My babies are home!"

Before the two of you can even drop your bags, she pulls Jungkook into a bone-crushing hug, rocking him side to side. His bag slides off his shoulder and falls to the floor.

"Mom, you're choking him," you laugh, but your mother's grip on him tightens.

"Look at this handsome boy! Have you gotten more tattoos?! Eat more, you're still too skinny," she pinches his cheek before turning to you with equal fervour. "And you, still not eating enough too. Come, come, I cooked so much!"

Jungkook, whose cheeks are still pink from the assault, manages a sheepish grin.

"Hi, mom. Missed you too." he says.

The word *mom* rolls off his tongue so naturally that your dad, who's emerging from the hallway does a double take.

"Jungkook!" he beams, clapping Jungkook's back hard enough to make him stumble. "Good, you're here. I need muscle. The tent poles are fighting me."

You choke on air. "Dad–"

Jungkook just laughs, rubbing the spot between his shoulder blades. "Happy to help, lead the way."

Inside, the house is disastrous. The living room looks like a tornado hit it. From the kitchen, you can hear aggressive cutting of a knife on a cutting board and your sister's angry voice.

"NO, the flowers go on the left side of the arch, not the right! MOM, tell them!"

Your six year old niece, Hana with her cute pigtails bouncing, comes barrelling between your legs, nearly toppling you over.

"Auntie Y/N! Look, I'm a princess!" she twirls, her fairy wings are askew and glitter smeared across one of her cheeks.

Two seconds later, her three-year old brother Jaden runs past in nothing but a Spider-man underwear and a cape, like some cartoon character.

"I'M BATMAN!" he shouts before launching himself at Jungkook's legs.

"Uncle Kookie! Pick me up! Up high, higher than the ceiling!"

Jungkook doesn't hesitate, he lifts the kid onto his shoulders like he weighs nothing. Jaden's sticky fingers tangle in Jungkook's hair.

"Higher than the ceiling? That's a big order, little man."

Your sister, Lara storms in from the dining room. She spots you and Jungkook and lets out a dramatic wail.

"Thank God. Y/N, the calligrapher spelt something wrong on twenty place cards. TWENTY! And Jungkook –" she scans him. "You're quite tall. Can you reach the top of the arch. The florist keeps dropping petals and I'm one sneeze way from a breakdown."

Jungkook, who's still balancing Jaden, salutes with one hand.

"On it."

Lara's eyes soften instantly. "You're the only competent person in this house. Marry my sister so I can keep you forever."

You groan. "Lara, stop."

But your mom is already nodding vigorously, wiping her hands on her apron. "Exactly! Jungkook come taste the food. Tell me if it needs more salt."

Jungkook shoots you a helpless look, as he's dragged toward the kitchen with Jaden still perched on his shoulders like a triumphant gargoyle.

Later, when the tent is finally upright and decorated, the kids start playing games in the backyard.

Hana appoints Jungkook as the DJ, and shoves her mother's phone into his hand. He scrolls through Spotify with one hand, the other steadying Jaden, who is now asleep against his chest.

You lean against the doorframe, watching the scene before you. Jungkook looks so domestic like this, the gentle way he sways your nephew to keep him comfortable. You find your smiling at him.

ungkook glances up then, catching your eyes across the yard. He smiles back at you, a gentle smile that's only meant for you. He mouths "you okay?"  to which you nod with a fuzzy feeling in your chest.

                      ♡━━━━━♡

It's finally Saturday –the big day. The house is buzzing with a mix of excitement and anxiety.

The house smells of breakfast, coffee and the floral perfume of lilac bouquets scattered everywhere – lilac is the wedding's theme colour, chosen by Lara for the romantic and dreamy vibe. The bridesmaids' dresses also vary in shades of soft lilac.

The backyard tent from last night now looks like a cute fairy-tale pavilion, it's all ready for the function after the wedding ceremony.

Downstairs, the family is in full swing. Your dad paces the kitchen in his fancy suit, practicing his father of the bride speech and his walk down the aisle. It's so wholesome to see him getting all emotional while he practises.

