Sugar In The Raw

Eartha Kitt performing at El Rancho Vegas in 1955.

Having travelled to numerous places to meet POTs, I have had a mental note of a little checklist that I always use. I am finally writing it down because I see that a lot of people are interested in travelling to meet their POTs, or sex workers/escorts interested in meeting with clients that are not from the same hometown and wish to travel. Travelling is a lot of fun but you must also be aware and stay safe. Here is a little check list that I have come up with that will help ensure more of your safety and comfort while travelling. Make sure you can honestly answer all these questions and fill it out fully before you travel anywhere!

Xoxo love J (IntlSugarBaby)

Checklist & Questions:

The Security:

1. Do I know his real name?

2. Do I know his business/work?

3. Do I have his real contact information?

4. Have I had a Skype conversation with him yet? (To verify pics are real)

5. Have I had a phone conversation with him yet? 

6. Have I researched him enough? (Is he on any criminal web pages, SB blacklist, anything in the news about him, etc.)

7. Did you give all this information to at least 2-3 trusted sources? (Give one to a friend that you trust in person, another one that is from the sugar bowl could be from tumblr, and etc. Make sure people have this information!)

8. Do I have security cash in case things go wrong? (Always make sure you have extra cash on you in case things go wrong. I would say maybe 200-500 extra on you. You never know)

9. Have I discussed intimacy with him? (Does he know that you will not be having sex on the first date you are down there? That you will not tolerate inappropriate behaviour?)

The Comfort:

1. Where am I travelling to? How long am I travelling to this area for? (I only recommend 2-3 days maximum for a first travel)

2. If I am travelling longer than 3 hours on a plane, am I getting first class? (You bet your ass you better be!)

3. Am I getting round trip flights? (Double check and call the airline to make sure it is valid! If you feel more comfortable booking yourself make sure you get all the money to book through PayPal for your trip!)

4. Am I getting my own hotel room? Is it booked with: Four Seasons, W Hotel, Trump Hotel, etc? (Non-negogiable. You must get your own hotel room. No ifs, ands, or buts. Call the front desk to guarantee it is booked and to make sure you have your own room. Make sure you are ALSO getting a nice hotel, not some cheap MOTEL!)

5. Have I discussed allowance and payments to come down? (Plane ticket and accommodation do NOT account for your time being spent down there. You must be paid for your time that you are with him. Usually for my 2-3 day rule I would ask anywhere between $1,000-3,000. It all depends for how many times you see him, how long you see him, etc.)

6. Have I discussed a “free-time” with him? (You need a break from him. You need your own time. Within each day you are down there say you need this which can be used to explore, have your own spa day, etc. You are NOT required to be with them at every moment!)

7. Do I have arrangements that a car is picking me up from my house/friends house/local area to the airport and back from the airport? As well as soon as I land in the designated town that I am being picked up by a car and drove straight to the hotel? (Never hop in a car with him straight from the airport. Make sure you go straight to your hotel from a limo/taxi car paid for by him you should not be wasting a dime on anything down there. If you need transportation to the airport from your hometown make that known to him!)

8. Have I discussed when I will be getting my payment? (I always ask for it as soon as I meet up with him in an envelope. This allows you that if no matter if there isn’t a connection there you still get paid! Do not accept payment after your date through paypal or any other way, or cheques. Always make sure it is in cold, hard, cash and in an envelope first meeting. No excuses) 

9. What is the itinerary once I get there? (Make sure you know a list of exactly what you are doing. Are you going to a broadway show? The casino? A dinner? Where is the locations + addresses? Make sure to always keep checking in with your “safety” sisters aka friends! Also plan! If you are going to LA and want to go to Hollywood tell your POT. Remember this is a little trip for you so enjoy it!)

What to pack in my suitcase:

1. Always bring a carry on or a large purse. It is a lot quicker to go through the airport without having to check any bags. Remember to always pack light as well because you definitely will be shopping down there!

2. Bring 1 casual outfit. This is for site-seeing, going out and exploring. Something you feel comfortable in (shoe wise) and can walk around for extended periods of time. I would suggest a pair of jeans cute sandals or flats and a super cute top. Accessorize to make yourself look better - nice purse, sunglasses, bracelets/watch etc.

3. Bring 2 nice dinner outfits. I usually am super indecisive when it comes to dinner outfits. I usually bring two really nice ones! One will be a tight dress medium-short length, and another a more longer dress that is classier. Once you arrive in the city you will know what fits in more there and what is easier and more comfortable to wear. Bring your best heels: Louboutins! And of course accessories.

4. Bring 1 Sleeping wear. Usually a comfy top and bottom, or if you are feeling more risqué bring a sexy night gown or something. Remember you have your own hotel room and intimacy is not expected on your first trip down there. This is purely for your comfort!

5. All your sleepover gear stuff. Toothbrush, small lube of toothpaste, make up remover wipes, hair and bobby pins, hair ties, deodorant, a super mini body spray (check your airlines for maximum you can bring).

6. Your make up and accessories. Bring your most used make up such as: Foundation, powder, eyeliner, mascara, eye shadow, a couple of brushes, eyebrow pencil and lip gloss. You can bring bronzer and blush as well but remember don’t bring your entire make up kit! Some stuff might get lost… bring stuff you DEFINITELY would use! As for accessories: sunglasses, a statement watch or bracelet, and ring possibly. Keep it minimum, stick to statement pieces! Don’t want to loose anything!

