trying on a metaphor
AnasAbdin
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PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
Not today Justin
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@styleses
The weirdest instance of “getting my wires crossed” I’ve ever experienced: I had a piece of candy at my desk. My intention was to simultaneously eat the candy and start a brief work task. I put the candy in my mouth and felt a surge of alarm as I was convinced, for a fraction of a second, that I had somehow eaten the task I was about to start.
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I am so proud to say that my college is so LGBT friendly, that in a survey Res Life put out they forgot to include straight people.
This is a fucking power move
i literally never force myself to do anything thats probably my biggest problem abjzsdgdhdj
me: ugh i dont want to do that
brain: dont do it then
me: can’t argue with that
what do people in their twentys do except go to the grocery store……….
go back home from the grocery store
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absolutely disgusted by this frame of the rugrats intro, mainly because of the grown male hands
“what the…. where the hell am i”
i learned that in the Spiderman comic ‘Spider-Man: Reign’, Mary Jane dies due to exposure to Spiderman’s radioactive sperm.
Mary Jane Watson-Parker died of cancer brought on by exposure to Peter’s radioactive semen during intercourse over the years.
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And that is a constant of human existence
Yesterday at work these two 12yo boys came through my line and i’m instantly like. oh Boy. Because solo children at a grocery store are always forces of chaos, good or bad
But thankfully these ones were totally pleasant, and when i asked if they wanted a receipt one of them pulled out a random fuckin receipt from his bag and asked “Do YOU???” and y’all, i lost my shit… What a power move. When will i ever be this funny
jury duty cat
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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