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Burnt to the Core ♨ Chapter 6 | reader(f) x Firelord Zuko
synopsis: you are firelord zuko's direct attendant. zuko has long reformed the fire nation after ozai's takedown and zuko's assuming of power. but now you had a challenge of your own: your feelings for the firelord. what was just a simple crush turned out to be more trouble than you would have imagined. but it may have been worth it.
word count: 5784
warnings: no spoilers of the movie (besides using this gif here + how gaang now looks as adults). this is mature (MDNI + trigger warning), as a lot of violence/sexual topics will be brought up.*tw for this chapter*
authors note: its here its here!! but no agni kai yet. next chapter tho, trust, TRUST it will happen. still so happy and appreciative of everyones patience :) ill be sure to make this weekend extra productive and write the next chapter. and always a special ty to everyone who comment and reply, makes my heart scream <3
TAGLIST CLOSED
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Your mind had long shut down from reality.
Your mind brought you back home, back to mom and dad. Your mothers warm, welcoming arms that cuddle your coiled body. Your father in the kitchen, drenched in sweat while he happily makes your favorite fried eggs with scallion. The aromas of freshly picked herbs, the sounds of content chatter, the clinking of tea cups. It was all coming back in your time of need.
But then you’re pulled back into reality, surrounded by caring hands moments after getting tainted. Your back seared, the scent of cooking flesh nauseating you completely. The women stand guard around you, attempting to shield you from any further harm as you are carefully seated and balanced on a nearby stool.
Visceral cries and wails escaped your lips while the other woman tried easing your pain. Two cold, hard objects met your back, and you suddenly felt bittersweet relief. It was not much, but it was just enough to quiet your bawls. They offer supportive hands, but you couldn’t stand touch at the moment.
It was strange; you wanted to be left alone but not by yourself. As the ice temporarily numbed the burning on your back, you couldn’t help but feel so vulnerable. You were so exposed, not just in clothing, but in your feelings. Tears couldn’t stay in your eyes, and you wept as if you were in your room, isolated.
It was selfish to think that Lord Zuko would come to get you, to save you from the hell you were living. But Lord Indra had cemented your reality: you were nothing. A mere servant girl, someone worth the same value as a cabbage. The same way you were hired was the same way you could be exiled.
You are not special.
Before you have been many women, holding the same kettle you hold, pouring tea into the cups that have met a plethora of hands before your own. Your quarters were long slept on by other lives, body resting in the covers you’ve now assumed. And you are definitely not the first woman who has touched Lord Zuko’s hand like you did last night.
Your feelings were growing more numb by the second. Your once hastened heart steadied, and you finally closed your eyes. You were tired, but you knew you were not to get rest. Not now, and probably not for the next while. There was something shattered inside you, something that you knew could never be repaired to the way it was.
The women try to coo soothing words, offering sweet nothings and reassuring you that it did not look too bad. But the fact that it existed was a problem that you don’t think you’ll get over. And, what broke your heart more was that you were set up for this fate by Madam Minji, the very Chamberlain tasked to run and maintain the Firelord’s palace.
You were offered water left and right, those efforts only being in vain. Parched is far from what you were. And you felt bad, rejecting the kindness of these women who have not met you before. You prayed their kindness will be well received by the spirits, but you yourself could not accept it.
Desperate footsteps sounded from the end of the narrow hall. You were whisked away to the back of the bar, so evidently you were surrounded by shelves of food, barrels full of beer, and a closet with cleaning tools. This was, for the most part, the safest you’ve been the whole day. But it further reiterated the lack of worth you had.
When Lord Indra decided to mar your back, you’d thought that those surrounding you would take action in your stead. Instead, you were met with surprised eyes that then proceeded in smirks and laughter. Lord Indra had long explained what happened the night before, painting you as an inconvenient, worthless servant.
“Not so fire proof now, eh?” His words continue to mock you.
Sitting in your own nothingness, you couldn’t stop your tears from flowing. Your eyes were probably red, puffing up with every moment passing. The women realized that their soothing tactics were useless, and allowed you to find solace in silence. They continued to press the ice against your back, at least putting some relief in the situation.
Then, the boasting and chit chats from outside went suspiciously quiet. One voice, muffled and distant, claimed the space of sound, followed by the sounds of stomping and thuds. You couldn’t put too much stock in it, considering your mind was being tortured by the unwelcomed mark on your back.
But, new footsteps made themselves known, and halted in the room you were in. Perhaps another waitress, you thought to yourself. You glance back, met with the amber eyes you had been longing for. Unfortunately, you couldn’t even muster a smile, albeit the relief of seeing a familiar face. As your nails claw into your arms, you lift your head a bit, and in a hush tone, you speak out, “Zuko…”
His amber eyes, suddenly so dark and hollow, held a sort of distraught you’d never seen before. The waitresses moved away, like a rock being thrown at a flock of geese. The soothing ice was suddenly removed from your back, and you could see Lord Zuko break before you.
You look away, too ashamed, too embarrassed. You were already shy enough in your new linens, but it pained you to have him see you so weak. He murmurs something that you could not catch, and you watch as the women slowly begin to exit the room around you. You felt the ice against your back shift a bit, but the motions were delicate and did not further agitate you.
The scent of mint suddenly entered your sense of smell, and you knew Lord Zuko had closed the space between you. Your eyes were met with his shoes and his knees, seeing as he crouched down a bit to meet your level. Looking up, you were inches away from the Firelord.
Browned honey eyes stare back into your own, burning through your tough facade. His sharp nose was centimeters from yours, with his hair completely disheveled. Strands were stuck against his face, which was shiny and ornate with a light sheen of sweat. It looked like he ran over here. You realized pretty quickly the reason for why he was so close to you.
His right arm was extended and bending around you, cautious not to touch you at all. His large, veiny hand held the pieces of clothed ice that brought alleviation to your wound. He was careful not to apply too much pressure, but continued to mimic the hold that the two waitresses had previously.
“You… came for me,” you whispered, still in disbelief at his presence before you. It felt like you were dreaming, just for that moment. You felt like crying even more, though you were pretty sure your body was all cried-out.
Lord Zuko does not crack a smile, but his voice is the softest it's ever been, “of course I came for you. Why wouldn’t I have?”
You felt your insecurities fester, and for a moment, you wanted to push Lord Zuko away. His kindness, his sweet words, his gentle touch. You did not deserve such gifts. You did not deserve such efforts, especially with someone as excellent as him.
“‘m s-so s-sorry to t-t-trouble you,” you begin to stammer, tears somehow finding its way out of you once again. Nails dig deeper into your arms, the smell of blood fuzzying your brain. “I just… I don’t…”
It killed him to hear you so aimless. But he couldn’t yet give you the comfort you deserve. Not until Lord Indra got what he deserved first.
“y/n, you have nothing to apologize for,” Lord Zuko says quietly. A pang of guilt shot at his heart when hearing your apology in such a broken voice. “In fact, I should be the one apologizing to you.”
You look down again, shaking your head, “n-no, this is not your f-fault, Zuko. He’s just…he…”
He quickly brought his free hand to your face, hovering his finger over your lips. “I know,” he says quietly, taking in your sorrows as his own. “I swear it to you, I will make this right.”
You finally break, and relieve your arms from the hold of your hands. You bring your hands to Lord Zuko’s chest, clinging onto his nicely tethered robes. “Don’t, please. I am n-not worth another conflict.”
He looks at your desperate eyes, which could have made him fold the way they did the night before. But he was no longer in his rational mind. It was useless to him during times like this. He ignores your plea, and looks at your body.
“Can you walk?” He asks, a twinge of hope in his words.
