Some of yâall quite frankly are horny from morning to evening 7 days a week with no breaths in between

JVL
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me


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@sugatartlette
Some of yâall quite frankly are horny from morning to evening 7 days a week with no breaths in between

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the way they look at each other in the end đ¤§
This image makes me so sad bc fat tailed geckos lose their tail everytime they feel threatened and when they regrow it its bigger. Ergo fat tailed geckos with especially stressful lives will have bigger tails and this one is HUGE
Actually, this is referenced from a photi my pet leopard gecko! Geckos also store fat and nutrients in their tail, so a chunky tail (on a leopard/fat tailed gecko of the correct weight) is a sign that they're very healthy!
This is so cute. I want a gecko now
fellow millennials, the fact that kids today donât know about caramelldansen is a failure on our part. Much how our parents failed us, we have failed this generation by not passing on the ancient traditions. The only solution is for everyone to start making caramelldansen videos again. Dust off your windows movie maker and start churning out chibis of this seasonâs hottest anime characters, lads. Weâve got work to do.
Oh honey yes. I used to dance to that shit all the time when I was 11. My mom busted out laughing everytime. BRING IT BACK LADS. EDUCATE THE MASSES
rich ppl are like so easily convinced abt ghosts I remember growing up it was near this vacant lot and whenever I broke a toy instead of going to face the wrath of my mother I would fucking bury it in that lot and then sure enough, some dude tried to develop the land and found a ton of buried rotten dolls and shit and told everyone it was haunted
itâs been over a decade and that lot is still vacantÂ
You single handedly tanked the value of someoneâs prime real estate and that makes me happy
As soon as I read this I immediately started thinking of ways to do this on purpose to get cheap land and I was five posts down my dash before I realised I was becoming Scooby Doo villain