7. Bring 1 Bathing Suit. You know maybe you want to take a dip in the pool, go to the sauna, or head to the beach on your time off. Who knows, always great to have a bathing suit packed just in case - you never know!

8. Extra feminine supplies. Just in case you get your period on the trip, you never know! Also bring extra gravol, or advil that you potentially could need trying different foods, or just not feeling well on the trip. 

9. Pack anything else you think is necessary! Remember, pack light and research what the weather is going to be like when you get down there. Is it going to be warm? Rainy? Cloudy? Check all the weather and make sure you know and pack accordingly!

Plane Checklist:

1. Bring head phones, ipod (if you don’t have an iphone), phone charger, lip gloss, little compact mirror, passport, wallet with extra cash in it, your drivers license (if you are over age of 19 in Canada you can drink there, or over 21 in States! That way you don’t have to bring your passport along with you), a magazine, and little snack to enjoy. This is usually in my hand bag/purse that I also carry on the plane. It is your plane survival and extra time alone survival kit!

2. Get your boarding passes in order, text your POT that you arrived at the airport and just wait to board the flight!

Enjoy your trips meeting your POTs! Remember to have a great time and go through the check list. If they are hesitant about any parts of it or can’t answer and try to negotiate around some of the things… these are viewed as red flags. Immediately drop them. A POT will ALWAYS want your safety and comfort to come first. If he speaks of sex in the hotel, or anything that you are not comfortable with you immediately lay down the line saying that it won’t be tolerated. Make sure to stand up for your values and comfort. The worst thing these men can say is NO which is not a big deal at all. There is a million other guys to replace them. They are indeed replaceable.

Have an amazing trip to where ever you travel to. Remember to stay safe! Safety is a number one priority! Wishing all the hustlers the best of luck.

Someone asked me about conversation pointers and who better to ask than the PRO of talking to people. Not to toot my own horn but I just have a knack for talking to people, maybe it was because I worked in restaurants and bars since I was 16 so I was forced to keep a conversation going. 

A POT date is a “Get to know you process” I ask questions to determine who they are as a person and if their information is viable to what they put on their profile and to find out what you have in COMMON. 

Tip #1:  READ a book or many, so much that you can articulate your words in a fashionable manner to which you sound educated.

See how proper that sounded? This is how I speak to my SD’s and why I can and have dated CEO’s of big companies. They love an intelligent human being and you know what? I don’t even have my Associates Degree. However, I can bullshit like no tomorrow because you know what bullshit it? Knowing a little information about A and a little information about B and piecing it together just enough to sound like you know what you’re talking about. The more educated you sound, the less these men are going to think they can fuck you over. 

Tip #2 : Ask one question that gauges a story that way you can sit and listen to most of the date or you can sit and talk while he listens.  If you just answer the question with simple answers, that’s where you’re going to have short. awkward conversations. When you answer, answer with other questions. Examples of my answers below. 

Tip #3 Be REAL…to an extent. 

The point of being a sugar baby is to have an actual relationship with these guys. One of my recent guys stated that he went out with this girl who put “Drama free! :)” on her profile Yet all she was, was drama. So be mostly honest with who you are to them because they’re investing in who you are as a person rather than JUST a pussy and looks like an escort. (I love my escorts out there…and you all know it if you’ve followed me) 

ALWAYS SPEAK YOUR MIND if you like or dislike something. I don’t care who you are, you show more intregrity by stating an honest opinion than going along with what someone says. Even if I do, I politely let them state theirs and sometimes I’ll give my opinion if it permits. 

Questions to ask : 

What do you do? (job wise)  —> How did you get into that profession? 

Me : I’m currently working at an upscale cocktail lounge while going to Arizona State University for Business Analytics and Entrepreneurship. I was Pre-Med for a while but saw my roommate go through the schooling and hated it, but my parents have always been into business. BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH....  (He can ask more questions based on the stories you give him, thus creating a longer conversation) 

What got you on The Site? How long have you been on it? <— Personal favorite one

How have your experiences been so far?  

Me : “Oh, really? That’s good because man I’ve heard some horror stories on the guy side of things like… _______” <—-Sharing mutual experiences creates things in common and more conversation.  

Oh, you’ve traveled? Where was your favorite place you’ve ever gone to and WHY? 

Me : “OMG, I just went to ____ and have always wanted to go to these places because of _____” 

Where are you from originally and why did you move here? How long have you been here? 

Tip # 4: Talk about the things you like, mostly for gift ideas. 

For example, I talked about how I LOVE this spring season because LIGHT PINK is the statement color right now. OMG. Even the Louis Vuitton bags… Now my SD knows that if he were to ever get me anything, it has to be light pink. 

Tip #5 : Before your date go to Google and look at the news, pick a current even that you can talk about. Preferably in Business, Wallstreet or Political or something related to your SD’s profession. Again, this not only shows your educated, but interested in his line of work, or NOT. 

Tip #6 : Don’t confuse oversharing with things honest about you. 

Granted I always avoid talking about ANY experiences with my family, trauma, or my past. Try to talk about the FUTURE, the things you want to do, not what happened to you in the past. If you go in that mindset of thinking, you won’t overshare. 

You’re creating a new chapter with your SD and his/your life not repeating an old one.

-Hope this helps