Your eyes scan the floor, “I can b-but… straightening my back hurts a bit, and without the ice, it might suck even more.”
A bit was an understatement. But you cannot be blamed for wanting to hold onto as much dignity as you could. He takes in your words and pauses for a moment. “Alright,” he says simply. With his free hand, he gently guides your arms to his shoulders. “Hold onto me.”
“H-hey, this isn’t necessar–”
“I was not asking you,” Lord Zuko pressed on. “Hold onto me.”
You quiet down and do as you’re told. Your hands latch onto him, your shaky hands meeting with his warm, smooth skin. Albeit it wasn’t too smooth, considering his body was ornate with scars in all sorts of sizes. But it was comforting somehow, despite how embarrassing this was for you.
With one fell swoop, his free arm scoops you out of the stool, allowing you to sit safely on his forearm. His other arm continued to support your back, with the ice melting quickly between your severed back and his large hand. Streams of cold water ran down your back, drenching the very dip of your back where the dress continued.
Feeling shy once again, you dig your face in the crook of his neck.
Little did you know what this was doing to him. It was enough that your skin touched his this way, feeling your heart race against his chest. But it was another that his finger tips felt the soft and tenderness of your undamaged back while keeping the relieving ice against your burn. Your face digging into his neck sent shutters down his spine, briefly taking him out of his rage to indulge in you.
You still smelled so sweet, like the chamomile you’d given him during his sleepless episodes. Your hair tickled his collarbones and shoulders, but they were just as soft as you. Then, to make matters worse, you had instinctively wrapped your legs around him, securing your hold on him.
It didn’t quite crack him, but you were getting damn near close without trying.
“W-wait,” you suddenly spoke, your hot breath forcing goosebumps to rise from his neck. “You cannot come out holding me like this. You are Firelord Zuko. You are not to be carrying a s-servant like this.”
“And?” He was unimpressed by your point. “I am the Firelord– I dare someone to tell me what I can or can’t do.”
You remain quiet after this, your face remaining in his neck. You knew better than to get this comfortable with him, but at this point, it could not be helped. You were safe in his arms, in his care. You knew nothing more would happen to you as he was here, present, and attempting to help ease your pains.
He takes a seat in the stool you were sitting in, making you a bit more timid as you were now adjusted to sit on his lap. You move back a bit, facing him directly now. “O-oh, Lord Zuko, this isn’t formal–”
“y/n, you dropped the formalities when you addressed me earlier,” he reminds you, a small smile printed on his lips. “Are formalities really important right now?”
You accept his point. You move back a bit more, still clinging to his neck, while eyeing his hair. You giggled through your trembling lips and shaky body, “y-your hair looks awful…”
“Yeah?” He smirked at your refreshing change in attitude. You really were tougher than you gave yourself credit for. “It was supposed to be done by someone else.”
You sheepishly look away, “w-well, I hope they were gentle at least…”
You knew him too well, “...she did her best.” Immediately, you both erupt in quiet laughter. Lord Zuko felt your tension ease up a bit, the shakiness dulling just a bit. It was small progress, but he’ll take whatever he can get. “There’s a bun, so it is enough.”
“That’s extremely bare minimum,” you note in between giggles, “but I appreciate you still giving her credit.”
He smiles warmly before his entire expression falls stern. His amber eyes once again dim, with a sweet voice turned grim. He lets out a very deep sigh, “we’re going to leave this shithole now. Are you okay with seeing him again? Or would you rather I remove him from sight first?”
You were pensive for a moment, but then gave him a curt smile, “I am with you. Lord Indra is nothing to me so long as you are present.” But you quickly grab at the collar of his garment, keeping his gaze on you. “But… I’d like to try to stand and walk on my own.”
He does not deny you, “are you sure?” His words were coated with worry. “You do not need to force yourself.”
You shook your head, “I need to keep some dignity, if I can.”
He understands your words a little too well, and silently agrees. He carefully puts the clothed ice down, which was now just a sopping wet cloth. He slowly lets go of his hold on you, following your pace to become independent of his help. Lord Zuko feels your relentless struggle, the way your hands pushed down some weight in his forearms. Even then, he had no intention to let you down.
Carefully, your feet find themselves on the ground. The skirt of your silk dress flows down, wrinkles ornate all over as evidence of your day. You were still bent over a bit, your nerves hiking up as you slowly straightened yourself. Lord Zuko laments hearing your hisses as the burn on your back takes uncomfortably to your movements.
“Do you need me to do anything?” He quietly offers, his arms barely needing to flex to hold your weight.
You shake your head, “‘m fine, it just stings so much…”
Lord Zuko hums at your words, feeling his heart burn from your wincing. His calloused hands take hold of your own forearms, securing your place as you adjust to being back on your feet. You straightened up, but it still wasn’t quite normal. You could feel the burn writhe from the bend of your spine. You stood still, allowing yourself the time to get used to the feeling.
A few shaky sighs escape your lips as you adjust yourself to the new feeling in your body. Standing up as straight as your body was willing, you begin to wipe your dress. Lord Zuko quickly looks away as your fingers pull at the thin straps that hung from your body. You quietly giggle to yourself at his respectfulness towards you as you adjust your dress as best you can.
“You can look now,” you give him the OK. Following your words was a long sigh, as you looked down at your revealing dress. “...I feel exposed,” you admit in a blunt tone, looking down at your body.
Lord Zuko looks at you with sympathetic eyes, wishing nothing more than to disappear you from this place and get you to safety. But, you were safe, now that you were in his sight and reach. But his sympathy quickly turned to guilt, as those amber orbs analyzed the divots and curves of your body. The dip of your exposed back, the tender skin of your arms, and even your delicate hands were doing something to him.
“Spirits, forgive me,” he whispered under his tongue. Then, you watched as his hands made their way to his back, pulling at the strings of his waist band. The dark brown garment proceeds to fall to the ground, the binding strings sprawled about on the floor. Then goes the deep red tunic, its gold trimmings randomly shining from the light of the torches that surrounded you. Then, you watch as he begins to pull off the sleeves of his taupe inner robe.
This was the first time you had truly seen his physique. It was a sin to keep such a body hidden away as much as he hides it. The first thing your eyes latched onto was his prominent, well-defined chest that dented along the well developed muscles. Broad shoulders and strong arms that could harm anyone in a chokehold. You knew his collarbones and almost all of his upper body assets were prominent, but even his abs held contest to them.
And he wasn’t at all bulky– he was chiseled to perfection.
But then reality hits you like a cabbage cart and you realize the Firelord was stripping before you. “H-hey–! What are you doing?” You immediately interrogate, shamelessly covering your eyes as if you had not looked at him like a piece of meat just a moment ago.
“For you,” he says quietly, offering his robe to you. “I’m… also not eager to allow you to be seen like this.” He looks away from you, but even from the sliver of side profile you get to see, his upper face exposes a hue of red. “So I insist you wear this.”
“I… appreciate the gesture, truly, but these are handwoven specifically for the Firelord,” you say shyly. You didn’t truly care about those rules, but it would be extremely embarrassing for you to wear his clothes in public. “Not sure if you noticed, but I am very much not the Firelord.”
Lord Zuko looks back at you, immediately covering his face with his free hand to keep you from seeing his smile. He’s supposed to be serious, and somehow, you were still able to soften him. “I’m a little too aware that you are not the Firelord. But please, I insist you wear this for the time being.”
You accepted his offer, though you still felt that dent of reticence. You take the robe (which, adding to its value, was quite heavy) and carefully slip your arms in. You tie it as tight as it allows, considering you do not share the same measurements as him. It touched your back, but the material is so soft, it offers little irritation. Giving it a few adjustments, you immediately smirk at how large it was on you.