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My boyfriend talks in his sleep and because heâs bilingual, he says some hilarious/weird/sometimes creepy shit. I ask him every morning if he remembers saying this stuff and he has no idea about any of it.Â
Here are some of my favorites:
-âBabe, can you please turn down the brightness of your skinâ -After stealing all of the blankets: âThis is my right as a humanâ -After I take the blankets back: âI donât want your freedom, America. Just blanketâ -Sometimes he just says âHello?â as if heâs answering a phone call -One night he just said âCabbageâ which is weird because he doesnât know the english word for that when heâs awake. -After spooning me: âYou have a nice buttâ -âWho is that in the corner?â (terrifying) -âWatch out for the red ladyâ (even more terrifying) -Sometimes he will say things in German and it sounds like heâs speaking Parseltongue -One time I actually think he said something in Parseltongue -One time he talked about buying a ticket to âeverywhereâ and then just said âhello?â after two minutes of silence -And my all time favorite: âThis is MY yogurt, Satanâ
white person: *eats chicken tikka masala once* i justâŚ. i feel so connected⌠to indian culture âŚ. Iâm learning to speak islamâŚ. check out my third eyeâŚ.. chakra
Every time I see this. Every damn time. Iâm immediately sucked back into my fuckin. Fuckin English lit class with Mr. Fuckass McShit. Mr. âHit the gong to begin classâ, âNamaste, Childrenâ, âI wanna go backpacking in India to find my spiritual awakening and also my left burkinstock that I lost during a cedar sauna drum circleâ ass bastard. âDo you want to share your poetry with the class to get in touch with your emotionsâ ass fucker. Mr. âHereâs a photograph of a tribal shaman, describe him using nature wordsâ asshole. Pretentious-ass, condescending motherfucker. âDo you want to tell us about your saddest memory?â âI dunno, sir. Are you giving me an option?â âNo.â âThen why are you askingâ Every goddamn day. Fuck. âYou seem tense.â Oh, I seem tense? I seem tense. Well fuck, Professor Pillsbury, maybe I âseem tenseâ because I walk into a room on five hours of sleep to the sound of a goddamn brass gong drilling through my brain and your seven-foot-nine, socks-and-sandals-wearing, patchouli-smelling ass immediately gravitates in my direction with some shit like âa treeâŚâŚâŚ Is a Poemâ and I gotta sit here and politely tell you that No Iâm Not Comfortable Telling The Class About A Time I Was Emotionally Vulnerable With A Loved One using words that sound like the way the color yellow smells. Maybe I donât wanna sit in a circle and hold hands with Brittney from Computer Sciences to âalign our aurasâ or some shit. Fuck. Fuuuuuuck. I swear to God, if I wanted to sing âkumbayaâ with a smelly old guy with gross facial hair who writes bad porn on the side, Iâd go out to the parking lot and share a Hookah with Crazy Dan, the disgraced electrician. What, I donât wanna do an interpretive dance to represent the spiritual experience of eating Quinoa in a room full of ambivalent preteens and suddenly Iâm the âtroubled youthâ you need to Robin Williams âO Captain My Captainâ your way into having a Paternal Bonding Moment powerful enough to Expand My Impressionable Young Mind and Turn My Life Around, you goddamn saint, you? Jesus Fucking Christ. You insufferable jackass. Youâre not âEnlightenedâ, you rolled out of bed and ate half a pot brownie, wrote a sad song about a leaf, and strolled into class to ramble about your Spirit Animal for six hours straight before calling it a day. Holy Jesus goddamned Christ. Fucking Balls, sir. Holy Fucking Balls
This is very angry.
And VERY specific.
My boyfriend talks in his sleep and because heâs bilingual, he says some hilarious/weird/sometimes creepy shit. I ask him every morning if he remembers saying this stuff and he has no idea about any of it.Â
Here are some of my favorites:
-âBabe, can you please turn down the brightness of your skinâ -After stealing all of the blankets: âThis is my right as a humanâ -After I take the blankets back: âI donât want your freedom, America. Just blanketâ -Sometimes he just says âHello?â as if heâs answering a phone call -One night he just said âCabbageâ which is weird because he doesnât know the english word for that when heâs awake. -After spooning me: âYou have a nice buttâ -âWho is that in the corner?â (terrifying) -âWatch out for the red ladyâ (even more terrifying) -Sometimes he will say things in German and it sounds like heâs speaking Parseltongue -One time I actually think he said something in Parseltongue -One time he talked about buying a ticket to âeverywhereâ and then just said âhello?â after two minutes of silence -And my all time favorite: âThis is MY yogurt, Satanâ
My boyfriend talks in his sleep and because heâs bilingual, he says some hilarious/weird/sometimes creepy shit. I ask him every morning if he remembers saying this stuff and he has no idea about any of it.Â
Here are some of my favorites:
-âBabe, can you please turn down the brightness of your skinâ -After stealing all of the blankets: âThis is my right as a humanâ -After I take the blankets back: âI donât want your freedom, America. Just blanketâ -Sometimes he just says âHello?â as if heâs answering a phone call -One night he just said âCabbageâ which is weird because he doesnât know the english word for that when heâs awake. -After spooning me: âYou have a nice buttâ -âWho is that in the corner?â (terrifying) -âWatch out for the red ladyâ (even more terrifying) -Sometimes he will say things in German and it sounds like heâs speaking Parseltongue -One time I actually think he said something in Parseltongue -One time he talked about buying a ticket to âeverywhereâ and then just said âhello?â after two minutes of silence -And my all time favorite: âThis is MY yogurt, Satanâ
My boyfriend talks in his sleep and because heâs bilingual, he says some hilarious/weird/sometimes creepy shit. I ask him every morning if he remembers saying this stuff and he has no idea about any of it.Â
Here are some of my favorites:
-âBabe, can you please turn down the brightness of your skinâ -After stealing all of the blankets: âThis is my right as a humanâ -After I take the blankets back: âI donât want your freedom, America. Just blanketâ -Sometimes he just says âHello?â as if heâs answering a phone call -One night he just said âCabbageâ which is weird because he doesnât know the english word for that when heâs awake. -After spooning me: âYou have a nice buttâ -âWho is that in the corner?â (terrifying) -âWatch out for the red ladyâ (even more terrifying) -Sometimes he will say things in German and it sounds like heâs speaking Parseltongue -One time I actually think he said something in Parseltongue -One time he talked about buying a ticket to âeverywhereâ and then just said âhello?â after two minutes of silence -And my all time favorite: âThis is MY yogurt, Satanâ