Your mom is panicking a little, adjusting centerpieces and double-checking everything like a madwoman. Your cousins wrangle up the kids, who are already hyped on pre-wedding sugar rushes, they all look so cute in their little dresses and suits.

Everyone is dressed and ready, or atleast close to it – except for the bride. Upstairs, in her old bedroom, Lara is a dress in her beautiful, poofy gown, but far from composed.

She can't believe she's finally marrying the man of her dreams – Jay. She sniffles, her voice super emotional as she keeps second-guessing herself. Luckily, she's got the other bridesmaids there to console her.

Meanwhile, in your old bedroom down the hall, you're putting the finishing touches on your own look. As one of the bridesmaids, your dress is a floor-length lilac  dress, that's strapless and cinched at the waist. The fabric sparkles a bit in the light, it's elegant and ethereal – complementing the theme perfectly. Your hair is styled in loose waves, cascading down your shoulders. Your makeup is light and almost natural. You look beautiful – actually, stunning. Twirling once in the mirror, you smile at your reflection.

Everything's perfect, except for one little problem : the zipper at the back of the dress. It's caught halfway up and it's stubborn as ever. No matter how much you twist your arms behind you, like a pretzel, it just won't move.

"Damn it," you mutter before glancing at the clock. It's 12:45. You have to leave soon.

Everyone is busy, probably readying themselves or helping the bride. Jungkook is around somewhere, probably helping to load the last-minute items into an SUV.

He crashed in one of the guestrooms last night. This morning, he emerged out of it for a quick breakfast meal before vanishing to get ready. You haven't seen him suited up yet. You bite your lip, grabbing your phone to text him. "Hey, you free? Zipper emergency in my room. Help."

A few seconds later, there's a knock at your door. "Y/N? It's me."

"Come in," you call, turning your back to the mirror to inspect the zipper again.

The door opens and Jungkook steps inside before closing it softly behind him for some privacy. He freezes for a second and his breath catches.

You glance at him, and... Wow. He looks good. Like really, really good. His black suit fits him like it was tailored by angels. His hair is styled back, but a few strands fall over his forehead, making him look hot. The tattoos on his right hand peek from his cuff as he adjusts his expensive watch. He looks like he stepped out of a magazine, he's so effortlessly good looking.

You don't even notice how he's staring at you. His eyes are wide, taking you in. From your hair, down to the hem of your dress. His eyes linger on the way the dress hugs your figure perfectly.

Beautiful doesn't cut it for him – you're breathtaking (literally and figuratively). His throat bobs and his heart slams against his ribs.

That minor crush of his is insistently roaring to life at this moment, but he pushes it down hard. No staring or blurting out how ravishing you look. Play it cool.

"Whoa," he says, keeping his voice steady. "You look...nice. The dress suits you." Understatement of the century.

You feel heat creeping up your neck at the compliment and your eyes linger on him again.

"Thanks. You look good yourself. Like really good." you say, before clearing your throat. "Uh, zipper issue. Can you...?"

"Yeah, sure."

You turn your back to him and push your hair to the side, exposing your skin and the zipper to him. Jungkook steps closer, so close that you can feel his warm breath on your shoulder.

His fingers brush your bare skin, where the dress is cut low on your back. He carefully eases the zipper, manoeuvring it so it isn't stuck anymore. He zips it up and the fabric smoothens over your body.

Jungkook fights the urge to let his hands roam inappropriately over you. Up close, he can see the tiny birth mark on your shoulder. The lilac colour compliments your skin so well. Get it together, he warns himself.

"There," his voice is huskier than intended. "All set."

You turn slowly to face him. You're close, way too close. You look up, meeting his eyes and time seems to still. Your lips part and your breath shallows. Jungkook's hand hovers near your waist, he's debating whether to step back or pull you closer. He gently puts a few strands of hair behind your hair, thumb grazing your cheek accidentally and neither of you move.

"You look really beautiful." he says quietly before he can stop himself. His eyes drop to your lips then back up.

"Jungkook..."

Is he leaning in? Are you? What's happening?

