unmedicated whatever

I want to scream at you so you know how badly you hurt me, so that you can comfort me, because no one sees me like you do, and no one comforts me like you do. But what's the point in arguing, it's not what you want, it's what I want.

I just came across the song that put me to sleep in middle school. I listen and close my eyes. I can see the dark bedroom, feel my back sinking into the mattress, feel the sheets on my skin. The air was stuffy and warm so I slept without a blanket, but the exhaustion of trying and trying and trying weighed on me like a thick comforter. I craved the comfort of sleep. Sleep did not give me racing thoughts. Instead, I could drift far away, maybe for forever. I knew of little. I did not know I was loved, but I knew I had to fight alone. I feel the same often. Nostalgia can be the most sobering thoughts.

when you talk to a man and you can tell he has never had to develop sensing how others perceive you as a skill to survive and it pisses you off because you wish you could be that stupid

How does one rewire their brain to accept love