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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My boyfriend talks in his sleep and because heâs bilingual, he says some hilarious/weird/sometimes creepy shit. I ask him every morning if he remembers saying this stuff and he has no idea about any of it.Â
Here are some of my favorites:
-âBabe, can you please turn down the brightness of your skinâ -After stealing all of the blankets: âThis is my right as a humanâ -After I take the blankets back: âI donât want your freedom, America. Just blanketâ -Sometimes he just says âHello?â as if heâs answering a phone call -One night he just said âCabbageâ which is weird because he doesnât know the english word for that when heâs awake. -After spooning me: âYou have a nice buttâ -âWho is that in the corner?â (terrifying) -âWatch out for the red ladyâ (even more terrifying) -Sometimes he will say things in German and it sounds like heâs speaking Parseltongue -One time I actually think he said something in Parseltongue -One time he talked about buying a ticket to âeverywhereâ and then just said âhello?â after two minutes of silence -And my all time favorite: âThis is MY yogurt, Satanâ
My boyfriend talks in his sleep and because heâs bilingual, he says some hilarious/weird/sometimes creepy shit. I ask him every morning if he remembers saying this stuff and he has no idea about any of it.Â
Here are some of my favorites:
-âBabe, can you please turn down the brightness of your skinâ -After stealing all of the blankets: âThis is my right as a humanâ -After I take the blankets back: âI donât want your freedom, America. Just blanketâ -Sometimes he just says âHello?â as if heâs answering a phone call -One night he just said âCabbageâ which is weird because he doesnât know the english word for that when heâs awake. -After spooning me: âYou have a nice buttâ -âWho is that in the corner?â (terrifying) -âWatch out for the red ladyâ (even more terrifying) -Sometimes he will say things in German and it sounds like heâs speaking Parseltongue -One time I actually think he said something in Parseltongue -One time he talked about buying a ticket to âeverywhereâ and then just said âhello?â after two minutes of silence -And my all time favorite: âThis is MY yogurt, Satanâ
My boyfriend talks in his sleep and because heâs bilingual, he says some hilarious/weird/sometimes creepy shit. I ask him every morning if he remembers saying this stuff and he has no idea about any of it.Â
Here are some of my favorites:
-âBabe, can you please turn down the brightness of your skinâ -After stealing all of the blankets: âThis is my right as a humanâ -After I take the blankets back: âI donât want your freedom, America. Just blanketâ -Sometimes he just says âHello?â as if heâs answering a phone call -One night he just said âCabbageâ which is weird because he doesnât know the english word for that when heâs awake. -After spooning me: âYou have a nice buttâ -âWho is that in the corner?â (terrifying) -âWatch out for the red ladyâ (even more terrifying) -Sometimes he will say things in German and it sounds like heâs speaking Parseltongue -One time I actually think he said something in Parseltongue -One time he talked about buying a ticket to âeverywhereâ and then just said âhello?â after two minutes of silence -And my all time favorite: âThis is MY yogurt, Satanâ
WELCOEM TO MY FUCK HOUSE
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
this post is still good even without the glitch thatâs how good this post is
for those who forgot about the hellhole that was the 2015 tumblr glitch:

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Cat uses liquify
MY FRIEND APRIL JUST TOLD ME THAT A GUY IN HER DORM BUILDING HAS A TATTOO OF A CAT RIDING A PIZZA SKATEBOARD AND IT SAYS âGET MEOWTA HEREâ
i wasnât kidding okay