Before anything else can happen, there's a loud knock at the door. It's one of your cousins.

"Y/N!" her voice is urgent through the door. "Come quick! Lara is having a meltdown. Something about the vows and cold feet. She needs you now!"

You blink, startled. "Coming!"

You glance at Jungkook, a small, almost regretful smile tugs at your lips.

"Duty calls."

He nods and steps back reluctantly with a forced chuckle.

"Yeah, go save the day."

You slip out, closing the door behind you, leaving Jungkook alone on the room. He runs a hand through his hair, exhaling slowly. *Close call*

The minutes to the wedding pass quickly. You and the rest of Lara's bridesmaids have been hugging her, handing her tissues and reassuring her. You've also spent a good few minutes comforting your big sister and giving her words of encouragement, which makes her feel way better.

She pulls you into the tightest and most sisterly hug, as her tears keep falling. "What would I do without you?" she sobbed onto your shoulder.

By the time the makeup artist comes back for a quick touch-up, Lara is steady and looking radiant again.

Downstairs, everyone is getting into cars, and the limo idles in the driveway. Lara, two of the other bridesmaids – Lara's closest friends – Yejin and Mina, along with you gather in a small group for last-minute selfies before getting into the vehicle, ready for the drive.

Through the window, you catch sight of Jungkook by his car, keys in his hand and herding a few of your family members, before getting into the driver's seat.

Your eyes meet briefly when the limo passes and Jungkook gives you a thumbs up, mouthing.

Your heart does a little flip, but you wave back, sinking into the seat as the limo turns on the road. Mina pops a bottle of non-alcoholic bubbly for the drive as the four of you chatter – mainly assuring Lara.

Twenty minutes fly by, and soon the venue comes into view. It's beautifully set up, almost like a Fairytale. The sky is a perfect blue without a cloud in sight, as if the universe has conspired for Lara's dream day.

Guests are milling about. There's probably about two hundred of them – a mix of family and friends from both the bride and groom's side.

The groom stands down the aisle. His face lights up when he spots the limo pulling up, even though his nervousness is evident.

The limo doors open, and you and the rest of the bridesmaids step out. You all help Lara out. You smooth your sister's dress as the photographer takes photographs.

"You've got this, sis." you whisper to her.

Jungkook's car arrives behind and the passengers get out. He helps Hana out, her tiny hand in his. She spots the basket of flower petals waiting by the pavilion and squeals while tugging Jungkook along.

As the wedding starts, Jungkook sits in the first row, next to your mom. She pats his knee fondly. He smiles at her, but his eyes are already seeking for you.

The soft music plays and the ceremony commences. The flower girls scatter lilac petals happily. Hana glances at Jungkook for reassurance, he gives her a smile and a thumbs up to which she beams. Jaden, the tiny ring bearer, looking super serious follows behind them. Then the bridesmaids and groomsmen walk down arm in arm.

Jungkook's breath catches when he sees you again. You look like you like you belong in a dream – definitely in one of his. You look so ethereal. He can't help but stare at you, admiring everything about you.

Your eyes glisten with unshed tears. You're getting emotional, just as he knew you would.

A tear falls and you dab it discreetly with your bouquet. Lara appears with your dad's arm linked with hers, the crowd stands and gasps in awe.

But Jungkook's gaze keeps drifting back to you. He watches you up there, and he can't stop the thoughts from flooding in. What would it be like... To be in Jay's place? To stand at the altar waiting for you to walk down the aisle? To see you in white with your eyes locked on his, promising him forever?

That idea hits him. It's scary and exhilarating. He's buried his feelings for years – feelings he doesn't understand fully either, but he feels a crack in that facade. You make eye contact with him and his breathing actually falters.

The ceremony goes quickly. The officiant speaks of love and commitment, rings are exchanged and with a kiss, Lara and Jay are married.

                     ♡━━━━━♡

You take off your heels the moment the official photos end, and parade barefoot across, helping the caterers or whoever needs you. You don't notice the way a certain pair of eyes follow you.