“It’s just about touching the floor,” you comment, worried about damaging such expensive and exclusive material. This robe alone would be enough to sell and retire the rest of your days, should it be yours to obtain.
“Looks like it was made just for you,” he hums quietly, not permitting his mind to go any further. Before you could make anything of his words, he offered you a hand, “are you ready to go?”
It felt like a dream after a very long nightmare. You carefully place your hand in his, trusting your life in his care. His rough, calloused hands take hold of you, a grip so gentle as if he was holding an egg. Giving him a final confirming nod, he begins to lead you away
In hindsight, Lord Zuko wished he had given you a little more warning.
When he escorted you back out to the bar, the rage he had temporarily abandoned when finding you had immediately returned. You two were met with now a flood of guards, who held every bar occupant captive until Lord Zuko instructed otherwise. It was funny just how much power the Firelord has without having to say a thing, as he had come with some guards and now had a whole army inside this small tavern.
“Firelord Zuko!” The guards acknowledge his presence, standing by and awaiting for instruction.
Lord Zuko ignores them just for a moment, meandering around the bar in such a way to body block you from Lord Indra’s sight. He was glad you did not seem to notice his scheme either, as you were more focused on keeping hold of his hand and following him wherever he was leading you. And for Lord Zuko’s personal needs, he didn’t want to let Lord Indra have another look at you. If it was up to him, he’d gauge his eyes out personally.
But even Lord Zuko couldn’t stoop to such cruelty, despite how others easily enact their own sinister acts.
“I need 10 of you to escort and be appointed to Lady Sai,” Lord Zuko begins simply. “She is to be safely escorted to her room, and not to be disturbed by anyone. Not even Chamberlain herself. Do you understand?”
The guards hesitate, fixated on you with Lord Zuko’s robes on. You understood that it was very interesting. Even you have not fully fathomed wearing his garments, which still bore his warmth from his recent wear.
Lord Zuko notices this, and his patience further thins, “did I stutter? Do as I say!” His tone ramps up, and you flinch from its sudden change. He had been speaking so gently with you just moments ago. He turned to you, attempting to adjust his tone but it was still stern, “go back to the palace. We will talk when I return.”
You stared at him quizzically, “w-what do you mean? Won’t we be returning together?”
Lord Zuko looks at you, his expression cold but not because of you, “I have to do something, and it may take me a bit of time. But I will go straight to you after.”
You shook your head, “n-no, I’d rather be with you, here.”
He quickly reverts back, looking into your eyes good and well. If it were up to him, truly, he’d go back to the palace and just be in your presence, even if he were back to his dreadful work and you were there keeping him company. “y/n, it is not that I do not want you here…”
“Then…?” You whispered softly, trying to look beyond those honey eyes.
He feels your hand squeeze his own, and quickly accepts that you will not falter. He gets slightly closer to you, enough that only you could hear his following words, “stay. But I want to apologize to you in advance for what you are about to see.”
Before you could say another word, he looked back at his guards, his tone once again rejoicing with rampage, “find a carriage– anything that will allow Lady Sai to sit and rest her body. I don’t care how you do it, just do it.” A few guards rush out upon instruction, quickly learning from their mistakes earlier. He then points at a few more guards, “guard her with your life, and protect her while she rests. Bring her outside and don’t let any of these idiots near her.”
The guards quickly nod, and navigate between the many stunned fire benders and tables to surround you. Lord Zuko gives you an apologetic look before letting go of your hand. Although you can still see Lord Zuko, your view gets quickly altered by the guards who have been tasked to sentry you.
The guards offer their hands, as they had noticed your trouble with walking when coming into view. As you allow them to support you, you look back at Lord Zuko, only to be met with his back. His wide, chiseled back was ornate with ripples of muscles, with a defined dip of his spine. His beautiful long hair skewed your sight of his upper back, but you could easily imagine the rest.
He was looking towards the corner in which Lord Indra was sitting, with the rest of the visiting lords moved far away from him. You couldn’t get a good look at him, as Lord Zuko was (purposely) blocking your vision. But with the sudden sound of heavy breathing, you knew Lord Indra was anxious.
“Let’s go outside,” Lord Zuko instructs, his hands now in his pockets. Not a movement was seen, nor a sound was heard. His patience was whittling down, towards the path of nonexistence. “Guards, drag him out,” Lord Zuko commanded as he began to walk towards the door.
“H-hey, wait!” Lord Indra finally sounded, a cry only a coward could make. “Let go of me! Where the fuck are you taking me?” Guards grab his arms, contesting his wriggling and struggle in their hold.
You follow with a reasonable amount of distance behind Lord Indra, who still insisted that he be unhanded. As you finally leave the tavern, your eyes struggle from the sudden brightness of the sun. A few guards quickly grab nearby clothes and stretch it over your head to shield you from its relentless rays.
You were immediately met with accommodation, as the tasked guards to find you a carriage returned. They rushed to you with a wooden wheelbarrow, which was luckily supported by 4 wheels. Inside, it was stuffed with whatever blankets and quilts they could find to cushion it for you.
All the guards assist you in getting into it, as you were too weak to otherwise hop in yourself. One guard put it upon himself to continue holding the cloth above you, as the sun was practically blistering. “Oh, you don’t have to do that,” you say warmly, bringing a hand to his forearm. “The sun will not do any harm.”
The guard refused, shaking his head profusely, “you have been trusted to us by Firelord Zuko. We will guarantee your safety and care.” The fear he had against his leader was palpable. You decide not to push on, understanding his situation well.
It seems that, for a long time, Lord Zuko had been a calm, understanding leader. As he was working with the Avatar to restore peace, he himself found his own inner equanimity. You had always heard the stories of his temperament as a teenager, though you obviously have never known him and experienced that yourself. But considering how calm the Fire Nation has been since his rise to power, and how well he treats his people, you deduced those stories to be rumors.
You were settled towards the sides of the city, receiving many curious eyes from the locals before they gave their attention to Lord Zuko. They all bowed in his presence, stopping their activities or dropping whatever they had in their arms to greet him. He walked towards the center square of this area of town, which immediately triggered the crowd to clear the space.
The attention was then directed to Lord Indra, who was now silently protesting while being dragged toward the center square. But you could not care to watch him when Lord Zuko was in sight.
He lifts his arms in the air, stretching every muscle of his upper body with ease. He cracks his neck, moving it all about to loosen his muscles. It was when you traced down his abs that you realized something: a scar, its residence dead center of his core. How had you not noticed before? Perhaps with everything happening, your mind was not operating at its best.
“Let him go,” Lord Zuko finally says, as the guards had dragged him just a few feet in front of him. Lord Indra gets thrown to the ground, the guards dusting their hands as they walk away from the scene. Furiously, Lord Indra rises, aggressively pulling at his beard to dust off the specks of dust and debris of the floor. “It seems you regret not listening to me last night.”
Lord Indra rolls his eyes, “don’t be so cocky. Having guards do your bidding doesn’t make you better than anyone.”
“Holding a defenseless woman hostage and striking her on the back is not a fantastic feat either,” Lord Zuko spews, cracking his fingers one by one. He doesn’t dare look up at him, as he gets to his thumbs. “But, feel free to spout more moronic shit to me.”
“So what now?” Lord Indra taunts, looking around at the many pairs of eyes narrowed onto them and the tension. “You gonna burn me like I burned your little servant girl there?”
“You’re a bold man for speaking to your Firelord like this,” Lord Zuko says calmly, bringing his hands up to his bun. He accidentally unravels it when gently removing his golden crown, allowing for his hair to flow loosely. He begins to walk over to you, disregarding Lord Indra completely. When he makes it to you, he bends down slightly, offering the crown to you, “mind holding onto this as well for me?” His voice suddenly sweet, like a pastry. You carefully take the crown, blushing immensely as you were now adorned in 50% of his usual attire.
While he was nearby, he also began to remove his boots, his bare feet now exposed to the hot ground below him. Not that he minded, of course, as he walked back to his place in the square. Lord Indra scoffs at him, “your father would be disgusted by you. Defecting your lineage with a girl who holds no value.”
Lord Zuko chafes his feet against the ground, getting used to its solidness. “It seems you don’t like me very much, Indra,” he pokes at his ego, dropping formalities completely. “Did I do something to you?”
Lord Indra looks at him, stunned as if he had said something unearthly. Dark eyes lower, his posture now straightened. He looks at the Firelord with an unpleasant stare, “I have lived for a long time, boy. Long enough to know that you will never have the same power your father once had.”
“And what kind of power did my father have that I don’t?” Lord Zuko pressed on, now more curious than angry. That said, he still held onto this fury, this insatiable feeling.
“Enough to bring his daughter to true strength,” Lord Indra hisses. He then smirks menacingly, eyeing the scar on Lord Zuko’s left eye. “Enough to teach his weaker child respect.”
Lord Zuko lifts his eyebrow, impressed with his audacity, “and where are they now?” Lord Indra keeps silent, gritting his teeth. “Right, they’re not here. And even if they were, you wouldn’t have gotten this far before being silenced forever.” Lord Zuko finally finishes stretching, with one hand lifted, he allows a controlled burst of fire to float on his palm. “Some mercy rubbed off on me from last night, but I now understand that mercy is not what you want.”
Lord Indra stares at the fire, quickly being reminded of the burns he had received from him the night before. It was not enough to scar or truly hurt, but the light trauma still remained. “All this for that peasant? Breaking the law for a girl with no worth?”
“I am the Firelord, therefore I am the law,” Lord Zuko spat, the flame in his hand now dancing slightly uncontrollably. “It was enough that you decided not to heed my commands and leave by Morningstar's arrival, but to then go and brand her?”
Lord Indra laughs, “you cannot be a ruler if you cannot keep your people in check. You will lose that crown sooner with how spineless you are.”
“I never considered it that way,” a dark tone coats Lord Zuko’s words. The fire in his hand writhes frenziedly, like even the flame itself could not handle his power. “Thank you for the advice, Indra. Let me start applying it today, right now.”
You knew Lord Indra knew his fate well. He knew he’d be imprisoned forever, key lost in the surrounding oceans. But, with this, his boldness has entered levels unknown. He was riling Lord Zuko up, attempting to mess with his head before he’s locked away forever.
But, when you give Lord Zuko a good look, there’s that controlled chaos that you recognized from the night prior. It was different, though. It was almost like, for a split second, he was… excited.
“You should feel special,” Lord Zuko taunts, the fire in his hand now struggling to remain still as slivers of lightning sneak its way out. “I’m changing the law just for you.”
Lord Indra looks at Lord Zuko long and hard, attempting to find any sort of hesitance. But his demeanor was set in stone, his expression determined. Seeing this, Lord Indra lets out a shaky sigh before stripping away the top layers of his clothing. He, too, removes enough to show his torso, ornate with hair and very few scars from burns and fights in the past.
“Finally growing some balls,” Lord Indra exclaims, allowing fire to appear in his palms. He cracks his own neck before anticipation envelopes in his eyes. “Can’t wait to settle this and show everyone what kind of Firelord you really are.”
Lord Zuko simply sighs, the sort of sigh you emit when you pity someone. Looking around, he notices someone particular in the crowd. Surrounded by guards as well, his dear uncle made his way down and found him, upon Lady Kira’s instructed words. He notices his uncle's worried expression, as if he was fearful of something.
But Lord Zuko was shockingly composed, despite the feelings that were aching to be let out. “Everyone,” he announces, looking around at the concerned looks that surrounded him. “Today, I have decided to temporarily revoke my ban on the first thing I had outlawed as the Firelord, and allow him the honor to lose at my hand in my final Agni Kai.”
“There he is,” Lord Indra boasts, his demented excitement only worsening. “A true Firelord finally coming out from dormancy. Perhaps the girl was not so useless after all since we all get to witness his real power.”
Lord Zuko smiles, humored by Lord Indra’s sudden performative banter. That was enough to make Lord Indra’s confidence dent. That smile alone was enough for unease to set in. “Now we get to find out how fire resistant you are.”
‹/𝟹 synopsis: overwhelmed by jealousy at the banquet, you flee only to be caught by zuko
‹/𝟹 content warningsﾉtags: soft!zuko, jealousy, crying, established relationship, bickering, teasing, kissing, emotional comfort, not proofread, lowercase intended
‹/𝟹 author's note: i love awkward and soft zuko... hello... zuko here... :,)
the air inside the grand hall was suffocating. every time you inhaled, the scent of perfurme and floral oils from the noblewomen surrounding zuko filled your lungs, making your chest ache with a pressure that had nothing to do with the corset of your formal robes. you watched from the shadows of a tapestried pillar, your fingers digging into the cold stone.
he looked radiant. zuko, the fire lord, the boy who used to stumble over his own heart, was currently the center of a swirling galaxy of suitors. they preened like turtle-ducks in a pond, their laughter tittering and high-pitched, echoing off the obsidian floors.
zuko wasn't pushing them away.
that was the thorn under your skin. he was leaning in, a small, genuine tilt to his lips as a daughter of a high-ranking magistrate whispered something into his ear. he looked comfortable. he looked like he belonged to them, to the nation, to everyone but you. the jealousy was a living thing in your throat, hot and jagged like a piece of flint. you couldn't breathe. the heat of the thousand flickering lanterns felt like they were blistering your skin, and before the first tear could even track a salty path through your powder, you turned on your heel.
the corridors of the palace were long and winding, lit by the low, flickering glow of dragon-bone torches that cast dancing, distorted shadows against the walls. you hurried, your silk skirts swishing with an agitated rhythm as you sought the silence of the royal gardens. the night air hit you with the scent of midnight-blooming jasmine and the dampness of the koi pond, a welcome relief from the stifling perfume of the banquet. you let out a ragged, choked sob, the sound small and pathetic against the vast silence of the stone courtyard.
"go away!" you cried out, not even looking back when the heavy thud of familiar boots echoed against the pavement. you knew that stride anywhere. it was purposeful, slightly heavy, the gait of someone who spent years chasing shadows and was no longer willing to let one slip away.
"no," zuko's voice cracked the stillness, sounding deeper than it had moments ago when he was charming the nobility.
you didn't stop. you tried to walk faster, the heels of your shoes clicking rhythmically, but he was faster. he was a master of the hunt and within seconds, he was there. his fingers, calloused from years of broadsword practice and firebending forms, wrapped firmly but gently around your wrists. you tried to yank your hands back, your face burning with a shame so intense it felt like physical heat, but he held fast.
"leave me alone, zuko," you hissed, your voice wet and thick. you used your shoulder to try and scrub at your eyes, desperate to hide the evidence of your crumbling composure. "it's stupid. i'm being stupid. just go back to your guests. they’re waiting for their fire lord to come back and smile at them."
zuko didn't move. he stood there in the moonlight, his ceremonial gold headpiece catching the pale light, looking every bit the formidable ruler, yet his eyes were clouded with a frantic, awkward sort of worry. he frowned, his brow furrowing in that specific way that meant he was overthinking every word before it left his mouth. he released one of your wrists, only to bring his hand up to cup your cheek. his palm was incredibly warm—the steady, pulsing heat of a powerful firebender—and it felt like a brand against your cool, tear-slicked skin.