Jungkook has also been commandeered by the guys. He stands near the open bar with Minho and two of Jay's groomsmen. He's got a half eaten skewer of bulgogi in one hand and a beer in the other.

From across the lawn, you spot a familiar box. Hana is sitting cross-legged on a picnic blanket with a couple of other kids. She's got a box of Kancho. You abandon the tray of macarons you've been arranging and walk over to him.

"Hey, kiddos," you crouch down beside them. "Have you found Uncle Kookie by any chance?"

Hana shakes her head. You glance into the open box, your fingers itching with curiosity. You pick one out and turn it into the light and you see the tiny Hangul writing "정국"  you gasp.

You stand with the biscuit between your fingers as you scan the crowd. You see Jungkook talking to someone with his head back as he laughs. Again, you feel that flutter in your chest, with a grin you walk over to him, weaving through the guests.

"Jungkook."

He turns, his beer halfway to his lips and eyebrows raised at your tone. You hold up the Kancho like a winning lottery ticket. Jungkook eyes blow wide.

"No way." he sets his beer down. "Give it here, let me see –"

You pull it back teasingly. "Nuh-uh. You have to earn it."

The guys who've been observing your interaction with Jungkook, erupt in flirty teasing. Jungkook's ears turn pink but he grins and steps closer to you.

"Y/N. My entire life has led to this moment. Please."

You tilt your head, pretending to consider.

"Hmm... Maybe you could dance with me?"

He grins and takes your free hand into his, guiding you away from everyone else. The main dance floor is busy, everyone having a blast, but Jungkook doesn't even glance at it. He just keeps walking with his fingers laced with yours, until the two of you reach the far end that's quieter and away from the eyes of people. Jungkook's hands find your waist to pull you closer to him, and your hands find his shoulders.

"Better," he murmurs near your ear, since he's that close. "Less audience"

You hum in agreement, before your fingers find the nape of his neck. You start to sway with him, you've danced with him quite a few times – at parties, clubs and game nights with your friends where you always end up drunk, so you're used to having him like this... Except the atmosphere feels a bit different now.

Jungkook's eyes are darker than they usually are. You watch them flick down to your mouth for a second, then back up quickly. You do the same without meaning to. Your eyes drop down to his bottom lip, watching as he keeps wetting it nervously. You wonder – stupidly wonder, what if it would feel like if you just leaned in a little. Just to know. His hands go further down your back, just above your ass to hold you closer to him. It's not inappropriate, well not really – he's just trying to guide you since he's a better dancer than you are, that's all, right?. Your own hands aren't innocent. One has went from his neck to rest over his hard chest where you can feel his rapid heartbeat.

Another couple waltzes closer, Jungkook angles his body to shield you from into them. The movement brings you flush against him – right up against him, you both pause, but don't step back.

The song changes to a slower one now, and you're both barely moving – just rocking in place and breathing in each other's air. His forehead almost touches yours and his nose slightly nudges alongside yours.

"Hi," he whispers like he's just remembered how to use his words.

"Hi," you whisper back.

You trace patterns on his neck, his breathe hitches, so quiet that you'd miss it if you weren't so close. His thumbs draw circles on your lower back softly, as if he's testing how much he's allowed. Your forehead finally does rest against his and neither of you move.

There's a long moment where it feels inevitable. Where the space between your mouths is so small, it's almost gone. Where all you'd have to do is tilt you chin up just a little and your lips would touch his. His hand tightens on your waist, and you edge closer to him, not entirely aware of what you're doing here.

Before you stupidly edge closer to him, the song ends and a faster one plays. The spells shatters ad you're reminded of what you were just about to do. What the hell were you thinking?

♡━━━━━♡

It's Sunday, the day after the wedding. Majority of your family members had come over to your parents' place after the wedding since they insisted on a family gathering – considering that everyone hardly ever sees each other.

After the function, Lara and Jay fled off to their fancy Honeymoon. Everyone else had stayed over to spend quality time together.

Now it's noon, and you're ready to get back home. You're standing in the kitchen, finishing up a cup of hot chocolate while scrolling through your work emails which you've been ignoring all weekend.

Jungkook emerges from the guest room with his bag. It's really sickening to see how good he looks, despite the late night – at this moment you envy him. How is he so perfect?

"Morning, fam." he greets everyone. "Thanks for everything. I had a great weekend."

Always so good with his words, knowing just how to make everyone love him.

Your mother is bustling around with tupperware containers and parcels.

"You two work too hard, you need proper food!" she insists, shoving the containers and parcels into you're and Jungkook's hands.

Once her hands are empty, she pulls you into a tight hug before kissing your cheek.

"You two come back soon, okay. Your dad and I are getting old." she guilt trips.

You snort a little laugh and hug her back. "We will, mom. Promise."

The its Jungkook's turn. Your mother pulls him into her arms for a big arm. He bends down to her level and pats her pack gently.

"Take care of yourself, Jungkook." she cups his face and looks at him seriously. "And take care if my baby, hmm? She's tough, but she needs someone watching her back. And, I think you're perfect for that." she winks at him.

Jungkook's face heats up, but he nods. "I will. Always. Thanks for having me."

Carrying your bags and parcels, you and Jungkook make your way out the house and to his car to pack your things inside. Afterwards, he gets into the driver's seat and starts the engine.

"Homeward bound. Buckle up, princess." Jungkook says, and you have to ignore the butterflies you feel at one of the many nicknames he calls you.

You buckle up and wave to your family as the car pulls away.

Soon you're on the highway, and Jungkook turns on the radio, skipping songs until he finds one that he can sing word for word. He's got such a pretty voice and he knows it. He's such a showoff sometimes.

You recline the seat back, and decide to pull out your phone and scroll on tiktok. The algorithm knows you so well since your feed's filled with a bunch of wedding videos. You show Jungkook a couple of videos that he finds just as much funny as you do.

As you scroll, you come across a particular trend that you've been curious to do, but never quite had the guts to – the viral kiss your best friend trend to see their reaction. You've considered doing it on Jungkook, just to gauge his reaction, but you're scared incase it might be weird.

You've been his best friend for four years, and there's absolutely nothing romantic going on between you two. So wouldn't it weird to just kiss him for something as silly as a tiktok trend? But if you did, it'd purely be for fun. And besides, he'd probably push you away or smack you. If he wants to know why the hell would you do something so demented, then you can just come clean and tell him that you were just messing around. And, you'd take a video for proof.

It's just a silly, random trend. What's the worst that could happen?

                     ♡━━━━━♡

After nearly two hours of yours and Jungkook's chaotic, fun drive, you're almost home now. There's about ten minute left to your place, but of course Jungkook isn't too eager to take you home yet.

"Hey, wanna stop and get something to eat? I know you get hungry every two seconds."

You pause your tiktok scrolling, realising that he's right – you are hungry.

"Oh, yes. How do you always know? I could have a cheeseburger right now. And fries."

He chuckles, steering the car to your favourite fast food place. The one you and him always stop by for random dates.

When he pulls into the diner, he kills the engine and stretches with a groan.

"Come on, let's get something, Gremlin."

The two of you enter and Jungkook stands close to you as you decide what you're ordering.

"Okay," he nudges your hip with his. "What're we getting? Double cheeseburger, large chilli cheese fries?"

"The fries are big and messy. What if they drop in the car? You'll be cleaning cheese our of the seats for weeks."

"Me? You're the one who does all the messing, so you'll be cleaning them."

He pokes your side, right in the ticklish spot he knows too well. You yelp and smack his hand away with a laugh that embarrassingly gains attention from the other  customers.

"Stop! We're in public, you animal!" you whisper-yell, even though you're still grinning at him.

You grab his arm and hold his bicep as the line goes forward. It's so strong in your fingers. You love holding them, you love how strong Jungkook is. Okay, that's a little weird, but it's not your fault that your best friend is blessed with such perfection!

Without warning, you lean in and nip at it. Biting him is your weird habit you just developed some time along the years. You've been doing it ever since your first year of friendship – usually on his arms or shoulders. It doesn't hurt, he just gets surprised – and secretly, he finds it endearing as hell.