"you're crying," he stated. it was so blunt, so painfully obvious, so typically zuko that for a fleeting second, the sob in your throat turned into a jagged, watery laugh.
"wow, your majesty," you snorted, leaning your head away even as you melted into the warmth of his hand. "nothing gets past you, does it? truly a master of observation."
zuko's face instantly flushed a deep, sunset crimson, the color spreading from his neck up to the tips of his ears. he looked indignant, his jaw tightening as he huffed out a small puff of smoke from his nostrils—a nervous habit he’d never quite outgrown. "i'm trying to comfort you! you're the one who ran off into the dark for... for no reason!"
"i had a reason," you whispered, the jealousy flaring up again, though it was tempered now by the sheer ridiculousness of him standing here in his royal finery, arguing with you in a garden.
"then tell me," he demanded, his voice softening. he used his thumb to brush away a fresh tear, his touch so light it was almost a caress. "stop trying to pull away. i'm not letting you go back inside until you're okay."
you looked up at him, at the scar that mapped his past and the gold eyes that promised a future, and you felt your heart do a slow, painful roll in your chest. "you suck at this," you muttered, though you stopped fighting his grip. "you're supposed to be charming and say something poetic, not just point out that i'm leaking from my face."
he scoffed, a short, sharp sound, but his hand stayed glued to your face. "well, i didn't see any of those 'poetic' guys following you out here, did i?" a smug, almost mischievous glint entered his eyes then. he realized he had the upper hand. he leaned in closer, his scent—charcoal, expensive sandalwood, and that underlying spicy musk of his own skin—overwhelming your senses.
"are you jealous?" he teased, his voice dropping to a playful rumble. "was it the magistrate's daughter? or maybe the lady from the eastern isles? she did have a very large hat."
"stop it," you giggled, the sound bubbling up despite your best efforts to remain miserable. you tried to swat at his chest, but he just caught your hand and held it against his heart. you could feel it thumping—fast and entirely yours.
"oh, i think the great fire lord has a crybaby on his hands," zuko continued, his grin widening into something truly wicked. he was enjoying this far too much. "a little, weeping turtle-duck. quack, quack."
"zuko, i hate you!" you cried out, laughing now, the tears finally drying as the absurdity of the situation took over.
he didn't answer with words. instead, he leaned down, his face inches from yours. his golden eyes were blown wide, full of a heat that had nothing to do with bending. then, he started to kiss your face. they were loud, obnoxious, exaggerated mwahs. he kissed your forehead, then your temple, then the tip of your nose, making a ridiculous smacking sound with every contact.
mwah! mwah! mwah!
"stop! people will hear!" you shrieked softly, squirming in his arms as he peppered your cheeks with the wet, noisy kisses. it was so unlike the brooding, serious fire lord the world knew, and that was exactly why it worked. he was being a dork just to see you smile.
finally, he caught your lips with one last, dramatically loud mwah. he pulled back just an inch, his forehead resting against yours, his breath warm on your mouth. his smug smile was still there, but his eyes were soft, molten gold.
"see?" he whispered, his thumb tracing your lower lip. "i think i do a pretty good job at comforting my crybaby."
you sighed, reaching up to wrap your arms around his neck, pulling him back down. the garden was silent, the crickets chirping in the distance, and for the first time all night, the air felt exactly right. "yeah," you murmured against his skin. "you're doing okay, jerk bender."
okay okay so adult! zuko x reader (also part of the team avatar and also let them have some history with zuko) where reader still hates him after everything and now when they meet again zuko is determined to fix their relationship.
Second Chances
Pairing: Adult! Zuko x Reader
Summary: after five years apart, you see zuko again at aang’s reunion—and realize neither of you actually moved on.
Word Count: ~3.5k (estimate)
Warnings: angst, unresolved feelings, past breakup, mutual pining, awkward tension, some soft physical intimacy
Author’s Note: this is very much a reunion/second chance type thing—less about why they broke up and more about what happens when they’re forced to face each other again. zuko’s a bit softer here than canon fire lord zuko, but i like to think he’d grow into it. i haven't really watched the movie (i am waiting for it to release) so some facts might be wrong here and there. constructive criticism is welcome, just be kind :)
The invitation had arrived three weeks ago, crisp cream parchment sealed with the Air Nation insignia. Aang was throwing a reunion—a proper one, with everyone. Katara had sent a follow-up note practically begging you to come, using words like "closure" and "healing" in a way that made your stomach twist uncomfortably.
You didn't need closure. You'd moved on. Mostly.
The lie died the moment you stepped into the Air Temple's great hall and saw him.
Zuko stood near the entrance to the courtyard, silhouetted against the golden afternoon light, and for a second, your entire nervous system forgot how to function. It wasn't just that he'd changed—it was that he'd changed, the way people do when years stretch between you and suddenly they're someone new, someone more, someone who makes your mouth go dry and your hands feel too hot.
His hair was longer. Shoulder-length and sleek, partially pulled back with a single piece of ribbon that probably cost more than your monthly rent, falling in waves that caught the light. You remembered when he used to wear it short and messy, and you used to mess it up more, just to see him smile. Now it looked—
Stop it.
The Fire Lord robes were magnificent, all deep crimsons and golds with those ridiculous sharp shoulder plates that made him look simultaneously more regal and more unapproachable. The scar on his left eye had weathered with time, more pronounced against his face, which was harder now, more defined. His jawline could cut glass. His shoulders were broader, impossibly so, the kind of broad that suggested years of training and responsibility.
He looked tired. That was the thing nobody would probably notice, but you did. You'd always been good at reading him.
His amber eyes swept across the room in that practiced way of Fire Lords—checking exits, assessing threats, maintaining control—and then they found you, and stopped.
The air didn't literally explode. Physics remained intact. But something in the world definitely shifted.
"Oh no," Katara whispered beside you, and you realized she'd caught the way your breath had hitched. "Oh no."
"What?" you hissed, tearing your gaze away and suddenly becoming very interested in a painting of clouds. Clouds were safe. Clouds didn't have amber eyes or long silky hair or biceps that looked like they could probably—
"You're staring."
"I'm not staring. I'm looking. There's a difference."
"Sure. And I'm the Avatar." Katara's voice was extremely smug. "Come on, let's get some tea before—"
Too late.
"Hey." His voice was different too. Deeper. Smoother, like it had been worn down and polished by years of diplomacy and command. "It's good to see you."
The bastard made it sound so casual, like you hadn't been the reason he'd written seventeen unsent letters (you knew because Aang had told you, after three whiskeys). Like you hadn't broken up because of a fundamental misunderstanding about ambition and responsibility and whether love could survive when two people wanted different futures. Like he wasn't now literally the most powerful nation's leader and you weren't just—
You were just you. Still just you.
"Lord Zuko," you said, and watched his jaw tighten at the formality. Good. You wanted him to feel at least some of the awkwardness currently staging a coup in your chest. "You look… different."
That almost-smile played at the corner of his mouth, and you hated that you remembered exactly how to read it. Amused. Resigned. Sad underneath.
"So do you," he said quietly. "Good different."
Katara, the absolute devil, excused herself to find Aang, leaving you alone with your ex while the universe laughed at your misfortune.
"I wasn't expecting—" Zuko started.
"You weren't expecting me to come?" You raised an eyebrow. "Aang was very persuasive."