He jerks away dramatically, rubbing the spot with wide eyes. "Ow! Cannibal! What was that for?"

"For calling me a Gremlin earlier." you bat your lashes sweetly at him. "And because your arm looks so biteable. I don't know, maybe it's the tattoos."

Jungkook laughs and wraps his arm around you in a loose headlock, pulling you against his side.

"I don't think you're okay. Must be the hunger. Here –" he takes out a mint from his pocket, unwraps it and holds it to your lips. "Chew this instead of me."

You wrinkle your nose, but open your mouth to let him pop it in. The line moves another step forward, and the smell of the food is stronger now. You wriggle free from his hold, but stay close and loop your arm through his, before standing on your toes and ruffling his hair, until its standing up a little.

"Wow, you look like you've just woken up from a nap."

He ducks and hits your hands away half-heartedly. "Seriously?"

As revenge he grabs your ponytail and tugs it so it's untidy. You gasp, before lunging at him to bite his shoulder. Jungkook yelps louder this time, drawing odd looks from people.

"Woman, you're gonna leave marks! What are you, a vampire?"

He rubs the spot, but he's laughing. The truth is, he loves this side of you. All goofy and affectionate. That's how both of you are with each other – it's your thing. The teasing, the playfulness and the affection that borders the lines between best friends and... well, friends who might fit a little too perfectly.

When the line's finally budged, Jungkook slings his arm sound your waist and pulls you forward with him. You lean against him as both of you order for yourselves – getting pretty much the same combos.

After both of you got back to the car with the takeout bags, you decided to take the short drive to the beach.

Once you're there, Jungkook parks in a space overlooking the gentle water. You unpack the food on the console and you both waste no time in digging in, both moaning pleasantly at how delicious the food is.

The two of you fall into easy conversation as you eat – Talking about work, reminiscing about the weekend with your family. You and him always do this. You go on best friend dates atleast once a week, and it's honestly the best feeling to sit anywhere with Jungkook and listen to what he has to say, or yap about whatever while he listens in turn. Being with him always feels perfect, no matter what you're doing.

You pull out your phone and take pictures. You get a video of Jungkook sipping his drink and doing a peace sign to later post on your spam account.

Once you've both finished eating, you both sit for a long while, letting your foods digest. The drinks are only half gone, since you're both sipping it slowly. When they're finished, you steal one of his mints, eat one then pop another into his mouth to get rid of the faint taste of the burgers and fries.

Your mind wanders back to that tiktok trend. It's been nagging you. Just a silly trend. Just for fun. Jungkook's in the middle of some story you're barely listening to now, since your heart is picking up pace. It'd be hilarious. Okay, maybe more shocking... But best friend's do dumb things, right?

You set your drink down, and prop your phone on the dashboard against the windshield, angling it casually before hitting record.

"and my printer jammed right as the client walked in," Jungkook says as he chuckles at the old memory at work.

You shift a bit closer, your heart beat quickening yet again. You're strangely feeling nervous, and a little excited. As he pauses to take a breath, you reach out gently to turn his face towards you.

His eyes widen in confusion, and before he can react you lean in and press your lips to his softly. You unexpectedly feel tingles at the foreign feeling of his lips on yours. Jungkook is frozen for a second, his brain short-circuiting. What the–? Then, on complete instinct, his hand lifts to find your throat to hold you closer to him. He kisses you back, hesitantly at first, then deeper. His lips part as his tongue brushes yours, you taste the mint from his gum.

His other hand grips the console, his heart is hammering in his chest. This is finally happening? He thinks.

But you abruptly pull back with shaky breath. Your face is hot, and you're mentally screaming at yourself. Was that supposed to happen? What the hell did you just do?

"Uh... it-it was just a trend." you blurt out with your voice higher than usual. "You know, the tiktok thing – kiss your best friend to see their reaction. Funny right..?" you try your best to steady your laugh, but it's a bit shaky.

Jungkook blinks, processing what you've just told him. Disappointment hits him immediately. Just a trend? His chest tightens, but he masks it as quick as he possibly can. He chuckles, though it's obviously forced.

"Oh... I see. Hilarious." He releases his hold on you, and his hands drop to his lap. But his fingers twitch as if he misses the contact already. "You got me good. Shocked the hell out of me."

For the first time in all your years as friends – the atmosphere is awkward. You fiddle with your straw, sipping the drink that your taste buds cannot taste at this moment. Your face is burning. Stupid, stupid. What have you done?

Jungkook clears his throat and starts the car. "Uh, ready for me to take you home? We've both got an early start tomorrow."

"Yeah, totally." you say too quickly.

As he drives you to your place, you just hope and pray that you haven't ruined anything.

A/N – I'm sorry, I know this part is a little boring... I just wanted to make it a bit realistic, so I couldn't have made them too touchy or romantic in this part. I also tried to show how they're best friends first and foremost – even though they're mutually pining over each other. I'm not sure when I will have part 2 out, but it will be tense after Y/N's little prank 😖.

The next day, Noah leads you to the ‘writing room’. They’ve assigned one empty room for Jungkook to work in—a place where he’d work his magic. Although you’re pretty sure the spell is broken. Your pulse drums in your ears, far from enchanted at the thought of being trapped here with him for hours.  

When you step inside the room, he’s already there, sitting on a chair and visibly writing something on a desk—probably working on a song.  

“Jk,” your brother calls for the man, “she’s here.”

The Devil Lovers’ lyricist doesn’t even bother to look around.

“I’ll leave you two alone. Try not to murder each other,” your brother adds.

That’s definitely something you can’t promise. If Jungkook gives you reasons to strangle him, you’ll do it without even blinking.

Noah leaves the room, and for the first time in five years, you find yourself alone with the man who broke your heart. Yeah, he did that, and that’s why you hate him with all your soul. How could a man kiss you, push you away, and date a new girl a week after? For sure, a cold-hearted one.

“As much as I don’t want to be here and talk to you,” you begin while biting your nails, a habit you have when you’re stressed, “you need to explain to me how this works.”

You can hear him take a deep breath before turning around to face you, finally. The distance between you is honestly a relief for you, but you know you won’t be able to keep it up for long. You can’t work while being far away. Inevitably, you’ll end up being closer.

“It’s quite simple,” he replies, leaning back on his chair and his hands falling on his lap. “You just write what crosses your mind, but you already know how to do that.”

You roll your eyes. “Songs and novels are different.”

“Not really,” his eyes are locked on yours. “It’s just presented differently.”

This has to be a joke. If this is what it will be like working with him, you’ll end up finding creative ways to suffocate him.  

“You’re telling me that I can write whatever the fuck I want, and it’d be good?”

“Exactly.” His nonchalance freezes and annoys you completely.

“I’m not doing this.”

You turn around, heading to the door to leave the room. Jungkook isn’t helping at all. Songs and novels are polar opposites. Songs are short, filled with emotion. A novel tells a story, follows someone’s journey. It’s not the same.

“Look,” he begins, standing up, “I know you’ve never done this, and it’d take too much time to show you how it works. So, I thought it’d be easier if you write whatever crosses your mind and I’d adjust it to fit it in a song.”

You’re not sure you want to face him right now, but looking at the door seems way easier than looking at him.

“You’re insulting me and my capacities,” you clap back.

“I’m not,” he replies, and you can hear his voice getting closer. “I’m just making it easy for us.”

A forced laugh rumbles from your throat. Who is he making it this easy for? If he were able to fucking write a song, you wouldn’t be here, so this is not making it easy.

“For us?” you then ask. “Not sure we have the same notion of easy.”

“Yn,” his voice sounds like a whisper, “look at me.”

The way he whispers your name sends shivers down your spine. How dare he?

“No,” you reply.

Jungkook instantly gives up, not wanting to make this any worse.

“Sit down with me and let me show you.”

There’s a certain hesitation, but you take a deep breath before facing him again. You promised your brother you’d help, and you’re not a person to fail her promises, especially not with Noah.