"No, I—" He ran a hand through his hair, that long, beautiful, stupid hair that you very much did not want to touch, and you watched the movement with what you hoped was professional detachment. "I expected you to come. I just wasn't sure I could handle it."
The honesty knocked the wind out of you. Zuko had always been terrible at lying, and apparently, age hadn't changed that particular character flaw.
"Handle what?" you asked carefully.
He looked at you for a long moment, and you could see him doing the internal calculation, weighing words, considering consequences. Lord stuff. The kind of thing that probably consumed most of his time now.
"Seeing you," he said finally. "And wanting things I don't have any right to want anymore."
Your heart did something complicated and inadvisable.
"Zuko—"
"It's fine." He straightened his spine, and just like that, the Fire Lord settled around him like armor. But his eyes remained soft, still so frustratingly honest. "We're different people now. I get that. I'm just… I'm glad you're here."
The reunion dinner was torture.
Not because it was bad—it was actually lovely, Aang had outdone himself, and there was genuine joy around the table as the others fell back into easy rhythms of teasing and storytelling. But because Zuko was there, three people down from you (deliberate seating arrangement, courtesy of Katara's meddling), and every single time he laughed at one of Sokka's terrible jokes, you had to fight the urge to look at him.
You lost that fight often.
He'd catch you looking, and something would flicker across his face—hope, maybe, or just acknowledgment—and then he'd look back at his food, respectful of the distance you'd clearly wanted to maintain.
After dinner, you excused yourself to the courtyard. The sky was spectacular, all deep purples and bleeding oranges, and you needed air that didn't taste like regret and cinnamon (his scent; you hated that you still remembered).
You found a bench overlooking the valley, and you sat, and you tried very hard not to think about how things had ended. The argument. The harsh words. The fundamental incompatibility that had seemed so crucial five years ago.
"I thought I might find you here."
You didn't jump. Okay, that was a lie—you absolutely jumped—but you concealed it by pretending to stretch. "Just needed some air."
Zuko emerged from the shadows with the easy grace of someone trained since childhood in combat. He'd probably had to learn all over again after becoming Fire Lord—less sneaking, more visible authority. But the old instincts clearly remained. He sat on the opposite end of the bench, a careful distance maintained.
"I'm sorry," he said.
"For what?" You kept your eyes on the horizon, the way the sun was dying like it was ashamed of its brightness.
"For everything. For—" He paused, and you could hear the careful deliberation in his voice. "For not fighting harder, when we ended. For letting you walk away when I should have—"
"You were right," you interrupted quietly. "That's the thing that makes this so difficult. You were right, Zuko. I couldn't handle having a Fire Lord for a boyfriend. I needed someone who could just… be with me, without the weight of a nation on his shoulders."
"And now?"
You finally looked at him, and regretted it immediately, because the sunset was hitting his face in that golden way that made him look like something out of a painting, all sharp lines and soft scars and those damnable amber eyes.
"Now?" you asked.
"Do you still… need someone?"
"That's not fair," you said, and your voice shook slightly. "That's not a fair question."
"I know." He ran a hand through his hair again, and this time you didn't bother pretending not to watch. Let him see. Let him know that whatever he'd done with his stupid beautiful hair, you were still affected by it. "I'm not trying to be fair. Fair is what put us in that position five years ago—you being fair about your limitations, me being fair about my responsibilities, both of us being very rational and mature about destroying something that mattered."
You stood abruptly. "This is not going to work."
"Why not?"
"Because you're the Fire Lord and I'm—"
"What?" He stood too, and somehow wasn't crowding you, even though he was close enough to touch. "Still brilliant? Still funny? Still the person who understood me better than anyone, even when we were fighting? Still the person I think about when I wake up at three in the morning because I had a nightmare and I need to remember what it felt like when someone loved me just for being Zuko, not for being the Avatar's friend or the Fire Nation's leader?"
"Stop." Your voice came out broken.
"I've had five years to think about this," he continued quietly. "Five years of rebuilding a nation and fixing other people's problems and doing my duty. Five years of being responsible and measured and so fucking lonely." He stepped closer, and you let him. "I'm asking if we get a second chance. Not as different people—as these people. The ones we became."
"You don't know what you want," you whispered. "You're confusing nostalgia with—"
"I know I visit the café where you used to work when I'm in the city, hoping I might run into you. I know I've tried dating other people and it felt like wearing someone else's clothes—technically fine but fundamentally wrong. I know that when Aang sent that invitation, the only reason I agreed was because I knew you'd come. And I know that watching you sit across from me at dinner, trying so hard to not look at me the same way I was trying not to look at you, was the most honest thing I've felt in years."
You pulled in a shaky breath. "What happens when you get called back to the capital? When your country needs you and I need attention? We'll be right back here."
"Maybe," he acknowledged. "Or maybe we figure it out this time, because we're not kids anymore, and we know what we're losing if we walk away. Maybe I ask you to come with me sometimes. Maybe we find a rhythm that actually works."
His hand came up slowly—giving you time to move, to refuse—and carefully, gently, tucked a strand of hair behind your ear.
"Maybe," he said softly, "we stop punishing ourselves for our circumstances and just… try."
You closed your eyes. You thought about the alternative—walking away, going home, living with the persistent ache of the road not taken. You thought about five years of that.
"You can't touch me in public," you said finally, opening your eyes to find him waiting. "Too much symbolism, too many implications—"
"I can live with that."
"And I won't move to the capital. I have a life in the city."
"I can make that work."
"Zuko—"
"Just…" He stepped closer, close enough that you could feel the warmth radiating from him, could smell that cinnamon scent that probably came from the Fire Nation itself embedded in his robes. "Tell me you don't want this, and I'll walk away. I'll respect it. But don't tell me I'm wrong about what this is."
You looked at him—really looked at him, this version who'd grown into himself, who'd learned how to lead without losing the fundamental softness underneath, who clearly hadn't stopped wanting you even when he had every reason to move on.
"I'm terrified," you admitted.
"So am I."
"This probably won't work."
"Probably not," he agreed. His smile was sad and hopeful and devastatingly real. "But for the first time in five years, I'd like to find out."
You could have walked away. You could have maintained your dignity and your distance and told yourself you were being smart. You could have done a lot of things.
Instead, you reached out and took his hand.
His fingers curled around yours like they'd never learned to let go, and something that had broken in you five years ago began its slow work of healing.
"We should probably keep this quiet from the others," you said practically, even as you were unable to stop staring at how his eyes went soft, how that almost-smile became something fuller. "Katara will weaponize it."
"Absolutely fair," he agreed. "How long do you think before she finds out anyway?"
"Twenty minutes. Thirty if Toph does something"
Zuko laughed, and it was the exact same laugh you remembered, unguarded and real. "Come on, then. Let's go back in before they send someone to find us. I want to spend time with you without Aang making meaningful eye contact at me every five seconds."
You let him pull you toward the doors, his hand warm in yours, and tried to quiet the part of you that was still afraid.
That night, in the guest room that had somehow been arranged to be next to his, you lay awake and thought about second chances. About how sometimes the universe gave you one, but only if you were brave enough to take it. About how Zuko had apparently been brave enough to wait five years for the possibility.
You got up carefully and padded to the connecting door—there was one, you'd noticed with quiet surprise—and opened it just slightly.
He was awake, sitting by his window, still in his undershirt, his long hair pulled back. He turned at the sound of the door, and his eyes widened slightly.
"Hi," you said awkwardly.
"Hi," he replied, and there was something like wonder in his voice.
You climbed into his lap like you'd done a thousand times before, except it also felt brand new. He wrapped his arms around you carefully, like you might disappear, and you rested your head against his chest and listened to his heartbeat.
"This is going to be complicated," you murmured.
"Very complicated," he agreed, pressing a kiss to the top of your head.
"We'll probably fight."
"Definitely will fight."
"I'm going to have moments where I'm not sure we can make it work."
"So will I," he said quietly. "But I want to have those moments with you instead of without you. That's the only thing I'm sure of anymore."
You fell asleep like that, in his arms, in a room in an Air Temple, in the space between who you'd been and who you were going to become. Outside, the night sky was full of stars that had been burning for millions of years, indifferent to human heartbreak. Inside, something was burning too—but this time, it felt like healing instead of destruction.
Katara found out in the morning and absolutely used it as a weapon, but that was fine. That was expected. That was, in its own way, a sign that things were moving forward.
And in the weeks and months that followed, as you slowly built a new relationship with Zuko—one that worked around his responsibilities instead of despite them, one that was honest about the complications and chose to show up anyway—you decided that maybe second chances were worth it after all.
Especially when they came with a Fire Lord who was willing to learn how to be flexible, how to compromise, how to love someone without consuming them entirely.
His long hair and strong biceps were nice too, but that was just a bonus.
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I don’t understand how some of these fics have such little attention, all of these writers are soso talented!!
Morning With Fire Lord Zuko - @magikcheese3 = This fic is just so sweet that I can almost feel the warm vibes, it’s even comfortable to simply read :)
THE BUTTERFLY EFFECT - @illumoria = She’s such a talented writer, I adore the fluffiness of this fic, it’s soso cute
Zuko drabble - @singse = This is silly in the best way. I love how you can feel the familiarity between Zuko and the reader, it’s so fun
at the end of a long day - @getosurya = (It won’t let me tag :<) This fic is so fluffy and so sweet, I love how soft Zuko is in it, it’s exactly what the world needs
Forgotten Promises - @hon3y0logy = I am lowkey obsessed with their writing, they’re so talented and this is no exception
heat pads - @arfemiz = Give me 10 more of these (I’m kidding), this is so sweet!! I absolutely need this in real life
arranged marriage first kiss - @totallynotashieldagent = They have quite a few arranged marriage fics and I will eat every single one of them up, they’re so cute
tracing zuko’s scar - @strawberrychansora = This is so gentle but so sweetly written, it’s so cute! Zuko really deserves this treatment:>
baby, come back to me - @yn2ko = I was still thinking about this days after reading it, it’s so adorable
THIRD TIMES THE CHARM - @uhmnoidontthinkso = This does handle a heavy topic, but it’s written so carefully and so considerately in a way that’s really captivating
The Firelight Between Us - @dollfacearchives = This is so well written, especially the dialogue!! I adore how beautifully love is conveyed in this :)
biting cold - @like-a-pond = I really enjoy the mix of affection and tension in this fic, it’s such a sweet read!!
puppy eyed zuko - @kittentoki = This just has such a cute blend of angst and affection within it, even imagining this could make me melt
a lover who can’t sleep - @janluxe = This one is just so fluffy, the vibes in this are so relaxed and so loving, it’s so cute!!
🎙️ finally doing this for my most fave character on this wreck of series....connie baby you deserve so much better!! and im glad fanfic exists to write exactly that :") #teamconrad4lyf
also!!! pls feel free to promote yourself or recommend any more fics cause there is a lack of them unfortunately :") and a thank you to all writers for their amazing works!!
P.S THIS GOES WITHOUT SAYING BUT PLEASE READ ALL WARNINGS AND MINORS DNI WITH 18+ CONTENT, the rest is up to you as i am not in control of your media consumption :)
AO3 FICS
lover by @light-yaers / tumblr link [ ♡ ][ ♡ ][ ♡ ]
synopsis : It's been five years since you've been back to Cousins, Massachusetts; and Belly and Jeremiah are getting married.
You and Conrad were best friends once, will you ever be best friends again?
notes : THE fic that made me a conrad girlie, so well written, the characterisation and the flow and just everything. i love this so much with my whole heart.
Redux by @/acosmist_t [ ♡ ][ ♡ ]
synopsis : You closed your eyes and drowned in the past and present as they met right here, right now, in the backseat of a beaten car and in the care of the boy who taught you to love for the first time. You wanted to want him gone, you really did, but he made it too damn hard
or exes to lovers set in a band au
notes : YES. i FORCE you to read this, idc what you're doing, READ THIS NOW. this has everything and will MAKE YOU FEEL EVERYTHING YOU COULD POSSIBLY FEEL AND MUCH MORE??
TUMBLR FICS
after her, there was you by @pankowblues [ ♡ ]
synopsis : meeting conrad in freshman or sophomore year of college. he’s not over belly but eventually because of reader he gets over it and falls in love again.
notes : second chance at love <3 ; very cutesy ; deserved ; i love this writer's conrad works pls go check them out !!!
"you're my person, resting bitch face and all." by @princesscrter [ ♡ ]
synopsis : grumpy!reader x conrad fisher <3
notes : when i tell you, i love ac's writing. i love all her works, i will eat up anything she posts and so should y'all!! im so glad i found her through connie and this work is one of my fave of hers <3
The Wedding Guest by @roznnreads [ ♡ ]
synopsis : Conrad finds love again in college, at his brothers wedding, set after the events of season 2
notes : eagerly seated for pt 2, pls read this if you haven't already!!
Oceans by @seaglassandink
synopsis : When Conrad calls you from Cousins Beach, you expect a catch-up. Instead, he tells you Belly and Jeremiah just showed up engaged. What starts as a late-night FaceTime turns into sixteen years of friendship unraveling: old wounds, unspoken love, and the sting of realising he still hasn’t let go of her… and maybe never will.
notes : this is truly a gem. i love this series and i highly HIGHLY recommend if you love a good exes to lovers <3 or just connie in general lmao
you are in love by @marveladdictjones
synopsis : conrad being the best boyfriend ever.
notes : pls give my bf conrad i need him and this is so so cutesy <3
a playlist for you by @rainandsentences
synopsis : just monotony and some old devices.
notes : playlists for you loved one as a love language? sign me TF up.
THE SUMMER HE PROPOSED by @/pankowblues
synopsis : conrad proposing to you way better than jeremiah's lame self ever will :)
notes : as mentioned before, this author's conrad works <3 pls read them <3
Diagnosis:love by @certaimromance [ ♡ ]
synopsis : your boyfriend has been distant for weeks, but now he’s finally ready to open up and share what’s been weighing on his heart.
notes : this had me crying screaming giggling it was everything. i love you author for this.
empty space by @/rainandsentences [ ♡ ]
synopsis : wedding day at cousins, what could go wrong when belly returns home?
notes : hi so um i need like 14 more of this thank you. i love this, on a serious note take your time ofc :)
The Summer I Chose You by @mostlyinsanechrissy
synopsis : as the title says :)
notes : clicked for the amazing fic (no regrets) ; stayed for the charlie & leo pfp <3
last christmas by @tea-biscuits-books
synopsis : one lonely christmas you’re met with surprising company…
notes : to heal us all from e3 <3 thank you for this <3
conrad b'day surprise by @raven-dor
synopsis : conrad surprises you on your b'day :D
notes : as a july bby, i loved this!! and happy bday to anyone having an upcoming bday hahah <3 or belated happy bday <3
Strawberry Kiss by @weirdfanaus
synopsis : you find out Conrad's still in love with Belly.
notes : yes. angst. but comfort. i love love this.
vampire by @cherrywaves333
synopsis : conrad locks eyes with reader for the first time since their break-up.
notes : i love me some good old angst!!!
A TASTE OF HEARTBREAK by @bnnyskirt
synopsis : in which reader attends the debutante ball with conrad, and leaves with heartbreak.
notes : i love angst always!!!! and and eagerly waiting for pt 2 AND I HOPE HE GROVELS <3!
Always, Almost by @/rainandsentences
synopsis : when her chest physically hurts and her heart flutters violently for him, how would she tell him? you don’t tell that stuff to your best friend… do you?
notes : this one. this one hits all the right places but brutally and it HURTS.
Chips and Nursing by @clearsaturns
synopsis : You went to buy some chips you were craving, and you never expected to find drops of blood on the floor when you came back home.
notes : super super cute <3 I love fics where it's reader taking care of the other person :((((
Three Creams, Two sugars by @munsonsmixtapes
synopsis: After months of pining for one of the regulars who always comes into the coffee shop where you work, he surprisingly asks you out.
notes : can I have like 14 of these. i LOVEEE this.
flower shop by @tenndderr
...more to be added ! & happy reading :D
synopsis : you didn't expect to fall in love with cousins beach or the people. until you meet susannah fisher, who finds you when you need her most. who would have expected you'd fall in love with her son?
notes : love this so far!! super excited to see where it's headed :)
࿐ synopsis ⦂ you could wear the crown and speak the right words and smile at all the right moments; and still find yourself alone in a garden, wondering if loving the fire lord was ever supposed to feel this much like disappearing.
꒰꒰ involving contents ⦂ soft angst with a pure fluff ending, fire lady responsibilities, a random oc, hidden feelings and a confrontation.
they dressed you in red and gold the way they'd dress a weapon before it's presented, with a manner that had nothing to do with what you want.
you stood very still while the handmaidens work. the robes were heavy, though the pins for your hair were even heavier. a headpiece was placed at your crown, while you admired the making of you becoming someone you didn't quite recognize, in the bronze mirror.
...fire lady... the title rested in your chest, bright enough with status, but never truly feeling like it belonged to you.
ZUKO appeared in the threshold behind your reflection. he was already dressed for this kind of life... the attire of statecraft suited him differently than it once did. you can see it in the way he carried the weight of the crown with admirably acceptable that this was where he was meant to be.
his eye found yours in the mirror. "are you done here?"
for a second, you thought of honesty... of the hundred courtiers waiting beyond the doors... the ministers with their assessments in their eyes... the way every room in this palace seemed to judge you. but amongst all that worry, you still thought about how much you love him, and how that love taught you to give in to the life that was offered with him...
"yes!"
the banquet was a perfection of performance.
you smiled when you were meant to. zuko sat to your left and managed the table of highborns like he had made peace with being looked at. you watched him from the corner of your eye... he was so good at this. how was he so good at this.
you weren't any good at it...
that you knew, the moment LADY SHAN, wife to one of zuko's senior generals, asked you what you make of the proposed trade with the earth kingdom... an easy question to anybody. you opened your mouth, and the only honest answer in your tired mind, was... I haven't been spoken to, on it properly and I'm afraid of saying the wrong thing... but, you decided to let it go with carefully dragged out words that probably meant nothing to her. you held your breath as she gave a polite smile and kept on.
when the final course arrived, you were so far behind your own eyes that the candlelights were speaking to you. you smiled for the last time, waiting for it to be over.
you were trying to even out your breathing when you heard his footsteps. zuko found you perched on the garden's bench, overgrown compared to the formal ones near the audience chambers... no one has been here in years.
"you left..." he brought up, attention shared between your abandoned headpiece beside you, your unheld up hair... and finally, the way you were sitting, shoulders down, face tilted up to the midnight sky.
"I needed air."
"I know." he came to sit by your side, close in silent comfort. "I saw your face during the shan conversation."
your eyes flutter shut for a second too long. "was it obvious?"
"to me." he spoke in hushed tones. "not to her."
you glanced down at the folded hands in your lap, still wrapped in red silk. "I don't know what I'm doing in there, zuko. I know how to be... I know who I am. I know that. but I don't know how to be that in there, in that room, with all of them watching me decide what words to say before I say them." you exhaled. "I don't know how to be your fire lady in a room that already has an opinion about what your fire lady should look like."
zuko stayed quiet for long enough, that you just had to face him. his profile, in the dim light, was serious for you mattered to him and he, now had to work out what to say without destroying your bond.
"...when I became fire lord," he began, "I sat in that throne room for an entire day of petitions and I understood maybe a third of what was being asked of me. and I had trained for it. I was certain everyone in the room knew how out of place I looked."
"that's different. you're... "
"I'm what?"
... you sighed, swallowing it back... you're zuko.
"I didn't marry you because you were born for this," he said. "no one is born for this. I barely survived learning it, and I had years of it before my exile as preparation." he twisted to look you in the eyes, now. "I married you because you are... you're honest in a way that people in that room have forgotten how to be. you're kind without overthinking it. you see things." he paused. "those aren't weaknesses in a fire lady. those are exactly what the fire nation has been missing."
"I couldn't answer a question about trade policy," you deflected.
"I'll have someone fill you in on that. properly, this time .. I should have done that already. that's on me." his jaw tightened slightly at his mistake of being so caught up on having you a wife and your time, that he forgot, the both of you weren't the only two to exist in his world of duties. "I keep forgetting that I can't just throw you in and expect you to swim because I know you can. that's not how this works. you needed scaffolding and I didn't build you any and I'm sorry."
"I'm not fragile," you started. "I'm not asking you to protect me from it."
"I know you're not." zuko picked up the headpiece from beside you, tumbled it over in his hands, studying detail. "I'm asking myself to be better at the parts of this that are mine to carry. preparing you. telling you when something's going to be hard instead of assuming you'll figure it out." he set it down, gently. "we're a team in this. that means the failures are mine too."
he stared you down, waiting on you... though you weren't sure what he was waiting for... permission, correction, or simply for you to say something true .. the truth is what you chose.
"I was scared tonight," you confessed. "not all the time. there were moments I was fine. but the scared parts were very scared."
"that's allowed." his eyes, in this light, were very gold. "I was scared tonight too, for the record."
a half laugh left you. "you looked so calm."
"I've had more practice looking calm than being calm." the corner of his mouth lifted heavenward. "It's a different skill."
you spilled laughter again, properly this time, and something in your chest set free the tension that had been building since the handmaidens first pinned your hair.
zuko reached over, in search of your hand. his fingers were always fired up. "...next time," he said, "come find me before you disappear into the garden. we can leave together for a few minutes. I need the air too."
"people will notice."
"let them." his thumb swiped your knuckles, once. "I am the fire lord. If I decide my wife and I need five minutes of quiet, I think I can make that decision."
it was quietly radical in his words of my wife... you were never something as little as a title, or a trophy draped in gold to be presented to crowded rooms.
you flipped your hand over and held his the right way. "alright" you agreed. "next time."
he nodded, but neither of you moved for a while. the lantern light from the main hall was lost to the moonlight. you can hear the faint drift of a late musician still playing in the palace... you sat in the garden until the song ended. soon, Zuko fetched your headpiece, standing, and offered you his hand... it was time to return... together.
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im so late but thanks to all the talented writers who are feeding me as I travel down the adult Zuko rabbit hole. 6 year old me is throughly please with his outcome 🫶🏾
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can u believe last year i actually manipulated one of my teachers into thinking i handed up my project and she was like “oh yea alanah i remember reading yours it was really good i think i gave you 90% for it?” and i literally said “im pretty sure it was higher than that and she ended up giving me 96% for a project i never did
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